We’re back at the Hold, and there’s amber burning holes in our pockets. Cammie examines the fabric. Umbi digs around. Troy spreads his wings.
Dive into our ship combat mechanics, classes from Mage Hand Press, the countries of Verda Stello, and other changes we’ve made for C3 HERE!
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Cast & Crew
- Game Master, Co-Producer: Eric Silver
- Co-Host (Umbi), Co-Producer, Sound Designer, Composer: Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host (Chamomile Cassis), Co-Producer: Julia Schifini
- Co-Host (Troy Riptide), Co-Producer: Amanda McLoughlin
- Theme Song: Lyrics by Eric Silver, music by Brandon Grugle. Vocals by Brandon Grugle, Lauren Shippen, Julia Schifini, Roux Bedrosian, Eric Silver, Tyler Silver, and Amanda McLoughlin. Available for purchase here.
- Artwork: Allyson Wakeman
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is an actual play podcast with tangible worlds, genre-pushing storytelling, and collaborators who make each other laugh each week. We welcome everyone to the table, from longtime players to folks who’ve never touched a roleplaying game before. Hop into our current campaign, a pirate story set in a world of plant- and bug-folk, or marathon our completed stories with the Camp-Paign, a MOTW game set in a weird summer camp, Campaign 2 for a modern superhero game, and Campaign 1 for a high fantasy story. And once a month we release the Afterparty, where we answer your questions about the show and how we play the game. New episodes every Tuesday.
Transcript
Eric: I remember a time before the Cascade dried up. Here in Verda Stello, the four nations of plants and bug people flourished and thrived. But the great waterfall that fed the land slowed to a trickle, revealing a vast Salt Sea and unknown islands. The only guide were the words of the 13 Dried Carvings. “The water will slow to fall, but the tides are turning. Find the Infinite Lake to replenish the world and discover the Salmon who will grant you a wish of whatever you desire.” This marks the beginning of the tide, as many Greenfolk hauled onto ships to find the Infinite Lake and maybe riches, adventure, excitement, and purpose along the way. And what exactly is a Salmon? Is that a berry? That was 50 years ago, and the Tide rushes forward ever still. There are many stories caught on the wind between sails but why don't we hear just one? Of a butterfly gunman with clipped wings, a ripened and explosive piece of produce, and a witch made out of tea. This is Join the Party Campaign 3, The Rising Tide!
[theme]
Eric: On the beach of the Hold, a pirate with a braided beard, and a dirty and sweat-stained bandana is standing on the beach, holding a cup of coffee and sipping it. Looking for the little bubbles that come up from where the big crab who sleeps at the bottom of the reef. Every so often the big— the big crab does yawn and it comes off like a big bubble and goes bloop.
Brandon: Aww.
Eric: So it's a good place to stand.
Amanda: Ohh.
Eric: As they're standing there, sipping their—their bean juice, a sound starts to come closer. It's faint. You can't make it out. It could be anything, it could be the yaw of some— of some flocks gulls. So—of sungulls, I already came up with this one. Maybe it's the ya—
Julia: They could be another species, that's okay.
Eric: Well, Julia, all sungulls is not actually one type of bird, it's the general idea of them who live, the gulls.
Julia: Right. Like their genus of it.
Eric: It's the genus, yeah. It's like— not the species of this plant bird, it's some— it's something else. the
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: It’s the kingdom of gulls.
Eric: Yeah. You—maybe it's— is it the squawk of sungulls feasting on some bread that accidentally got dropped in the sea? Is it a wayward battle happening in the morning light? No, it's the unmistakable sound of a coxswain demanding strokes from their paddling crew. At the front of the crumpled Sea Whip, where the whole nose of the ship is gone. Perched on top is three different small mounds of algae, screaming—
Eric (as Harold): Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!
Eric: And the crew of the Sea Whip are long shore paddling the two out of three damaged husk of their once proud pirate ship, which looked like crap before but—
Amanda: I was gonna say, excuse me, not a lot’s different here.
Eric: So there—there's a—the sail is totally ripped, and the front is sheared clean off, to the shore of the Hold.
Eric (as Harold): Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Umbi, I know you have old man strength, don't dog it now, we're close.
Brandon (as Umbi): I think I'm dying, oh my god.
Eric (as Harold): You always say that! Troy, come on! Troy?
Amanda (as Troy): You're great at motivating, man. I've never felt better.
Eric (as Harold): Cammie, you're sweating right through your hat. I just wanted you to know that, you're still doing a great job.
Julia (as Cammie): Talk to my duplicate, she's the one who's paddling.
Julia: Cammie's in the corner taking a sip of tea.
Eric: We are back at a another—this is Skill Tree 2: 2 Skill 2 Tree.
Brandon: Wooo!
Eric: We have to do another downtime episode here at the wonderful Hold. We have a lot to deal with here. But first, I would love the pla— a chance for the players to come to our new branded segment by Mage Hand Press called Leveling Up: Showing Off More Things From Valda's Spire of Secrets: The Players of Join the Party Level Up From Level Three To Level Five.
Brandon: Can we get Mike on the phone—like Mage Hand Mike, maybe just like workshop that a little bit. It’s a little long. But– maybe or—
Eric: No, he—he confirmed it, he said it was good.
Brandon: He likes it?
Eric: Yeah, he’s good, he’s good.
Julia: Okay, great.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, listen, we—we get paid by the second, not by the—not by the copy.
Eric: By like Charles Dickens.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah. Doesn't matter what the words are, as long as the words are there.
Julia: I also thought that you said a Brandon Section, like a Brandon Section. And I was like Brandon gets his own section in this one?
Brandon: I know. Yeah.
Julia: —That's kind of cool, I’m into it.
Brandon: I did for a second too, and I panicked and I was like—
Julia: You're like, “Oh what do I have to do?”
Eric: Well Brandon, you do need to use the MIDI version of some sort of like sports—sports radio thing, that's gonna be the— the that's gonna be the music band for this entire section.
Brandon: It—yes, the ESPN song, but it's on a pan flute.
Julia: I love that.
Amanda: Mmm, that’d be right.
Eric: Here's the thing though. The pan flute is— is hooked up to a MIDI keyboard, which is hooked up to your computer.
Julia: There you go.
Brandon: Yeah, exactly.
Eric: Just to really get that crunch that we're looking for in postmodern pan flute.
Brandon: Yeah, a whole three bits.
Eric: Got—that's a good number of bits.
Brandon: It's a good bit.
Eric: Because I went to an Anamanaguchi concert and he only used one and a half for a three hour set.
Brandon: Woah!
Julia: I don't know what the fuck that is, but I love it.
Eric: The people who know that it is uh—it's good, it's a good reference. Hey, dawgs, let's uh—let's level— let's level up! We're going from level three to level five!
Everyone: Weeeee!
Eric: Why don't we tell the fine folks at home what we're doing? Let's go from least complex to most complex. So let's go, Troy, Cammie, Umbi.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: I would like it if you called us, “Hey, salty sea dogs.”
Eric: Okay.
Julia: Hey, salty sea dogs.
Eric: Hey, salty sea dogs, do you want to level up?
Amanda: Yay!
Brandon: Weee!
Julia: Yes, please.
Amanda: Resident Thembo here. Hi, it's Troy Riptide. I get an ability score improvement and I'm pleased to report, everybody, that because Troy has now read one, count them one book. My wisdom is no longer -1, it's 0.
Julia: Yay!
Brandon: Oh, hell yeah. Well, it's all those titles of books that Troy also read.
Amanda: Exactly right.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: So it really helps, yeah.
Amanda: And as soon as I read more titles of books, I might get a +1 to wisdom, it would be wonderful for me.
Eric: You're proving the educational system of the United States correct. It's like read books and you'll learn more. Now your perception’s better.
Julia: That's true.
Amanda: I am much beefier in HP, I'm up to 40 hit points, which is—
Brandon: Ohh.
Amanda: —rate. And I also get 2 attacks per turn.
Brandon: Ohh, nice.
Amanda: That's my gunslinger Level 5 improvement.
Brandon: Fuck yeah.
Julia: Hell yeah, dawg.
Brandon: That's sick.
Amanda: That's me.
Eric: Hell yeah. Hey, magic user.
Julia: Hey!
Eric: What you got?
Julia: What–
Brandon: [sings] Hey, magic user.
Julia: I got some–
Eric: [Eric sings parody of Hey Soul Sister while inserting the word, ‘magic user’] Hey, magic user on the radio, stereo that tea witch you know. Yup.
Julia: Just thinking about what the transcript’s gonna look like for that.
Eric: [Eric hum mumbles to himself]
Brandon: [sings parody of American Pie] Babye, miss-a magic user.
Eric: Just for the trans—transcript, don't even use it, just insert, “Eric tried his best to do a parody of Hey Soul Sister—
Julia: Great.
Eric: —while inserting the word magic user.”
Julia: Thank you.
Amanda: Tried? You succeeded.
Eric: Hey, I know we're all trying to empower me here, but like I tried.
Amanda: You succeeded in trying, which is what Troy heard is how you read.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: That's what Yoda used to say.
Julia: Yeah, I know.
Brandon: You succeeded in trying.
Eric: [imitates Yoda]: Do or do not, you— it was pretty good content.
Julia: So as a magic user I got some third-level spells now, which I'm very excited about. I'm gonna keep them in my back pocket for later so I can do shenanigans.
Eric: That's fine. Let's go.
Julia: I also gained a new Hex, which I'm also going to keep in my back pocket, so I can do shenanigans later.
Brandon: Oooohh!
Julia: And then finally, I got a new feature for the witch class which is called Insidious Spell. When you cast a witch spell that affects a creature that is under the effect of your hex, that creature has disadvantage on its first saving throw against the spell. This feature only applies to a hostile creature, which is the sole target of your hex.
Brandon: Fuck yeah.
Eric: That's really cool.
Amanda: Hell yeah.
Julia: Which is dope. So basically, everyone's going to be weak once I hex 'em.
Brandon: Fuck yeah.
Eric: That's cool, especially just the mixing and matching you can do here. Because like, not all hexes— all hexes are like debuffs, but they all do something different. So I like the idea of like pairing hexes with spells that they are even more likely to fail, which is very, very cool.
Julia: Yes.
Eric: But it has to be singular target hex, singular target spell. Like i—it doesn't count for AOE stuff. Interesting, interesting.
Julia: I also gained some HP, I am buffer now and I've got 37 hit points which pretty good—
Brandon: Noice.
Julia: —for a little tea witch.
Brandon: For a magic user, yeah.
Julia: And I one, talked to Eric off mic to scooch some of my ability score stuff around and increased my charisma by 1. So now I have nice chunky bonuses to both my wisdom and charisma.
Brandon: Nice.
Eric: Hell yeah.
Brandon: Did everyone get their proficiency bonus up too, to three?
Amanda: Mmm.
Eric: Yes. The thing that happened for all characters going from three to five is we're leveling up two levels worth of HP. Everyone's proficiency bonus goes from 2 to 3, and every single one of y'all get an ASI bonus because that's what happens to PCs at Level 4.
Brandon: Anglish as a second improvement.
Eric: Alright, so let's talk about the alchemist really quickly. Because I think it's important to know that—
Brandon: Is this an intervention?
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: Yes. Stop throwing bombs at things.
Eric: No, Brandon, keep throwing bombs at things. But here's— the wonderful thing about the Alchemist is—and I'm putting, doing some commentary on behalf of our good friend Mage Hand Mike over at Va—Mage Hand Press. Is like the Alchemist is an improved version of the Artificer. I think the Artificer is incredibly complicated, overly—overly annoying. But it— there's a lot of choice in the Alchemist. Because of that, we are unlocking, now that we're going from three to five, we are unlocking so many choices that Brandon has here. That is going to make Umbi the most Bomberman he can, but that's like the vibe but there's so many different things that happen, that can happen to the Alchemist that we're starting to unleash here.
Brandon: That is a good summary. Thank you Mage Hand Mike's uh mouth?
Amanda: Spokes mouse, Brandon. Excuse you.
Brandon: Spokesmouse, yeah thank you.
Eric: Spokesmouse, so there's— so there's a little mouse on Mage Hand Mike's shoulder—
Amanda: Yes.
Eric: —who's saying all of this.
Julia: Who’s got Eric's voice.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: But also it's Mage Hand Mike using his spokesmouth to make, to speak.
Amanda: I see, he had a spoke mouse.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Got it.
Eric: It's—it's PR.
Brandon: Hi, I'm tiny mouse Eric
Eric (as Spokemouse): Alright, to all of the characters get an ASI bonus.
Julia: It's weird, it looks like the dad from An American Tail.
Eric (as Spokemouse): Yeah, we're all canonically Jewish. That one is not even mean.
Julia: Yeah, yeah.
Brandon (as Spokemouse): Does anyone want some iced coffee, I'm going out for some.
Julia: Adorable.
Brandon: See that's the thing that Eric likes is iced coffee.
Julia: That's true, can confirm.
Amanda: Love it.
Julia: Seen him drink it.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: And he said wow, that's good, I like this.
Eric: This is going so great.
Brandon: Okay. So for Umbi, I got a couple of things that I am going to go ahead and say y'all. I know this is gonna shock you. I'm kind of a bit— a little bit leaning into Support here a little bit.
Julia: Wha—what?
Brandon: I know.
Amanda: What?
Julia: What?!
Brandon: I know. I can still do a good chunk of damage, don't get me wrong. But let's go one by one. So at fourth level, I got the ability score improvement which I changed my CON and my intelligence—my intelligence is my modifier so that-- everything went up. And then I got more HP with a CON which is great, and then I got something called [in a spooky voice] Discoveries.
Julia: Ooohh, alright
Eric: Yes, Discoveries are like for those you've played before, they're kind of like Warlock Boons, how it's just like an interesting way to level up your character directly with like an extra kind of like, ability. There's no other better—better way to say it.
Julia: Cool.
Brandon: Mmm. Mmmm. So the first ability, sort of discovery ability thing I get um, Amanda, I'm gonna need you to hold on to your chair.
Amanda: Okay, I'm holding.
Brandon: This is called explosive missile.
Amanda: Woah!
Brandon: As a bonus action, you can load one of your bombs onto the head of a crossbow bolt.
[Julia gasps]
Brandon: Instead of its normal damage, this bolt deals damage as if the bomb has been primed and thrown but it doesn't have a blast radius. Only one of your bombs can be loaded to the bolt at a time. And you can't fire an explosive bolt at the same turn you throw a bomb.
Amanda: That's me!
Brandon: You now have bomb arrows.
[Julia gasps]
Amanda: Yay!
Eric: Yes.
Julia: Yeees!
Eric: So we discussed this a little bit, but it turns out it was right goddamn in the fucking book.
Brandon: Yup.
Amanda: It's almost like Mage Hand Mike made both of these classes and foresaw that maybe they could pair up.
Julia: Hell yeah, dawg.
Brandon: And the best thing is that it's a bonus action. So I can load up your arrow and then on my turn, throw a bomb as well.
Eric: Yeah, here—here's the interesting about— thing about this, is that, like if Brandon wanted to put, or if Umbi had a crossbow, he couldn't shoot and throw at the same time. However, nothing in the rules say that you can't load up someone else's crossbow bolt and then toss your own bomb.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: And we're—we're gonna figure out the action economy of like priming bombs and stuff like that. I’ll have to figure that out.
Brandon: WelI, I figured this out because I was reading it and I was like, shit, have I supposed to been priming bombs at one term, and then throwing on the second one? No.
Eric: Oh, right.
Brandon: So according to priming-- the priming rules, it is the use in object action, which is an action. But in the rules itself it says you can use that action and attack—
Eric: Right.
Brandon: —in the same turn.
Brandon: Right. It's not an attack, the— it's a special action called Priming Bombs that'll let you throw at the same time.
Brandon: Yes.
Eric: So that's perfect.
Brandon: Yes.
Eric: The only thing I'm gonna say is that you guys are gonna have to like, stand next to each other to make it happen.
Julia: Yeah, sure.
Eric: But other than that, that's totally fine.
Brandon: I'd only be able to prime Troy's bomb arrow, and then throw a normal bomb. I wouldn't be able to make a second special bomb.
Eric: Got it. Okay, yeah, that's the thing I was thinking about. Alright, that's fine. But also the normal bombs are good and your damage makes up for that.
Brandon: Oh, they’re chunk.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: They're chunk.
Amanda: Tell me more about the radius. Does that mean that it only— it only impacts the target?
Brandon: Yes, correct.
Eric: Yeah, it doesn't blow up—
Julia: Okay, good.
Eric: —It just hits the person.
Amanda: Hell yeah.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: Nice.
Brandon: So something I don't think we've been doing correctly actually, is that if I decide to have a bomb radius, which I can decide not to, but when I do, the target has to make a bomb save DC, which for me is 14 now. But the radius–
Julia: Hell yeah.
Brandon: —people in the radius make a DC 11 check.
Eric: Oh, yeah.
Julia: Oh, okay.
Brandon: But—
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: —I don't think that makes a huge difference.
Eric: No, I don't think so.
Brandon: In my previous levels, it was only a 12 anyway, my bomb DC, so it was 1 point different, so it's fine.
Eric: Oh, wonderful. Okay.
Brandon: Yeah. Now, the second Discovery I get, which is tight. There's a lot of cool ones so—and I can switch one out every time I—I gain a level which is fun. But I decided to use what they call Poisoner. So your research into poisonous compounds has taught you how to concoct a lethal toxin so you gain proficiency with the Poisoners Kit. Additionally, you can craft the following poisons when you brew potions, and you use your bomb save DC instead of a normal save DCs which is higher, which is tight. So the important thing here for me is that, so there's like antitoxins, basic poisons, boring.
Amanda: Healing, who needs that?
Julia: Healing, who needs?
Brandon: That's a different one, that's not a poti—that's not a poison.
Julia: That's fair. Usually healing is not poison.
Eric: That's true.
Julia: Yes, but I've got a couple of really cool ones. So one is called Oil of Taggit, which basically they become poisoned and then become like conscious for 24 hours.
Eric: Wow!
Brandon: Super useful.
Amanda: Wow!
Brandon: Which is a contact potion. And then importantly, I've also got Truth Serum, which is basically a Zone of Truth spell, which is cool. And then finally the most important one here. Well, I have two options here, but one I liked the best is Serpent Venom. Which means that if they're subjected to this poison, they must succeed on the bomb saving throw. If they fail, they take three D6 poison damage and half as much on a success. But the important thing is that this is an injury potion, meaning that it can be applied to weapons, ammunition, and other objects.
Amanda: Oooh.
Brandon: And it remains potent until delivered through a wound or washed off. So Troy, you now have poison arrows.
Amanda: Yay!
Julia: I love it.
Eric: Jesus Christ.
Amanda: That's amazing.
Eric: Let's see how this do. This is also better because if you make Serpent Venom, they're gonna be like, oh, well, this is obviously from a nightshade snake. So it's definitely not from an Alchemist, I know, which also is pretty cool.
Julia: That's true.
Brandon: I love that yeah.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: So I'm—you're now Link, and I am your Zelda. Congrats.
Amanda: I don't get that reference, but I'm loving being the arrow shooter to your arrow maker-more-deadlier.
Eric: Ya-ha! Ya-ha!
Julia: Ya-ha!
Brandon: So I'll let you know when I make all these potions and stuff. But yeah, you'll be able to add three D6 poison damage on an arrow hit, or now two D10 bomb damage on your bomb hit, which is big.
Julia: Damn.
Eric: That's also going to be really interesting because that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with the arrows bouncing off of stuff. Like the damage of being hit by the arrow gets reduced by half, but the poison is still—
Julia: Poison.
Eric: —The poison is still poison.
Amanda: That's true.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: So that's tight as hell. I also changed my laughing gas bomb. So I have bomb formulae and every time I will take a level, I can change one. So I changed the laughing gas to an oil bomb, which is a D6 fire. But what it does is you throw it and basically cover the targets or target in flammable oil. And the next time that creature takes fire damage, it takes an extra D6 fire damage for each die of fire damage rolled up to a maximum half my Alchemist level rounded up. So a maximum of three.
Julia: Dang.
Brandon: So it can be removed by a gallon of water.
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: But I also forgot that my regular ass bomb is fire damage.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: Wee!
Brandon: So it's possible that I could throw this oil bomb and then throw a regular bomb with like three reagent dice if I wanted to, and it would take to D10 plus 2 damage, plus 3 D6 damage.
Julia: Holy shit.
Julia: And if it's a construct you multiply that by two, right?
Brandon: Yep, so I could blow the fuck out of a ship.
Julia: So Brandon discovered how to do fireball. Great.
Brandon: Now also the cool thing is if Julia or Troy has any fire damage moves, they can also take advantage of that spell.
Julia: Well, Brandon I did take as a cantrip Produce Flame, so—
Brandon: Ooohh.
Eric: Always a good one. Always a good one.
Brandon: And then I also took a new bomb formulae or a bomb formula I guess it's singular, called Quiet bomb, which is a D8 fire so also works with oil. When this bomb detonates, it only makes a low thud audible out to 10 feet which normally it's audible up to a mile, and a puff of smoke to mask the light given off by its blast and creatures have—
Amanda: Helpful.
Brandon: —disadvantage on ability checks to detect that this bomb was detonated nearby.
Eric: That's tight as hell.
Brandon: A sneak bomb, which is fun.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: That’s pretty cool.
Amanda: That sounds like a real ‘my players are unruly’ comment, is like hey, can I just— can I do a bomb but like real quiet? And the DM’s like, no.
Julia: No, that's not how bombs work. Well, that's how this bomb works, bitch.
Amanda: No, you can't.
Brandon: Finally I get a really fun—
Julia: There's still more.
Eric: There's still a lot more, yeah.
Brandon: Yeah, I got a lot of shit, Julia.
Julia: Wow.
Amanda: Wow.
Brandon: And then finally I get oh, a really cool small thing that's called a flashbang, which is a flashbang. But as a bonus action, I can throw one at my feet, disorienting and distracting nearby foes. Each large or smaller creature within five feet can't take reactions until the start of my next turn. So I can disengage basically for free.
Julia: Oh, nice.
Brandon: Which is great. And it's useful if I—because I should be a ranged bomber I think is the idea. So—
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: That is my thoughts.
Eric: Hell yeah. Yes, to sum up all the things that happened to Umbi here, alongside all the things that regular PCs have you get one more formula and you get to swap them out. Your reagent dice go up, you get two Discoveries and you get a flashbang. So all that stuff is happening all at the same time. The jump from three to five for Alchemist is pretty, pretty wild.
Brandon: Yeah, I honestly felt a little bit like I was kind of useless at level three.
Julia: Aww, noo. You were—no, like you straight up the— I know that sounded sarcastic, but it wasn't true.
Amanda (as Troy): You must have read like 10 books overnight, man.
Brandon: But now at five, yeah it's— it's really coming into its own so—
Julia: Hell yeah, dawg.
Brandon: I can do some massive damage. Yeah, my bomb, when I prime them, they went up to two D10 as opposed to one D10 which is big.
Julia: Sick.
Brandon: So—
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: — I'm excited.
Julia: Woo!
Eric: Yeah, you would have blown up that ceiling twice as fast. Alright, folks. Well, that segment’s done. I'm sure you uh—thanks for playing that song the entire way through. Well, it seems like we have some stuff to do over the old skill tree.
Amanda: Wee!
Brandon: Aye! Wee!
Eric: Wahoo! Alright, folks so we got one XP that you all get for completing the Book Depository Arc. And then I think we're ending up with three pieces of Amber here.
Brandon: Tight.
Julia: Yay!
Eric: So you have to use the XP even if you turn it into Amber, but you have a lot of stuff to deal with. Once again, the—for those of you listening along at home, we're going to put the skill tree image into the episode descriptions. So hopefully, if your podcast app can support images, you can check that out there, or you can always go to jointhepartypod.com/verda-stello which is also in the link in the episode description every single episode. And you can follow along, but we're gonna have a specific updated one that we're going into which has Doctor Doctor filled in. So we have a lot of stuff here, I mean, almost everything is still on the board other than Doctor Doctor, you can always decide to give Havana a class level up to figure out what kind of doctor he is.
Amanda: Eric, pirate doctor, please.
Eric: He is already a pirate doctor but he can be a straight-up medical doctor, a naturalist, something a little crunchy, a black hat, sort of like messing around on the fringes of society doctor, or he can become religious. And of course, we have all the various things here. You can dig and try to find some treasure, you can invest in the Mag–
Brandon: Diiiiig!
Eric: You can invest in the Magnolia—
Brandon: Sorry.
Eric: — Network. I tried to get so—
Brandon: Came out of me.
Eric: No, there are plenty of ways to dig. You can invest in the Magnolia Network which is—
[Amanda giggles]
Amanda: Magnolia Network!
Julia: Every time.
Amanda: Every time.
Eric: Which is where a husband and wife magnolia flower team starts to do some interior and exterior decorating on the Hold. You can start to drop the hammer and become the Lord the Manor here on the Hold. You can invest in Monster Wrangling of course. You can invest in the Putts and Pirate pot— Putts and Puppets Pirate Palladium and give the pirate the putt-putt golf and pire uh—the putt-putt golf and puppet show.
Julia: Yeah?
Eric: Get that up and running. You can invest in the ship by making a ship shape, or you can unlock some backstories of NPCs we met here on the Hold. And as always, you can give Orello some amber to try to get some stuff done, but that doesn't need to be-- happen specifically at this time. Like it's not part of the skill tree thing, but you can do that in general.
Amanda: Anytime.
Brandon: Eric, I have a small confession.
Eric: Yeah?
Brandon: When we started talking about the skill tree again for the first time, my first thought was do you think the skill tree has a wife? And there--
Julia: Yes, but she left a long, long time ago and they haven't seen the women ever since.
Eric: Yeah, Julia's correct, yes. It's a fantasy story, so we have to steal one thing from Tolkien, yeah. So—an—and the skill tree is an ent canonically, it has a beard. It's name, it's is– is Skill Root.
Julia: Ooh, I like it.
Eric: You can look at—you can talk to it like the Great Deku Tree.
Brandon: Yeah, fuck yeah.
Julia: Alright. So here's my suggestion, we have one XP already in the can, we have three Amber, why don't we convert two Amber into XP, keep one in the bank, and then we each get to pick something from the skill tree?
Brandon: Oh, that's a great idea. Do we have any things to use Amber for? Like do we need like a hint or a clue?
Julia: Um, I think we're like on the trail right now with the—
Amanda: The drought stone?
Julia: Yes, with the drought stone and what we found out from going into the newspaper so—
Brandon: So you think we're good?
Julia: I think we're good at the moment. But if we need to use that one, we can always use it with Orello.
Eric: Yeah, true.
Brandon: Obviously we do need to not fix our ship because we still want it to look bad, but you know what I mean.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: That's a good point. We—this is—this is downtime, each of you get one like downtime action, one of you is gonna have to give up that action to fix the ship. If you fix it by yourself, you're not a professional. So it's up to you.
Brandon: If we get the shipwright, does that negate that?
Eric: I think you'd still have to use the action but you—you would have professional help and that person would join your crew if you so choose.
Brandon: Cool.
Julia: That's true.
Amanda: I'm happy to—to do that.
Amanda (as Troy): When you think about it, ships are, it's just kind of like a barrel that you can go in so I'm happy to uh—to be the repair person here.
Brandon: Hey.
Amanda (as Troy): Whaddup?
Brandon: Amanda/Troy that's super true actually.
Julia: That is super true.
Amanda: Yup.
Brandon: I never thought about it that way.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah. I did learn um, I did learn that the part of the barrel what's the biggest is called the equator or the bilge which sounds, it sounds just like a thing like, hey, yeah, see you on the bilge, man. Or like, hey, Harold, you're looking really good on your bilge, and then Harold be laying, mmm you gotta buy me dinner first or whatever.
Eric: No, Harold’s saying, don't talk about my bilge until you're ready to see my bunghole, that's what Harold says.
Brandon: Ohhhh.
Amanda: Yeah. And then um, Harold–
Eric: The bunghole is the hole in the cork in the–
Amanda: Yes.
Eric: – thing where the cork goes. Ha—
Amanda: Yes, yes.
Eric: —Harold knows lots of things.
Amanda: Yup. So—
Julia: Are you both reading the Barrel book? Is that what’s happening?
Amanda: Like the real-life barrel book?
Eric (as Harold): Cammie, I had a rich life before you all came along.
Julia: Sorry, that was Julia asking Amanda and Eric if you're both really reading the Barrel book that Amanda got from the library.
Eric: Julia, I already know about bungholes.
Julia: Okay.
Amanda: This is what Eric sounds like.
Julia: Alright. Alright, Amanda, if you feel confident doing the— the Ship Shape, I wanted to give you the opportunity to do Monster Wrangler, because I know in your heart of hearts, you want that. But we can also save it for next time, so—
Brandon: I mean, we can still do it. We can decide on what we want to do all three. We don't have to make individual decisions we don't want to, but yeah.
Julia: Right.
Amanda: I think it's a good idea to keep one amber in the bank. I don't think we necessarily need more than that.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Woaah!
Amanda: So—thank you, it is the color of our energy. And our energy right now is limping into the Hold.
Julia: Yes.
Amanda: So yeah, I'm happy with that, but I'm happy to use Troy's action on the repair.
Julia: Gotcha.
Eric: Cool.
Brandon: I think you've gotta. I mean, think about the thembo, like glistening muscles with the sea—salty sea spraying on you. You got to.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: You gotta.
Amanda: Exactly right. And as we of course do row back home onto the beach of the Hold and stop rowing, Troy is just like pumped up. And so he starts like pumping a barrel over his head just—just for fun, because he's like, he's jacked, he loves it.
Eric: Cool.
Julia (as Cammie): So it's like so hot, but like, I— Troy, I would never think of you that way, but it is extremely attractive when you do that.
Amanda (as Troy): Thanks, Cammie.
Eric: Cool. Okay, so are you going to use one thing on ship shape, getting a shipwright?
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: Okay, we're gonna put— I'm gonna put that in my pocket. We're going to deal with that once Troy starts fixing the ship. So that's one, we'll play that scene out in a moment.
Brandon: Great.
Julia: Brandon, I know what you want to do.
Brandon: Well, I know what I want to do, but that's not really like pressure.
Julia: Brandon, do it.
Amanda: You should. Brandon, we're doing one practical, you got to treat yourself. We need to do it.
Brandon: Woah, let me—let me think.
Julia: Brandon, I stole a bunch of Amber so that you can dig. This is what I was thinking of when I did that.
Brandon: Thank you for— for thinking of me, Julia, that's very kind.
Julia: Thank you.
Brandon: Yeah, the things that I think that will be fun/good to do would be Monster Wrangler, Backstory, or Doctor Doctor, right?
Julia: Yes, but you want to dig, Brandon.
Brandon: I do want to dig so--
Eric: There are six different times you can use dig. So if you want to knock one out, do it, you have still a five more chances to do it.
Brandon: Right.
Eric: And the—and it stays. I don't replenish this table.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: So if you want to knock one out you should.
Julia: Brandon, you should do it.
Brandon: What does Diglett sound like, Eric?
Eric and Julia: Digglet dig, digglet dig, trio, trio,
Julia: Trio, trio, trio!
Eric: Yeah, use Julia's, use Julia's.
Amanda: Wow, Julia's spokemouse has laryngitis.
Brandon: I'm gonna need all three all at once.
Julia: Great. Love it.
Brandon: I was gonna then do the-- in order to say that I was going to do that. I was gonna do the Diglett sounds, but y'all did it so perfectly so--
Julia: Oh, thank you.
Brandon: I'm gonna do dig. I'm gonna dig and roll baby.
Amanda: Yay!
Eric: Alright, let's do it right now. Let's see what happens.
Julia: Go, Brandon, go, Brandon, go Brandon, go!
Brandon: No whammy, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy. Four!
Julia: Can we describe the scene?
Eric: Yeah, please.
Julia: Oh, please.
Eric: But what is— what is this? What does this look like?
Amanda: Yeah, where are you digging Umbi?
Julia: Umbi shows up in this fucked up ship and is like, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go dig.
Brandon: Well, yeah, like I think we come to the Hold that as like a crew and Umbi is dying. So as I think as soon as he gets close enough to the dock, he drops his oar, like throws it on the ground and jumps off the ship without saying a word.
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: And then you just see him go over to like an unexplored region of the cavern and pull out from his jacket, like one of those collapsible shovels and just start digging.
Julia: I looked at Umbi goes, I'm so tired from rowing, let me do physical labor by digging.
Brandon: Exactly.
Eric: Nothing– this is like a child getting out of a car in a road trip—
Brandon: Yes!
Eric: —and complaining the entire time. And they're just—they run and pick up their Super Nintendo immediately.
Brandon: Exactly, yeah, yeah.
Julia: Yeah, yeah.
Brandon: And he's just mumbling to himself the entire time.
Eric: Okay.
Julia: What is he saying?
Brandon: He's saying–
Brandon (as Umbi): [mumbling] Just fucking stupid– god, Harold, this fucking stupid. You fucking fuck.
Eric: Alright, you started digging, throwing sand and silt over your shoulder, and eventually you— you hear a ding! As your shovel hit something metallic.
Brandon (as Umbi): Yeaaaah!
Eric: You start digging, you keep digging, he keep digging, keep digging and you see a full treasure chest, classic treasure chest. Brown with like bla— with like, metallic—
Julia: Like brass like--
Eric: Fastenings is I guess is the word, yeah.
Julia: Fastenings, yeah.
Brandon: Yeah, what do you call those?
Eric: Yeah, I’ll say fastenings.
Brandon: Adornments.
Amanda: Guys on a barrel it's called the stave, but uh I don't know about chests.
Julia: Wow. Wow.
Eric: See, Amanda's joke was too good. Now we have to keep in me not knowing how to describe a chest.
Brandon: Yup.
Eric: Now we got to describe a chest.
Brandon: I know.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: Amanda, how long is that book that you're reading?
Amanda: 841 pages on my e-reader.
Julia: What?!
Amanda: Yup.
Brandon: Oh my god.
Amanda: Yup.
Julia: That's so many pages on barrels.
Amanda: Eric, you can say like rivets or hoops.
Julia: Okay, yeah.
Eric: Okay, right. Yeah. Listen, classic chest-like brass rivets, big lock on it. You pull it out.
Brandon: You see Umbi sort of like, again like block people out from view like basketball style. So he's like, this is my chest, no one fucking touch it.
Eric: Yes, it does have a lock on it.
Brandon: Mmm, well, obviously I don't have a key so can I take the shovel—oh, what am I thinking? Can I just throw a bomb at it?
Eric: Yeah, absolutely.
Julia: Oh, damn it, Brandon.
Eric: Absolutely. [explosion sound] I like that it's still in the hole and like you see the sand go [explosion sound] like a geyser.
Brandon: I'm gonna—okay, Eric here's what I'm gonna do, this is the smart thing—
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: —Julia, because I've learned.
Julia: Thank you, Brandon.
Brandon: I am going to cover the chest up in the soil or in the—
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: —dirt and sand and then just have the lock out.
Amanda: Now we're cooking with gas.
Julia: Okay.
Amanda: Now we're cooking with bombs.
Julia: Okay, Brandon.
Eric: Hell yeah.
Brandon: Cooking with bombs is a thing we could do, Julia.
Eric: That's good.
Julia: Listen, we can talk to that restaurant guy.
Amanda: Yeah, wasn't that Emeril’s first TV show?
Julia: Cooking with bombs? Yeah.
Eric: Yeah, Cajun style. Of course you—as you dig it up, it's a little smoky now, but the lock has fallen off and the chest is ready to be opened.
Brandon: Slowly, as if he’s savoring every possible second, he's going to slowly creek open the top of this treasure chest, shaking with anticipation.
Eric: Dananana. [Video game music] You open it and there's a note at the bottom.
Brandon: And it's empty otherwise?
Eric: It is empty otherwise.
Brandon: Fuck!
Eric: With the note at the bottom that says, “you've been pranked by—
Brandon: God damn it!
Eric: Fun Mandy Potash.”
Julia: Hey, it's Fun Mandy Potash.
Brandon (as Umbi): Who the fuck is Fun Mandy Potash, are you here right now?
Brandon: I yell out to the Hold.
Eric: Yeah.
Eric (as Harold): Oh. Oh, you mean like legendary prankster and second mate to—to cri— to Captain Crimson, the Fun Mandy Potash?
Brandon (as Umbi): Are they still alive? Are they here right now?
Eric (as Harold): No, they're—no they're not here.
Eric: I want you to know this is like you said is, is Gandhi here?—
Brandon: Yeah, I know.
Eric: He just pantsed me!
Julia: Gandhi famously full of pranks.
Eric: Full of pranks.
Brandon: Well, here's the thing, Eric, I still have a nice chest.
Eric: You do, you do. Brandon, I want you to know, I want everyone else to know, I wrote nothing once on this table.
Julia: And of course, he rolled it.
Brandon: God.
Eric: Of course, he rolled it.
Julia: Because that’s Brandon luck.
Brandon: Damn it.
Amanda: Listen, every single roll after this is going to be something, baby.
Brandon: That's true.
Amanda: Might be bad, might be good, but it's gonna be something.
Brandon: That is true.
Eric: I promise you. I swear upon this show that we've been doing for half a decade. I wrote nothing once, unfortunately, it was a 4.
Brandon: I get it.
Julia: Brandon, but I think we could still use this.
Brandon: What are you thinking?
Julia: We also have a note from someone we know was one of the closest people to see the wish-granting Salmon.
Amanda: Yup.
Brandon: I have a journal too.
Julia: And we have journal.
Amanda: I bet we can read that note with some special glasses.
Brandon: Ohhhh.
Julia: That's some thinking. Because first of all, what was Fun Mandy Potash doing in the Hold?
Amanda: Good to know.
Julia: And secondly, maybe we can see where she was going on her next voyage, and maybe that'll be an indication as to where they were headed for the Infinite Lake.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: Oh, interesting. I was picturing Mandy Patinkin but as like a rutabaga.
Eric: We'll see.
Julia: Oh yeah, I don't know the gender of Fun Mandy Potash.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: I got a lady vibe, but I'm not sure.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: We can even steal something and then leave the note behind.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Mmm, that's fun, that's fun.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: You do have a—a beautiful looking chest and a uh, and a note. You do have that.
Amanda: A little singed
Julia: Yes.
Amanda: A little singed
Julia: Little singed.
Eric: Little singed.
Brandon: Umbi's going to fold the note up just like perfectly, carefully put it in his jacket, and then lovingly put some bombs in the chest.
Julia: And then rebury it?
Eric: And then rebury it?
Julia: Oh my God.
Brandon: No, not rebury, it's now my inventory.
Julia: Oh, okay.
Eric: Cute. Incredible. Alr—
Amanda: I'm picturing like a bassinet with like a blanket folding at the bottom.
Brandon: You see him walk towards the back– towards the ship just like cradling the chest, just like rocking it back and forth.
Julia (as Cammie): Umbi, what a wonderful chest, where did you get that?
Brandon (as Umbi): It's mine!
Julia (as Cammie): Okay. I was just asking a question about it.
Brandon (as Umbi): Sorry, I've just I—Harold got me worked up.
Julia (as Cammie): Oh, okay.
Amanda: Fully guilelessly, Troy goes—
Amanda (as Troy): It's really amazing how the minute you get home you have enough energy what to go digging, that's awesome.
Eric: Incredible. Alright, Ghoulia, what are we doing with this last one?
Julia: [sings] Doctor, doctor give me the news.
Brandon: [sings] Give me the news.
Julia: [sings] I got a bad case of turning you into a real doctor.
Amanda: Yay!
Eric: In my head Havana is li— Havana has his face like in a bowl of chili. And he's looking around, he’s like–
Eric (as Havana): —What? Do —you said my name?
Julia (as Cammie): Havana, I wanted to help set up your medical office here in the Hold.
Eric (as Havana): Oh, that's—thank—thanks. I like that.
Julia (as Cammie): Because I know that you lost most of your belongings when you arrived here because you didn't know the first lesson of being around pirates. But I figured you know, with some of the spare wood that we have from our ship, which now trash.
Amanda: Troy throws a couple 2 by’s over.
Julia (as Cammie): There we go, thank you, Troy. And maybe we can set up something for you and get you like to be your—or I know you're already a pirate doctor, but we can make you a real doctor.
Brandon (as Umbi): What are you gonna do, change his gender?
Julia (as Cammie): Ye--
Julia: Cammie puts a hand on to his shoulder and says—
Julia (as Cammie): Don't listen to Umbi, he's just being biased. He's just being a misandrist.
Eric (as Havana): You know I—I still gotta get used to Umbi's traditional views.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, he's very conservative for some reason.
Eric (as Havana): I know. Very socially conservative, fiscally irresponsible.
Julia (as Cammie): That is true.
[Amanda laughs heartily]
Eric: It's a joke for Amandas out there.
Julia: It's a good one. Joken. Hey, Eric, Eric, joken.
Eric: Thank you. Thank you. Sure. Okay, what subclass do you want to level up Havana?
Julia: Oh, I get to pick it, interesting.
Eric: Yes. So once again, we're reviewing. Medical so he'd be a straight-up doctor. It's—definitely it's the most vanilla, but also it does make him a little bit more-- I guess vanilla to say in so many ways. You can be naturalist is he'll be kind of crunchy like using–some figuring some of that stuff out. Religious is that he finds God and he'll become—have some cleric-bent to it. Or he can be practicing the dark arts using some real messed up doctor shit.
Julia: So I think because Cammie is the one who is using her time to level this up, I think I'm leaning towards naturalist or religious, but I want to hear the opinion of— of y'all before I make any decisions.
Brandon: Awesome. I have no strong opinion, but my thought is that if we run into Audrey, The Rotten Queen, and her crew is like all undead, then like the Black Hat Dark Arts one might be useful.
Julia: Or I would argue the opposite, which is the religious one would be useful because—
Brandon: Oh, that's true too.
Julia: —the mind magic is gonna do more to necromancy.
Brandon: Yeah. And if he is religious, Havana, then he's definitely going to become besties with Umbi and they’re gonna take him under his wing.
Julia: Maybe you stopped being so judgmental about his gender. Amanda, do you have a strong opinion about which route to take?
Amanda: You know, Julia, I think the funniest one would be either religious or black hat. [Eric laughs] Because if Havana is like here on the sea and sees death for the first time, and he's just like, oh man, and either falls like really into the idea of you know, the Planter, or, you know, like the God of the open seas, or maybe becomes super nihilist which is kind of the religion when you think about it. Or Blackhat and it's just like, yup, nothing matters. Everything's undead on the sea, deep sea creatures are wild, they don't know what's happening out here. Either one of those directions.
Julia: Okay.
Brandon: I do love those ideas, because on one, he becomes an emo kid, and the other he becomes like the preacher's wife.
Eric: So straight edge. So incre—he's so fucking staight edged.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: Okay, here's my pitch to you. Here's the scene that I want to lay out before we—we make this decision. I think Cammie, as she suggested already, is going to try to take him into a little cave to set up his quote-unquote, “doctor's practice”, right?
Eric: Sure. No, the idea is this is like Lucy's psychology shack from Peanuts.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah, it’s that but like, there's a seaweed bead door instead.
Eric: Yeah, the doctor is in, one doubloom. Yeah, for sure.
Julia: Yeah, yeah. And then Cammie's like—
Julia (as Cammie): This is how you can make money and get things other than stealing them.
Eric (as Havana): Okay. I— there's so much to learn.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, there is so much to learn. You know, when I was raised in Open Fields--
Julia: And then the entire time that Cammie is helping Havana set up, they are just talking about Open Fields religion the entire time.
Eric (as Havana): Wow. I mean, it must be nice to like-- You know, the thing I always struggle with is that, um, you know, it doesn't feel like there is— I wish there was a scoreboard somewhere of everyone's —
Eric: He hits a big bong.
Eric (as Havana): I wish there was a scoreboard of like everyone's good deeds and bad deeds, because, you know, we're all doing this, and I don't—we're all just out here trying to figure it out. And like, I feel like I'm trying to be a nice person and you’ve all been so nice to me. And I—I try to be a good friend and a good Greenfolk. But then, like, I think about the guys who threw me into the sea, and I don't think anything bad's gonna happen to them. But like the Path is so—makes sense is that if you do good things, you get to be who you are and you get to be better in the next life. But if you do bad things, then what’s coming to you, is coming to you, right?
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, yeah. And like, the best part is like, kindness is the greatest thing that one can achieve, right? And so even if you're doing kindness, and it seems like a bad thing to some people, it's actually a good thing to other people.
Brandon: Says the pirate who steals things.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, because those people don't need it, but I do. Or people that I love do.
Eric (as Havana): Yeah. And then if things are working out like you can be a— you are like a, I don't know, a soldier for justice, making sure that people get what's coming to them or what it is.
Julia (as Cammie): Kinda, yeah.
Eric (as Havana): Do you ha—do you have like any—look, I know you're—you're not part of the Path anymore, but do you have any-- Do you have like any, any texts or a book or something? Or a pamphlet I could look at?
Julia (as Cammie): I have some work by Dr. Radish Radish, would you like some of that?
Eric: No, I meant like does Cammie have like an ol— you know like even as lapsed as you are, do you have like an old Bible that you keep on your pillow? Like I'm thinking about like in Vietnam, someone has like an old soldier’s Bible—
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: — that they still have. Do you have any like— anything like that?
Brandon: Eric, Dr. Radish Radish’s, New King Radish–
Julia: No, absolutely not.
Eric: No.
Julia: Can I roll for that maybe?
Eric: Just— I just want to know. What do you— what do you—what do you think?
Julia: I'm going to roll for it because I don't know.
Eric: Okay, sure.
[dice roll]
Julia: Well, I got a 5.
Amanda: It can also be in the like, junk drawer of the Hold. Where—
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: —you know, somebody had a copy of it somewhere.
Julia: Where we found the big book of barrels.
Amanda: Like the Book of Mormon in a motel.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah. Whatever you think.
Julia: So I think Cammie's like—
Julia (as Cammie): I don't. Huh. But I did see a moldy pile of books over by the big clock. Maybe there was a copy in there.
Brandon: There's a cardboard sign that says to go to the book depository.
Eric: It's like oh, we were supposed to pick this up. Damn it, they're gonna be so mad. We— it was on the way, Jesus. Okay.
Eric (as Havana): Alright. Yeah, I'll sta—I'll um, I'll look for that. You gave me a lot to think about Cammie.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, just remember everything we eat is also the same as us.
Eric (as Havana): Huh. Yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Eric (as Havana): Ow! I dropped a hammer on my foot.
Julia (as Cammie): Oh no.
[theme]
Amanda: Hey, it's Amanda. This time of year, it's like my mental map of my neighborhood gets overlaid with another layer of the map. That includes the shady side of the block, and the blocks that are the shady just so I can keep myself a little bit cooler in the summer sun under the protection of trees. So welcome to the mid-roll. Just don't walk down Greenpoint Avenue, just don't. No trees, it's terrible. Welcome to our newest patrons, David, Stoat, and Jason, you have signed up for so much goodness by becoming patrons. You get party planning every other week, which hey, guys, by the way, the One Shot Derby: Bronte Party, Battle of the Bronte's aka, is happening this Friday. It's coming four days from now. You don't even know what you're about to get. Oh my god, it's gonna be incredible. And all patrons are able to hear it. We're gonna have a preview of course posted to the main RSS feed, but you got to be a patron to hear. So go ahead and become a patron. Be like David, be like Stoat, be like Jason, and hear the full-length battle of the Bronte's video or audio podcast. Yes, that's right, the video is available for all patrons, because y'all helped us make this one chapter be happen. Join today, listen to the Bronte's I promise you're gonna love it patreon.com/jointhepartypod. Or actually, if you've been waiting, just have an excuse to join the Patreon and the excuses that you want a mean Victorian childs tell you to do so. Here we go. [as a Victorian Mean Child] Don't be a dick, Join the Patreon patreon.com/jointhepartypod. Fuck you. This week at Multitude, have you ever wondered what life would be like on a planet different from our own or how writers create your favorite fictional worlds? Lucky for you the absolute best communicator I know Dr. Moiya McTier is here to teach you all about it. Astrophysicist and folklorist Dr. McTier explore fictional worlds by building them with a panel of expert guests, interviewing professional world builders, or reviewing the merits of worlds that have already been built. There are close to 75 episodes available of Exolore, totally for free, totally for you. If you are looking for a road trip listen, Exolore is fabulous you should really check it out. Search for Exolore, like the word explores but with an O instead of a P in your podcast app, or go to exolore pod.com. We are sponsored this week by Quest Chest from Bookwyrm Games. This is a fabulous maker of modules and TTRPG accessories. And right now they are running a Kickstarter for a Quest Chest. That is a system-agnostic TTRPG module, packed full of physical props, puzzled, narrated voice-over, music, and more. So it was both a physical and digital item. Okay, so the Quest Chest involves a full module, several sessions worth of content. You can run the first four sessions independently or tie them together since there are narrative throughlines. The physical props that this includes have like wax sealed letters, metal coins, maps, even scented candles, and tea. And I really appreciate all the sensory engagement that this comes with. The chest's digital components include fully narrated voiceover, custom music, and standard out encounters for D&D, Pathfinder, and Powered by the Apocalypse. So no matter what game system you are running, you can make it work. So listen, go to bookwyrmgames.com. That's Bookworm with a Y. B O O K W Y RMgames.com to back the project or by the previous two Quest Chests, along with the dice accessories and even D&D candy that they make. That's bookwyrmgames.com. We are also sponsored this week's Twenty-Sided Store. This is our friendly local game store who want us to remind you that it is a great time of year to support friendly local game stores near you, especially all of the LGBTQ+ makers whose work is highlighted in the stores. You can go ahead and buy zines and accessories and all kinds of games made by LGBTQ+ creators. I know Twenty Sided Store has a fabulous pride setup, they have a table. They have all kinds of ways that you can find out about more games, accessories, and zines made by queer folks in your neighborhood and across the world. They have so many wonderful things in store. And whether you are going to the local game store near you, or hey, great news, you can also just order from Twenty Sided Store and they'll ship it right to you. Packed right here in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Go ahead to twentysidedstore.com That's twenty the word sidedstore.com and use the code PIRATE for 20% off your order online. Or if you visit them in person, hey, it's great idea you should get soup dumplings at M Shanghai next door afterward. But just mentioned joining the party for 20% off. The show is also sponsored by Better Help. It is so easy to get caught up in what everyone else needs from you, and not take any time to think about what you need from yourself. I have given myself the assignment of doing something two nights a week, that last week, I went for a traditional Irish music night at a queer Irish bar that opened in my neighborhood, which is incredible. Other times I'll like go to a different place to read. And I know that I need that time to myself by myself to explore the city to just be out of my own head, to read or look around, or go to art or see a movie. And it's the thing I know makes me best for myself, but also to show up for the people around me. And it's just so easy to put that last on my list and do everything else for everyone else until I'm exhausted at the end of the day. But therapy is where I get reminded to do those things for myself. And when I could not access therapy near me, which wasn't available, which wasn't affordable. I couldn't find anybody in Brooklyn who was taking new patients, which is crazy. There's millions of people in this borough. I was able to use BetterHelp. I just filled out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist. And I was even able to switch therapists for no additional charge to find somebody who really got me and who I felt I really was able to open up with. So find more balance with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/jointheparty today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterHELP.com/jointheparty. And finally, we're sponsored by Unthinkable a fabulous podcast by friend of the show Jay Acunzo. The content creators we love seem to do something that no one else can do, right? They do it consistently and confidently. And when you see a post or a podcast, or video by that creator that you love, you're like, oh my god, only they could do this right? It could only come from them, only come from their brain. Even if you saw it almost anonymously, you'd be like, that really feels like Color Me Courtney or wow, that really feels like the Black Forger, some of the creators that I love the most and whose voices are so distinct. So figuring out how you get your creative fingerprints onto your work is an incredibly important thing, especially in this age of AI and lots, and lots of infinite kind of mediocre stuff out there. Since 2016, Unthinkable has inspired creators to ship more personal powerful work. And Jay is one of the people whose opinions and voices I trust the most about being a creator online. You got to go ahead and listen to the podcast. It's absolutely fabulous and gives you a really refreshing look at the creative process through story and sound. Click on the link in our show notes for a starter pack of stories for new listeners, or look up the show Unthinkable with Jay Acunzo, anywhere you get your podcasts. And now let's get back to the show.
Brandon: I was thinking about earlier when Eric said that there was a piece of bread in the ocean that fell off. And I was like, that means that someone's body was ground up into flour, made into bread, and then buried at sea.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): It's fucked up, huh.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda (as Troy): That's why I don't think about it. You know, that's just—that's just my main thing, is if I don't like to think about it, I just don't think about it. Now you don't think about it.
Brandon (as Umbi): Smart.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Smart.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Eric: Incredible.
Brandon (as Umbi): You're a wise young youth.
Eric: Alright, folks let's do our actions here. We're going to do Troy’s scene first of rebuilding the ship, but I would love to hear what uh—what else? What are the two other things you want to do?
Julia: Um, Eric.
Eric: Mmm.
Julia: I'm thinking about those spider silk sails that the Tessie the Storm's crew had when they were attacking us in the combat?
Eric: Sure.
Julia: Is it possible that some of that like ripped off or something while we were in combat?
Eric: Let's roll.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: [dice roll] Yeah, I rolled a 19, absitively. I think that when you were super close when the wa—with the shape water stuff.
Julia: Mmmm.
Eric: I think that maybe—the maybe the sail broke off. One of the smaller masks might have broken off in the in the— in the moment, and that can definitely break off because I also want to be the Aubergine again, so I'm also down for that. Yeah, for sure.
Julia: Yay! Thank you. I'm glad you knew exactly where I wanted to go.
Eric: Absolutely.
Julia: So, I think Cammie is going to take some of that spider silk sail, and also the giant T-shirt that Havana Tropicana got them and I'm gonna bring it to Aubergine.
Eric: Okay, wonderful, that's good. And then uh, does Umbi want to look through the glasses?
Brandon: Oh, yeah, that's fun. I'm also going to make some potions, but yeah, I like that, yeah.
Eric: Oh, you can still— you'll do that anyway. You get to do that regardless.
Julia: It's downtime stuff, you don’t have to say it.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: Yeah, you get to do that anyway in between stuff.
Brandon: Yeah, I think he's a little nervous, but I think he'll—
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: It's like, you know, it's like when your grandpa gets on Tiktok for the first time.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: He's like—
Julia: Wha—excuse me?
Brandon (as Umbi); I guess.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Hell yeah. Alright, well, let's start with Troy because I want him to le–let's get Amanda, Amanda being buff. [sings] Playing it with the boys. Troy and the hammering of two by four in the– into the ship.
Amanda: Yep. Troy has tied his tunic around his waist. All kinds of onlookers on the edge of the Hold just watching as they're in the dry dock fixing up the ship. But yeah, no, he's uh—he's going to take direction from Harold and you know, use the sort of stash of extra supplies. I think they're going to have some in the actual storage area of the ship in case it's out at sea, but probably in our quarters at the Hold have all kinds of you know, supplies sort of stashed in there in case something like this were to happen.
Eric: For sure. l like Haro— Harold is still like pulling themselves together after being blown up by one of the cannon balls from—
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Tessie the Storm's crew. So Harold is—
Amanda: I think Troy is splashing him to keep him like moisturized.
Eric: I love the idea that Harold's like on a beach chair on the side.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Just like laying out and convalescing as you're—and all the pirates are like, woo, Troy! Woo! And I think that Troy as you're doing this, you don't know what you're doing, man. You're just—
Amanda: Nah.
Eric: Nah.
Amanda: Just vibin, you know, nailing some nails, boarding some boards. You can clearly see daylight through the side of the ship, it’s not watertight, but Troy's having a great time.
Julia: He's trying and that's important.
Amanda: Yeah. Chatting with Harold.
Eric: Yeah. One of the other pirates is like—
Eric (as other pirate): Troy you look hot, get in the water.
Amanda (as Troy): Oh, thanks, man. Bros make sure bros hydrate you know?
Eric (as other pirate): Yeah, for sure. You should take off your shirt when you get in the water.
Amanda (as Troy): That's a good idea, I don't want it to get wet. I only got two shirts, you're the best.
Brandon (as other pirate): You should get more shirts.
Eric (as other pirate): Get le—no shut up, get less shirts.
Julia (as other pirate): Get rid of all your shirts, Troy.
Amanda (as Troy): But what if I'm chilly?
Julia (as other pirate): Just wear a jacket and like no shirt underneath, that's hot.
Eric (as other pirate): Yeah, no, I agree with that, whoever said that, that was a good idea.
Amanda (as Troy): Oh, yeah I'll think about that.
Eric (as other pirate): Yeah, for sure.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Eric: Troy do—can you get at the wa—Do you get in the water?
Amanda: Yes. Yes, exactly. Then Troy will get into the water, grab a little bucket, make sure Harold is moisturized and then dip into the water to cool down.
Eric: In my head, this is also like you unfurl your wings, it's like glittering in the sun and the wa—and the water. and everything.
Julia: The real anime moment.
Eric: Sure.
Amanda: Yes. Yes, it is.
Eric: Yeah, like there's che—a cherry blossoms behind it.
Amanda: Exactly. Well, because I'll be out in the sun doing all the repairs, I think this is a great time for Troy to you know, yeah, unfurl his wings. Make sure they're—they're all washed, you know, inspect them for damage, all that good stuff. And then leave them out spread wide to dry as he's reclining in the water.
Eric: Yeah. As you're splashing around by yourself in the water, you see a little bottle starts to bob off on the shore and kind of just like floats right next to you.
Amanda: Ohhh.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Troy picks it up.
Eric: You look down— Troy, you look and it, and it seems that there's some like bobbing black liquid inside of the bottle with a lit— and there's a little like, there's a little note inside that's bobbing in it. It seems like it's a water, it's like an oil skin paper. So it's kind of still like bobbing inside of there.
Amanda: Huh. Uh yeah, he'll uh, he'll wait over to the shore, sit down and uncork the bottle to fish the note out.
Eric: You want to fish the note out?
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah. Hey, you unfurl the note and the note says, get the best out of yourself, use this magic potion. Smiley face.
Julia (as Cammie): Troy, Troy, no.
Amanda (as Troy): Uh, Cammie?
Julia (as Cammie): Troy, help!
Amanda (as Troy): Oh, Cammie? Cammieeee!
Julia: Cammie appears for like with a little hammer like—
Julia (as Cammie): What's up?
Eric: Harold is like—
Eric (as Harold): If you're keeping drinks from me, just give it to me. I want it, give it to me. I need to be hydrated. I need the hyaluronic acid to make my skin nice.
Amanda: Troy splashes water only on to Harold and then—
Eric (as Harold): No, I see the drink you have in your hand, give it to me!
Amanda: Nope. Troy keeps one—
Eric (as Harold): Give it!
Amanda: —one hand on Harold algae body and then hands the bottle over to Cammie and says—
Amanda (as Troy): Cammie, I know we have not spoken specifically about me drinking unidentified potions what I found in the ocean, but it feels like a thing that if I did it, you would be disappointed and then have the tone on your voice like, Troy, why would you do this? And um, I—I don't want to do that.
Eric: Harold tries to hop up and grab it. And Harold goes–
Eric (as Harold): Ehh, I'm too weak.
Julia (as Cammie): Oooh, mystery liquid.
Julia: I'm gonna roll arcana, I guess?
Eric: Yeah, roll arcana.
Julia: [dice roll] Well, that's a 16 and now I have 4. So that's a Dirty 20.
Eric: That's a Dirty 20.
Brandon: Ohh, damn.
Eric: Hey, what does it smell like when you create second Cammie?
Julia: Umm, mmm. It smells like dirt at night right after it’s rained.
Eric: For sure, for sure. Just—would just a real—a real muddy— a real muddy smell of making, I don't know, maybe a simulacrum that can help you out in a bad situation.
Julia: Yeah, like super earthy and almost floral, but also kind of intense and deep.
Eric: Yeah, you're getting the same smell from whatever's going on in this bottle.
Julia (as Cammie): Huh. Well, it smells like shadow stuff. I think you probably can drink it.
Eric: I rolled a 15. So Harold pushed themself up from their beach chair and grabs it and imme—and immediately drinks it.
Julia (as Cammie): Harold!
Amanda (as Troy): Alright.
Eric (as Harold): It's supposed to make my skin nice!
Julia (as Cammie): That's not what it does.
Eric: And you see like Harold stands straight up, which you've never seen before, because Harold usually kind of just like in a lump, like of algae just like very wide.
Brandon: Harold’s 12 feet tall.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Harold— Harold is like a square four by four feet.
Julia: Oh, I don't like that.
Eric: Harold stands up stock straight. Their eyes go black, and then you see that like, I don't know if you've ever picked up some like moss that's growing on the side of a rock before like if you're hiking in the— in the forest. When you pick it up there's like dirt underneath. There's like a little bit of loam something that they're using to like attach itself. Botanists out there, you know what I'm talking about. But you—you all kind of understand what I'm saying, right?
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric: And I think that you see like almost the dirt or this—this like backing that's on Harold come forward. Like slowly moving a transparency forward on like Photoshop or something.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: You're moving it forward.
Amanda: Like a depth surfacing to the surface.
Eric: Yeah, like the depth is moving forward and then he like pushes out through Harold. And then there's two Harold's, one that's green and one that's brown and they both collapse into a heap.
Amanda (as Troy): Harold!
Julia (as Cammie): Huh.
Amanda: And Troy's gonna like with wet arms try to like scoop up both of them.
Julia (as Cammie): Did we need more than one Harold? He was already so much already. Hmm.
Eric: Green Harold goes—
Eric (as Harold): Thank you, Troy. This is all I've ever wanted is—
Amanda (as Troy): You're gonna—
Eric (as Harold): —be in your— be in your arms.
Amanda (as Troy): If you're going to ask for mouth-to-mouth again we've talked about why that's not helpful for you as moss.
Eric (as Harold): I'm choking, help me.
Amanda (as Troy): No, no.
Eric (as Harold): [ coughs]
Eric: And then the brown Harold goes—
Eric (as Brown Harold): [coughs] I'm coming to life, someone breathe bro—wha—air to me, using your mouth.
Amanda (as Troy): Okay.
Amanda: Troy gives a little kiss to the forehead of the brown Harold.
Eric: This Harold is a brown and silty and like almost like mud and dirt is coming together. And the Harolds are like—
Eric (as Brown Harold): Oh, it looks like there's a —there's a hole in the ship. I think I can just patch this thing— I can just patch this thing up.
Julia (as Cammie): Thank you.
Amanda (as Troy): That will be super helpful, do you want another kiss?
Eric (as Brown Harold): Uh yes plea—yes, please.
Amanda: Troy kisses him on each cheek.
Eric (as Brown Harold): Thank you.
Eric: And then the silty Harold kind of like bounce over to the ship and then starts pulling it together, like slaps themselves on the side of the ship and then starts to pull the whole thing together. Like a— like almost clamps that start to-- kind of molds it into another face is like—
Eric (as Brown Harold): Alright, Troy, I just need you to uh— to hammer some of—just hammer some of the wood in there, we'll—we'll get a little damp so that a it has a nice curve, and that will make this thing looking nice.
Amanda (as Troy): Love it.
Amanda: And Troy and bounce over to lift up some more boards. And I'm picturing Troy almost like imagine if you're trying to sort of put the lid on a shoe box and Troy just like plops it down diagonally, and then the lid like rights itself and slots in properly, that's what the—the new Harold is like fitting each board so that it ends up being watertight.
Julia: That's also a great question. I think Cammie's gonna be like—
Julia (as Cammie): Are you also Harold, or would you like a new name?
Eric (as Brown Harold): Ohh, that's a good question. I hadn't thought about that. Harold, would it be weird if we had the same name?
Eric (as Harold): Absolutely. Pick another one, it's mine!
Julia (as Cammie): I have a suggestion.
Eric (as brown Harold): Please.
Julia (as Cammie): How about Siltvio? Like Silvio but silt.
Eric (as brown Harold): That's—
Julia (as Cammie): And we can call you Sil.
Eric (as Sil): Sil… Sil, Sil. I like it.
Julia (as Cammie): Okay!
Eric (as Sil): I'm Sil, and that's Harold and we're—and we're def— and we're not the same person.
Julia: Yay!
Eric: Incredible. So now bing bang boom, you have a new crew member, this is Sil.
Julia: Weee!
Brandon and Amanda: Yay!
Eric: Shipwright, who can help—who can help to patch holes in the ship if you have one damage, kind of hold it together so you don't have any problems. And also they kind of will do that while Harold is— is kind of running the ship, Sil will be doing repairs and stuff on the fly.
Julia: Hell yeah.
Brandon: Is this a time where I might be able to use an arcana check or should I just do that later on— on this kind of magic that's happening?
Eric: Sure. What do you think? Yeah, give me a check.
Julia: I like the idea that Umbi shows up more like, we have a new crew member!
Amanda: And Umbi's like, I have some questions.
Brandon: I think he's seen this from afar and he's like—
Brandon (as Umbi): What the fuck? Am I gonna step on this boat with this new thing?
Amanda: I can't believe this voice is less taxing than Les'.
Brandon: It really is, I don't know why. Well, see what happened is I rolled the dice and then went to the edge of my like dice bag and then rolled back and them landed on Nat 1, so—
Julia: Brandon, you say you have good dice, why don't you use them?
Brandon: No you say that, Julia.
Julia: Well no, I say, Brandon, are those your good dice, and then you say no.
Brandon: Yeah, but I don't ever change dice, they're just— there's I just had two D20s here.
Eric: Hey, Umbi what do you think happened here?
Brandon: Oh, boy. I think um — I think Umbi doesn't understand the botany, the biology of algae and he's just like—
Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, this must be the natural life cycle of algae.
Eric: I love that. Yeah, it's just like, oh, algae, obviously. Oh, does um, what do you call it, when you just like create a pod of yourself coming off of your head?
Brandon: Umm.
Julia: Mitosis?
Eric: Yeah, Mi— it's just mitosis. Umbi's like mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. Maybe you're father and son, or maybe you're twins, I don't know.
Amanda: Who can say?
Julia: Who can say?
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Well, they're a member of the crew now.
Eric (as Sil): I'm Sil, who are you?
Brandon (as Umbi): I'm Umbi, what up?
Eric (as Sil): Nothing your—your ship looks like garbage.
Brandon (as Umbi): That was intentional, I know.
Eric (as Sil): Oh, so I should do a bad job.
Brandon (as Umbi): I mean like, make it look like it was you know, if you don't mind.
Amanda (as Troy): Go—this is our thing here on the Sea Whip, good on the inside, bad on the outside.
Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah, that.
Julia (as Cammie): Structurally sound, but aesthetically displeasing.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Like a pirate!
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah!
Eric (as Harold): Like me when I wake up in the morning.
Eric (as Sil): I get that, that's okay I got it.
Amanda: Troy looks between them like, woah.
Eric (as Sil): I understand.
Brandon (as Umbi): So are they— hey, Troy, Cammie.
Amanda (as Troy): Whaddup?
Brandon (as Umbi): Do they like kiss? Or are they like friends? Or are they like family?
Amanda (as Troy): I kiss them.
Julia (as Cammie): What a weird question to ask first whether or not they kiss.
Brandon (as Umbi): You know what I mean?
Julia (as Cammie): Do I?
Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah. Are they like—
Julia (as Cammie): Okay.
Brandon (as Umbi): Are they— did they like meet each other?
Julia (as Cammie): Right like you and Raz.
Amanda (as Troy): No, umm.
Brandon (as Umbi): No.
Amanda (as Troy): Sil—Sil, just kind of came out of Harold. So it was— it was kind of like, you know, like a budding, forking situation.
Brandon (as Umbi): Twin thing situation.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Cool, cool, cool, cool.
Amanda (as Troy): But then I think the reason why I think he is just like Harold is he also pretended to choke so I would give him mouth-to-mouth. So I gave him a little kiss on the forehead, but then he started and then he needed another kiss on each cheek. So it's been three kisses for Sil, and then I'm gonna get Harold three later, so he doesn't feel jealous.
Brandon (as Umbi): You know, you don't have to indulge that right, Troy?
Amanda (as Troy): Huh?
Brandon (as Umbi): What?
Eric (as Harold): It sounds like you've never had siblings before.
Brandon (as Umbi): I didn't. I was an only Umbi.
Brandon: That’s not true
Julia: Don’t you famously have siblings?
Amanda: That’s not true, you have like five siblings!
Brandon: Yeah, I know he has many siblings. I just wanted to say only Umbi.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric (as Harold): It sounds like you had one child you loved more than the others.
Amanda: And later Troy will give Harold three kisses on the forehead before he goes to sleep.
Brandon: Awww.
Julia: Nice. Nice.
Eric: Incredible. Alright, Cammie goes back to Aubergine's Fashion House of Fashion.
Amanda: Yay!
Julia: Cammie walks in goes—
Julia (as Cammie): Aubergine, my greatest and oldest friend, how are you?
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh mademoiselle tea witch. It's just so nice to see you after so long.
Julia (as Cammie): I know it's been so long. I think like three whole days.
Eric (as Aubergine): I cannot. I sometimes I just stay inside here. I do not know what is day or what is night. I have heard--
Julia (as Cammie): That's true and the clock's all fucked, so.
Eric (as Aubergine): I look at the clock and I say, life there's nothing but broken clock.
Julia (as Cammie): That sounds like a movie. Like a sad black-and-white movie.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh, oh you— you mis—yeah you missed all the new wave puppet shows that happened.
Julia (as Cammie): They're all in black and white now?
Eric (as Aubergine): They're all black and white. I don't know where they found so many black socks.
Brandon: Of course, Aubergine is a director at the Puppet Playhouse. Why didn't we think of that before?
Julia: Yes. Of course, that's his downtime activity.
Eric (as Aubergine): Death in Venice, which is one of the islands in the Great Salt Sea.
Julia (as Cammie): I haven't been there, but it sounds lovely.
Amanda (as Aubergine): There's a lot of peaches, it is relevant to the plot.
Eric (as Aubergine): So do you have any materials for me that I can use to make a wonderful new maybe sturdier outfit for such a dazzling tea witch such as yourself?
Julia (as Cammie): I have brought you some amazing materials to work with. First off, this incredible piece.
Julia: And it's the giant T-shirt.
Eric (as Aubergine): What does it say, why does it say ‘my husband brought me to Book Depository, and only thing keeping me from divorce’?
Julia (as Cammie): I don't know but it feels like it has a story behind it, which is why I'm so invested in it.
Eric (as Aubergine): It does. It is a time-space relationship. I'm not one of those Book Depository adults, I do not get it.
Brandon (as Aubergine): What does it say? I will murder my wife for the insurance money.
Eric (as Aubergine): If my husband does not take me here, I will turn this into True Crime podcast.
Julia (as Cammie): I will say I did enjoy myself as a full-ass adult at the Book Depository so—
Eric (as Aubergine): I just do not get it, I spend my time watching black and white puppet show, it is different thing.
Julia (as Cammie): Understandable.
Brandon: Oh my god, did Cammie's got a bunch of Bookie bars?
Julia: No, no.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Eric (as Aubergine): Did you see one of those secret Bookies?
Julia (as Cammie): I saw the oldy times one.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh, that is rare I hear.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Brandon: The hidden Bookies, the hidden Bookies.
Julia (as Cammie): Oh yeah, the hidden Bookies were all over the place.
Eric: God I love it. I love the idea, it's just like a square.
Amanda: Sombrero Donald Duck.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): And you know what we got the specialty Researchers Delight too, the one with the little rose head bear thing.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh I had yeah, I ever heard about that, it's interesting. Alright, this is I mean… depressing. This is depressing. I cannot do anything with this, I'm sorry. Do you have anything else?
Julia (as Cammie): Oh, okay, well, I did also pull this off of a ship. I don't know if it's going to be any use to you.
Julia: And she takes out the spider silk.
Eric (as Aubergine); Ohh, interesting.
Julia (as Cammie): Oh I thought you're gonna be much more excited about the t-shirt
Eric (as Aubergine): No, no, I do not know this... You know this is interesting, it's utilitarian, this is utilitarian grade professional. I haven't seen anything like this since before Cascade and it is quite interesting.
Julia (as Cammie): You can remember from when the Cascade, I thought you don't remember anything of your past life?
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh no not mine, you see, I have studied this. My understanding from all this experience I have—I must have study that the best fashion houses in entire—in entire Verda Stello. And various things in all the different countr– in various places, various countries. It is uh—you are both artist and historian at the same time as it expresses itself. For example this t-shirt, it expresses death of society, but this!
Julia (as Cammie): What?
Eric: Aubergine takes out look glass— once again glasses with like-- it's a monocle with like 20 magnifying glasses on it.
Julia: Wow!
Brandon: That's what he puts on.
Amanda: Nice.
Eric (as Aubergine): Like the material, this— this was made by a spi— spider bu— bug folk, where did you get it?
Julia (as Cammie): Oh, I took it off a ship that was trying to attack us and the ship belonged to Tessie the Storm. So she was a spider folk.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh, another reason why I do not go to Book Depository. Incredible, I've— I've never seen someone come back. I—I think I can make something of this. What kind of piece—
Brandon: What? You’ve never seen someone come back?
Eric (as Aubergine): I have-- I've never seen anyone tussle—Tessil with the Storm and come back.
Julia (as Cammie): I like that Tessil because it's Tessie.
Eric (as Aubergine): It's uh—yes you see. It's portmanteau, combining two words. It's from word it's— the word portmanteau actually is word it means something—
Julia (as Cammie): Is a portmanteau?
Eric (as Aubergine): No, i—it—
Amanda: The hand luggage.
Eric: Yeah.
Eric (as Aubergine): It means when you get pulled under the waves and you cannot come out it's cause you are port on the tow.
Brandon: You fa—a man falls off the port that is undertow
Eric (as Aubergine): Yeah, exactly.
Amanda: Yeah exactly, yeah, yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): Towed under the port. Yes, I understand completely.
Eric (as Aubergine): What kind of piece are you looking for here?
Julia (as Cammie): What about a beautiful cloak?
Eric (as Aubergine): Hat.
Julia (as Cammie): Hat? I have a hat.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh, I just—
Julia (as Cammie): You want me to have a nicer hat?
Eric (as Aubergine): Well I can improve hat. I thought we were about to say same thing at same time.
Julia: It’s so funny. I really like the idea that oh, we're gonna say the same thing at the same time, but I also really liked the, but no that happened there.
Eric (as Aubergine): Is it oh, I thought we’re on the same face. I just I can saw you know, I'm most making cloaks for various pirates here in the Hold. But you're the only one with hats. Hats, I've never get—I never get to work on headwear.
Julia (as Cammie): Famously I am the only one with a hat here, canonically.
Eric (as Aubergine): Oh you know, tricorner don't count.
Julia (as Cammie); It doesn't count.
Eric (as Aubergine): It's a diamond dozen you can— you barrel washes up on shore and the tricorner the hat--
Amanda: Troy goes—
Amanda (as Troy): Barrels?
Julia (as Cammie): It takes a real you know, it takes a Greenfolk to rock a cool hat like mine. However, I did want an item that would stop me from being stabbed as easily.
Eric (as Aubergine): Ah, you can--
Julia (as Cammie): And that's typically don’t stop you from being stabbed or easily.
Eric (as Aubergine): Yeah.
Brandon: You should stick your head down.
Eric (as Aubergine): Form-- function over form, death of the fashion. Okay, I'll see what I can do. Alright.
Eric: And then just like in fro—
Julia (as Cammie); I like my hat.
Eric: —in front of you, Aubergine like has a grumpy face on.
Julia (as Cammie): Oh, no.
Eric: And just like throws together a cloak in like two minutes.
Eric (as Aubergine): Alright, cloak protect you from being stabbed.
Brandon: Julia, he's French, she's always going to be surly, it's fine.
Julia (as Cammie); Okay, tha—thank you. Aubergine, if I bring you back another fantastic piece of fabric, I will make sure that you can make a hat next time.
Eric (as Aubergine): Maybe I'll make it for someone else who likes hats.
Julia (as Cammie): No!
Eric (as Aubergine): I don't know. Troy would look nice with hat. Umbi little-- like little hats so it makes them look like fun old man.
Julia (as Cammie); But—but I want to be the only one with a hat.
Eric (as Aubergine): It's just how fashion goes. Such as life.
Julia (as Cammie): I'm sad now.
Eric (as Aubergine): Now you're + 1 AC. Get out of my sight.
Amanda: Yay!
Julia: Yay! Now my AC is 11.
Brandon: 11, Jesus Christ, Julia.
Julia: I'm not very dexterous.
Brandon: Hey, Eric, your French accent was fucking great.
Amanda: Yeah, it was.
Julia: Very good.
Eric: Here's-- for DMs out there, don't try it earlier, just see what happens.
Julia: Just wing it.
Amanda: Stay ready so you don't have to get ready.
Eric: You stay ready, so you don't have to get ready. Alright, Umbis’ gonna look at some stuff.
Julia: Umbis?
Amanda: Yay!
Eric: Alright, folks. Let's uh, yeah, all of you can be in the scene together, this just a Umbi needs to wear glasses.
Brandon: Well he also needs to wear the glasses. He has to wear glasses and the glasses.
Amanda: His readers.
Julia: Right.
Amanda: Plus.
Brandon: Right, right. Yeah.
Julia: You got the double glasses situation.
Eric: Yeah, maybe Umbi has a little hat to make him super jaunty. I don't know, I'm just–
Julia: Not yet.
Eric: I don't know. Alright, yeah.
Julia: If he wants that he can spend time with Aubergine and get fucking roasted.
Brandon: Can you imagine Umbi getting into a conversational tête-à-tête with a Frenchman.
Julia: Bad, it would end badly.
Amanda: A lot of comedic potential.
Eric: I didn't think anything would be funnier than Umbi talking to himself, but we might just need to do it—
Amanda: It might be—it might be good.
Eric: —if we had more time. We might just spend some time doing it. Bonus episode, 30 minutes, Aubergine and Umbi, is like fucking My Dinner with Andre.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Enemies to lovers situation.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: Ooohh, alright, alright. Amanda, write it for us.
Eric: 30k words enemies to lovers.
Amanda: Slow burn.
Eric: Slowest burn. Slowest burn. They both work at the post office in this situation.
Amanda: They don't even touch hands until 80,000 words in.
Julia: Wow!
Brandon: Umbergine.
Eric: Um—Umbergine. Absitively.
Amanda: There it is.
Julia: It kind of works.
Eric: So yeah, I think what are we looking at specifically here?
Brandon: Would you say that there's anything on the journal and any entry in the Journal of Fun Mandy Potash that would be like, more relevant or more close in time than this note? Because like the mystery of like, why she was in the Hold and like what their next journey off the dock is enticing. But if there’s anything more relevant in the journal, I want to do that.
Eric: That's a good question. I think that all of you can look at this, and we'll decide if you want to roll for anything. But I think that like the three of you are like reviewing what happened, you're looking over your stuff. And you finally open up the journal from Fun Mandy Potash. And you see like the first—so there's one entry in the front that's like—
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Dear diary, I'm Fun Mandy Potash and this is where I'm gonna put all my thoughts and things about my time here on the ship. Here's one thing that I did, Crimson didn't like it when I slit—when I opened up the container of salt. But I did it anyway and—
Brandon (as Umbi): [laughs] That's a good prank, I love it.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): —but I did it anyway. I don't have a lot of time for me to write in my journal, but I will try my best to do so.
Brandon (as Umbi): Can you fall in love with a book? [laughs]
Eric: So that means you look through—
Amanda (as Troy): Yes.
Eric: —you look— As you continue to look through, the handwriting gets messier and messier and messier. The first entry is the only one you can read. Every word you're like, what does it say? Is this—
Brandon (as Umbi): I get it, her eyesight must have been failing.
Eric: Yeah. Of course yeah, for sure. Or just like, you know, she was writing too quickly. Some of the pages are water stained, there's blood in variou— on various ones of them, et cetera, et cetera. So I think that the only entry you can see, you can read traditionally is this first one. Setting the scene that this is in fact a journal establishing all this stuff. This is not to say you can't hop in. However, that's all you can glean from reading it in this way.
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah. Probably similarly to how when I jumped into the news article, we had kind of mumbled parts where it had faded. So I think it'll still give us a lot of information if we jump in, even if we don't get the entire picture. You know what I mean?
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Correct.
Julia: Excellent.
Brandon: What do you think, Amanda?
Amanda: Yeah, I concur. I think you can read whatever you feel like. My only thought is that maybe the last journal entry gives us some context as to where they were and what happened when they died or lost the journal and that—
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: —could be really interesting.
Julia: Absolutely.
Brandon: Yeah, that was kind of my thought, too. It's just like hopping into the last page. Yeah. Should we just try that?
Julia: Yeah, let's do it.
Amanda: I'm down. Your action, so I think it's your call, but I'm—I'm down with that.
Brandon: Okay. Umbi's gonna turn to the four of his crewmates now, five, six total.
Julia: Oh, yeah.
Amanda: Havana, Sil, Harold.
Julia: Wow, we’ve like doubled our crew.
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: Almost.
Brandon: Turn to his five crewmates and say,
Brandon (as Umbi): I'm not sure about this but there comes a point in every old Greenfolk life when they need to experience what the youth are doing, and that's reading.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): That is true. Do you want some pointers from Troy and I, because we've all done this before.
Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah, please.
Julia (as Cammie): Troy?
Brandon (as Umbi): Am I gonna get like motion sick?
Amanda (as Troy): No. So you're gonna fall in there. You're gonna say to yourself, this is not how anybody described reading, and if they did, I would have read a lot sooner. But just remember, you can always take off the glasses and—and then you'll—you'll be back. So like when you're in there, it is going to be like you don't have any glasses on, but when you put up your— your hands to your face, like this—
Amanda: And then Troy presses his hands against his eyes and goes, oh, I can't see and then puts him on the side of his head.
Amanda (as Troy): You can take off the glasses and then that’ll get you out of there.
Brandon (as Umbi): Thank you, Troy, that was very instructive.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Julia (as Cammie): And my suggestion is, you know the existential fear of being known and knowing where you belong in the universe and you know, your place there and where you come from?
Brandon (as Umbi): Mmm, not exactly, I'm pretty confident.
Julia (as Cammie): Okay. Well, I was gonna say that it's like that and you just have to embrace it, so
Brandon (as Umbi): I love it, I d—
Julia (as Cammie): Okay.
Brandon (as Umbi): Hey, Cammie, I was just joking with you, of course.
Julia (as Cammie): Wonderful. Wonderful.
Brandon (as Umbi): Sometimes I know I don't get the joke and myself, I just say it, you know.
Julia (as Cammie): Mmmm.
Amanda (as Troy): Troy's doing a bicep curl with like, a log. He doesn't know what you're talking about.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah. Yeah.
Brandon: Like a—like a mast pole.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Alright.
Brandon: And Umbi puts on the glasses and a la Reading Rainbow or I guess uh—
[Julia hums the Reading Rainbow theme song in the background]
Eric: Blue's Clues.
Brandon: Blue's Clues, yeah, that's what I'm thinking of.
Eric: In all of my notes I've been writing Blue Skidoo, so yes.
Julia: Great.
Brandon: Umbi, Blueskidoos into this book.
Eric: For sure. Yeah, you put on the glasses, everything looks incredibly blurry except for the book. So you're jumping into the journal?
Brandon: Yeah, the last page. I assume I'll probably get like sort of an impressionist painting of a thing, but we'll find out.
Eric: Oh, you're jumping into the last page?
Brandon: Yeah, with writing on it, of course.
Eric: Okay, for sure. Yeah, for sure. Yes, you look down and you look see just like this—this like doctor's prescription handwriting down on the last entry of the journal.
Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, so she was a woman.
Eric: Yes, exactly. As you— as you jump in, you feel like the ground kind of go out from below you, and then immediately you fall on your hands and knees and slam into a small bedroom on a ship.
Brandon (as Umbi): Ow, my hip.
Eric: For those of you who have been on a cruise before I think that this could be something like a small bedroom there, is like they try to make it as bedroom-y as possible. But you—you were like, oh, I'm looking down and it's the wood of a hull of a ship and there is swelling everywhere.
Julia: Is it like an interior cabin?
Eric: Yes, it's an interior cabin, correct.
Julia: Okay.
Eric: But like a full-size bed in the corner with like some incredibly ornate bedspread on it and like 20 pillows. You can see that there's like a cabinet with like all these jewels overflowing on it. In the way that people throw their clothing on the floor, and Fun Mandy Potash is at throne their treasure. And you'll see there's a little desk in a chair where you are looking over and you see that there is a sack of white pearl onions that are— it's kind of leaned over.
Brandon (as Umbi): My favorite snack!
Eric: With a tri-corner hat.
Julia: Oh no, it's a person.
Eric: With a tri-corner hat cocked over to the side, a sho—
Julia: A jauntily.
Eric: Yeah, jauntily cocked to the side, a shock of red hair, a cutlass in each one of her sides, and some incredibly dark black velvet boots. As you hear—
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Dear diary, Crimson doesn't want me writing in this anymore because therefore it can be used as evidence if the world government comes and gets me. But I think I'm just cataloging all the things. Good thing I— my handwriting has gotten terrible so no one could read this other than me.
Eric: As you're hearing this, you're also looking around and yes, everything is a little smooshed like an impressionist painting. Even on your hands and knees, it is hard for you to hold any sort of like balance not only because the— you are on a ship that seems to be speeding forward, slamming against the surf as charging but bad handwriting certainly doesn't help.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): I'm going to work on my best prank yet, but I'm only going to do that after we find the second key. Kisses diary, love Fun Mandy Potash, it me.
Brandon: Oh, they found the first key.
Julia and Amanda: Ooohh.
Julia: Okay. So they know where the first key is, this is interesting.
Amanda: Umbi, you can talk to them.
Julia: Oh, yeah, you can interact with them. I learned that from when I did mine.
Brandon: Oh, that's true.
Julia: I forgot about that.
Brandon: Umbi's gonna stand up as best he can and announce himself in the room.
Brandon (as Umbi): Hello, I am Sir Umbis of Crimson Crew II. I have come to—
Julia: What?
Brandon (as Umbi): —retrieve the key cause uh— we need it. Can I—where'd you get it? Can I have it?
Julia: That's a great lie, Brandon. Just want to say, Umbi? Great at lying.
Eric: Mandy spins around it turns around to you and says—
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): I think I know everyone on the ship in my own ship, especially in my own diary entry. And you don't seem like anyone I've seen or pranked which is how I remember people. So you're gonna have to explain to me who you are and what you're doing here.
Brandon (as Umbi): Cabin cleaning crew. Where's the— where's the key?
Julia: Oh, Brandon.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Listen, I don't keep the key on me. What I—I have is if you could see anything about my whole-- myself or this entire situation, no one thinks I have responsibility.
Julia: I like that she’s Jean-Ralphio from Parks & Rec
Eric: Yeah, dude.
Julia: Yeah, I’m so about it.
Brandon (as Umbi): That's fine. How'd you find the key is what I'm actually after you know?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Oh, okay, okay, okay, which one of you—
Brandon (as Umbi): Woah. No, that wouldn't make sense because they would have it. This did happen.
Brandon: He says out loud.
Brandon (as Umbi): So, where did you die and leave the key, I guess is the question.
Julia: Well!
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): I didn't die. I'm gonna live forever, everyone knows that. There's a whole point of being a pirate, especially joining up Crimson. What's the point of being on Crimson Larceny’s Crew if you're not going to live forever?
Brandon (as Umbi): Where do you keep the key?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Oh, in the—yeah in the hold locked under lock and key, which is pretty funny when you think about it.
Brandon (as Umbi): The Hold like the volcano thing that's hollow, that one? Or do you have a different hold?
Eric: Oh, no like on the ship. You call it the Hold? I call it the ho— I call it the hot springs where I get to work out all of the problems I have on my back.
Brandon (as Umbi): Well, that's what I was gonna ask because like the Hold can be a generic term for a thing like, hold you. But you mean like the hold on the boat?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, it's a—it's in the thing over there, you know.
Eric: They—as she's gesturing like with her chin. She was like,
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Yeah, over there. Yeah, on the place over there.
Brandon (as Umbi): Co—are there any immediate dangers that are about to befall this ship that you understand?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): I don't know. I hope not.
Brandon (as Umbi): Great. Where are we right— right now?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): We're heading towards the Divine Labyrinth of course.
Julia: [gasps] The Divine Labyrinth.
Brandon (as Umbi): Cool. And how many clicks or nautical miles away do you think you are?
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): They don't trust me with that. I'm sorry, I wish I could—
Julia: You're the second mate.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Yeah. Oh, my—my responsibility is to fun. I don't know some number of clicks, less than ten.
Brandon (as Umbi): Great. Thank you for not questioning why there's an old man in your room suddenly.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): We're in your—we're in your reading thing. I like your glasses, they're neat.
Brandon (as Umbi): Thank you.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): I wish I—I wish I had time to read but I was too busy doing pranks.
Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, by the way, the one prank you did where you—where you hid a treasure inside of a hollowed-out volcano, fuck you.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Oh, I got you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Oh, no. Uh no, fuck you.
Brandon (as Umbi): Uh no, fuck you.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potash): Uh no, fuck you.
Brandon: I think I'm gonna take off the glasses now.
Amanda: Great.
Julia: Good job, Brandon, that was great.
Amanda: Do we see what Umbi's saying as he's interacting?
Julia: Yeah, do we hear all the words that he's saying?
Eric: No, no, no.
Julia: We’re like, why does he keep telling her fuck you?
Eric: No. I guess it's a good question, I don't know what—what it looks like when they're gone. I think its—
Amanda: I think it’s in the mental space probably.
Brandon: Probably just the eyes blank kinda.
Eric: I like the idea that like maybe you're in there, and now you're just like an out— there's just like an outline of you.
Julia: Like someone sketched Umbi?
Eric: Yeah, yeah.
Julia: That's cool.
Eric: It's like, if this was a cartoon, we like moved back three stages of design and it's just like a sketch of Umbi standing there, because the three—the two of you haven't done this around anyone else. So I think this might be the first time seeing it.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: That's pretty dope. I love that.
Amanda: Cool.
Brandon: As I'm like being sucked out of the book, does the ship like hit a rock and take on water or something?
Eric: I think Fun Mandy Potash punches you in the face, and knocks your glasse—knocks your glasses off.
Brandon: She just throws one of her onions at me.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric (as Fun Mandy Potsh): Hey, you're gonna be nicer to me about my pranks, or I'll show you Vidalia and Spanish.
Julia: That is incredible. I love it. We got to ask around about the Divine Labyrinth now.
Brandon: I relay all that information to my crewmates.
Brandon (as Umbi): Well, I guess it's, you know, close to the labyrinth, so that's should probably be our next destination I guess?
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah. Maybe we can—when we go to the puppet show tonight, we can ask the rest of the pirates if anyone's heard of the Divine Labyrinth or where that might be.
Brandon (as Umbi): Love it.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): Maybe we should like, keep it chill, though you know, so they don't go there first somehow.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.
Brandon (as Umbi): You know. Or we asked him and kill him whatever.
Julia (as Cammiei): Or you know.
Amanda (as Troy): People tend to listen to me if I talked to them on my shirt is off and then not remember what they said later, so I try that.
Brandon (as Umbi): That—
Julia (as Cammie): That's a great idea, Troy.
Brandon (as Umbi): Troy, that's a fucking great idea.
Julia (as Cammie): We love that for you. Really embracing your— your energy that you bring to the team.
Amanda (as Troy): Thanks.
Eric: Yeah. I think as you—as all of you are going out to the puppet show, and Sil is very confused why you get all of your news via puppet show.
Julia (as Cammie): Mmm. It's the best way to do it.
Eric (as Sil): But why—but why puppets, I don't get it?
Julia (as Cammie): Because they're easy to make and they express all of the emotions of a Greenfolk.
Eric (as Harold): It's high art.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, especially when it's in black and white, like Aubergine directs.
Eric (as Harold): Oh, is he dire—is he— is this one of Aubergine’s ones again? I hate French films.
Julia (as Cammie): No, I think this is the Daily News one.
Eric: Oh, that will come up with Jon Stewart, who I assume is a bowl of vegetable stew. We'll come back to that.
Julia: Oh, we haven't met anyone who's like a cooked dish of--
Brandon: Who’s a cooked crop.
Eric: Yeah, I was thinking, I was thinking about that. As you're walking up, you see Orello bounding up to you wearing like a mailman uniform.
Amanda: Uh-oh.
Eric: And like a jaunty hat with a big feather and be like—
Eric (as Orello): Sorry, I haven't gotten the chance to give you your mail yet. You've been gone for so long. Ho—how was the—how was Book Depository Island?
Julia (as Cammie): I—I would say better than Esca where we weren't immediately tried to be killed, but—
Brandon (as Umbi): Pretty quickly.
Julia (as Cammie): —not—yeah, not terrible. All things considered, Orello, could have been worse.
Brandon (as Umbi): I got this dope t-shirt.
Eric (as Orello): Hold on. Hold on, hold it up to the light I can't see.
Brandon (as Umbi): Here you go.
Eric: And he takes out like an opera glasses, and puts in front of his face. It's like—
Eric (as Orello): Why does it say my entire marriage’s bedrock is on annual trips to the Book Depository Island on this shirt.
Brandon (as Umbi): Because that's my marriage. Parapapayataratatatayatata tip hat.
Julia: Cammie leans over to Troy and said—
Julia (as Cammie): I told you they were married.
Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.
Eric (as Orello): I'm so glad I don't have to deal with straight people problems. Okay.
Brandon: Straight fruit.
Eric: Straight fruit, yes straight fruit problems.
Eric (as Orello): Well, I have all of your mail.
Julia (as Cammie): We get mail?
Eric (as Orello): Well when you have mail then you get mail.
Brandon (as Umbi): What?
Amanda (as Troy): Ohhh.
Julia (as Cammie): Why have I never gotten mail?
Eric (as Orello): I don't have time to unlock that tragic backstory. I'll do it another time. Alright, I do have one for Troy Riptide.
Amanda (as Troy): Whoa, for me?
Julia (as Cammie): Who is it from Troy, who's it from?
Eric: Orello—Orello grabs the envelope back and says—
Eric (as Orello): Troy Riptide, I'm not good at-- I don’t know if you can tell, but I don't ha— I'm not detail oriented.
Amanda (as Troy): Thank you.
Amanda: And Troy grabs the letter and it's like—
Amanda (as Troy): —it's like, listen, I know, I know. I make a lot of jokes about books, but like when you think about it, it's just like one page of like the—the book of my life and it's like, it's here, it's like right here sent to me with my name on it.
Brandon (as Umbi): It's like a personalized book.
Julia (as Cammie): It's true.
Amanda (as Troy): Do you guys mind if I like take like a personal moment and like go like sit over there and like read— read my first letter?
Brandon (as Umbi): No, do it.
Julia (as Cammie): Yeah!
Amanda (as Troy): Thanks.
Eric (as Orello): I thought it was gonna get a preview before the puppet show. Fine!
Eric: As Orello stomps off.
Eric (as Orello): What's the part of being a mailman if you don't hear about mail? It's illegal to open it. Come on! Fuck!
Brandon: Classic Orello.
Amanda: And yeah, I think Troy is gonna, like hold the letter really close to his chest and go to like, I'm picturing sort of like an outdoor amphitheater, and he's gonna sort of like sit in the back corner and open the letter.
Julia: Umbi and Cammie's just like have a conversation while you're gone.
Brandon: Talking about Star Wars.
Eric: Hey, hey, did you like Mandalorian Season Two, I thought it was pretty good.
Julia (as Cammie): I love the baby.
Brandon: Puppe--, puppelorian, pup—puppetlorian.
Julia (as Cammie): I love that little green— I love that little green sock that they use for the puppet.
Brandon: I was just thinking that it was funny that Amanda pitched an auditorium because I just pictured a shitty piece of shit Peanuts stage with like seven logs in front of it.
Eric: I also thought that and I think that we're all talking about the same thing.
Amanda: Yes.
Julia: It's like a Renfair stage.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah absolutely.
Amanda: Yeah. Well, he's in— he's— he's on the—the backmost log.
Eric: For sure. Alright, Troy, you want to pop it open?
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Alright. You open it up and it is an invitation. “Troy Riptide, for your acts upon the Great Salt Sea, you are cordially invited to the Bullseye Games, in three day’s time.”
Brandon: Ooohh.
Eric: “Bring your shooting weapon, and bring your crew. There's prizes to win.”
Amanda: Woooo!
Amanda (as Troy): Guys, we're going shooting.
[theme]
Transcriptionist: KA
Editor: KM