The LT3 are working their way into the depths of the OTA, but not everyone is happy about the progress they’re making. Vulcani and Multitool check the strategy guide. Kilonova gets emergency braked.
January Dice
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Cast & Crew
- Dungeon Master, Co-Producer: Eric Silver
- Co-Host (Milo Lane), Co-Producer, Editor, Sound Designer, Composer: Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host (Aggie O’Hare), Co-Producer: Amanda McLoughlin
- Co-Host (Val Vesuvio), Co-Producer: Julia Schifini
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is a D&D actual play podcast with tangible worlds, genre-pushing storytelling, and collaborators who make each other laugh each week. We welcome everyone to the table, from longtime players to folks who’ve never touched a roleplaying game before. Begin with Campaign 2 (The Join Campaign) for a modern, sci-fi superhero game, or marathon all of Campaign 1 (The Party Campaign) for a high fantasy story. And once a month we release the Afterparty, where we answer your questions about the show and how we play the game. New episodes every Tuesday.
Transcript
Amanda: Last time on Join the Party.
[music plays]
Brandon: The heist continues as each member of the LT3 follows their thread through the OTA. Kilonova and Lou float through floor HS all while trying to elude the government-contracted Sommelier. Charlene let Vulcani upstairs and Vulcani took that opportunity to bother Juddd Judddkins and to torch the server room, which, you know, there's probably nothing in the server room, so you don't have to worry about that. Multitool escaped Agent Golden Feather, floated up onto the roof, pushed through the barrier and met a lost queen bee. What new anthropomorphic animal can we add in this episode? Let's find out and get the party started.
[Join the Party theme music plays]
Eric: Hey, Brandon is Steven Soderbergh still just like, hanging out at your house? I know that we haven't talked to him in a few episodes, but is he, is he still there to do sound like, music for this heist?
Brandon: Yeah. Every time I asked him if he has, like, a hotel to stay at or if he's done, he just looks at me and says he paid me for the day. And then he just like, gets into my bed and sleeps under the covers, and I have just accepted my new life now. My new lifestyle.
Eric: Oh, okay.
Julia: Well, Brandon that's because he's heisted all of the hotels and so he's no longer welcome at them.
Brandon: That's true.
[Eric hums in agreement]
Eric: I think he's also heisted you now, so if he's busy, I guess we don't have to put any marimba under this, but I would like to check in with all of you of what you're doing during this heist.
Amanda: We can go from the roof down and Multitool is carrying a queen bee who's, this is, this our life now. Down the stairs and we were not detected by Golden Feathers, so we're just continuing down past the third floor with the intention of getting her back to her room.
Eric: And she's clingy and she's still rubbing her pollinated fur on your face.
Amanda: Yeah, I'm just giving her a little pat on the back as we go down.
Brandon: Which part?
Amanda: Like, between the wings.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: Right between the wing.
Amanda: Have I looked up the anatomy since our last recording? No, I have not.
[Brandon and Julia chuckles]
Eric: That's fine. That's okay,
Amanda: The thorax? The butt?
Eric: The butt? No, don't pat her on the butt. There's a stinger there.
[Amanda chuckles]
Brandon: It goes the head, The Lorax, and then the tail.
Amanda: Got it, got it, got it.
Eric: Her back. It speaks for the trees. The Lorax?
[Brandon laughs]
Brandon: It speaks for the bees, Eric. Come on.
Eric: Gah! Fuck, Brandon. We're starting this recording over. Put it on.
Amanda: One slur?
Julia: Why would you curse our podcast?
Amanda: Is Milo the new one slur?
Eric: I heard Milo's the new one slur.
Julia: Don't.
[Amanda and Eric laugh]
Amanda: Julia's like, Oh, please. God. don't.
Julia: No.
Eric: What is Val doing? Well, what's Val up to?
Julia: Val is on the second floor. Definitely not going to be telling security about the Russian woman that Golden Feather claims he saw.
Amanda: You're a great friend Val.
Julia: And feeling like they're missing something. Can I roll like, just a percept? A general perception check. Like, what's up?
Eric: Yes, you can do that. First thing, I want to know what the one slur is doing?
Julia: No!
[Brandon chuckles]
Brandon: So, Milo is currently in an elevator with Lou. And they are going down to level 01.
Eric: Yes. 001.
Brandon: And Milo is feeling excited, and anxious, and a little scared. And Lou, I don't know, probably great.
Eric: Good. Thank you for that update on what the one slurs doing. Lou? Yeah, Lou's keeping it calm. I think Lou says.
Eric (as Lou): So, I've been thinking about something that the Sommelier said. Is it worse if Dr. Morrow persona non-grata is here going through the OTA? Or is it worse if it was us like, hacking in and doing this? I'm starting, although I love the fact that you have that and you keep brandishing it like a sword, which I find fun and cool and neat. I'm worried. Is this the right– Are we making the right decision here? Is this good?
Brandon (as Kilonova): Well, I think on a metaphysical level, you never know if you're making the right decision until you figure out the consequences of your decisions. Unless you, you know, it's obviously a decided ethical point that most society agrees upon, like murder, you know.
[Eric hums in agreement]
Brandon (as Kilonova): But in a non-metaphysical point, I would argue that one, if they think it's Dr. Morrow, and not us, then Dr. Morrow gets the consequences, and therefore they're not going to come after me or you. Two, I would also argue, unless this is like, the most paranoid workplace of any time ever, or they have a system set up to like, beep an alert when Dr. Morrow specifically uses her card then like, I don't think like, anyone's– Like, you're not checking everyone's badge swipe at every moment, you know, so at least we have some time.
Eric (as Lou): No, that's a good point. I, I was thinking about what Room's Halloween costume should be when you were talking about metaphysics. But in terms of that I, like, kind of popped back in, I split my brain into two because I'm the smartest person in the Laketown City and I could do that.
Brandon: Are you telling me that Lou doesn't enjoy a good arousing discussion of metaphysics?
Eric: Brandon, I gotta tell you, no.
[Brandon and Eric laugh]
Eric (as Lou): Yeah, it's like having two hard drives going at the same time. But, you know, when you said the most paranoid, if they're the most paranoid workplace, I mean, we are, we are literally in a secret underground government, government institution, so kind of?
Brandon (as Kilonova): Yes.
Eric (as Lou): That's what I'm worried about.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Even the most secretive government institution still needs to have their employees want to work there. And if they distrust all of their employees constantly, I don't know if that's a good look, so I think there's a balance there you know? They probably check the swipes at the end of the day or something, but I doubt they're looking at every single swipe every time.
Eric (as Lou): Right. I just-- like someone-- the Sommelier noticed it, that's what I'm worried about but...
Brandon (as Kilonova): Well, that's because the Sommelier is looking at the security camera. They definitely saw us on the security cameras. Is that the question you're asking?
Eric (as Lou): No, just how do you know all this stuff?
Brandon (as Kilonova): I'm very smart. I'm-- I'm the smartest ghost in Laketown city.
Julia: Oh, my god.
Eric: Interesting. Interesting. Okay, that's fine. Okay, hey Vulcani. I think Juddd Judddkins is still on the second floor. Looking around for a secret Russian agent.
[Julia hums in agreement]
Eric (as Juddd): Be like, "Oh, if there's something I hate more than terrorists is women on the internet."
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia (as Val): I'm sorry, what?
Eric (as Juddd): I'm gonna need you to take multiple steps back before I fire-- I fire beams just everywhere. That's how I look for things. My eyes, they look at things but also, they shoot laser beams. You're gonna have to back up.
Julia (as Val): Okay, I do have a question regarding that because if you're looking at something and immediately shoot a beam at it, you can't really gather a lot of information.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric (as Juddd): No, it's more-- it's both an eye beam and also an eye beam if you know what I'm saying. Like check this out.
Eric: Juddd Judddkins takes off his-- his visor, and like, shoots. Listen, he's Cyclops. He just shoots like a red, a red energy beam like, into a cubicle. And he shoots it into a computer that's right there. And then it goes like pew and then explodes and now it's just like, a smoking hole in the cubicle.
Julia (as Val): Are you worried that whoever's desk that is going to file a complaint against you with HR because that seemed kind of like, unnecessary?
Eric (as Juddd): I've been doing this for 12 years and I've never had a single HR complaint. Also, now I know everything that's on that computer for example, password. Well, I can't tell you what the password is because it's secret.
Julia (as Val): Well, it is destroyed so it doesn't really matter.
Eric (as Juddd): Well, the password kind of carries over. Listen, you're asking a lot of questions to a-- to a guy who has eye beams, so I'm going to need to take a bunch of steps back.
Julia: I take one step back.
Eric (as Juddd): I'm gonna make you take another step back.
Julia (as Val): I'm good
Eric (as Juddd): This is a gov-- this is a special government area and I'm going to have to secure the premises or you're going to get beat or you're going to-- your beat-- your eyes are going to get beamed.
Julia (as Val): I was sent up here specifically.
Eric: Juddd Judddkins I also want to say without-- he has-- still has his visors off and he's holding it in his-- he's holding it in his hand so his eyes are closed.
[Julia hums in agreement]
Eric: So he's just looking at you but like, his eyes are closed while he's doing it but like.
Eric (as Juddd): I'm gonna need you to take a step back and tell me that you took a step back.
Julia (as Val): I've taken multiple steps back.
Julia: Val hasn't moved.
[Amanda and Brandon chuckles]
Eric (as Juddd): Fine, I'll take it. So, I'm securing the perimeter. I'm gonna need you to leave the second floor and go back down to the first floor.
Julia (as Val): Okay, what should I tell the children because I was supposed to bring back Agent Golden Feather with me?
Eric (as Juddd): That's a good question.
[Julia hums]
Eric (as Juddd): Well, why don't you-- you could just wait downstairs tell Charlene that Agent Golden Feather will be down soon enough once he's done preening after the-- as a security measure.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia (as Val): Okay, I'm gonna take the stairs because the elevators for some reason seem like they're not working.
[Eric laughs]
Eric: Interesting, interesting. I'm gonna need you to make some sort of roll on you saying that.
Julia: I mean, it's true. Who can say what the reason is?
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Who could say what it is? I'm gonna need you to roll on this because either you said something that he didn't know. Or you're doing the thing where you tell someone something and then they're like, "Oh, I heard this from a person. I'm fine with it." You know what I mean?
Julia: Okay, what kind of roll is that? Is that deception or what is it?
Eric: It's either deception. Yeah, either deception or persuasion I think is fine.
Julia: Okay, I'm gonna roll deception because I have +7 to that.
Eric: Great, that's fine.
Julia: How's a 24 sound for Juddd Judddkins?
Amanda: Ooh, baby!
Eric: Juddd Judddkins says.
Eric (as Juddd): What? Great, thank you for letting me know. If you have any other information, please run through me as a point person or let Charlene know to run through me as the point person.
Julia (as Val): Okay. Absolutely. Can I roll my perception check for the floor before I leave now?
Eric: Yeah, absolutely.
Julia: Alright, what's up with this floor? Come on. High roll, because I have zero perception. I rolled a 16.
Brandon: That's pretty good.
Eric: What are you looking for specifically?
Julia: I rolled that terrible Nat 1 on perception last time, and now it's made me nervous.
Eric: Sure.
Julia: So, I want to know if there is anything kind of that feels out of place on this floor.
Eric: On this floor? No, I think you do a kind of a scan around as well trying to avoid Juddd Judddkins as he puts his visor on and does an ocular pat down of the entire room and shoot beams everywhere. I don't think you see anything on level two. I think that you do see the supply closet. I think that that's the thing you would get with a 16. There's nothing going on here. I just think that you get-- maybe you get a lay of the land here as Juddd is kind of shooting everything and various things are turning to molten nastiness.
Brandon: What a scary workplace to work.
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: I know.
Julia: Cool. I'm gonna open that door and be like.
Julia (as Val): Oh, is this the staircase and then look into it real quick.
Eric (as Juddd): No, it's not the staircase. It's over that way.
Eric: A red energy beam goes past you to the right. Yeah, in here is, like I said before, there's a lot of different actually, you know what, I'm gonna roll on this.
[dice rolls]
Eric: All good, I rolled an 11, so Juddd had not done-- shot his ocular beams in here just yet. Yeah, it's the same thing as I described to Amanda before. There's a lot of, like, extra paper and pens and all this stuff there'd be in an irregular supply closet, but there's also you see that there's some this introductory packet. And you also can pick one up. It has the same orientation of this building.
Julia: Great.
Eric: Level three, level two, level one, B1, B2, HS. The only thing, there's also a little tuna coin that is taped to the inside of these folders.
Julia: I'm gonna take that tuna coin.
Eric: For sure.
Julia: Cool. Great. Then I'm gonna go the stairwell
Eric: Yeah, I think as you go in the stairwell, Multitool and Vulcani meet for the first time since this heist began. Vulcani looks fine while Aggie looks haggard and is holding a bee the size of a small to medium sized dog.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia (as Val): Aggie, what the fuck?
Amanda (as Multitool): I will answer all of your questions later. My-- my liege, this is my colleague, Vulcani.
Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Both of you are hearing this just in your head. It's almost buzzing. And again, Julia, Vulcani would find this, like, familiar and nice as the buzzing is similar to the buzzing you and your vibration.
Julia: I do a little bow for the queen bee.
Amanda: Nice.
Eric (as Queen Bee): Finally, someone who respects my title. And also understands that it’s a terrible situation that we're all in.
Julia (as Val): Your Majesty.
Eric (as Queen Bee): I like you. Come with me. You can be part of my court.
Julia (as Val): Yes, ma'am.
Brandon: That sounds fun. Let's play that campaign.
Amanda (as Multitool): We're-- we're getting her back. Where did you say your room was again, Milady?
Eric (as Queen Bee): Oh, yes. It is downstairs into the guest suites. I had the royal room and the other– I was able to secure things for my entire buzzy courts. The other Bolivians down there, they had to stay in different rooms.
Amanda (as Multitool): As they should.
Julia (as Val): That makes sense. Alright, let's just, like, take the stairs. See if we can get into the basement via the stairs and then see if we can get her back to where she needs to be I suppose and then see if we can fucking find Milo.
Amanda (as Multitool): That sounds great. Um, my-- my honor, do you have any sense of what-- what is happening throughout the building? It just seems that your awareness and your– your, you know, situational knowledge of all that's happening around you is unparalleled. Do you-- can you sense where a very ghostly --
Julia: Ghostly man.
Amanda: -- young man, and, um, and a very smart teenager might be?
Brandon: Your ma-- your majes-bee?
Julia: Oh my god.
Eric: Nice.
Eric (as Queen Bee): Out of all the powers I possess, being able to figure it out where people are is not one of them, unfortunately.
Amanda (as Multitool): Of course.
Julia (as Val): I mean, you can speak inside of our minds. We were just wondering if that --
Amanda (as Multitool): Pretty impressive.
Julia: -- telepathic power extended elsewhere.
Eric (as Queen Bee): Tele-- what do you mean telepathic power?
Julia (as Val): I don't know. You're just wonderful.
Eric (as Queen Bee): I also don't know. Thank you, though.
Julia (as Val): Great.
Amanda (as Multitool): That's okay. Well, we'll serve you. We do not need any thanks because, honestly, I just kind of vibe with you.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Wonderful. Yeah. Where do you-- where do you– this new party wants to go?
Julia: I think we're going to try to go down as far as we can from the staircase, right?
Amanda: Absolutely. Does the staircase and on the ground floor– does it keep going down?
Eric: Yes. So, as you descended down to the ground floor, there's like, two separate staircases, I guess. There's one that goes down on levels with three, two, and then down to one. And as you remember before, where Juddd Judddkins was-- was standing in front of the first time, there is now a different stairwell that says, "Basement levels and below." Why don't you both make perception checks? Aggie, you still get disadvantage because there's a bee on your face.
Amanda: Damn it.
[Brandon chuckles]
[Julia chuckles]
Amanda: I rolled a 3 and then a 2.
Julia: Cool. I rolled a Nat 20.
[Players cheer]
Julia: Fucking A. Oh my god.
Eric: Wonderful. I think as you're as-- you're walking down the stairs, the queen bee says.
Eric (as Queen Bee): Please don't walk so fast.
Eric: And curls around Aggie's face.
Brandon: Aw, that's sweet.
Eric: So, as you're going out, Nat 20, before you turn around the corner. You know how bathrooms are set up in office buildings? How like, for some reason, although they're on the same wall, like, the men's bathroom and the women's bathroom are like, all the way on opposite sides of the wall.
Amanda: They put them on two different sides of, like, the elevator bank. It's like why?
Eric: Never shall men and women meet whilst they are going to-- towards the toilets. Like, you know? Who knows?
Brandon: Got to keep them separate.
Eric: Gotta keep them separate. That's in the Constitution. Thank you for bringing that up, Brandon.
Amanda: Leave room for Jesus.
Eric: Yeah. Similarly, these stairs seem to be very rather far separated. So, Vulcani when you go around the corner, you see that there's someone else stationed in front of this stairwell, which is your good friend, Shannon Redwine, née Hardbody.
Julia: Like, that she got married and so now of course she’s née .
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: Yeah, and formerly known as Tuff Stuff, now Hardbody. She's standing in front, wearing sunglasses, which seems just totally unnecessary and crossing her arms in a very intimidating way. With a Nat 20, I will also say that Charlene is still at the front desk. And the kids are kind of just milling around at this point. They're kind of just, like, draped over the various, like, features of this lobby, you know? Like, sometimes they just have, like, short couches, and everything's turned around. The tree giant is sticking their leaves into the waterfall that's there, just for fun. And they're all kind of-- they're not really doing anything. They're all just kind of hanging out and on their phones and bothering each other.
Julia: Who is the closest young adult super-powered person to me right now?
Eric: Why don't you roll for that?
Julia: Okay. 11.
Eric: Wonderful. Who are you-- Who are you looking for?
Julia: I'm just looking for anyone. Perhaps the most, like, both the coolest young adult and also the most technologically inclined.
Eric: Yeah, if you're looking for the coolest child, well, I think that you look over and there's a– a short woman wearing a very, very large hat. Who is walking around and every so often throws a snowball at– at her friends.
Julia: Great. Do I remember what her name is?
Eric: Yeah. Her name is Roseland.
Julia: Roseland?
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: I think Vulcani whispers.
Julia (as Val): Roseland. Roseland, come here for a sec.
Eric (as Roseland): Yeah?
Julia (as Val): Roseland, I know-- You're on the TikTok, right, Roseland?
Eric (as Roseland): I don't-- I don't know how to respond to that. I'm gonna go yeah, yes, yes.
Julia (as Val): Do you know what I think would absolutely get you trending right now?
Eric (as Roseland): Whatever you're going to-- whatever you're going to say next, I don't believe you.
[Amanda laughs]
Julia (as Val): You should make a TikTok with Hardbody over there.
Amanda: Julia, that's so smart.
Julia (as Val): I bet she would be super into that.
Amanda: Julia, that's the smartest thing I've ever heard.
Eric: Jesus Christ. Okay.
Julia (as Val): Do a fucking TikTok dance with Hardbody.
Amanda (as Multitool): She-- yeah, she-- she's trying to rebrand. That'd be really good for her brand.
Eric: Okay.
Amanda: Aggie whispers from behind the bee.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia (as Val): Don't mind the bee.
Amanda (as Multitool): She's really narcissistic. She's really a narcissist.
Julia: Vulcani just shoves Multitool and the bee back behind the door.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eric: Are you making social media content? I would love to be a part of it. No, I'm kidding. Okay, Julia.
Julia: Yes.
[Eric chuckles]
Amanda: Help action. Whatever you have to do, help action.
Eric: Yeah. I want to give you disadvantage because this is insane but-- but Aggie-- if Aggie is giving you the help action.
Amanda: Yes!
Eric: But I will, so if this goes badly, I will make the consequence happen to both of you. So this will-- this will negate.
Julia: So it's gonna be a persuasion roll, correct?
Eric: A persuasion roll?
Julia: Can I add my fame to it?
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: I mean, why not?
Julia: Because this-- I know this child. They are-- they-- we have rapport. They know who I am.
Eric: Yeah, you can add your fame. That's fine.
Julia: Okay, okay.
Amanda: You got this.
Julia: Okay. Okay. Yes. Alright. It's a 16 + 5 for a 21.
Amanda: Yay.
Eric: Okay. Oh, Jesus, dungeons and dragons is a thing. Okay. I think Roseland-- Roseland, like, adjusts the massive winter hat covering one of her eyes. She steps into it and comes through different one of her eyes. She says.
Julia (as Val): Roseland, you look so cool.
Eric (as Roseland): I-- I know. It's because I have snow powers, okay? Yeah, I'll think about it. I'll set something up. Yeah, for sure. Okay.
Julia (as Val): Can you do it, like, soon-ish, because I feel like the other students are feeling kind of bored. And I bet they would get a real kick out of, like, watching you do this and also watching Hardbody maybe do a TikTok dance?
Eric: Okay, yeah.
Julia (as Val): Or-- or I've seen that, like, TikTok users are very good at making, like, weird surrealist horror. I also think that would be really interesting and really fun.
Eric (as Roseland): Yeah, no, for sure. It'd be super cool. Okay.
Eric: Alright, here's how this is gonna go. Here are all the things that I would balance for Hardbody here. One is, she is on the job. And there's nothing she loves more than getting paid for her services. The other thing is she's incredibly tempted by doing things like this, so I'm just gonna roll straight up, right? There's probably a 50% chance this works or not.
Julia: How many followers does this girl have already?
Eric: I think a decent amount. I just assume everyone under the age of 18 has, like, 20,000 followers on Tiktok.
[Amanda hums in agreement]
Brandon: That's correct.
Eric: So, like, it's more-- I don't think it's about the TikTok itself. I think that all these things factored in. Everything just kind of negates, like, her getting paid to do something by the need to post stuff on TikTok and having a teen think she's cool. I'm just gonna roll straight up and this would be 1 to 10 is she succumbs to doing this social media, but 11 to 20, she remembers that she's getting paid a sizable amount by the US government and she tells the child to go away.
Julia: Come on, Anubis and St. Peter, do this for me.
[Amanda laughs]
Brandon: Whoa, our --
Amanda: Val's diversifying their prayers.
Brandon: -- first in canon recognition.
Julia: No, that’s me. That's me asking Eric to roll well or not well.
Brandon: Not when I edit.
Julia: What did you roll? Amanda, what do you roll?
Eric: I rolled a Natural 20.
Amanda: It's a 20.
Julia: Fuck that! Fuck that!
Eric: I rolled a Natural 20.
Julia: Rude.
Eric: So, I think great at least great ideas. Good ideas, fundamental around, the dice does not want this to happen. Rosaland walks over and says.
Eric (as Roseland): Hey, would you-- I think you seem-- I like your Steve Buscemi one-- one piece that you're wearing. And I don't know, if you had time to do a TikTok about anything.
Eric: And Hardbody pushes down her sunglasses and says.
Eric (as Hardbody): Unfortunately, I am at work and when-- having a job is very important to me, especially when I'm defending my country. So unfortunately, I can't now. But if-- if there is something that you want, if you wanted to become, like, an intern of the Office of Technology Assessment, that's definitely something I could get-- get you in with if that's something you want to-- you want to do. Actually, you know what, let's do that TikTok. Let's do that.
Eric: And she-- she grabs Roseland's phone and pulls her in and starts recording a TikTok about why working for the United States government is good and everyone should do it.
Amanda: Oh no.
Julia: Unfortunately, that is still in the stairwell, huh?
Eric: Yeah, but she's doing it literally in the doorway as well. And honestly, it's a good TikTok. There's snow coming down. Roseland is now fully into it and is making snow, like, come down on top of both of them.
Julia: Damn it, Roseland!
Eric: And listen, the internships for US government go up.
Amanda: Oh no.
Julia: I've made a mistake. It's backfired.
Brandon: Do they make a bunch of snow puns while they do it?
Eric: The real-- the real snowman that's melting is our resolve in defending our country.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: Pensions.
Brandon: I was gonna say, like, there's snow downsides to working for the government.
Eric: That's very good!
Brandon: Yours is better.
Eric: I like yours! Yours. Mine was a long walk. Yours was right there. Yours was around the corner. Yeah, so I think that they're-- they're still standing in the doorway. And I think that now, Hardbody is definitely not moving because she's making content as well.
Julia: Who has eye-line on the bank of elevators?
Eric: Just Hardbody who's there.
Julia: Fuck. But she's distracted by making content, correct?
Eric: She is standing there though. And I did roll Nat 20, so I would say she's not fully distracted. What I would say though, is that Charlene says.
Eric (as Charlene): Hey, do you-- do you need help? I can just-- do you need any help?
Julia (as Val): Charlene, my wonderful good friend who we're going to have coffee eventually down the line.
Eric (as Charlene): Yeah, no, definitely.
Julia (as Val): I'm worried that one of the kids might have--
Julia: Actually, should I lie to Charlene or should I just be honest? I found this-- I found this bee, can we bring her downstairs?
Amanda: Yeah, I think-- I mean, it's true. Like, if the bee's supposed to be here, then we might as well.
Julia: Okay.
Julia (as Val): Charlene, my wonderful best friend who are going to have coffee eventually down the line, I was trying to find Agent Golden Feather. He was having some problems upstairs. He's currently preening.
Eric (as Charlene): Yeah.
Julia (as Val): But while I was doing that, I found this stranded bee. And she says she belongs down in Basement One?
Amanda: Aggie hats up the queen bee.
Eric (as Charlene): Huh.
Brandon: We played an entire fantasy campaign and this is the weirdest thing that we've done so far.
Julia: This bee!
Eric: Charlene, like, mouth open for a second, and then pulls herself together and says.
Eric (as Charlene): You know what, only-- barely touching the top 10 strangest things I've ever seen.
[Brandon laughs]
[Julia hums in agreement]
Julia (as Val): I imagine in this office and because you do such incredible work here at the front desk.
Brandon: Bee-cause. Why is no one making emphasis on the words of the b?
Julia: Because I'm trying to get us out of this situation and not make puns.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: I'm focused on the task at hand, Brandon.
Eric: Charlene puts an orange nail on her mouth chewing on it and then thinking about it for a second it says.
Eric (as Charlene): Should there be three of you?
Julia (as Val): There should. Are you a friend of Tuna's?
Brandon: Wait, no. Why would Charlene know I'm here?
Julia: Because she's the inside man, Brandon.
Brandon: Oh, okay.
Eric (as Charlene): So, who-- who are you missing? Because I've see-- So, because I recognize one of you from the television.
[Julia hums]
Amanda: Aggie waves from behind the bee.
Eric (as Charlene): And another one of you from being nearby on the television, but you're messed up here. And there's usually a third one.
Julia (as Val): Yes. There's usually a third one.
Brandon: He's a ghost. He's invisible right now.
Eric: He was definitely extremely not there.
Eric (as Charlene): You know whose ghost around, ghost powers. His dad used to work here.
Julia (as Val): Yeah. He-- he went on ahead.
Amanda (as Multitool): We split up.
Eric (as Charlene): Mmmh.
Brandon: God, please tell me that Charlene and Hank dated at some point.
Eric: Would you--
Julia: Hank needs to stop dating all these people that he works with.
Amanda: I think that would be an inappropriate power dynamic. Yeah.
Julia: He needs to find love outside of the office is what I'm saying.
Brandon: He makes bad romantic choices. What can I tell you?
Eric: That's true. Brandon, can you roll a D20 for me?
Julia: No, Brandon.
[Dice clanks]
Julia: Don't feed into his lies.
Brandon: 6.
Eric: Yeah, they didn't date because that would be an inappropriate power dynamic.
Julia: It'd be a misuse of power structure and, like, that's not cool.
Brandon: That's very fair.
Amanda: Nah.
Eric (as Charlene): Well, what I can help you with is I can take the queen bee for you, and why don't the two of you check out the wonderful waterfall feature that we have here in the Office of Technology Assessment? I think that would be very helpful for everything involved here.
Julia (as Val): Absolutely. Thank you, Charlene. Charlene, I owe you so much coffee.
Eric (as Charlene): You do. And tell Hank that by him leaving me here, I have no one I like at work.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia: Oh, man. I feel that. Seriously, I feel that real hard.
Eric: Yeah.
Eric (as Charlene): You should-- I'll give you Juddd Judddkins' Reddit history after this. It's bad.
Julia (as Val): Oh, my God.
Eric (as Charlene): It's-- I don't-- I can't. Just go look, go check out. Dude, go check out the water feature here. Your majesty, my liege, my queen, my royalty, I can take you down to your room. I'm sorry you were separated from your hive. I'll be able to take care of this within an hour or so. And we'll figure out how you ended up on the roof in the first place. I can't-- I can't believe that.
Eric: And she types quickly. Clack, clack, clack, clack, clack on the-- on her keyboard and invites the queen to perch on her shoulder and the queen bee lazily tumbles through the air over to her.
Amanda (as Multitool): It's been an honor serving you, your Majesty. This is my most trusted colleague.
Eric (as Queen Bee): I now-- I will knight you both protectors of the honey mill and I don't have any-- Usually someone handholds this for me, so I don't have any of the official things. There's no badge or such, so unfortunately, I can't.
Amanda (as Multitool): No thanks necessary.
Eric (as Queen Bee): Okay, well thank you.
Julia (as Val): I would like to be knighted personally.
Amanda (as Multitool): Yes, no we'll be knighted but we need the stuff.
Eric (as Queen Bee): I will provide things and we'll work on it.
Amanda (as Multitool): Thank you.
Julia: I'm writing that down on my character sheet that I've been --
Amanda: Our pleasure.
Julia: -- knighted by the Queen of Bees.
Amanda: I'd love this, like, bee-fae overlap. This is great.
[Julia hums in agreement]
Eric: Yeah.
Eric (as Charlene): Both-- I would say both of you should do look at it together and make sure --
Amanda (as Multitool): Oh yeah.
Eric (as Charlene): -- that you stick together on that.
Julia (as Val): Yes ma'am.
Amanda (as Multitool): Thank you.
Julia: We go over to the water fountain.
Amanda: We are going to nonchalantly and quickly stroll.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah. So like I described before, there's an entire waterfall just coming down, like, into this, like, very large pool fountain here in the lobby. And I think that you-- you're looking at it. It's quite nice and the big tree giant. Tree giant is still-- is still getting water just to sprinkle all over them.
[Brandon chuckles]
Brandon: It's like a shampoo commercial for trees. It's wonderful.
Eric: Oh, thank you Brandon.
Julia: That moss is so glossy now.
Eric: And it doesn't really look like any-- it just looks like this-- this large water feature is waterfall cascading down. And you look over and Charlene just like.
Eric (as Charlene): Go. Go.
Julia: I look for a key.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: I look for a platform.
Eric: Yeah, both of you make perception checks.
[Dice rolls]
Julia: 5.
Amanda: I got a 6. I'll use my last luck point.
[dice rolls]
Amanda: Fuck. 12.
Eric: 12. I think with a 12, you look over. You– you don't see anything and Charlene says.
Eric (as Charlene): Don't either of you have any imagination? Look behind the waterfall.
Julia (as Val): Oh, like in Jurassic Park the second one. Okay.
Julia: And then Val like.
Eric: Teah, that specific reference. Yeah. Like, that. Only about one. Yeah.
Julia: Val walks through the waterfall.
Amanda: Aggie too.
Eric: Yes. So, as you both walk through in the waterfall and you just kind of, like, you take a step forward and it's just like you're walking into nothing. But you can still just, like, your feet keep landing as you're doing it together. And then behind you, you feel like-- like the pressure change. And you turn around and the lobby isn't there anymore. And you keep just walking through the darkness. And you just take a step more, and more steps forward. It's like someone is turning up the brightness on a television screen, and everything comes more and more into focus. And now you're standing on this metal ledge looking into nothingness. And you see these large cubes arranged in the air. And you are now on HS, HopScotch.
[midroll music pings]
Eric: Hey, it's Eric, I have a pair of boots that I purchased with my first paycheck for my first job out of college. I was teaching and they hadn't had gotten me like, in the system yet, so they gave me a month's worth of salary in one paycheck, which was more money than I'd seen in at all like, at any point in my entire life. I bought these boots; I've had them for over 10 years. And recently, they've kind of been a little... gotten a little worn. So, I brought them to, like, a boot guy like, a leather guy, and he resold them. And he made it. He gave it structure again. And then the laces were all frayed, so I bought new laces. And now in February where it is very cold here in New York City, I get to lace up with shoes that I've worn for 10 years, but they almost feel like new again. Welcome to the midroll. They're like magenta, so like they kind of pop on my black boots. And I really like that. We've said it before and we're gonna say it again. Woweeeeee! You have stepped it up for the Patreon. Thank you to all of our new patrons who have joined the drive to 600. Amanda A., Oscar, Dana, Hope, Megan, Ross, Christopher, Amy, Anthony, Jeremiah, Samantha, Grant, Amanda, Joseph, Richie, Mars, matleena, Ethan, Joan, Nikita, and Sarah K. We've talked about the drive, the campaign to end bad Tuesday's stretch goal three if we hit 600 patrons, we're going to commission a giant comic book cover of all the PCs and NPCs for Campaign II. We've talked about this, you should definitely keep joining at patreon.com/jointhepartypod, become a patron, join up, we really love that. But I really want to point you towards our merch store where you can get January Dice right now. A bunch of you have gotten your hands on it, some of you haven't yet, but we can encourage you. They are just as spicy as the Chad Dice. They are adorable. They have January's little face on it if you roll a Nat 20. 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Every week, mythology buff Julia and her childhood best friend and my fiance, Amanda, get together to learn about a different story from a mythology and folklore over drinks. There's everything from mythological origins of major franchises like Lord of the Rings and Wonder Woman to modern urban legends to a roundup of werewolf stories from around the world. And you know, there's a lot of Pokemon episodes which Eric Silver on it, which I think you should listen to. You should listen to the ones of me. You should listen to the episodes that have me in it, or any of the other 250+ episodes released over five years. Dive in at spiritspodcast.com or listen to Spirits where you download your podcasts. We are sponsored by Athletic Greens. I am still struggling with how dark it gets in the winter. I love the cold but just like, not having the sun makes me so sleepy so quickly. Our environment affects us in all types of ways. 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[midrolls music pings]
Julia (as Val): Alright. Tight.
Amanda (as Multitool): Would have-- would have been a lot easier if we knew this-- this existed.
Julia (as Val): Super would have been right? You know? At least Charlene told us who the fuck she was. That would have been bad otherwise
Amanda (as Multitool): Friend of Tuna? That was really good.
Julia (as Val): Thank you.
Amanda (as Multitool): We should get-- we should get, like, jackets or something.
Julia (as Val): Oh my god. Yes!
Brandon: Oh, no. Don't give Tuna that ego!
[Amanda chuckles]
Julia: Like the silk ones that are embroidered on the back. I love that. Mwah.
Amanda: Like-- like those pink ladies.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: We should make that merchantable. It's pretty dope.
Eric: It's good. Yeah, you look around. There's nobody here. It is just as I described it before for Brandon. It's just this kind of nothingness, these cubes hanging in the air. And I think that's a good time for me to pop over to what Milo's doing
Brandon: [to the tune of Girl from Ipanema] Bop bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.
Eric: And the doors open, and it says.
Eric: [in a robotic tone] Welcome Dr. Cassandra Morrow to OUBLIETTE 1, the educational exploration and practiced development.
Brandon: Hey Eric, how the fuck do you spell OUBLIETTE? And what the fuck does it mean?
Eric: OUBLIETTE is spelled OUBLIETTE. It is basically a dungeon under a dungeon. Specifically, it only has, like, one in and out. It's like, you know, you go into a dungeon and then there's a trap door, and then there's another dungeon inside of it. The only way to get in and out is that trap door, is an OUBLIETTE.
Julia: Don't like that.
[Amanda hums in agreement]
Julia: Don't like that in a heist.
Eric: Two down on 01 here. And the decor in this floor is different than the other ones before. Like, you have the office stuff on the other floors. The decor of OUBLIETTE 1 is closer to something of HopScotch, the hopscotch level. How everything was just, like, dark and dank in said cement and just, like, had a creeping feeling that you're not supposed to be here. And something can just pull you into an abyss this entire time. I feel like it's similar with this. There's not great lighting down here, especially when you're so deep below the ground.
Brandon: So, OSHA has never seen this part.
Eric: Yeah, exactly. OSHA definitely has never seen this part. You think the OSHA inspector can traverse those cubes? Absolutely not. There's a lot of metal, it's a lot of chrome, especially here on 01. I think there's also, like, not great lighting. There's, like, just halogen lights that are more spaced out than they should be. There's, like, one unit of halogen lights and then there's, like, 100 feet down the hallway. There's another thing of halogen lights. And the thing that's standing in your way is this very very large metal door. It's shining and glowing as much as possible in the-- in the dim light here. It seems like it shined to an impeccable degree, but like, it's kind of fit in as, like, teeth almost. Like the metal slats fit into each other. And there is a panel kind of inset into the large metal-- metal doors that's spanning the entire, like, it is blocking your way to spanning the entire thing in front of you. And there's also, like, a little keycard screen in front of you as well.
Brandon: Remind me what the elevator said again when we stepped out.
Eric: OUBLIETTE 1 Educational Exploration and Practice Development.
Julia: Those words mean nothing.
[Brandon chuckles]
Brandon: I'm pretty sure that's an alien name from another planet. It was the most common alien baby name of 2019.
[Eric chuckles]
Julia: That's a really silly joke.
Brandon: What I'm debating whether or not I want to just be, like, nope fuck this and go down to the next one or not.
Eric: Sure Yeah, yeah for sure. I think that this-- this metal door is quite a far-away down this hallway. It's like 1000 feet down you got to, like, walk a whole football fields to get down to this me-- this, like, very large large metal door.
Amanda: I mean, my instincts are telling me the most dangerous and secret things are in the bottom one, right?
Brandon: Probably.
Julia: I mean, probably. I also bet 100% that this hallway is one of those, like, infinite hallways.
Amanda: Yeah, right?
Julia: And like, you're gonna get trapped there or something.
Brandon: A real House of Leaves situation. I'm going to turn to Lou and say.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Lou, Rock Paper Scissors me, if I win we go to this room, if you win we go down to the next one.
Eric (as Lou): Okay. That's how you want that. That's how you want to decide it.
Brandon (as Kilonova): I mean, do you have other information that I don't have?
Eric (as Lou): Yeah, I've been working for the Office of Technology Assessment the whole time and you're under arrest.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: Adorable.
Brandon (as Kilonova): You're fine Lou. Alright.
Eric (as Lou): Thank you.
Brandon (as Kilonova): 123 shoot. Ready?
Eric (as Lou): Okay. Rock Paper Scissors.
Brandon (as Kilonova): I said 123 Shoot. What is happening?
Eric (as Lou): Who got-- who doesn't go rock paper scissors shoot?
[Brandon chuckles]
Brandon: Alright, fine.
Eric (as Lou): We're from-- everyone at Laketown city does Rock Paper Scissors shoot. What are you talking about?
Brandon (as Kilonova): Fine, fine, fine. Alright. Rock, Paper, Scissors. Shoot.
Eric (as Lou): Rock, Paper, Scissors. Shoot.
Brandon (as Kilonova): What did you have?
Eric (as Lou): I did paper. What did you do.
Brandon (as Kilonova): I have rock.
Eric (as Lou): Oh okay.
Brandon: So, next floor it is, baby.
Eric: Alright, next floor. Let's do it.
Brandon: So, we get back in the elevator and I swipe Dr. Morrow's card again, and I press 02.
Eric: Cool. Alright. Yeah, you scan it.
Julia: Yeah, fuck your puzzle.
Eric: And again-- I don't care. You can do whatever you want.
Brandon: Welcome back to it.
Eric: It's fine. The elevator then descends and it says.
Eric: [in a robotic tone] Dr. Cassandra Morrow now going to OUBLIETTE 2.
Eric: The girl from Ipanema.
[Eric harmonizes to the tune of Girl from Ipanema]
Julia: No one knows the lyrics to the song.
Eric: And the elevator then jerks to a stop.
Julia: In a different way than it has in the past?
Eric: Well, you're not there, Julia.
Julia: I'm just asking.
Eric: So, I wouldn't-- I wouldn't be able to tell you.
Julia: I'm just asking world building questions here, Eric.
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: The doors don't open I assume.
Eric: No. This has been shorter. Like, I've said it's taking like a minute or so to descend every single time but this has been after a few seconds and it jerks to a stop. Like, you and Lou are kinda, like, thrown a little bit.
Julia: Oh boy, Sommelier caught up with you, I think.
Brandon: Um, Milo, like a toddler in an elevator just slams on 02, like, 40,000 times.
Eric: Wonderful. Make a perception check.
Brandon: How's a 25 sound?
Eric: 25 sounds good.
Julia: It doesn't sound like a Brandon roll.
Eric: I think I even-- even as you're distracted by slamming on the 02, maybe you have, like, better sense of-- of space because, you know, you can float through things. But like, you get a sense that something big is coming down towards you.
Brandon: Ah, okay. When I'm doing this perception check, do I notice that there's a cutout in the top of the elevator?
Eric: Yeah, for sure. There's-- there's an emergency exit.
Amanda: There's an OSHA mandated emergency escape hatch. Yeah.
Eric: Thank you. Yes. Thank you, Amanda.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: I think yeah, there was an emergency escape hatch right above you.
Brandon: Okay. Um, Lou has a jetpack, right?
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: So, with my spidey sense tingling, I'm going to turn to Lou and say.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Lou, get on your jetpack, go up there now, open that hatch and get back up to this floor and get out please. As fast as you can.
Eric (as Lou): I-- You don't need-- you don't need me?
Brandon (as Kilonova): Go now.
Eric (as Lou): Okay, that's fine. Alright. Uh, see you later. Don't die. Fucking deuces, okay.
Eric: I'm gonna roll.
Amanda: Oh, Lou.
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: Lou, don't you fucking-- Can I-- Uh, I'm gonna cast guidance on and give her a D4.
Eric: Okay.
Julia: I don't think that's gonna help if she rolled a Nat 1.
Eric: Okay.
Amanda: Eric, you're the Dungeon Master. You can make whatever you want to have happen happen. And if what you say is Lou goes home and has a nice dinner. You can just say that.
Brandon: Yeah, her jetpack just, like, goes nos level and just, like, shoot straight back home.
Eric: Lou smashes her initials on her Jansport as the jetpack mechanics come out. It buzzes to life. She shoots up to the top of the elevator and throws open the hatch. And she waves to you. She gives you like a-- like a small quick salute. And as she flies up you hear.
[exploding noises]
[ominous music plays]
Eric: And you see just the blue green only of kitchen appliances from the 1950s. And you see that there's, like, some chrome sticking out from the-- from what you see as well. And you see just Lou's hand is draped back inside of the hatch. I rolled a Nat 1 for Lou to escape and you hear.
Eric (as Sommelier): I said don't move and you decided to move, so I-- so I had to come down here. Re-- I had to come here fast. And I rode a 1950s refrigerator to do so. If you're in the way in an unsafe-- in an unsafe place that is unfair. And that is unfortunately not my problem. Someone's already gotten hurt. You better get out right now.
Brandon: Well, Eric, luckily you gave me this wonderful ability that Tuna has called Alter Timeline where all damaged dice can be changed to the number one.
[Amanda gasps]
Amanda: What?
Brandon: At least once per long rest so...
Eric: Holy shit.
Brandon: At least we know that Lou is not dead.
Julia: Holy shit.
Amanda: Oh.
Brandon: So I think what happens is Tuna comes out and gives Lou a good lick, you know?
Eric: Sure. Okay. I'll tell you because I think it's just part of the power. I rolled 10 D6.
Brandon: Oh my gosh.
Eric: I'll tell you Lou has more than 10 points of damage.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: I also say that the amount of damage I would have rolled brought her down to zero.
Julia: Jesus.
Eric: So then Tuna gives a little lick and then you see Lou's hand. It's just like.
Eric (as Lou): No, stop. It tickles. Stop. It's like sandpaper.
Eric: So, Lou is, like, flailing her arms. So, the Sommelier-- we, like, kind of zoom out and we see, like, a comic panel of what's happening. And also, the elevator is, like, swaying and creaking. The Sommelier in her little black dress is standing on top of a blue green 1950s massive refrigerator that has landed on top of Lou. Lou is trapped under the refrigerator. The refrigerator is blocking the escape hatch now but her hand is still dangling down.
Brandon: As I have, you know, thrown Tuna up essentially to go help. I give them my anti supernova orbs to carry in their mouth.
Eric: Oh.
Amanda: Ooh.
Brandon: And use them on Lou, so now objects pass through Lou.
Amanda: Oh, hell yeah.
Brandon: And I'm gonna have Tuna, like, pull Lou out from under the refrigerator.
Eric: Hell Yes. Wonderful. Okay.
Amanda: Damn Brandon.
Eric: Tuna, like, wrangles the two orbs and puts them in Lou's hand and then you see Lou just, like, disappear and then the refrigerator go.
[refrigerator thumps]
Eric: As Lou then can float, like, I guess you see, like, the outline of Lou fall through the top of the-- of the elevator. She's like.
Eric (as Lou): Oh my god, I saw my life and someone else's life go before my eyes. I hate that.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Lou, I am so sorry. I did not mean-- I did not think that will happen. I apologize to you. Let me go kill this person real fast.
Eric (as Lou): Oh, okay. Yeah, well, you shouldn't know put people in harm's way that they shouldn't have. Again, this is bad. This is bad shit that you're into Milo. You're getting way, way, way too deep. There's only one way in and one way out call the OUBLIETTE.
Brandon (as Kilonova): I'm gonna cast Gash on the Sommelier.
Amanda: If not for the crushing the kid that whole entrance is, like, was kind of hot.
Julia: It was very cool but...
Amanda: It's very cool.
Julia: Did try to murder someone that we love and care about.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah.
Eric: You cannot see her within range because the refrigerator is blocking it and you're just hearing her.
Brandon: Alright, seems like a technicality we've never used before.
Eric: It's literally-- it's literally the first sentence of the spell.
Eric (as Sommelier): Here's what we're going to do. You're just gonna stay there. And uh, and as I'm gonna get my way back up, and then, like, the government forces is just gonna rang you up. How does that sound? That sounds good.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Hey, Sommelier.
Eric (as Sommelier): Yeah?
Brandon (as Kilonova): Fuck off.
Eric (as Sommelier): Okay. I'll see you later then.
Brandon (as Kilonova): No, you don't cuz' I'm going to then cast something else.
Julia: Brandon, before you do that, she has to leave out the room that Amanda and I are currently in.
Brandon: Oh, I'm going to kill her. Is that a problem?
Julia: I mean, kinda from, like, a moral perspective. Yes.
Brandon: No. I'm going to murder her. She tried to kill my friend Lou, so...
Julia: Cool. She's still a government agent and we are trying to heist not kill our way out of here.
Brandon: Well, my mission just changed and it's to kill this-- this person so. Unfortunately.
Julia: Can't wait for a fugitive Milo the story arc then.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia: I'm looking forward to the arc where we all have to, you know, act as witnesses at Milo's trial.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: Make a perception check for me.
Brandon: 28.
Eric: You hear sounds of springs. Like, boing, boing, boing.
Eric (as Sommelier): Like, alright, you better stay there. I'm gonna get away. Or I guess I'll talk to you later. Bye.
Eric: And you hear.
[spring boings]
Brandon: Uh, Milo is pissed.
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: And so, just like when a superhero loses their temper like Batman and, you know, says I'm Batman and punches to the left.
Eric: Yeah, sure.
Brandon: Milo is gonna cast Insects Plague. And what that is for Milo is he's going to call upon, like, every ghost soul within the Ghost Realm to swarm a 20-foot-radius fear centered on a point I choose within range. So, it's within range. I don't have to be able to see it.
Eric: Sure.
Brandon: And you must make a constitution saving throw and if you don't you take 4 D10 piercing damage and half as much on a successful one.
Eric: Hell yes. Okay.
Amanda: I like it.
Eric: That sounds great. I'm going to figure out how fast the Sommelier is going. And since you're blind casting this out there. You're kind of just, like, doing it out there. Do you have a place you just want to do it the farthest you can cast it? Like up the elevator shaft?
Brandon: I assume she hasn't made it up 20 feet yet so I'm going to cast it, like, the center of the sphere will be 10-feet from the refrigerator.
Eric: Okay.
[dice rolls]
Eric: Will you make a wisdom check to see as you're trying to throw this sphere of terrible angry spirits on her if you are able to maximize it hitting her as much as possible.
Brandon: Cool. 21.
Eric: Hell yes, wonderful, okay, now I'm going to figure out how many times she's stuck in this thing. And then I will figure out how many saves she makes.
Brandon: Cool.
[dice rolls]
Amanda: This is a hella cool plague of locusts.
Eric: Alright, this 20-foot sphere is difficult terrain. I will say as we pan up as she's trying to escape. The reader sees the springs are engulfing her feet and she's using it to bounce from one side of the elevator shaft up and up and up.
Amanda: Moon shoes? That bitch.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Because this is difficult terrain as her-- and her trying to jump through angry spirits, she will take-- I have to make three saves as it hits her three times.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: As she passes through. I need to make a 17.
Brandon: Yes.
Eric: Alright.
Julia: Constitution, right?
Eric: Constitution, yeah. She is an experienced superhero.
Brandon: Constitute.
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: Constitute. I'm going to give her +3, alright?
[dice clanks]
Amanda: So, you have to roll a 13 or lower to fail.
Eric: Oh bud. I rolled a 17 a 20 and an 18. She still takes--
Amanda: No.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: I cannot believe that. I've never rolled that well in this entire game. She still takes half of 4 D10 three times.
Julia: That's pretty good.
Amanda: It's pretty good.
Brandon: 54.
Eric: That's-- is that halved?
Brandon: No, that's total.
Eric: 27 Ghost damage. You can only imagine what she saw on there as she springs through a roiling sphere of angry spirits.
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: And then we see our spring as we-- there's another panel of just her inside of the ghost sphere. And I think, like, it's in reverse colors. Like, we see white is black.
Amanda: Like in release? Yeah.
Eric: Yeah, white is black. Black is white. And you see that as she's passing through, and then she springs out with just, like, a horrified look on her face.
Amanda: Did she see the spirits of all the children she bullied?
Eric: Yeah, probably.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: And maybe people that she's killed in various places on behalf of the United States government and maybe villains of Laketown city. And as she springs, continues to spring from left to right and left to right, up and up and up the elevator shaft and she's gone. I think Lou is just, like, floating in the elevator now.
Amanda: Dare I say it, might the spell surge help? Would the spell surge do anything?
Brandon: Oh, yeah.
Eric: Oh yeah. Give me that spell surge.
Brandon: Thank you.
Amanda: Sorry to remind you of the mechanic.
Brandon: Of course, I rolled poorly. Now that's a three and I hit it.
Eric: Nice.
Amanda: Listen, it could be good.
Julia: Could be great.
Amanda: Could be good.
Julia: Could fuck her shit up.
Brandon: Good god.
Amanda: Could be a nursery.
Eric: Brandon, please roll a D 10 for me.
Brandon: 3.
Eric: As Milo you angrily cast the– the spirits from out of nowhere. And I think that there is a certain-- there are also spirits that engulfed you as you did that inside of the elevator shaft. And I think that Lou pops back into, like, corporeal form, like.
Eric (as Lou): Oh, so did we both have to go. We both had to go in corporeal to do this?
Eric: And as you look down, you see that you floated down into the actual elevator, and you have clipped into the elevator.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Your leg is currently stuck in the elevator, and I would say that you are stuck. Literally attached to the elevator for five minutes.
Brandon: God dammit. Alright. Okay.
Amanda: No.
Julia: It's okay, we'll come get you and we'll pull you out. It's all good.
Amanda: We'll come get you. Yeah. We're close.
Eric (as Lou): Ah. You know, I thought you were-- I'm gonna be honest with you because I just almost died. I thought you were a goofy idiot. And now I know you're a goofy idiot who's incredibly powerful.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Lou): So, I'm gonna do something to help you out. Just hang out. We're gonna-- we're gonna figure that-- we're gonna figure this out.
Eric: And Lou, like, fishes out some, like, steampunk gas goggles from her backpack. Be like.
Eric (as Lou): I'm gonna-- I'm just gonna fix the elevator really quick. Really quick. Is that okay? Are you good?
Brandon (as Kilonova): I'm good. I'm just gonna take a break for a second.
Eric (as Lou): Yeah, no, you do that. Definitely.
Brandon (as Kilonova): Yeah. Thank you.
Eric (as Lou): I'm just gonna work. I'm just gonna work on this stuff.
Brandon (as Kilonova): I appreciate that.
Eric (as Lou): Wonderful.
[dice rolls]
Amanda: Hey, good, good.
Eric: Ha! I rolled a Natural 20 because I gave advantage to an arcana check for Lou. Lou's like.
Eric (as Lou): You know what, let's-- let's see if I can make this not Dr. Morrow anymore. Let's-- let's see if I can do that.
Eric: She puts on the jetpack again and floats up. She floats up and there's, like, some mechanics up on the ceiling down there that you can access that's not smushed by the-- by the refrigerator. And she moves things around and see, like, beeps and boops and, like, she pulls out, like, a welding kit from her backpack for a second. And she says she's hacking into the mainframe a bunch of times. And...
Amanda: Does she, like, unplugged the– the refrigerant coil and, like, plug it into the elevator?
Eric: Yeah. 100%. Yeah, for sure. Be like.
Eric (as Lou): You know what, there's actually, like, a little bit of plutonium in these old refrigerators.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eric (as Lou): And she's like, "Okay, let's fix this now."
Eric: [in a robotic tone] Juddd Judddkins, you are now going down to OUBLIETTE 2.
Eric: And the elevator, like, whirrs back to life and, like, jerks for a second and then slowly starts to descend as someone is singing the Girl from Ipanema.
Brandon: It's Milo.
[Brandon harmonizes to the tune of Girl from Ipanema]
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: Hell yes. Let's quickly go back to Multitool and Vulcani. You are now looking out on this massive dark chasm with these cubes. Maybe you're sizing it up and you look over the side of the-- of the darkness that spans into nowhere. And then you hear.
[Sommelier grunts]
Eric (as Sommelier): Hold on.
[Sommelier grunts]
Eric: And then you see the total opposite side of the room. The elevator doors are being wrenched open by, like, two crowbars. You just see, like, the ends of these red crowbars, and then you see the Sommelier who looks haggard and pale. And she says.
Eric (as Sommelier): Okay, so I know all of you are here. Fuck!
[Join the Party theme music plays]
Transcribed by: John Matthew M. Sarong