What do you do when Mothman crashes on your couch… permanently? Amanda GMs as Brandon, Eric and ARCS’ Briggon Snow and Lauren Shippen try to evict Mothman. Check out “Ah, Dang! Mothman Won't Move Out (He Said It Was Just For The Weekend)” by Ettin here, and name your own price to download the PDF!
Housekeeping
- Grab your tickets now to see us live in Austin on February 27! Head to multitude.productions/live today.
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Cast & Crew
- GM: Amanda McLoughlin
- Player: Eric Silver
- Player: Brandon Grugle
- Player: Lauren Shippen
- Player: Briggon Snow
- Mothman RPG creator: Ettin
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is a collaborative storytelling and roleplaying podcast. That means a group of friends create a story together, chapter by chapter, that everyone from seasoned players to true beginners can enjoy. Where else can you get adventure, intrigue, magic, drama, and lots of high fives all in one place? Right here.
After each episode we sit down for the Afterparty, where we break down our game and answer your questions about how to play Dungeons & Dragons and other roleplaying games at home. We also have the Punchbowl, an interview series with people pushing D&D forward creatively, communally and socially. It’s a party, and you’re invited! Find out more at jointhepartypod.com.
Transcript
Amanda: Do you know how sometimes you have a friend who texts you? And is like, “Hey, I'm just in a pinch. Can you help me out?” And you're like, “Of course, man. Like, can I bring over some Gatorade? I'm sorry you have the flu. Like, can I, you know, bring you any takeout, because you're under deadline right now? Or, you know, my plants need watering. And I'd love to help you out.” And then, sometimes it's Mothman at your door, and he needs to crash there. And then three weeks go by and he hasn't left?
Lauren: Mhmm.
Eric: Yes. That is something that I dealt with. Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah, happens to me all the time.
Eric: For sure.
Brandon: No, Amanda, that's a wild story you just wove.
Amanda: Well, thanks to Paul Matijevic, who made this wonderful one page RPG, “Ah, Dang! Mothman won't move out. He said it was just for the weekend.” That's what we're gonna be playing today.
(Players yell affirmatively)
Eric: Yay.
Brandon: Yay.
Lauren: Yay.
Eric: Mothman party!
Lauren: Oh, dang!
Eric: Mothman party!
Brandon: Yeah, one party that he wouldn't leave.
Amanda: Every—
Eric: Yes. We had the party. And then he’s like, “Oh, I'm just gonna sleep it off,” and then he never left.
Amanda: Every day is a party when Mothman is your roommate. That’s I want to be very clear.
Amanda: Welcome Briggon Snow. Lauren Shippen, welcome to the show. Thanks for playing with us.
Briggon: Nice.
Lauren: Hello. Thank you for having us.
Amanda: Well, this is the story of how Mothman came to live with all four of you, roommates, and, hopefully, how you helped him to move on with his life. So, our idea here is that we have to help Mothman fix his problems because he has many problems. And that is why he was crashing with his friends. So, we know that Mothman showed up about three weeks ago. And we need to know who all of you are and also where you live and what dope things your house has. So, why don't we start with Eric? Tell us about your character.
Eric: Sure. So, the way that we're supposed to pick this is we have to give ourselves a role. And then we have to write down two things that we're good at. And then we write down our name and what they could be doing right now if not for Mothman. So, my character's name is Octavio Redwine. I’m a 43-year-old Shakespearean actor who is playing the role of an Everyman in order – for a new play that I'm going to be in. So, you, three, may know me as Drew – as Drew Everyman, because I forgot to come up with a name. But, when you – I feel like I'm the newest roommate. And you're like, “So, what's your name? What's your deal? I'm like, “Ah,” and I saw—
Lauren: You look over their shoulder and there's—
Eric: There’s a Mountain Dew bottle.
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: And I'm like Mountain Dew! I mean Mountain Drew Everyman.
Amanda: He's really into mountains.
Eric: So, I don't know. We could talk about whether or not you, three, know if I'm – if I’m a 43-year-old man or I'm just like your, your regular roommate. So, my two things that Drew is good at is driving RC cars and Netflix. But Octavio Redwine is good at Shakespeare and knowing famous people. And what I could be doing right now is running lines with Anthony Hopkins on Celebrity Skype, which is Skype for Celebrities. But I mean – I mean listening to rock on my free Spotify account.
Amanda: Excellent. So, the, the mechanic here is that you have two things that you're good at. Kind of like proficiencies in D&D. And, if you are trying to do something that makes use of your talents, then you get some extra help in rolling for those outcomes. So, Eric, I think I'll say that you have to be using Drew's terrible skills unless you want to break your cover—
Eric: Yes.
Amanda: – and come forth as Octavio. And then you can make use of Octavio’s 43 years of experience and skills.
Eric: I just went to the Royal Shakespeare Academy. And then I immediately just keep doing Shakespeare. That's all I'm good at. Yeah. I guess my question is do any of you, there – and we can address this, I think, as it's going. Do any of you, three, know that I am Octavio or I'm just Drew, your roommate from I would say maybe like six months ago. I don't know.
Brandon: I think I – we don't – I don't know that you're—
Briggon: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah. I don’t – I don’t think I know.
Brandon: – Octavio, but I, I do have a poster of you on my wall as my favorite Shakespearean. Yeah.
Eric: Okay. Okay. I'll be Drew unless I break the façade.
Brandon: I’m just sitting above the bed.
Amanda: And, and, Eric, what's your role in the group at large?
Eric: So, I think that this is more like I’m Mist– you know when you have a roommate that you just don't know anything about?
Amanda: Oh, yeah.
Eric: Like, they're nice. But, yeah, they’re—
Amanda: The hot one who has the leather jacket.
Eric: No, no, not even. Just like—
Brandon: Just got glimpses of Amanda’s life here.
Eric: I remember that one.
Amanda: Brandon, it's that I want to be that one.
Brandon: Oh, really?
Amanda: But none of my leather jackets fit me.
Eric: No, I think that he's just like the roommate that you don't know anything about. So, I wrote down, like, mysterious, or oddball, or weirdo, but then, of course, normal guy. So, I guess, like, in the – in the function, it’s, like, the stranger who you got off of Craigslist. And it’s, like, he's nice. He's fine. He's clean. But you just like don't know anything about it if that fits.
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: Yeah
Lauren: Yeah, totally.
Amanda: Great. So, Brandon, speaking of, we know your character’s favorite Shakespearean actor.
Brandon: We do.
Amanda: We all have one.
Brandon: Yes.
Amanda: So, I'm glad that we know that right upfront. So, who are you?
Brandon: My name is Joel.
Eric: Hi, Joel.
Brandon: My role is dad.
Amanda: Cool. Cool.
Brandon: And, apparently, I love Shakespearean actors. And my two proficiencies, my two things, I'm really good at shooting hoops with the kids!
Amanda: Great! You gotta have one.
Eric: Wait. Wait a second. So, you're not good at basketball.
Brandon: No.
Eric: You're good with – at playing basketball with people who are younger so that everyone has fun?
Brandon: Yeah, I'm really good at explaining the rules of Horse to children.
Eric: Great. Great.
Amanda: And, again, you guys selected these for strategy.
Brandon: Yes.
Lauren: No.
Amanda: I am so glad to hear this.
Brandon: 100 percent. Yep.
Amanda: What’s the second one?
Brandon: Driving responsibly.
Eric: Oh, that's actually a good one.
Amanda: That's actually a good one. I retract it. Good job right now.
Brandon: Yes, in my ‘86 brown Station Wagon.
Eric: Nice.
Briggon: Ooh.
Brandon: It's got like leather interiors.
Amanda: Do we have like the fake wood exterior or just a – just a solid brown color?
Brandon: It's like a stripped fake wood.
Lauren: Right. Yeah. The belts. Very nice.
Eric: Yeah.
Briggon: Does it have a seat in the trunk that looks at the back that you can seat in?
Brandon: Yeah, of course.
Lauren: Yeah. Oh, my god. It’s so good.
Eric: So dangerous.
Amanda: So dangerous.
Lauren: Sweet and sour.
Briggon: Thanks.
Amanda: So good.
Lauren: It’s the best.
Brandon: No, there's no sweet and sour in my car.
Lauren: (Gasp) Wow!
Amanda: What’s sweet and sour?
Lauren: Sweet and sour, where you wave at the person – if you're sitting backwards, you wave the driver in the car behind you. And, if they wave back, they're sweet. And, if they don't, they're sour.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: And then what are the consequences for being that person?
Lauren: You get—
Briggon: Judgment.
Lauren: Yeah. You get made fun by kids in the backseat of a car that you don't know about, because you can't hear what they’re saying.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah. Very good. I think having kids on a bus make weird faces at me and like make fun of me is still my greatest fear.
Lauren: Absolutely. Yeah.
Brandon: Oh, absolutely.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: You just don't look. You just keep your head straight forward—
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: – when you see a bus pull up.
Lauren: Anytime I'm near a group of teens that is laughing, there are still that ingrained fear if they are laughing at me.
Amanda: Oh, yeah.
Briggon: Yeah.
Lauren: I don't – Yeah. A group of teens are scary.
Briggon: I think I want to change my posture. Like, I want to be cool.
Lauren: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah.
Briggon: It’s not gonna happen.
Brandon: What is the cool posture, Briggon?
Briggon: Just sort of like leaning while listening to Broadway show tunes.
Amanda: Yeah.
Briggon: I don't know. My, my mom said – my mom said that straight posture is the coolest posture. So, that’s what I’m doing.
Brandon: And then, finally, the thing that I'd be doing if it weren't for Mothman—
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: – is I'd be fixing the leaky sink in the guest room, god dang it!
Eric: We have two bathrooms? Fuck, yeah!. Alright!
Briggon: This is nice.
Eric: Really guest room?
Lauren: People I have—
Amanda: Excellent.
Briggon: Well, we have four people in the house.
Eric: Yeah. Alright.
Amanda: Excellent.
Eric: Please – Joel, please fix the sink in my bathroom.
Brandon: Are you – okay. I’ll go the thing.
Eric: Oh, thank you. I’m Drew, your new roommate.
Lauren: That was a close one.
Amanda: Every morning, you look at him and, like, your, your head goes a little to the side, and you're like, “I really know you from somewhere.”
Lauren: He’s got one of those faces.
Amanda: Great, Lauren.
Lauren: I am Quincy. I am the, the brawn of the group. I’m a large strong man.
Briggon: Yes!
Eric: No, but Lauren, tell what your character is.
Lauren: And my proficiencies are weightlifting.
Amanda: Great.
Lauren: Which I think might actually be, be useful. I spent a lot of time in the gym. And then, also, Quincy loves model trains. So, I’m making model trains and model train villages. If Mothman weren’t in here and I not having to deal with this problem, I would be painstakingly painting a Swiss village for my new train set.
Eric: Hell, yeah.
Amanda: Beautiful.
Briggon: Wow.
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: Really highs and lows there.
Lauren: Yeah, real attention to detail.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: And, yet, you know, loves lifting heavy things. Real – you know, people are—
Brandon: Every time an Amazon package comes, Quincy is right there!
Eric: A real man—
Lauren: But it something heavy or a little tiny train.
Amanda: And have you and Drew bonded about his love of driving RC cars and your model trains? Because you're a real synergy that's possible here.
Lauren: I think – I think there's some – I think there's some dancing, dancing around it, you know?
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah.
Lauren: Just like Drew's pretty quiet, and I'm pretty quiet. And, so, we're trying to like feel each other out a little bit, but I think – I think the potential is there for real friendship.
Brandon: What do the conductors – I assume they're called conductors, people who like trains.
Lauren: Yes.
Brandon: What do they feel about RC cars? Are they like low – is like high/low situation? Is train a high?
Lauren: Okay. What is an RC car? I don't—
Brandon: What?
Briggon: A remote control car.
Eric: A remote control car.
Lauren: Oh, remote control. Okay.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah.
Lauren: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Thank you. I was trying to guess and, and I don't know.
Eric: It was also like – I also had the thought of like stock cars. Like, you have to go to one of those places to drive cars. Do you know what I'm talking about?
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: Like a hobby shop.
Eric: Yeah, it's like a hobby shop.
Amanda: Ooh.
Eric: But it was like, really big and had tracks on it. So, it’s going to be like RC is like you could just drive it wherever, but maybe it's like stock cars.
Lauren: Mhmm.
Eric: Yeah. So, it's more like hobbyist. So, I don't do it in the house.
Lauren: I think the, the unpredictability of the – of the cars, freaks, freaks me out a little bit, you know.
Brandon: Yeah.
Lauren: And the best thing about the trains is you get to program them.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: There are tracks. You kind of know when we're going – when one is going to arrive.
Amanda: Exactly.
Lauren: Because trains always run on time.
Eric: Right.
Amanda: Lauren, did you also, when playing with dolls as a kid, just not have any conflict. And they just tried on outfits and were happy together.
Lauren: Oh, no. There was a lot of drama.
Amanda: Oh, really?
Lauren: Yeah. Yeah. But, like – but full like governmental.
Briggon: Murder.
Lauren: There's a lot of bureaucracy in my – in my childhood. Like, there were a lot of different – everybody had a different job. And, so—
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: – there was a lot of like political drama.
Amanda: Nice.
Lauren: Yeah.
Briggon: One of your dolls is filibustered for an entire evening.
Lauren: Listen, I’m not gonna say that that never happened. But you can't prove that it did unless you talk to my sister.
Amanda: Extremely good. Briggon.
Briggon: Hi.
Amanda: Who are you?
Briggon: I am Mannheim, Mannheim Steamroller. You can call me, Manny.
Brandon: Can I call you – can I call you, Steamy?
Briggon: Yeah, Steamy as well.
Lauren: Steamy.
Brandon: Good.
Briggon: I am big into fashion.
Eric: Okay.
Briggon: And I'm also an astronaut.
Amanda: Oh?
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: A non-practicing astronauts?
Lauren: You've been to space?
Briggon: Yeah, sure. Absolutely.
Brandon: I can’t tell a Steamy’s lying or a Briggon’s lying.
Amanda: Lauren, we’re in space right now.
Briggon: I'm the smooth one of the group. And, if Mothman wasn't taking up our living space, I'd be doing really cool space experiments.
Lauren: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Brandon: On Earth.
Lauren: Yeah, that sounds very real... Manny.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: Cool.
Briggon: Because it is.
Brandon: Do you have, like, a centrifuge in your living room? Just—
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: The biggest telescope.
Briggon: I have toilet paper rolls and—
Eric: I would be in space right now but Mothman’s really fucking my shit up. What astronaut has roommates? I know – I know that’s not the thing to focus on, but shit. Oh, goddamnit. Okay.
Brandon: Do you have like a fashion spacesuit? It's like, spacesuit but fashion.
Briggon: Yeah, well, you add little elements of flair—
Brandon: Love it.
Briggon: – for your personality. But I usually wear like, something really ostentatious under the spacesuit as sort of like a surprise for later or something.
Eric: Aah.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah, that's your after-party look—
Brandon: Exactly.
Amanda: – after the award ceremony.
Briggon: Yeah.
Brandon: Zero gravity sequence. That’s pretty great.
Eric: I do like this. This is like Tan France was an astronaut.
Briggon: Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: Someone’s like, Uh—
Briggon: You described my perfect man.
Brandon: Very cocky.
Eric: Tan France, but make it astronaut.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Yup. Alright.
Amanda: Extremely good.
Eric: Amazing.
Amanda: And our next task is to describe the place that you are sharing. So, everyone is welcome to throw in ideas here. Like, do you own or rent it? Is it an apartment versus a house? Are you all roommates on an ongoing basis or are some of you like here visiting others that you might know beforehand? And then you can also each choose a useful feature that the house has. I’m also going to let us do it in your car. So, if either your house or your car has like an interesting feature. Some of the examples listed here are like a big wardrobe, a garage workshop, a home theater system, a tool shed, a wine cellar. I don’t why it's useful, but it’s cool. A cult junk in the attic, et cetera.
Briggon: Huh.
Amanda: Mothman may or may not be ruining this thing by the way. So, let me know if he hasn't discovered it yet. Or, if Mothman who is just like a – just like an ooze just taken over all your cool stuff that he isn't paying rent on has gotten to it yet.
Lauren: So, we're all – I mean we're adults. So, we presumably all have our own bedrooms in this house or apartment, right?
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah.
Briggon: Yes.
Lauren: I think – I think Quincy definitely has like a weightlifting machine that also starts the train set. Like, kind of a Rube Goldberg situation.
Amanda: Incredible.
Lauren: So, yeah.
Amanda: Also, great accountability.
Lauren: Exactly.
Amanda: You can’t play with the train unless you work it out.
Lauren: Exactly. Yeah. I, I power my trains through my muscles. And I think I, I lock my door every time I leave my bedroom. I don't think that Mothman has found it yet.
Amanda: Great. Excellent.
Eric: I do think just we are all in this – in a house. I think that is the most—
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah, I think so true.
Brandon: This is fantasy, and I want to live in a nice house.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah.
Lauren: Have to live.
Eric: Alright. So, imagine it's Columbus, Ohio.
Amanda: It’s the Midwest. Any of us might buy a house in our lifetimes. And—
Eric: Eric Schneider lives down the street. Anything can happen.
Briggon: And that was like weird influencer McMansions with like no art on the walls. And it’s just really just dark and kind of unsettling.
Lauren: It’s like the one leather couch and a huge pool.
Briggon: Yeah. Yeah. And we have huge followings.
Eric: All of us are all making Vines still.
Briggon: Yeah.
Eric: So, also, Vine still exists.
Lauren: This is the fantasy world. So, Vines is in this.
Amanda: Great. So, we're all in a house. We're all roommates. Each of you has your own room. And there's some common areas as well. Any other like cool stuff, either in the house or in your cars that you might want to throw in here?
Brandon: Yeah, I think Joel has like a full tool kit in his trunk. You know, like—
Amanda: Nice. Great.
Brandon: – it's like – it's like perfectly organized. We have 30 different screwdrivers of varying lengths in standard and metric. And it's every tool you could possibly think of.
Briggon: I think we have a fireplace.
Amanda: Excellent.
Briggon: And – but, up the chimney, I have stashed a secret space go-bag for if I have to leave in an emergency.
Eric: Space go-bag.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah, tell me – tell me – tell me what kind of bits that’s in that?
Briggon: Oh, it’s like a – it has like freeze-dried food in it and space passports and just like things—
Eric: Space passport.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Now, are those – is that a home invention? Or do you buy this from somebody on the internet?
Briggon: You buy it from somebody on the internet.
Brandon: Is a halo rocket in it too? Like—
Briggon: It – no, rocket fuel.
Brandon: Rocket fuel.
Briggon: Yeah.
Brandon: Yeah.
Lauren: Is it in like a Louis Vuitton bag or something like that?
Briggon: Yeah, Of course.
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: So, if we lit a fire—
Briggon: Like an orange. That’s really nice.
Lauren: Yeah. Yeah.
Briggon: Yeah.
Brandon: When we lit a fire in the fireplace and there's rocket fuel above it, we're all fine.
Briggon: Well, nobody lights fires there, because I—
Eric: Right.
Briggon: – say that I have, like, a breathing condition from the smoke.
Brandon: Yes. Yes.
Briggon: So, no one's supposed to use the fireplace.
Brandon: Okay.
Amanda: Good feature for an astronaut.
Briggon: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah, high stakes.
Briggon: Yeah.
Lauren: I like it.
Eric: I think I have a library. I think that that's the one thing I couldn't – that I could feasibly keep. I think it has just like – maybe I can roll for it, but just like lots and lots of shit. I think if that's like a – like an eclectic array of things anywhere from big – lots of Shakespeare to the occult and monster stuff.
Briggon: Is this, like, if you brought Belle into your room, she'd like, lose here shit?
Eric: Yeah.
Briggon: Sweet.
Eric: And then – and then the baker with his rolls, like, always come by. And I'm just like, “No, no, no.” Yes. So, I think that I have – and it can be – I can put it in the main area. I think everyone – I think that's enough, like, Everyman stuff. I'm just like, “Hey, howdy y'all. I have – I love books. Do you like books? Like, Christopher Jackson? You know that man? You – do you all like The Da Vinci Code? I have that. But, also, I just also have like magic books and like fucking – and all of Shakespeare I put up as well, but I only talk about like Percy Jackson and the, The Da Vinci Code.
Amanda: Does Drew have a cover story as his occupation?
Eric: Oh, shit. Yeah, he just works in sales.
Lauren: Yep.
Eric: Just sales.
Amanda: Great.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: Joel looks at the Shakespeare on the shelf and looks back at Drew and looks back to the Shakespeare and looks back at Drew.
Eric (as Drew): What is it, Chum? Would you like to read Percy Jackson with me? Would you like to have a book club in our shared house?
Brandon: And then he picks up the Da Vinci Code and walks away for it.
Amanda: Very good.
Eric (as Drew): Ah, Dan Brown, my favorite. Aha!
Amanda (as Drew): You should start with Angels and Demons.
Eric (as Drew): The cipher is tricky, but you get it after a little while.
Amanda (as Drew): If that one's too hard, you can try Artemis Fowl!
Amanda: Amazing. And I think our last kind of scene-setting thing here is where is Mothman crashing? And then we can also decide, like, a persistent problem that you all are facing that Mothman did not cause. So, there are some examples that we can think out of the box. Like, a rival who's out to get you, an evil neighbor, an important work thing, which is very vague. It sounds very much like up Drew’s alley, someone's unemployed, a cryptid-hunting landlord, et cetera.
Lauren: Is this a shared problem?
Amanda: Shared, shared problem for the house.
Lauren: Sort of the, the idea of like a rival neighbor is, is fun.
Amanda: I was thinking about like somebody who really enforces the HOA.
Lauren: Right.
Brandon: That’s it.
Amanda: Like, a neighbor who is like, “You have weed juice in your driveway.”
Lauren: Yeah, like your grasses are too high.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: Yeah, I like that a lot.
Eric: That's good.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Like, the fence – like, there's some fence dispute.
Eric: Yeah, I like that.
Brandon: Like, he parked on the street inside of your driveway one night.
Amanda: Excellent.
Brandon: And they give you a ticket immediately.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: It's like a fake ticket. Like, they printed off themselves.
Amanda: Right.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: They're like, “From the neighborhood watch.
Lauren: Because the HOA can give tickets.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Like, from the Grassy Hole Neighborhood Watch.
Lauren: Grassy Hole.
Eric: That’s the – that’s the name—
Brandon: The name of our neighborhood’s Grassy Hole?
Eric: Yeah, it’s bad.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Amanda: Oh, geez.
Brandon: Oh, geez.
Amanda: Oh, boy. Oh, okay.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Amanda: Well, that wraps up Mothman Party.
Lauren: Fun party.
Eric: Listen, at least two of you, should be listening to my DMing. So, I don't know why you’re surprised. I'm not gonna say who.
[collective laughter]
Amanda: Great. So, we're gonna open here in the evening after work. It is a Tuesday evening. Everybody is home, and you are just trying to do your normal evening activities. So, what do you guys do like on, on a work night before you go to bed?
Eric (as Drew): I think I make a big scene of doing regular man things. So, I walk and I'm like, “Oh, what a good day after work at sales!” And I go over to the fridge, and I pull out like a can of beer. And I'm like, “Ah, refreshing brewski for me to enjoy, to relax after sales.” And I crack – crack it open and go, “Pfft! Ah!!”. And I sit down on the couch, and I'm like, “Time for me to watch football,” but Mothman is sitting – is laying on the couch. So, I can't dramatically like go, “Aah!” like I usually do.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric (as Drew): And I will say, “Uh, hello, Mothman. I need to do my relaxing times to chill out after the band kept me down.”
Amanda (as Mothman): I wish I could relax.
Eric (as Drew): It seems like you are on our couch.
Amanda (as Mothman): I just – I really just want my van back, you know? Like I, I just – it went missing. And then I couldn't find it. And then – and then, today, someone said on the internet that they saw my van at the Cryptid Museum. So, I just think that's really unfair. Like, if they asked me – they asked me for some of my like relics or my old clothes or, or, like – I don't know – a coffee cup that I used once, I would just give it to them, but they took my van, man.
Brandon (as Joel): They stole your van, and then put it in a museum for others to look at?
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah, man!
Eric (as Drew): Oh, Joel, you're also home from job!
Amanda: Eric, can you go ahead and roll the dice for me, please.
Eric: Roll just for what?
Amanda: Just roll.
Eric: Okay.
[Dice Rolls]
Amanda: Don't worry about it.
Eric: Oh, three.
Amanda: Okay. So, the other roommates are mildly suspicious of you at this time.
Eric: Oh, no!
Briggon: Yeah.
Eric: I normally does such a good job of obscuring it.
Brandon: Joel has been in the recliner in the living area this entire time.
Amanda: Yeah.
Briggon: And he's just looking at Drew side-eyed. Like, what are you doing? Who are you?
Lauren: Yeah. Quincy has been behind the couch—
Amanda: Oh?
Lauren: – all of my – he’s like sitting on the floor. All of my, my paints are like spread out in space or like behind the couch play in between like the couch in the window out to outside.
Amanda: Yes.
Lauren (as Quincy): And I'm trying to – I'm trying to paint a little house and spend all my paints, but it keeps breaking my paint—
Brandon (as Joel): Quincy!
Lauren (as Quincy): What?
Brandon (as Joel): You’ve been there the whole time?
Eric (as Drew): Oh, Quincy, you're also home from job.
Lauren (as Quincy): Yes. Yes, I am – I am home from my job.
Amanda (as Mothman): You guys come home from your jobs like five out of every seven days. I know why this is so incredible to remark on. I just – I’m – I don’t know what the problem here. Also, your neighbor stopped by, and he said something about the grass. I didn't land to the door, because I'm, I'm a Mothman, buddy. He’s yelling at the door.
Brandon (as Joel): Please, please, don’t answer the door. Please, never answer the door.
Amanda (as Mothman): No, no, I won't. I won’t
Brandon (as Joel): Okay.
Amanda (as Mothman): There’s someone out to get me. You know, it's just kind of depressing. So—
Lauren (as Quincy): Did they – what did they – what did they say about the grass?
Amanda (as Mothman): That it was too high or low. I forgot.
Lauren (as Quincy): Grrrr.
Eric (as Drew): Oh, I think that we need to do what we would all call a roommates meeting. Where his good friend, Mannheim, from Space Job?
Briggon (as Mannheim): I- I walk in from my room going to the kitchen. I'm wearing a – an astronaut helmet.
Lauren: Oh.
Briggon (as Mannheim): I reach in --
Amanda: Open, open, or close, bud?
Briggon (as Mannheim): Closed.
Amanda: Okay. Good.
Briggon (as Mannheim): And I grab a Tang out of the fridge.
Amanda: Okay.
Eric (as Drew): I will say – and I’ve – and I’ve been wanting to say this the entire time. Manheim might as well be a Drag Queen. He fucking is.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Amanda (as Mothman): I mean we don't know that you’re not.
Lauren (as Quincy): We don’t know that that’s not the case.
Eric (as Drew): Like, we don’t know that you’re not.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Eric: But I'm just like, “You’re just describing things.” And I’d be like, “I would go see the show.”
Lauren: That would be a good background.
Eric: They would – he just need to go and sing Rocket Man with this on, lip-synching, and do a death drop, and I'd be like, “Fuck, yeah. Yes, queen!” This is – this is Eric talking.
Briggon: I, I grabbed the, the Tang. And I put it underneath the helmet. I don't open up the, the shield. I just have a sip of that.
Lauren: Does it have a straw?
Briggon: No.
Lauren: That's very awkward.
Briggon: There’s like a wholesome sort of like pleasing – you know, when you're trying—
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah, I do. Maybe it's a 20-ounce plastic bottle.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Because you don't care about the environment.
Briggon: Yeah, Joel’s is—
Amanda: Maybe you’re just about space.
Brandon: We can just go to space. It’s fine
Eric: Hey.
Briggon: Let's leave.
Eric: If that’s the policy, throw your shit wherever you want.
Brandon: Yeah. Joel is reconsidering all of his life choices with everyone around him.
Amanda: So, again, it is your mandate here to try to help Mothman fix his problems in order to get the hell out of your house.
Brandon (as Joel): Mr. Man. What did your van look like? How do you know --
Lauren: Who’s that?
Amanda: Mr. Man! [laughs]
Brandon (as Joel): That's not your last name?
Eric (as Drew): Mr. Man is right there. That is our good roommate, Mannheim.
Brandon (as Joel): I thought your name was Moth Man.
Eric (as Drew): I think – hold on. I want to do this iambic pentameter. I think that our good friend, Manheim, is right. Let's all go drink some Tang together to, to, together – together is like apostrophized – to’nights.
Brandon: Wait. Hang on. No.
Eric (as Drew): Yes.
Amanda (as Mothman): I mean, normally, when I fill up government forms. I put The as my first name, and then Mothman is my last name. So, I get some, some like direct mail and stuff that is like, “Mothman, The.” And I'm like, “That's not who I am.”
Brandon (as Joel): Gotcha. Okay.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Hmm.
Brandon (as Joel): Uhh.
Lauren (as Quincy): So, we got you, Mr. Mothman.
Amanda (as Mothman): Just, just Mothman is fine...
Lauren (as Quincy): Just Mothman.
Brandon (as Joel): Mothman.
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah. You guys have been great. Listen, I, I just – I don't know. I, I didn't want to mention this, but we're almost out of Tang. And I find that beverage really pleasing. So, I don't know if someone could like, pick it up in the outside world. Like, I can't because I'm a Mothman.
Brandon (as Joel): We're almost out of Tang.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): You don't live here.
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah, us in our – in our household. Yeah.
Brandon (as Joel): Okay.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): Are you gonna pay rent?
Amanda (as Mothman): Uh, that's really rude to ask a depressed cryptid like me, but—
Briggon (as Mannheim): How do you know is your van?
Amanda (as Mothman): It's my van. I have stickers all over it. You know that—
Brandon (as Joel): What, what’s in the side of the van?
Amanda (as Mothman): – Coexist sticker? I invented that. The first one is on my bumper, man!
Brandon (as Joel): Is there other cryptids?
Eric (as Drew): Oh, I recognize the – I recognize that one. That is the sticker that says, “Honk if you can see the future.”
Amanda (as Mothman): I always thought that those Grateful Dead Bears look a lot like my friend, Sasquatch. So, I just kind of have a bunch of those all over.
Brandon (as Joel): Okay.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Oh, that's nice.
Lauren (as Quincy): What is your license plate?
Amanda (as Mothman): I don't have one. I think that was the problem.
Lauren (as Quincy): Do you live in your van?
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah, man. It's just – it's a sleeper. It's a camper. It goes wherever I need to go.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Where's the last place that you, you saw your van?
Amanda (as Mothman): Out by the camping grounds.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Oh.
Amanda (as Mothman): I parked in there. It's long term parking. And then, one day, I went out and I came back, and someone had taken it.
Lauren (as Quincy): And it's now in a museum?
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah, someone brought it to the museum. And the worst part is it says, “Alleged Mothman Van.” It's THE Mothman van. It’s my van!
Briggon (as Mannheim): Have you called the museum?
Amanda (as Mothman): No, I think that would make bigger problems for me if they knew that I was real
Briggon (as Mannheim): Huh.
Lauren (as Quincy): Mhmm.
Amanda (as Mothman): They think it. They don't know it. But I just – I don't know what to do. I can't leave the house. I don't have a car anymore. I just – I miss my van, man.
Brandon (as Joel): I have an idea. I am the dad of this group. I'm gonna call them and ask for a manager.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Joel, such – I love that.
Lauren (as Quincy): Yeah. Yeah, amazing.
Briggon (as Mannheim): That’s amazing.
Amanda (as Mothman): That's a – that’s a really proven tactic.
Brandon (as Joel): Alright. So, I'm going to call up the Cryptid Museum; 1-800-CRYPTIDS. And—
Eric: Everyone listening, call that number right now.
Amanda: So, here's how we're going to do this. You are going to roll two D6. It’s a little bit different from how the RPG suggests, but, for the narrative, that’s what we're gonna do on the show. Roll two D6. I'm going to give you another D6 that you can roll because you are proficient at being a dad and, and doing this here. And then, on a higher end of the spectrum, the good thing you want to happen happens. There's no consequences. On the lower end of the spectrum, the bad thing happens. The good things never gonna happen again. And we will deal with the fallout then.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Ah, my life.
Eric (as Drew): Cool.
Brandon: So, the – like, extra – extra dice is almost like an advantage reroll type situation.
Amanda: Yeah. So, why don't we roll three dice? And then you can eliminate the lowest one.
Brandon: Cool. We can use the same numbers, but—
(Dice rolls)
Brandon: 2, 4, and 1
Amanda: Okay. So, we'll eliminate the lowest one. 2 + 4 is a 6. So, it's a pretty mixed result. So, why don't you initiate the call to the museum?
Brandon (as Joel): Okay. Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring.
Eric: This is great.
Brandon (as Joel): Ring. Ring.
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Hello.
Brandon (as Joel): Hello. This is Mr. Stevens.
Amanda (as Museum personnel): How'd you get this phone number?
Brandon (as Joel): I found it in the phone book.
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Okay. No, I’m just joshing you. Welcome to the Museum. It’s just a little thing I do at work. So—
Brandon (as Joel): Sir, I don't appreciate your tone. Can I talk to your manager, please?
Amanda (as Museum personnel): I mean he's out hunting something. He wouldn't tell me exactly what. So, it’s either—
Brandon (as Joel): Can you route the phone call, please?
Amanda (as Museum personnel): It’s me or the intern. No, he does not bring a cellphone with him anywhere.
Brandon (as Joel): That's very odd. Do you have another person above—
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Government tracking, man. Government tracking.
Brandon (as Joel): Is the intern above you?
Amanda (as Museum personnel): No, why are you asking so many questions?
Brandon (as Joel): Mhmm. You have my child's van.
Amanda (as Museum personnel): I'm sorry. Like, it was left in the parking lot.
Brandon (as Joel): You illegally towed my teenage son’s van!
[collective laughter]
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Oh, are you talking about that camper with no license plates?
Brandon (as Joel): Yes, that is the camper I am referring to. It's my teenage son's van!
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Well, I mean, if he was driving it around and there's no license plates, then, listen, someone’s going to tow it.
Brandon (as Joel): (yelling) Are you the cops?
Eric: Yeah. You know how – you know what dads say? “Are you the cops?”
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Can't, can’t trust the cops, man. Can't trust the cops.
Brandon (as Joel): So, you do thievery as opposed to calling the cops?
Amanda (as Museum personnel): Listen, we operate in the gray man. It's that stuff that you think exists, but no one knows.
Eric: I love.
Briggon (as Mannheim): In a gray, man.
Brandon (as Joel): Well, here – here, let me tell you, son. Here's what I'm going to do. I am going to call the cops on you! If you do not let me get my son's van back.
Amanda (as Museum personnel): If you can show up and prove, proof of ownership, then we have to give you back your property because people own things.
Brandon (as Joel): Are you one of those socialists, sir?
Amanda (as Museum personnel): I'm outside the political spectrum, man. You don't even know how I – how I do.
Brandon (as Joel): You're an anarchist!
Brandon: And I hang up the phone.
Eric (as Drew): So, how did it go?
Brandon (as Joel): It went really well y'all. We can go to the Cryptid Museum and show proof of ownership, which I assume you have, Mothman. And we'll just get it back.
Amanda (as Mothman): Uh, no. Someone gave me the, the camper when I helped them avoid a house fire. And I've just been driving it ever since, you know?
Brandon (as Joel): Well, I give up!
Lauren (as Quincy): Is there, like, anything in the glove box? Like, registration, insurance?
Amanda (as Mothman): No, I don't do those things. But there's like pictures of, of me. There's like stuff. There's journals and—
Lauren (as Quincy): Do you show up on photographs?
Amanda (as Mothman): That's a very weird question to ask. Yeah, I do.
Eric (as Drew): He's a large Mothman.
Lauren (as Quincy): Hmm-hmmm.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Well, wait, they would want Mothman over a van, right? This is a Cryptid Museum.
Brandon (as Joel): We can just trade Mothman in—
Amanda (as Mothman): Oh, no!
Eric (as Drew): Well, it could be a trap.
Brandon (as Joel): – for a van.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Oh, yo! We – our problem’s solve. We just give Mothman over to the Cryptid Museum.
Amanda (as Mothman): That’s not a – that's – that’s not – that’s not what I want to happen.
Brandon (as Joel): Why not?
Eric (as Drew): Oh, that’s what my friends at work call a dick move. That's what I have heard them call it.
Brandon (as Joel): Okay. Okay. You’re right. You’re right. You’re right.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah. No, but we use it as—
Lauren (as Quincy): As, as bait.
Briggon (as Mannheim): – as bait. We say we've got Mothman. We just want the van back. And then we double-cross the, the Cryptid Museum patriarchy for the, the van.
Lauren (as Quincy): It’s very smooth.
Briggon (as Mannheim): The anarchist.
Eric (as Drew): I like that.
Amanda: Mothman jumps up onto his feet and stares at the ceiling. And his eyes kind of go blank. I'm describing by the way. He's extremely ripped! [laughter] and has very wide wings that look like a moth but can fold up kind of like a – like an angel or into chicken wing or something like that.
Lauren: Quincy is very intimidated by this. He doesn't like that there's someone more ripped in the house than he is.
Amanda: Yeah. Well, I can see why you're being so—
Lauren: Yeah.
Amanda: – aggressive toward Mothman.
Briggon : Mannheim lifts up his biceps.
Lauren (as Quincy): He’s biceps.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Just look—
Brandon (as Joel): To get a better look?
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Amanda: So—
Briggon (as Mannheim): Tska-tsh-tsh-tska!
Amanda: Mothman stands up, his wings extend completely outward. He's like a 12-foot wingspan guys. They like, brush the books on both sides of the room. And then out a sort of like very—
Briggon (as Mannheim): You know, what they say about the wingspan.
Brandon (as Joel): It’s better to fly with.
Lauren (as Quincy): Yeah.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Eric (as Drew): Big penis!
Amanda: Mothman doesn't hear any of you, because he is deep in the trance.
Lauren (as Quincy): For the best.
Eric (as Drew): Well, that was Eric. Eric ripped a hole just like I said it...
Amanda: And Mothman, in a – in a voice that sounds like it's coming from faraway says, Amanda (as Mothman): “They're, they’re coming from the sky with their lights to take and take tonight.” And then he, like, collapsed back down the couch. Like, “Oh, oh, what did I say? Oh, I'm so sorry. It's so embarrassing. It's like, when you twitches, you fall asleep. And then someone who's there knows that – I'm sorry. What did I say?”
Brandon (as Joel): Aaaaah.
Eric (as Drew): So, who wants to get tacos tonight?
Briggon (as Mannheim): Wait. You said people are coming from the sky.
Lauren (as Quincy): With lights?
Briggon (as Mannheim): Aliens?
Amanda (as Mothman): Did I?
(Players yells affirmatively)
Lauren (as Quincy): Yes.
Eric (as Drew): Yes.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yes.
Brandon (as Joel): Yes, you did.
Amanda (as Mothman): Aaah. Well, that's not good. I – listen, you guys have been really nice. And I don't want to like bring alien visitations down upon your household. So, can we like – I don't know – figure out this van thing soon? Like, right now.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Wait. You know aliens?
Amanda (as Mothman): I mean I, I don't not know about them. [snickers] But I – it’s a little bit like – it's kind of like a cryptid pact. Like, you don't want to say that someone else exists. They're not gonna say that you exist and, like, out each other to the broader human society.
Eric (as Drew): Alright. I get that.
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah.
Briggon (as Mannheim): I totally have experience with, with aliens. And they're very – yeah, I'm, I’m – like, yeah, I understand. Totally.
Lauren (as Quincy): Oh, so, it’s not going to be a problem then if they come down, because you can just talk to them?
Brandon (as Joel): What is happening?
Eric: Oh, can I – can I look at something in a – in the books about this? Like some—
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: – anything that's like monster, about aliens, or—
Briggon: Da Vinci Code.
Eric: Yeah, I can look in Da Vinci Code, actually. So, I would like to roll – am I prepared because I have books?
Amanda: Yeah, let’s do it.
Eric: I have a book on this. Alright.
Amanda: Throw three D6.
Eric: Okay. Oh, no, Brandon touched this. This is gonna be a bad roll.
[Dice rolls]
Eric: Alright. So, I got a 5, and a 6, and a 1. So, I'm going to drop the 1. So, I get an 11.
Amanda: Great. So, what do you want to learn from these books?
Eric: I think I want to know – I, I have two questions to, to my fellow players. I either want to know about aliens, because I think that we know it's aliens or about, like, how good Mothman prophecies are. Like, do I want to know about prophecies or do I want to – we – are we making the leap that it is aliens if I'm gonna look up shit about aliens.
Lauren: Huh.
Amanda: I think it's a good time for a Mothman surprise.
Brandon: We should build something.
Eric: Oh. So, hold on. Do we have a stinger for that?
Amanda: Chica! chica!
Eric; Mothman surprise!
Amanda: So, basically, here, you, you can roll to see if you can get a special insight or message from Mothman. I mean you can ask me one of these questions, and I can just tell you straight up what the answer is.
Brandon: Oh, okay.
Lauren: Oh, awesome!
Eric: So, do I have to use my roll? I can just ask you?
Amanda: You're gonna roll again. So, you can roll two D6.
Eric: Okay.
Brandon: Mothman surprises sounds like we bake into some kind of password.
[Dice rolls]
Lauren: It really does.
Eric: Oh, I only got a 5.
Amanda: Okay. So, we didn't get the Mothman surprise this time. But you can – why don’t you choose one question to ask your books, and I will – I will tell you the answer.
Eric: Okay.
Amanda: You do get the sense that Mothman's not putting on any kind of artifice with the vision. Like, this is something that overcomes him. He says it. And, knowing Mothman from lore, he's known for predicting true things and helping people to avert disaster. So, I’m happy having that as like a baseline level of recognition—
Lauren: Okay. So, we do know that.
Amanda: – with Mothman.
Lauren: Okay.
Eric: Yeah. I think it's like, “Does Mothman have an association with other cryptids?” I think because you said that you're friends with Bigfoot, and they're also aliens. So, like, is there, like, a cryptid MCU I think is—
Lauren: Well – and, like, this Mothman have – have—
Brandon: A CCU?
Eric: Yeah, a CCU. Yeah.
Lauren: – enemies. Like, are the aliens friends or foe?
Eric: Yes, definitely. Like, what is Mothman’s association with other Cryptids specifically about aliens in this relationship?
Amanda: Gotcha. So, I will tell you with an 11.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: I'll tell you with an 11 that Mothman hasn't met any aliens before, but he has heard tell that they are legit. And everybody is kind of waiting for them to come. So, that is not like the kind of whole, you know, alien watch like UFOlogy situation. They're not completely wrong. And he has not met any of them before. But him and Sasquatch and some of the other cryptids that are in North America do know each other. They have cell phones. They text. They have a Snapchat chain going. And they can communicate with each other. Mothman's cell phone however was in his van.
Eric (as Drew): Oh, no.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Aaah.
Eric (as Drew): Ah. So, I learned from my cool regular books. That, that Mothman has many friends on monstrous occasions. And we could figure out how they all hang out. But it seems like they don't have a – Mothman doesn't have a communication device. Like, we all have, when we all text in our roommate group text. Mothman has that with other monsters.
Brandon (as Joel): No. Are we sure that he's not the alien?
Lauren (as Quincy): I’m – I’m—
Briggon (as Mannheim): Wait. You guys are in a group text?
Amanda (as Mothman): Okay. You might want to look out the front window.
Eric (as Drew): What?
Midroll Music
Amanda: Hey, it's Amanda. Sometimes, these anecdotes that we do at the beginning of the Midroll are poetic. But, sometimes, you are craving chocolate and think you have nothing in your house. And then you realize there are four Thin Mints in the freezer. So, this is that feeling you get when you remember that there are Thin Mints in your freezer. Welcome to the Midroll.
If you are in Austin, Texas, or want a great excuse to visit, come see Join the Party, live on February 27th, 2020. It's the day before my birthday, and I'll be bringing everything I've got to a one-shot with the Join the Party Season 2 crew. Trust me, this is one you do not want to miss. Get your tickets now at multitude.productions/live. And, hey, if it's the future and you're listening to this after February 2020, head on over to that link anyway, because Multitude has many, many, many, many more live shows in the works.
I'm also beyond excited to tell you that we, at Multitude, just announced a new podcast! That's right. Sound the alarms. Next Stop is an audio sitcom written by Join the Party's own, Eric Silver, directed and sound designed by Brandon, assistant directed by Julia, and executive producer, whatever that means, by me. And I can say this because I didn't write it. It's really good guys. It's really good. It was truly a team effort and the real dang actors that we cast from the film, and theatre, and TV worlds here in New York brought so much life to the scripts. If you like Eric's jokes, vibrant characters, and empathetic world-building, you are going to love this show. The trailer is now live at nextstopshow.com and in your podcast apps. Just search for Next Stop. And we'll be posting behind-the-scenes photos and more @NextStopShow on Twitter and Instagram. Wooh! I'm so excited. Next Stop. I can't wait.
Hey, hi, hello to our newest patrons Emily Slaughter, Kevin, Villa, Alec, MK, Amils, KB, Ellie, Jen, Stephen, Mustbeen, Megan, Sydney, Aden, the Warlock, Charles, Airy, Angela, Hannah, Jessica, Devereaux, Mark, Alexandria, Vienna Star, other Jessica, Mira, Timmy, Megan, Kim, Bryan, Lady Zuzu, and Yohan. You made the excellent decision to join our community of patrons chatting up a storm every dang day in the patron-only Discord. But you also now have access to an entire season's worth of bonus content. There are NPC, backstories, bloopers, blog posts. So much wonderful stuff for your enjoyment over at patreon.com/jointhepartypod.
We are sponsored this week by Hero Forge. Hero Forge offers fully customizable tabletop miniatures with dozens of fantasy races and thousands of parts to choose from. Now, they also have full-color minis as well. We love our minis of our Join the Party Season 1 characters. And we know you're going to love yours as well. So, visit heroforge.com to start designing your custom mini today and check back often. New content is added every week. That's heroforge.com.
We're also sponsored by HelloFresh. You can break out of your dinner rut with HelloFresh’s 22 plus seasonal chef-curated recipes each week. They'll help you save time and stress over your dinner plan. So, you can just enjoy cooking and get dinner on the table in 30 minutes or even in 20 minutes with their quick recipe options. Their pre-portioned ingredients mean there's less prep for you, and less food waste, also less dishes, which is always great. We recently made ravioli with like ground chicken and veggies. And it's not normally something I’d attempt on my own for like a weeknight dinner, but it was delicious and really left me feeling great. To try them out for yourself, go to HelloFresh.com/JointheParty10, the number 10. And use code JOINTHEPARTY10 to get 10 free meals including free shipping. That's HelloFresh.com/JointheParty10 with the code JOINTHEPARTY10 to get 10 free meals and free shipping.
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And, now, let's get back to the show.
Theme Music
Amanda: Mothman sort of like peels open the blinds in the front of the living room. Like, behind the couch where – where the Quincy and painting was happening. And you see outside that there are about 25 people with signs looking up at the sky saying things like, “Welcome.”
Eric: Ha!
Brandon: Ooh.
Amanda: And we can't wait.
Lauren: Mhmm.
Eric (as Drew): I remember doing this with my good friend, Nicolas Cage. I mean, Nicolas Cages, a man at my job, looking at aliens. What?
Amanda: Mothman lays a hand on your shoulder and whispers,-
Amanda (as Mothman): “Nick’s a friend of mine, too.”
Eric (as Drew): Oh, you know, Nicolas Cages from the job?
Amanda: Mothman winks at you.
Lauren (as Quincy): I feel like, with all this new information that, yeah—
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): – it does seem like our roommate is an alien.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Eric (as Drew): No, just a regular guy. Mountain Drew alien. Mountain Drew Everyman, that's me. I think we should go get Mothman's phone back. Let's all go in Joel's car.
Brandon (as Joel): Alright. But you're sitting in the back seat, and I'm putting the blanket down.
Eric (as Drew): That's fine. Wherever you want. Jesus fucking Christ. So, do you think Drew is not a person?
Brandon (as Joel): I'm not convinced you're some goofy alien.
Eric (as Drew): Yeah, because I pooped myself when I go in the car.
Amanda (as Mothman): Guys. Hey, Drew – Drew is not an alien, man. Have you never seen an alien before, god!
Lauren (as Quincy): Have you?
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah.
Brandon (as Joel): Where?
Amanda (as Mothman): I mean I’ve – I've like – they Snap me sometimes whenever they're in in range. The, the Cryptid Group Chat I told you about before. Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): Alright.
Eric (as Drew): On the group chat!
Lauren (as Quincy): Are they nice?
Amanda (as Mothman): No one's really sure, and we're all too afraid to ask.
Lauren (as Quincy): Okay.
Amanda (as Mothman): So, listen, again, you've been – you’re very hospitable. I don't mean to make you commit a crime, but I want not to bring aliens down upon your household, because, now that these guys are here – and gestures out the window toward all the picketers – they are gonna think that this is like an important and holy site for the rest of time if aliens end up coming here. So, maybe we should try to – try to get that done.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Everyone in Joel's car.
Eric (as Drew): Shotgun!
Lauren (as Quincy): No, you're sitting in the trunk.
Eric (as Drew): Ha, ha. Trunk best spots.
Briggon (as Mannheim): I grab the go-bag from the—
Eric (as Drew): Smart.
Briggon (as Mannheim): – fireplace. And I run into my room and just grab like a nice boa just for flare just in case.
Amanda: Nice.
Lauren (as Quincy): I effortlessly move the huge toolbox in his trunk to, to make room for, for Drew in the back.
Eric (as Drew): Excelsior!
Briggon (as Mannheim): Be careful of that.
Lauren (as Quincy): I got it. I got it. I got it.
Amanda: Now, no one has mentioned an attached garage. So, I'm thinking of the cars are parked outside. How are we going to get Mothman into the car?
Brandon (as Joel): Well, they—
Briggon (as Mannheim): Oh, I put my astronaut helmet on him and put the boa around his—
Amanda: Oh, incredible.
Eric (as Drew): Yeah. Hell yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): Color effect. Yeah.
Amanda: Incredible.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Amanda: Roll for it, and let's see how that goes.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Okay.
Lauren (as Quincy): Would he fit in the car?
Amanda: So, three D6 here because you are proficient in fashion.
Eric (as Drew): I think – I think Manheim is also prepared.
[Dice rolls]
Briggon: Mhmm.
Lauren: Oh.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Eric: Oh, shit!
Amanda: Oh. That's a triple crit.
Briggon (as Mannheim): It’s Earth;s gravity.
Brandon: Yeah. Right.
Briggon (as Mannheim): It’s my fashion.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric (as Drew): Because Mannheim is good at fashion, can I roll another D6?
Amanda: We already did are good at fashion D6. What is your argument that you prepared for this? Is that you've been waiting for this, this scenario?
Lauren: You mean to makeover?
Briggon: My entire life. Yeah.
Amanda: Okay. Alright. You can have one more D6 after that.
Briggon: Oh, yay.
(Dice rolls)
Amanda: Oh, It’s a – it’s a fourth one.
Eric: Oh, my god.
Brandon: Another one.
Lauren: Amazing!
Eric: Yep.
Amanda: Alright. So—
Brandon: Did you – did you load these dice the wrong way?
Eric: I don't know Brandon did touch them first. So—
Lauren: Wow.
Brandon: So—
Amanda: So, here's how this goes down.
Briggon: Oh, no.
Amanda: So, everybody is waiting in the car except for Mannheim and Mothman.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: You have Mothman with the helmet with the boa, but nothing else that you mentioned. So, just, just his ripped bod and wings.
Briggon: Yeah. Yeah.
Amanda: And, as you try to kind of sneak out like the kitchen door like the side door of the house around the driveway, the picketers spot you immediately and start taking photos.
Briggon: Great.
Amanda: So, I will say that you're able to pull away, but there are definitely photos of you and Mothman. Definitely photos of what seems to be Mothman wearing an alien helmet—
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: – which does not help with the whole alien situation.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: And a couple of them jumped in their cars to start following you.
Briggon: But I looked fantastic in the photos though, right?
Amanda: You looked outstanding.
Briggon: Great. Awesome.
Eric: National – National Inquirer, “Mothman and Boyfriend?”
Amanda: Yes.
Briggon: We’re – we’re in the Bigfoot stride.
Amanda: Someone photoshopped you into Abbey Road.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: It’s a whole thing. It’s a whole thing.
Lauren: It’s a meme already by the time we get into the car.
Amanda: Incredible.
Brandon (as Joel): I want to really safely jump the curve to pick them up and drive away.
Amanda: You're an extremely safe driver. So, give me three D6, please.
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: A 6 and a 4. So, 10.
Amanda: Excellent. So, you do. You definitely leave some tire tracks that help give a, a kind of direction of where you were headed, but you're able to pick them up. And you are swiftly making your way toward the Cryptid Museum.
Brandon (as Joel): How do you like our grass now?
Eric: Eric Schneider.
Brandon (as Joel): I keep--
Eric: It’s Eric Schneider.
Amanda: Oh, it’s a pretty sick burn on your neighbor. You seem like a jerk. Speaking of which though—
Eric: Do you – do you bite your thumb at me, sir?
Amanda: Eric, please roll a D6.
Eric: Just one?
Amanda: Just the one.
Eric: Oh, okay.
Amanda: This is a suspension dice.
Eric: Three again.
Amanda: Okay. So, it definitely tickles the back of Joel's mind that you have heard someone with almost the same voice to say almost the same thing before.
Brandon (as Joel): Yeah, I give – I give Drew another look.
Eric: In my head, I was definitely in Romeo plus Juliet. Definitely. Definitely.
Briggon: You know what are their names?
Eric: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Definitely. When I was a younger man, I was definitely the – one of the guys in the beginning of – in Act 1 Scene 1 of Romeo and Juliet. And I—
Lauren: At the gas station?
Briggon: Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah, 100 percent. I was definitely one of those guys.
Amanda: Excellent.
Eric: We should just watch that. Can we stop?
Amanda: I know. I know.
Briggon: Truly.
Amanda: Be extremely persuasive. Great. So, on our way to the Cryptid Museum, are there any like tips, tricks, back roads? Are we just heading straight there? Are we gonna call again? What are your thoughts?
Eric: So, Joel's driving.
Brandon (as Joel): Is there an HOV light?
Amanda: These are all surface streets because you don't live too far from the museum.
Brandon (as Joel): Yeah.
Amanda: And I will say that it's about 8:00 o'clock and the museum closes at 9:00.
Lauren: Okay.
Eric: Okay.
Brandon: How long does it take to get that do you think? Just normally.
Amanda: About 15 minutes.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: Remember, we live in Columbus, Ohio.
Brandon: Right.
Amanda: Everything is 15 minutes away.
Lauren: And there was no traffic ever.
Amanda: No.
Eric: Let's see.
Amanda: They – you say the word traffic. And they’re like, “A big shot from a city, are ya?”
Briggon: That's a good question.
Eric: I'm gonna try to call this time.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric (as Drew): Because I'm gonna be like, “Joel, give me your phone. I am good at impressions.”
Brandon: Okay.
Eric (as Drew): I can do Ted from the movie, Ted.
Brandon (as Joel): Can I hear it?
Eric (as Drew as Ted): Hey, look at me. I'm fucking Ted. I'm a fucking teddy bear. Blah!
Brandon: Oh, my god that was spot on, bro.
Amanda: That’s really impressive, man.
Lauren: Really. Yeah.
Amanda: That’s really impressive.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: You should really – you should really lean into that.
Eric (as Ted): Oh, Seth – Seth MacFarlane – Seth MacFarlane, he's a really funny guy. He's good at writing and also acting and singing.
Brandon: Well, that doesn’t sound right.
Eric (as Drew): It’s from the movie, “Ted.” That was a quote.
Amanda (as Mothman): You can lean it to that, man. That's pretty good.
Eric (as Drew): Aah, they've told me I could do acting. Huh!
Brandon: What?
Eric: I shouldn't have said that. I mean community theater, but I did it at home.
Amanda: Let’s go. One – one more roll.
Eric: Oh, fuck, I guess I forgot.
Briggon: Mannheim loves watching Orville. So—
[Dice rolls]
Eric: Oh, shit. It’s five.
Amanda: Something has unlocked in Joel's brain. And there's a ticking time bomb of when he is going to identify you.
Briggon: His eyes go super wide.
Amanda: I think, if you weren't driving, you would say something.
Brandon: Absolutely.
Amanda: You are driving right now.
Brandon: Yeah, that's true.
Eric: But I need to keep my hands at 10 and 2.
Brandon: Yeah, my eyes – my eyes don't stray from forward.
Eric: Alright. So, I want to – I'm also gonna call it the Cryptid Museum.
Amanda: Yes, and what is your tactic here?
Eric: I think I'm gonna lie and say that you've been talking enough. And I think that I have gotten your voice, Mothman’s voice enough that I'm gonna try to be Mothman.
Lauren: Hmm.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): And be like, “Hey, so, so, it's my car. So, if you could just lead me there.”
Brandon: Why would that be helpful? You'd be confirming that Mothman—
Amanda: When I go into Mothman—
Eric: What I'm going to do, I'm gonna get them to go away. I'm gonna say – I'm gonna—
Brandon: Oh, okay.
Eric: I mean, doing a passion of Mothman—
Lauren: Got you.
Eric: – and say that like the direct – because I heard you were – that was on speaker, right?
Brandon: Yes.
Amanda: Mhmm.
Eric: Okay. So, I'm gonna say that, that what’s his – the manager is hunting Mothman. And they're hanging out. And they need everybody to go from the Cryptinomica to, to leave.
Lauren: To, like, the hunting place.
Eric: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: Like, they need to go out into the Ohio woods and just like, get fucked.
Brandon: Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Okay. Great. And are there any Netflix films that you are drawing inspiration from that can help you out here?
Eric: Yeah. I think there's, like – in preparation, there's a Seth MacFarlane cryptid movie called Mothman and Friends, and then I watched that. I watched all of Seth MacFarlane’s oeuvre to keep me prepared to be an Everyman.
Brandon: What's the Rotten Tomato score on that one?
Eric: Oh, it's like 23. Inexplicably, Charlize Theron is in it too.
Amanda: Alright. So, let's, let's get a roll with three D6 to see how this call turns out with the Museum.
Eric: Okay.
[Dice rolls]
Eric: Okay. I, I rolled a 5 and a 3 and dropping low. So, that's an 8 and then a 12.
Amanda: Great. Okay. So, you get the same person, who's-- hackles are already raised and a little bit suspicious.
Eric: Right.
Amanda: So, you call the museum. And they say again, “Hello?”
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Hey, hey, everyone. It's, it’s your good friend, Mothman. You know, everyone knows that's the voice I use. Uh, it’s me.
Amanda: In the background, Mothman goes, “That's not how I sound like.”
Eric: It sounds like—
Amanda: And it’s definitely on the ball.
Briggon: Kermit doing an impression of Mothman.
Brandon (as Joel): Mothman do you have a brother?
Briggon (as Mothman): Mothman, the moth here.
Amanda: What you don’t know Briggon is that my voice is an impression of Eric doing an impression of Kermit. So, you are – you are on point.
Lauren: Oh, my god. Spot on.
Amanda: You’re on point.
Eric (as Kermit): So, why are there so many songs about Mothman. Mothman have nothing to hide.
Amanda (in a Kermit voice): So Mothman, the aliens, and meeeee.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Hey, so, my friends, the aliens, they're coming down. So, I think you should go hang out with them. We're gonna go hang out in the woods. And your manager is also here. He's just coming to hang out. Yay! They're also coming to hang out. And we should all just go hang out in the woods and look at aliens. It's part of – you’ll get a bonus if you find the aliens. Yay! Come on out.
Lauren (as Manager): Yeah, it's super fun. Mothman is really cool. I’m your manager.
Eric (as Mothman): Thanks, manager. Let’s all hang out.
Brandon (as Joel): Where did you get this cool Kool-Aid full of cool alcohol and party and confetti stuff?
Eric (as Mothman): That was one of the aliens. He has cool shit.
Amanda (as Museum person): Who's at this party?
Eric (as Kermit): Oh, you know, it’s—
Eric: Now, I'm actually doing Kermit.
Eric (as Mothman): Oh. Hey, it’s, it's me, and your manager, and the aliens, and were all – and also Bigfoot is here. Whoa! He brought Natty Light. Wow!
Amanda (as Museum person): I am so torn between thinking this is a normal prank call and then the presence of Natty Light, which I don't think any Cryptid would choose or any person would make up.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Oh, it obviously – you obviously don't know much about Bigfoot. He loves Slim and Natty’s.
Briggon (as Manheim): Oh, my god Bigfoot. What a cool backflip you just did?
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Oh, I just did a sick backflip. You guys are missing it
Amanda: Is someone funneling? I'm a funnel master.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Go. Oh, yeah. They're fun – they funnel. Is it-
Lauren (as Quincy): Yeah, I got the funnel beer.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Yeah. They're funneling a bunch over there on the tree stump, because we're in the woods.
Brandon (as Joel): Joel said, “What's a funnel?”
Eric: It’s exact—
Briggon: Manny puts on Space Odyssey on Spotify in the background.
Amanda: So good.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): We’re all doing power hours. Come on out.
Amanda (as Museum person): So, the employee – you hear them go, “Fuck, Janel, can you close for me? Just, just like – just close the door. You don't have to lock it. It's fine. Fine.” Okay. I'll be right there. Thanks for the heads up.
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): No, like, take your intern too.
Amanda (as Museum person): I'm not gonna invite the intern to a party, man. Have you ever heard of workplace boundaries?
Eric (as Drew as Mothman): Oh, yeah. Totally understand. Alright. Bye. And then I hang up.
Amanda: Cool. So, you hear the sound of somebody like getting their coat on like zipping their bag and stuff as a – as the museum shop employee hangs up.
Eric: Nice. Okay. So, I think—
Lauren: Nice. One down!
Eric: I think there's only one employee, and she's an intern.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: So, we, I think we're set. I think we can dazzle her with, like, more than $10 an hour.
Brandon: You know, you can give her—
Lauren: Yeah. Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: Give her the cash money and it’s gonna be fine.
Eric (as Drew): Would you like $20?
Lauren: I can buy you a burrito from Chipotle. Would that be good?
Amanda: Quincy, is there any like routing knowledge that you are putting to the task here? Like, as you're approaching the museum, I'd love to know if people are still following you. I think we have our driving on lock. But is there anything that you want to contribute to this chase?
Lauren: Yeah, I do know the, the grid of the town pretty well, because I do like to know where the actual train tracks are.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Because it's, you know, fun to go look at them sometimes. So, I do—
Amanda: A lot. Whenever you can.
Lauren: – instruct Joel. As we – as we get closer, as we're about five minutes out—
Amanda: Yes.
Lauren: – I do know that there is like a service road behind the museum—
Amanda: Excellent.
Lauren (as Quincy): – that you can kind of sneak up on. And, so, I kind of – I, I lean forward and sort of like say to Joel like, “Okay. Yeah.”
Brandon (as Joel): Aah!
Briggon (as Manheim): Huh.
Brandon (as Joel): Why are you so close to this?
Lauren (as Quincy): Just take a right up here. And then – and then take the second left and then another right. And we'll behindthe museum.
Brandon (as Joel): Okay.
Amanda: Alright.
Brandon (as Joel): I do that.
Briggon (as Manheim): I'd like – I'd like to grab my go-bag and pull out the makeup that's in there. And start applying it to everyone's faces to look like different cryptids.
[snickers]
Amanda: Oh.
Lauren (as Quincy): Oooh.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: That's a bold strategy.
Briggon (as Manheim): Yeah.
Amanda: Great. Why don't you both give me three D6 rolls, please?
Briggon (as Manheim): Sweet.
Amanda: Lauren and Briggon.
Briggon: Can you give me more dice?
Lauren: Okay.
[Dice rolls]
Briggon: Oh.
Lauren: Thank you.
Briggon: Roll better.
[Dice rolls]
Amanda: Let’s start with Lauren.
Lauren: I got 3 and 6 for 9.
Amanda: Nice. Cool. So, you, you give correct routing. But there – it's gonna be like a better-lit service road than you thought. It's also very dusty. And there are kind of some discernible tracks that are leading into your alternate route. So, you may have lost your pursuers for now, but they will not be far behind.
Lauren: Okay. How where's the light coming from?
Amanda: Sort of, like—
Lauren: Like, it is a museum outdoor lights or something? Or—
Amanda: So, the museum, very into darkness.
Lauren: Right.
Amanda: So, they do not have a well-lit parking lot, but the, the road leading there is well lit.
Lauren: Okay.
Amanda: So, as your pursuers catch up on you – probably, they're about like six/seven minutes behind – they will be able to see what way you went.
Lauren: Gotcha.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Because I know – I know a little bit of electricity too because I need to know that for trains. So—
Amanda: That is true. Let's wait on that for a moment. Briggon, how'd you go?
Briggon: 5 and a 2. Yeah.
Amanda: Got it. So, what is your intention here? What do – what do you want to achieve with your makeup?
Briggon: Well, we just – you know, we called about a party. And, so, I just want to confuse the person even more.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: As if you are like dressing up as cryptids for the party or as if these are real cryptids for the party.
Briggon: Actual cryptids.
Amanda: Okay.
Briggon: Yeah.
Brandon: Maybe they got lost on, and they’re like, “Oh, where's – where's the party?
Eric: Yep.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: Yup.
Amanda: Because what you do achieve is looking like people dressing up as cryptids.
Brandon: Great.
Amanda: So—
Briggon: It’s great.
Lauren: Okay.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: That works out
Amanda: It is a different effect, but it has an effect all the same.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Great.
Briggon: Okay.
Eric (as Drew): I love this chupacabra thing!
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah, you're definitely chupacabra.
Eric (as Drew): I'm just like a – like, thank you for painting my face like the chupacabra!
Briggon: Yeah. Yeah, I think—
Amanda: Joel—
Briggon: – Joel will be an alien.
Brandon: Yeah, sounds right.
Briggon: And, Quincy, Pikachu
Lauren: Perfect, the ultimate cryptid.
Brandon: The famous cryptid. Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: Detective or regular?
Briggon: Regular.
Brandon: Okay.
Briggon: Let’s not get crazy.
Lauren: Oh, okay. It’s disappointing.
Amanda: His tiny detective hat is still in the house.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Great. And, Drew, can you just give me one D6 roll, please, to see if you show your proficiency with stage makeup.
Eric: Oh.
[Dice rolls]
Eric: I rolled a 5.
Amanda: Yeah. You have strong opinions about sponging and foundation. And everyone is like, “Oh, chill, man. Chill, man. Okay.”
Eric (as Drew): That's not how they did it! That's not how they did it at Edinburgh.
Lauren (as Quincy): What?
Brandon (as Joel): Where?
Eric (as Drew): You know, the Edinburgh Community Center, where I did all of my community theater. I was in Fiddler... on the Roof? It was a rap performance
Amanda (as Mothman): In Scotland?
Eric (as Drew): What?
Amanda: Great. So, you've rolled up to the parking lot. You look like people hobbyists who have painted their own faces en-route to a cryptid party. And you are here. So, it looks like the only person whose cars in the parking lot is the intern, Janel. And I don't want to do anything before you kind of make your plan of attack. You do see in the background there is like a gate that's padlocked. And, behind that, you see kind of a large trailer-shaped object with some tarps over it.
Eric: Good. I was just gonna—
Lauren: I'm gonna go and try and break the padlock with my hands.
Brandon: Do I—
Eric: Fuck, fuck yeah, dude. Rip – rip it.
Amanda: Yeah. Fuck yeah.
Brandon: I look into my wallet. Do I just have like inexplicably, like, hundred dollar bills like all dads do? Just—
Lauren: Yeah.
Brandon: But like an obscene amount of cash for an adult human being in this world.
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Yeah
Eric: Oh, yeah, like 2020.
Lauren: And like 2020.
Eric: Yeah, definitely.
Amanda: Yeah.
Briggon: I'm gonna put a little bit of the rocket fuel into the gas tank of our car.
Amanda: Ooh.
Lauren: Getaway Car!
Briggon: Just in case, because it’s Science.
Amanda: Let's roll – let’s roll for that all chemical reaction, please.
Briggon: Yeah. Three, right?
Amanda: Three.
Briggon: Yeah. Okay
[Dice Rolls]
Eric: Because you're an astronaut and a scientist—
Amanda: Astronauts need to know about fuel.
Eric: Yes.
Amanda: Nearly a one, but, instead, you got a 5 and a 6. You totally nuzz up that vehicle, man.
Briggon: Sweet.
Eric: There’s a nuzz button like steam come out of the dash now.
Amanda: It’s grippin’ and rippin’. And it’s ready to go.
Lauren: Nitro.
Brandon: I also realized, when I see Quincy walk over towards the padlock, I opened the trunk and pull out like a hammer.
Eric: Smart.
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: There are—
Lauren (as Quincy): But, like, you have like a bolt cutters-
Brandon (as Joel): Yeah, I have bolt cutters.
Lauren (as Quincy): – right there?
Brandon (as Joel): Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): Great.
Brandon (as Joel): And a crowbar? Yeah.
Lauren (as Quincy): Cool.
Eric (as Drew): Would you like – but, like, you just keep digging this shit out. You need this laser level, too?
Lauren (as Quincy): Because at the—
Brandon (as Joel): Do you – do you need a laser level? Is that—
Lauren (as Quincy): I could – I could use – I could use the wire cutters. No, the bolt cutters.
Brandon (as Joel): Okay. Okay.
Lauren (as Quincy): Yeah.
Amanda: You can use it later at the party.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yes!
Amanda: Yeah. Great.
Eric: Can you imagine someone on the rave with a laser level.
Amanda: That’d be fucking stick, bro. I don't know what you’re saying.
Eric: Ta, na, na, na, na, na. This, this thing gets done. Ta, na, na, na, na. Ta, na, na, na, na.
Amanda: Excellent. Cool. So, let's get a roll from Quincy. You are very strong. So, let's get three. And then, Brandon, if you could give me a roll with three D6, we'll see how helpful your tools are.
[Dice Rolls]
Lauren: That is eight.
Brandon: I got 8 as well.
Amanda: Excellent!
Brandon: 8 twins!
Amanda: So, it's going to take you, like, three or four minutes to get through this lock, but you're going to get through it.
Brandon: Lovely.
Amanda: Great. In the meantime, is there anything that Drew/Octavio wants to do? I think Mothman is sort of hunkered down in the car, but then, as soon as he catches sight of his trailer, he's going to throw off the astronaut helmet. Sorry, bud. He's going to run – bolts over that kind of, like, waist-high gate. Like, a car, you know, blocking the driveway-style gate. And then run back toward the trailer.
Eric: Oh. So, now, he's in there.
Lauren: Oh, it's not like a tall fence?
Amanda: No, it's like – you know, like a private driveway.
Lauren: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Amanda: Like a – like a stable. Yeah.
Lauren: I like how you have me like really struggling with this lock at a fence that sort of comes up like--
Amanda: Do you need to—
Brandon: Well, we have to – have to drive the van out.
Lauren: Yes. Yeah, it’s true.
Amanda: We definitely need to break it. We can’t just walk in.
Eric: Damn. I think – I don't know if I can do any of these things. But I want to, like, get my fan to chill out a little bit, because I will – can I do something before Mothman runs away?
Amanda: Yeah, you can – you can roll and see where you catch him in his – in his escape. What do you want to say to him?
Eric: I think, now that I look like the chupacabra and I know everyone's friends. I'm like--
Eric (as Drew): “Mothman, look at this friendly face. There's no reason to get worried. Everything's going to work out.”
Amanda: Any kind of like pop culture parallels you're trying to draw here with your Netflix proficiency?
Eric: I think, at this point—
Amanda: Or, are you gonna make a switch? Are you gonna can unmask yourself there?
Eric: I think I need to unmask myself. I think it's getting to the point where it's happening.
Amanda: And remind me of Octavio’s proficiencies again.
Eric: Octavio’s proficiencies is knowing famous people and Shakespeare.
Briggon: Su-super helpful.
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: So, I think that he does the thing. Like, you know in The Good Place when Jameela Jamil’s character – like, she – all she does is like game drop people—
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: – in ridiculous situations. So, that we – listen, that was what I – would happen with a Nick Cage thing. So, I think that he's just like-
Eric (as Drew): I remember the time that my good friend – I remember the time that my good friend, Marty Scorsese, was worried about his friends leaving him around. But we hung out and everything was fine ultimately. And that's when he won his 20th Oscar in the future for Irishman V: More Irishman.
Brandon (as Joel): You know Martin Scorsese?
Eric (as Octavio): I do, because – I'm sorry, Joel. I've seen my poster on your wall. And I think this was an inopportune time, but I am in fact your idol and hero, Octavio Redwine, Shakespearean actor and mild movie star. I was in that BBC Show you like as well.
Brandon (as Joel): Oh. My. God!
Brandon: I pass out.
Amanda: Great. I was gonna ask you to roll for how you reacted, but you just took care of that for me, which I appreciate
Eric: There’s nothing Brandon likes more than nerfing his own character.
Amanda: So, Mothman is actually very touched by this. So, let's do – let's do three D6 and see how this affects Mothman.
Eric: Oh, shit. Just a 6.
Amanda: Okay. Great.
Amanda (as Mothman): If you actually knew Marty, man, you know that he would never make a sequel to something like that. It was his – it was his masterpiece. It was self-contained. And there's no way he would have followed up IP, man. Like you don't even know him at all.
Eric (as Octavio): I know. But he invested in SpaceX. That was the problem.
Briggon: Oh, SpaceX.
Eric: Yes.
Brandon: I can’t go on after that.
Eric: OK. I should have—
Briggon: I was wondering.
Eric: I was wondering about the silence there.
Brandon: What did I say?
Amanda: So—
Briggon: Manny is recognizing that it's still tense.
Amanda: Yes.
Briggon: And walks up to Mothman and pulls out of his go-bag some little, like, rhinestones that you put on, on clothing.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: What’s in your go-bag?
Briggon (as Mannheim): And just – just says to Mothman, “You look really nice today by the way, I don't think anyone said that. But you look really nice.”
Amanda (as Mothman): Oh, thanks. It's just it's hard when you sort of losing motivation and sort of crashing on couches like between places. Like, your place is great. Don't get me wrong, but, like, the mirror only shows kind of like my chest. And, like, it's hard to just see the full picture, and thanks.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Well, it's amazing. And I think like – do you mind? And he – I grab the rhinestones. And I start to motion for your collarbone.
Amanda: Let's do three D6, please.
Briggon: Cool.
Eric: You're gonna bejewel Mothman?
Briggon: I'm doing a makeover.
[Dice Rolls]
Briggon: 4, 4, 8.
Eric: Nice.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Mothman is fucking into it.
Eric: Nice.
Amanda: And not all of them are gonna stick.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: So, it might not have quite the effect that you intended.
Briggon: That’s fine. We’re just trying to make a connection here.
Amanda: Yeah.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: Definitely, he feels connected. He’s still kind of like looking over his shoulder toward the camper van.
Briggon: Yeah.
Amanda: But he is – he is appreciating the person to person connection.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Hey, Mothman, you know what?
Amanda (as Mothman): What?
Briggon (as Mannheim): You look really fierce.
Amanda (as Mothman): Oh, thanks, man. Is it like – do they do motivational speeches in astronaut training? Because I just need to know a lot more about that program.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yes.
Amanda (as Mothman): Wow.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Amanda (as Mothman): I was planning to reconsider my life plan, you know? Like, it's pretty – it's like a dream, but it's reality.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Hey, after all this, if you want to, like, talk about plans for the future, like, just hit me up, you know?
Amanda (as Mothman): Well, thanks, man.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Yeah.
Amanda: And then some lights come on in the museum.
Eric: It's what my commander RuPaul always says, “We're all born naked, and the rest is fracked. Now, go into space.”
Amanda: And, like, Ru coming into the workroom, you will see front door of the museum fly open. And then there is the intern, Janel, who looks exceedingly well put together for someone working on a Cryptid Museum.
Lauren: Hmm. How am I doing on this – on the lock?
Amanda: I think you've just broken through the lock.
Lauren: Yes!
Amanda: Great. So, how do you guys react?
Eric: I think we just get them in and let's just fucking—
Lauren: Get on it?
Eric: It's an intern. Let's just fucking do it.
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric: We have – we have rocket fuel. Like, let's just do it.
Amanda: So, as Mothman runs back toward the camper and he can kind of deal with trying to get it started up, anyone want to help him with that?
Lauren: I'll go. Yeah.
Amanda: Great. Maybe some engine troubleshooting.
Lauren: Exactly. Yeah.
Amanda: That’d be very helpful. And is anyone going to talk to or go after, Janel? She's kind of standing on the stoop. Like, trying to take in the situation. Like--
Amanda (as Janel): what, what are you guys doing here?
Lauren: Oh, wait. Is-is Joel still passed out on the ground?
Eric: I’ll take Jo—
Amanda: Yeah.
Lauren: Okay. I pick up Joel and throw him over my shoulder.
Amanda: Excellent. I don't need to make you roll for it. You know, how to do that.
Eric: Briggon, are you gonna put a rocket fuel in the camper?
Briggon: Yeah. That’s what I was thinking. Yeah.
Eric: So, I'll talk to her if you put rocket fuel in the camper.
Amanda: Oh, nice. Beautiful. Okay. So, Joel, Quincy, and Mannheim are heading back in pursuit—
Briggon (as Mannheim): Thank you for using my full first name.
Amanda: Oh, you’re welcome. In pursuit of Mothman. And, Octavio, what is your strategy here with Janel?
Eric (as Octavio): I think I'm just gonna reveal the thing. I'm just gonna be like, “Hello, ma'am. I am Octavio Redwine, renowned actor. You might have seen me on that BB show – BB – BBC Show you like a lot.”
Amanda (as Janel): What?! You just wake up?
Lauren: Jostling adventure.
Amanda: Do you – do you pass down to like the second level of Inception and, now, time is going 10 times as long for you?
Brandon: Yes.
Amanda: Oh, beans. Okay. We should check on that.
Eric (as Octavio): I know. I was in the third season of Killing Eve. I was Killed by Eve! Do you remember? I'm here to do a role. And I need you to keep this quiet. But I want to be a – someone who works at a Cryptid Museum for a movie I'm doing with [5 beats of silence] Benedict Cumberbatch. He's playing a monster. I know, right? What is it like for your job?
Amanda (as Janel): Man, there was absolutely no higher role for him than that role with Johnny Lee Miller as Frankenstein is broadcast via MTLive. Oh, my god! I can't believe it. I-uhh...
Amanda: Give me three D6.
Eric: Okay.
[Dice roll]
Eric: Come on. Be amazed at my acting. A 6 and a 5. Yeah, 11. Bang, bang.
Lauren: Nice!
Amanda (as Janel): It would be my honor to show you every single facet of this very boring job. Would you like to come in?
Eric (as Octavio): I would love to. Haha! That also looks like Benedict. It's just like a – it's like a shrunken head. And I'm just pointing out things that look like Benedict Cumberbatch.
Amanda (as Janel): Does – does he really go by Benedict?
Amanda: And then we're gonna just fade out as you guys go inside. Great. So, let's go to the backyard. Mothman is trying to start up the camper, but it is not starting. So, let's see what kind of help we can lend him.
Lauren: Okay. Yeah. Is Joel still passed out?
Brandon: Can I make a roll to see if I wake up?
Amanda: Yes.
Brandon: What should I do? One or two?
Amanda: You can do two dice, please.
Eric: Now that I'm outside of your range.
Brandon: Eight.
Amanda: You do wake up. You're a little bit kind of clumsy as you're coming out of sleep or passed out-ness.
Brandon: Yeah. Yeah.
Amanda: But, yes, you are getting there.
Eric: The kick happens. You see – you see your top is spinning and, you know—
Brandon: Well, so—
Amanda: And Tom Hardy almost kisses you.
Brandon: As every dad has a really unrevealed but weird and out of character backstory, I know how to hotwire cars from my teenage days.
Amanda: Extraordinary.
Eric: Nice.
Amanda: Amazing. So, you get three D6 to start up the van. And I'll also ask the same from Quincy.
Lauren: Yeah, I'm gonna look – I’m gonna look under the hood.
Amanda: Using your engine knowledge.
Briggon: Oh, I'm sorry.
Amanda: And you look great while doing it, Quince. So ripped.
Lauren (as Quincy): Thanks. The arms are really working.
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: Pikapi!
Lauren: 7.
[laughter]
Brandon: I got an 8.
Lauren: I got a 7.
Amanda: Okay. Great. So, it's gonna take you a few minutes, but you are going to get the car going.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: You're able to hotwire it. But let's try to make sure with Quincy skills that it doesn't like cut out or have this problem again when Mothman gets to where he’s going.
Lauren: Would it also be – I don't know anything about – Lauren doesn't know anything about cars. Would it help if, while Joel's hot wiring it, I went behind and pushed it to like give it a little bit of that like, motion?
Amanda: It sure would. Three D6, please.
Lauren (as Quincy): Okay.
(Dice rolls)
Lauren (as Quincy): That is a 7 also.
Amanda: Great. So, it is helpful, but there are some kind of fits and starts. So, Mothman is inside. Mothman is very anxiously going through all of his possessions. Like--
Amanda (as Mothman): “Oh, man, I hope they didn't get rid of that phone book from 1972, which has a heavy encoded messages in it that I traded with Bigfoot before cellphones, which is much harder.”
Brandon (as Mothman): All my Digimon cards!
Amanda (as Mothman): Darn. All my pogs are gone!
Briggon: We probably-- rocket fuel, right?
Lauren: Yeah, into the sky.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah, put the rocket fuel.
Lauren: Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Briggon: But if we put it in, it'll just launch though, right? That’s how that works.
Lauren: Into the sky.
Eric: I assumed that it was like, now, it has nuzz. Like, you're in a—
Lauren: Yeah.
Eric (as Drew): You're in a Fast and Furious Movie.
Amanda: Once it starts. Yeah, once it starts.
Brandon: You know the camper they had in Fast and Furious.
Briggon: Yeah. Oh, my god, my favorite.
Amanda: The one that they take to space in FastX?
Eric: Yeah. Oh, I was just gonna say FastX. Mind Meld, it happens.
Briggon: So, I want to put that in.
Amanda: Great.
Briggon: Yeah,
Amanda: Yeah. So, you're able to put it in. Janel is thoroughly distracted. What else are you telling her about or asking her?
Eric: I think it's just a lot of – it’s, honestly, just like a lot of me pointing to different things and be like-
Eric (as Octavio): “Benedict looked like this. Nick looks like this.”
Eric: And it's just like one is just the little – like little green men statues.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Another one is the chupacabra. Another just like some skeletons that like – you know, like those fake skeletons, where they definitely just graft a bunch of shit together.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: So, it's like a skeleton with like two heads. I'm like, “That definitely looks like Benedict. Hahahahaha.”
Amanda: Janel is taking notes furiously.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: And asks you to sign a napkin.
Eric: Oh, definitely.
Amanda: Great.
Eric (as Octavio): To my biggest fan, Janel, reach for the stars. Ha! Ha! Octavio Redwine.
Amanda: And how do you stylize haha?
Briggon: Yeah.
Eric: With exclamation points after both ha and ha.
Amanda: Oh, different words.
Lauren: Different words.
Eric: Yeah.
Lauren: Both capitalized?
Eric (as Octavio): Ha! Ha! Yes.
Amanda: Cool. Cool.
Brandon: That’s the worse.
Amanda: Great. So, with that, you are able to hotwire Mothman’s car. With Quincy’s help, it is rolling. So, it has a rolling start. And then, with Manny's rocket fuel, he's able to floor it extremely fast. The gate is open.
Briggon: Great.
Amanda: There are the kind of pursuers of the alien watchers that you kind of hear coming down the road, but they are not – they’re not here yet. So, he does have a clean breakaway. Anything you want to say to Mothman before he goes?
Brandon (as Joel): You still owe us rent!
Amanda (as Mothman): I’ll mail it to you, man.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Wait. The aliens are still coming though, right?
Amanda (as Mothman): Yeah. Good luck with that.
Lauren (as Quincy): Mothman!
Briggon (as Mannheim): Wait. Can you on your communication device, maybe?
Lauren (as Quincy): Can – can you text them?
Amanda (as Mothman): Oh, yeah. No, I’ll – what's your neighbor's house number? I'll tell them it was that one instead.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Oh, perfect.
Lauren (as Quincy): Text them to land on Eric Schneider’s house.
Amanda (as Mothman): You got it.
Amanda: And Mothman pauses for a moment because he does not text and drive, you're welcome. And you see him take a cheeky little selfie and then write in the snapshot text over it. Your one-off. It's next door, the neighbor with the weird grass.
Brandon: (Gasp). Yeah.
Lauren: Amazing.
Eric: And the two – the two – the two Boston terriers.
Briggon: Insert Eric Schneider’s real address.
Amanda: Octavio, you come out of the museum. And you see Mothman finishing his snap and getting back behind the wheel to peel out.
Eric: I think that I put my arms around all three of my roommates. And I say,
Eric (as Octavio)“Oh, what a good day in the life of an Everyman. Now, let's go get those brewskis.”
Brandon: I faint.
Amanda: Great. The employees who spoke to earlier comes running out of the woods like, “They were out of Natty’s, man.” And then you see Mothman peel off into the dusk with the camper trailing dust. And then the tarp flies off. The alien mob comes into the parking lot not knowing that their quarry has just left. And, later on that evening, I don't know if you guys decide to spend it at a bar or something, because there is a lot going on next door. As Earth gets its first alien visitation witnessed by none other than one Eric Schneider, HOA enthusiasts, and his two misbehaving dogs, Henry and Herman.
[Players yells affirmatively]
Eric: Yay!
Brandon: Yay!
Lauren: Yay!
Briggon: Yay!
Eric: Mothman
Lauren: Mothman.
Eric: Mothmen.
Amanda: We're all Mothmen now.
Brandon: Yes.
Eric: Can we do – can we do like an American Graffiti style like ending credits, where it all says where we are now?
Amanda: Yes.
Eric (as Octavio): Okay. Octavio Redwine: starred in the new Seth MacFarlane feature, Everyman and Farts. It did poorly at the box office, but we got occult following on, on Netflix. He died two months later.
Lauren: Dark.
Amanda: Dark.
Brandon (as Joel): Joel: fixed the leaky sink.
Amanda: Excellent.
Brandon (as Joel): Died two months later.
Eric: Coincidentally, died two months later.
Lauren (as Quincy): Inspired by his visit to the Cryptid Museum, Quincy: opened his own Train Museum.
Amanda: Aww. Lovely.
Brandon: Died two months later.
Lauren (as Quincy): Two months later after being run over by a tiny, but very strong train.
Briggon (as Mannheim): Mannheim opened a Etsy Shop of home-crafted looks on the moon or did he?
Amanda: Did you die two months later or did you disappear two months later?
Briggon: Disappeared.
Amanda: Didn't think that, as a GM, all my players would nerf themselves at the end of the day. But—
Eric: I like it. In all of our obituaries – in all of our obituaries, we're all survived by Mannheim. That’s it.
Amanda: Great. And, and Mothman remembers you all fondly and drives by the house every now and again to make sure the grass is any length, but regulation.
Briggon: Alright.
Lauren: Aww.
Eric: Yay!
Brandon: Yay!
Lauren: Yay!
Amanda: Yay!
Transcriptionist:
Rachelle Rose Bacharo
Editor:
Krizia Casil