It is the best day of the week at Tragic the Gathering, your friendly local books, games and mysteries store—Wednesday, new comic book day! And Tragic is the only place to get the newest issue of SLaM, a new superhero comic written, lettered, inked and printed by the two owners.
Finally, they've gotten past the origin stories and the intro, and we're going to see how a calculating professional hero, a bright-blue-haired government agent, and a man who can see the fabric of space and time, work together.
This is a one shot using subclasses from the new NO CAPES reskinning guide! Check it out, and get the stats to play these classes and many more at home, at http://jointhepartypod.com/merch
Housekeeping
- Multitude Live is happening on the internet on July 30! 25% of all sales will go to the Black Lives Matter Global Network. Get your ticket so you can watch live or catch the replay afterward at multitude.productions/digitallive
- Check out our new merch, a Campaign 1 phone wallpaper bundle and “Don’t Talk to me Until I’ve Had my Coffee and my RPG Podcast” mug, at jointhepartypod.com/merch
Sponsor
- HeroForge, your source for custom minis. Visit HeroForge.com to start designing your custom miniature today!
Find Us Online
- website: jointhepartypod.com
- patreon: patreon.com/jointhepartypod
- twitter: twitter.com/jointhepartypod
- facebook: facebook.com/jointhepartypod
- instagram: instagram.com/jointhepartypod
- tumblr: jointhepartypod.tumblr.com
- merch & music: jointhepartypod.com/merch
Cast & Crew
- Dungeon Master, Co-Producer: Eric Silver
- Co-Host (Arnold Palmer aka FutureProof), Co-Producer, Editor, Sound Designer, Composer: Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host (Olivia Oxford aka Moxie), Co-Producer, Editor: Julia Schifini
- Co-Host (Agent Smith), Co-Producer: Amanda McLoughlin
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is a collaborative storytelling and roleplaying podcast, powered by the rules of Dungeons and Dragons. That means a group of friends create a story together, chapter by chapter, that takes us beyond the tabletop to parts unknown. In the first campaign, we explored fantasy adventure, intrigue, magic, and drama. In the newest story, we tackle science, superpowers, a better future, and the responsibility to help others.
Every month, we sit down for the Afterparty, where we break down our game and answer your questions about how to play D&D and other roleplaying games at home. We also have segments at the beginning of each campaign to teach people how to play the game themselves. It’s a party, and you’re invited! Find out more at jointhepartypod.com.
Transcript
Eric: It is the best day of the week at Tragic: The Gathering, the friendly local game store mystery bookshop and comic book store in Lake Town City. While some would argue that it's Friday, because it's Nevermore games review day. Where they open the back room for playtesting, and they vote never or more, and that helps with the inventory.
Brandon: That's incredibly nerdy.
Amanda: I just have to cancel this whole project because Tragic: The Gathering is so funny and bad, I love it!
Eric: Thank you! But everyone knows that the best day of the week is Wednesday, because it's new comic book day! And at Tragic, as everyone just calls it, is the only place to get the newest issue of SLaM! A new superhero comic written, lettered, inked, and printed by the two owners of the store, and it's set in an incredibly recognizable setting, Lagoon Borough Berg or LBB.
[Everyone laughing]
Eric: But finally we are at issue 6 of SLaM, they've gotten past the origin stories and the intro, and we're gonna see how a calculating professional hero, a bright blue haired government agent, and a man who can see the fabric of space and time work together. Welcome to SLaM Issue #6: A Shocking Revelation.
Amanda: Oooh.
Julia: Oh no, uh oh.
Brandon: Oh no, there's gonna be some electric enemy here.
Amanda: How’d everyone with electric damage? Cause I’m not great.
Julia: Uhh.
Eric: Hello!
Brandon: Hello!
Eric: We're doing one shot, I'm Eric Silver I'm the dungeon master, and I would like to tell you about a superhero thing that I put together! I've been working on a guide called NO CAPES: a D&D World Building and Reskinning Superhero Guide, from everything that we were doing with Campaign 2 and I wrote all that stuff down from the conversation I've been having with everybody and the one that we had with Brennan Lee Mulligan, only a little while ago. I wanted to show everyone how it worked a little bit and we're gonna do a one-shot using subclasses that I came up with in NO CAPES.
Julia: Muahaha.
Amanda: Weee! You also casually described the essence of every class in D&D which I wish I could have read at the beginning of Join the Party, because I was like “oh yes this finally tells me how all the casters are different because I never knew!”
Eric: Thank you, I really appreciate that. After talking to Brenden Lee Mulligan I really saw this like separation between the genre of Dungeons and Dragons and the game mechanics of it. I'm like oh this is just how you do a role-playing game that involves a lot of fighting. But like magic is just like power, and superheroes have power but that doesn't mean it's like purple light that turns into a fireball. It can be so many other things, so I really end up breaking down what it is to rip the fantasy genre off of the game, and also distilling classes down to their superhero elements. I think it ended up becoming like everything in Join the Party, really good for new players.
Amanda: And that is for sale at join the party pod dot com slash merch. But our friends at Hero Forge were kind enough to sponsor a bonus episode where we could just play for everybody and drop it in the feed, and that is so exciting! Along with them we've little minis of each of our characters so you can see that on our Instagram @jointhepartypod.
Eric: They're in color!
Amanda: Just so pretty!
Branon: Thanks Hero Forge!
Eric: Thank you, Hero Forge! So we're doing a one-shot where everyone is level 10, so you can see a lot of the stuff that happens in the subclasses. Let's go around and introduce your characters, and also give a quick origin story of your superhero self. Let's start with Ghoulia!
Julia: Okay!
Amanda: And the wolf inside Ghoulia, known as the pro fighter.
Julia: [Posh accent] Well gentlemen, Olivia Oxford before she became a superhero, was a lady modern-day Don Draper - the misogyny she was a high ranking advertising executive who while visiting Copenhagen to help with the marketing campaign for aquavit found a Scandinavian Norse shrine. She was then granted the fiery power and a big ol sword of the god Loki, who named the sword in honor of his wife the sword was called the sword of Glod.
Eric: What's your superhero name, and what's your costume?
Julia: Olivia Oxford goes by the name of Moxie. and you can see her that's a fair attire similar to some pro football players gear but a little bit more muscled because she is in fact very strong. Eric: Amazing alright we got moxie our pro hero Amanda why don’t you go next?
Amanda: I am today fulfilling my lifelong dream of just playing Phil Coulson. So my character is named Agent Smith. First name Agent, last name Smith.
Julia: Sure, makes sense.
Eric: Now are you Agent Agent Smith?
Amanda: Don't worry about it. Agent Smith to you.
Brandon: Agent Smith Smith?
Amanda: If you're nasty.
[Eric laughing]
Julia: Oh no, oh no.
Amanda: Agent Smith is a mission control artificer, meaning that I have lots of powers to be able to support and assist from a safe place. Either from HQ or from further back you know behind friendly lines as my heroes go forth into the field. I work for SLaM and I am just an agent here to make sure that nobody gets hurt, and civilians are unharmed, and all the proper paperwork is filed at the end of the day.
Eric: SLaM stands for Superhero League and Management.
[Brandon and Julia laughing]
Julia: Incredible!
Amanda: [with a refined and formal tone] You don't expect so much management training to come in handy with superheroes, but it really does. I have blue hair, I am wearing a well-fitting suit that is actually much more stretchy than it appears for any unexpected running, and shoes that appear to be ballet flats but actually are very grippy. On my lapel is a brooch of a beetle that if I activate it becomes my robot sidekick, and I can cast spells through it, I can attack through it and keep me safe while I participate in fighting.
Eric: Wonderful! Alright Brandon why don't you tell us what's going on with your lad, and then we get to do some fun pre-session stuff because of your subclass.
Brandon: Yeah! My character's name is Arnold Palmer,
[Brandon and Julia laughing]
Amanda: BRANDON!
Brandon: He is not the golfer, nor is he a drink. But he is a chronomancer. Arnold was just a mild-mannered regular old computer technologist, no one’s quite sure what the actual backstory of Arnold's superhero abilities is. Including Arnold because at some point during his time as a person he saw the fabric of space and time and—
[Everyone laughing]
Brandon: And he started writing down his experiences in his journal which he calls his “Big Book” and one day he realized that he hadn't written some of the things in the Big Book. So he's not sure what's the past, what's the future, what's the present and he has become extremely apathetic because of it.
Julia: Oh no.
Eric: Amazing. When I was making the mini for Arnold I did use this like sci-fi get up— because Hero Forge you can do a bunch of different genres with it. So I was looking at all the sci-fi stuff and it's like oh this is just like some like baggy drop crotch bodysuit, and I'm just like oh no this is what's super fashionable in 2055. Like believe me.
Brandon: Yeah, yeah!
Amanda: So are you from the future?
Brandon: I— who knows?
Amanda: Okay, okay.
Julia: Who’s to say!
Brandon: What is the future?
Eric: When the past, present, and future are the same when are you really from?
Brandon: Exactly, and Arnold when he's in the field goes by FutureProof which was really cool in 1999.
Eric: Wonderful, and you are playing the chronomancer school of magic for the wizard?
Brandon: Right, exactly.
Eric: Hell yeah, alright Brandon, we're gonna start with some subclass stuff for the chronomancer. First you're gonna roll some portent dice from the subclass feature: Do I Know This Story? Basically we're gonna roll 2 d20’s, and you are able to replace those D 20s for any attack roll, saving throw our ability to check made by you, or any other creature. You may also use both of those portent dice at the same time to tell me what happens during that situation.
Brandon: To take narrative control!
Amanda: Ooo.
Brandon: Alright, I'm gonna roll my dice.
[Dice rolling]
Eric: Don't tell me what it is, don't tell me what it is! Because it's your secret.
Brandon: Alright, I'm gonna write it down.
Eric: Because it's you applying your will to the fabric of time and space.
Amanda: No big deal.
Eric: And then the second thing you do is the power Help Yourself Out. Where I want you to tell me one specific action that you think is going to happen during this session, and if you get it right you may add or subtract 1 d6 to any time that action happens during this session.
Brandon: This is the best power it's like—
Julia: So cool.
Amanda: I want it in real life.
Brandon: Yeah so tell me if this is specific enough, but I think that I'm going to go with the storyline that Moxie is going to have like a super important punch, or kick, or block of some kind that is like make-or-break for the party, and they're going to miss their roll. In story terms they are going to make some kind of fail. Like they're going to either miss the block, or miss the the hit, or like slip on a banana peel or something like that.
Julia: [Laughing] Thanks!
Eric: That's very good, I like that. I think if Moxie has to do something that is incredibly important, and fails you can then add 1d6 to that. I'll give you that for sure, cool.
Brandon: I think it has to be specifically like a physical failure.
Julia: Gotcha, so like a strength check or something like that?
Brandon: Yeah!
Eric: Yeah I love that! Because this is a one shot, and if you were doing this in a larger campaign you would know more people, and it could be about relationships and other stuff.
Brandon: Right.
Eric: But because this is the one shot, that totally works. Wonderful so we're gonna dive into the one shot, but first I have some questions about where it is you guys live. In my head in Lagoon Borough Burg is your ordinary like a metropolis type city. But I always like to think that you three as the majority superhero team here, or at least the one we're following in this story. You have some sort of base or bunker. So where do you think you guys, and I don't know, I doubt Agent Smith lives there, but at least where is your place of work?
Julia: I like that that just makes the FutureProof roommates, that's fantastic.
Brandon: I think Agent Smith what do you got I mean this is your—
Amanda: Yeah I think I have an office in the SLaM Federal Building like you know a very normal office building downtown. But I feel like maybe there was a pizza place, or a deli that we all liked so much, or like a sushi restaurant with a great lunch special, that when they decided to let out their back room with its own separate entrance around the corner as an office, it was like a no-brainer.
Brandon: I love that.
Julia: I love this idea that that's what the government can afford. It's just like the back room of a sushi place. Not the whole tower.
Amanda: No, I’m talking the apartment over the sushi restaurant. It's like a two bedroom with a big living room, and you guys live there, you might have another residence but that's where you crash, and then you have desks. Agent Smith does not like going there so often because it is much less fastidious than her own office. But that's where we chill.
Julia: I would like to point out that Moxie has a penthouse apartment somewhere else, all of that ad exec money. You know occasionally at night I crash there
Amanda: Totally.
Brandon: And I just want to point out that no one's quite sure where Arnold lives or sleeps, and he's never once used a door he just appears.
Amanda: Oh.
Julia: It's very intimidating.
Eric: Wonderful so yeah, you have an office which is on top of Rocl and Roll, which is this sushi place it has an amazing two rolls and dumpling special for like $12.
Julia: Hell yeah, unlimited sake when you order more than $10 of sushi as well.
Brandon: Oh wow.
Eric: Oh yeah, there’s this all you can eat all you can drink sushi and sake deal.
Amanda: The combos come with soup and salad.
Julia: Hell yeah.
Brandon: I want to amend my statement and say that Arnold has never left the sushi restaurant.
[Everyone laughing]
Julia: He’s simultaneously always in and also never in the sushi restaurant.
Brandon: Exactly.
Eric: I think that the only other question is do you have someone who runs the office? Like you have a sidekick or a COO, or a butler who is hired out to maintain the office?
Julia: I have a former secretary who is now our Butler!
[Everyone laughing]
Amanda: Excellent!
Eric: Beautiful!
Julia: He came with me when I left the ad agency.
Eric: Beautiful! What's his name?
Julia: Charles.
Eric: Charles!
Amanda: Excellent.
Julia: Charles! He used to go by Charlie, but now that he is a Butler he goes by Charles.
Brandon: [Laughing] Charles.
Julia: It's very important to you know, have a name that fits your stature.
Brandon: That's true.
Amanda: Extraordinary.
Eric: I think Charles Redberry how's that?
Julia: Excellent.
Eric: Wonderful!
Amanda: Now it's a Redburry.
Eric: Redbury.
Brandon: Redbury.
Eric: Charles Redbury! Alright, wonderful!
[Upbeat arcade music]
Eric: I think that the three of you are at your secret headquarters above Rock and Roll so this is like Issue Six, so I think that you are all like living here, it's been a few months since the inciting incidents that pulled you all together. We got through your origin stories like we're finally easing into the regular day-to-day of superherodom in LBB. I think this is a regular sort of day Charles is like there isn't a lot happening right now like we're not in emergency mode so he's just like stacking papers. He's setting up an inbox and outbox.
Julia: Beautiful.
Eric: And he has like an old Mac, like one of the ones with the color it's like aquamarine.
Julia: Oh my god.
Brandon (as FutureProof): [With a deep gruff voice] Charles I would— I would put a paperclip on those ones, they're gonna fall later.
Eric (as Charles): Uh what are you talking—oh god damnit. When you mean later, I didn't know you meant right now.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Look, I've been sitting on it for a couple hours, but I'm tired.
Eric (as Charles): Alright, okay thanks FutureProof. I guess I’ll pick this up.
Eric: So uh, what do you think is your three favorite parts about the office?
Brandon: The smell of sushi roll it.
Julia: Always smells like soy sauce and it's delightful.
Amanda: I feel like it's on the corner of like a town square, or like a central block so I really appreciate the good vantage point and good sight lines.
Julia: It's within walking distance from my penthouse.
[Everyone laughing]
Eric: Amazing. Yeah I think that Arnold you're down at that Rock and Roll, and Agent Smith you're looking out, you're on like guard duty.
Amanda: At the window, little spyglass yeah.
Eric: You're taking shifts only with yourself, I think Moxie you're walking in late like with a bag of croissants, because you can just roll out of bed whatever you want.
Julia: this is a recurring pattern for Lake Town City huh?
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: No, this is Lagoon Borough Burg!
Julia: You’re right, excuse me.
Amanda: LBB.
Eric: I think that Arnold inside of Rock and Roll, and Moxie outside and Agent Smith inside, you all see all of the power go out in the neighborhood. It's like you're inside and the power just goes out suddenly in Rock and Roll, and then you two looking outside you see them just like on the block everything is out of power.
[Music stops]
Brandon (as FutureProof): Crap.
Julia (as Moxie): Well that's extremely not good.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Charles you know what to do.
Amanda: And I would like everybody please to picture very like John Wick, hotel clerk vibes where Charles is extremely trained by now, and is sort of on guard duty for the office but I'm gonna run downstairs and go out onto the street to look around.
Eric: Yeah for sure Charles picks up like a machete that he has under his desk and he’s like
Eric (as Charles): Got a boss!
Eric: Everything's just out, I think that you can see that a bunch of people are coming out of their houses and their apartments like looking around seeing if everything is out. That's really all you can see, like it's not like a transformer exploded like that's the only thing it looks like is that something is out.
Brandon: I walk out of the restaurant and join Agent Smith, finishing up my my box of sushi.
Brandon (as FutureProof): So what do we—is just like a normal thing that happens in this time period?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Not quite.
Amanda: I'm gonna turn a little bit and say into my wristwatch communicator
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Any reports of power being down?
Eric: Yep you're not getting any reception back I don't know if like they're also down or they haven't gotten their backup generators up but you're not getting anything from SLaM either.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): That's not good.
Brandon: Eric can I look in my book? The Big Book of everything that happens now then in the future, and see if anything's written in the book about this?
Eric: Sure why don’t you make a history check.
Julia: While he's checking his book Moxie walks up and is like
Julia (as Moxie): I have croissants. What's going on?
[Eric and Brandon laughing]
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: Oh geez 13 +9 for a 22!
Julia: Hoo! It’s nice to be a level 10.
Eric: Level 10 baybee! Alight with the 22, so in the modern beginning of the 21st century when power goes out it is usually because of The Electric Company. It's not like things just go out like he does in 2100 because electricity is scarce and the aliens feast on the energy, and it wasn't like when Tesla was doing it and just kind of messing around and blowing things up. So if there is something going on it's probably because of The Electric Company.
Julia: Do you reiterate that to us?
Brandon: Yes. In those exact same words.
Brandon (as FutureProof): It's probably not Tesla—
Julia (as Moxie): Okay, I’m sorry. Aliens feasting on human flesh?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I cannot reiterate to you what a problem it is that you tell us these things.
Julia (as Moxie): It's really rather concerning!
Erix: I would like everyone to make a perception check.
Julia: Oh no.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I'm sorry I'll try to be more sensitive in the future.
Eric: Or the past wherever we are.
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: 18.
Julia: I got a 7.
Brandon: 12.
Eric: Wonderful so Amanda you can do your special perception stuff.
Amanda: Yes, so when I roll a perception check at 15 or higher I can ask one question from
“what here can I use to do somethin?” “Who or what here is the most dangerous?” “What needs help the most?” and “How can we get this done safely?” I am going to ask what needs help the most right now.
Eric: Wonderful so I think that you look around and it seems like people are calling The Electric Company and nothing really seems to be the problem. There's nothing on fire, it's not like they’re down electrical wires. You look in the alley behind Rock and Roll that has the circuit breaker and you see that there is a little robot thing running around. It looks like it's about one foot tall, and it has a robotic like nondescript face, and it has like little points coming off of the top that could be horns, but can also be an electrical plug.
Brandon: [Chanting] Robot Pikachu! Robot Pikachu! Robot Pikachu!
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: It's more like a robot Elekid if you really want to get into it. So yeah it seems like it's like over near the circuit breaker which is not good.
Julia: I'd like to stab it, with my sword.
Eric: Do you just want to stab it?
Julia: Yes!
Eric: Alright make an attack roll!
Julia: Excellent, oh sorry first I have to summon my giant sword which appears in a fiery flash of light.
Amanda: Great.
[Eric makes lightsaber noises]
Julia. Then I'm holding a giant eight foot long sword.
Brandon (as FutureProof): That's dope as hell.
Julia (as Moxie): Thank you.
Julia: It is a 22.
Eric: Yeah 22 hits, let's do damage. Your amazing flaming sword does 3 d6 cutting damage, plus 1 d6 fire damage.
Amanda: Incredible.
Brandon: I like cutting damage.
Eric: Plus your strength modifier.
Julia: So it's 18 damage overall, it was 4 fire damage.
Eric: Yeah I think with18 damage, immediately you just bring this buster—
Julia: I stab it, like skewer it. That is my goal, to skewer the thing, so we can examine it further.
Amanda: [In a posh tone] Like a chunk of pineapple on a BBQ.
Julia: Exactly.
Brandon: Moxie's terrifying.
Amanda: I love it.
Eric: Your footlong buster sword isn't great for skewering, but you like just chop off both of its arms. and it goes [mimicking an R2-D2 scream] and it sorts it tries to run away.
Julia: Alright I'm gonna take my second attack on it then.
Eric:Alright do it.
Julia: It's a 13, plus— is it +12, Eric?
Eric: Oh that hits you’re fine.
Julia: Alright cool so
[Dice rolls]
Julia: 2
[Dice rolls]
Julia: 6
[Dice rolls]
Julia: 11 slashing damage, and then 6 fire damage, +4. 15 +6, 21!
Eric: Hey Moxie, how do you destroy this small robot child?
Julia: I skewer it because it didn't work the first time!
[Brandon laughing]
Eric: [Laughing] So yeah you skewer it, the heat is fully skewered and it was like toasting the robot looks at you, and you fully destroyed this thing but it's like last like energy it has it then starts just yelling at the sky it's like:
Eric (as little robot): I have done my work for beelzebot! The azamothius, Lilith 2000, Molluck out of my browser CPU to low keystroke, I have done his bidding! And then it just explodes and please take 9 points of damage.
Julia: But it's all the way out on my sword, and my sword is very long.
Eric: That's a good point, take 4 points of damage.
Julia: Thank you.
[Everyone laughing]
Amanda: Do any of those words ring a bell for me from files I've read at SLaM?
Eric: Yeah why don't you make a history check?
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: An 11.
Eric: You know I'm actually gonna use my reaction to add my intelligence modifier to the role making it in 19.
[Julia ooo’s]
Eric: Okay with a 19, you know there are a lot of things like just devils and demons that come into your purview at SLaM, but it seems like there's also a technological component. There are just a lot of like devil puns but also computer puns happening you know?
Amanda: That part I got as Amanda.
Eric: I know, so there are like evil computers, and there's like demons, but you don't have anything that like combines the two.
Amanda: Okay.
Brandon: Eric can I cast the spell called legend lore?
Eric: Yeah sure.
Brandon: Which is a 5th-level spell.
Amanda: Ooo.
Brandon: I name or describe a person place or object the spell brings to mind a brief summary of significant lore about the thing I named. It consists of current tales forgotten stories or even secret lore that has never been widely known it has to be of legendary importance, and the more information I already have the more precise and detailed the information I receive is. Front it's accurate but couched in figurative language.
Eric: Perfect okay that's amazing, so as Agent Smith is kind of running through like files it's like wow alright I have devils and demons, and there's like a dog devil and there's—
Julia: Tell me more about the dog devil!
Eric: There's like all these different types of devils, but then you get to there's a robot devil. So as computers become more and more advanced especially in the future, they created a cosmology around themselves, which unfortunately mirrored a lot of Catholic imagery and ideas. So there is in fact a God computer the true motherboard, which mirrors what we’ll understand, the Father, Son, and CPU of course.
Julia: Oh god.
Brandon: Jesus fuckin Christ.
Amanda: So both of and not of this world. They’re in and around everything they are and are not corporeal.
Eric: It's in binary. It's 0 1 and the 2. There is in fact a robot devil although there are stories about the robot devil, but again much like Catholic cosmology does the robot devil actually exist, or is it actually just an allegory for bad things?
Amanda: Who can say?
Brandon: So I write the names that I hear the little robot Elekid in my book and receive that information back, and I share it with the team and I say:
Brandon (as FutureProof): Ugh, this fucker—
Julia (as Moxie): Have you run into this thing before?
Brandon (as FutureProof): I've not personally heard of em.
Julia (as Moxie): Ah okay.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): It's still very hard for me to trust intelligent sources that even you don't know where they come from.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I mean, it is what it is you know.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Well if they are worshipping at the altar of Technology, and Computing and something goes wrong with the electricity, it seems to me the heart of this matter must lie at the power plant.
Eric: Wonderful—
Brandon (as FutureProof): That’s where the Zapdos it.
[Eric laughing]
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Ah yes—
Julia (as Moxie): You know I ran the Pokemon marketing campaign in the United States when they first came out.
Eric: Oh were you responsible for those airplanes that had Pokemon on it?
Julia (as Moxie): I was! every Pikachu you see at a Thanksgiving Day Parade? That was me!
[Eric and Amanda laughing]
Julia: This may be the best character I've ever come up with guys.
Brandon: Very good, Julia.
Eric: It’s very good.
[Transition note]
Hey, it's Amanda. I think I'm the only person who drinks hot tea during the summertime and I gotta tell you I love it there's nothing like sitting in front of an air-conditioner drinking a warm beverage, that makes me feel both extremely American, and also very very lucky and warm on the inside, the cool on the outside. Which is kind of the best combo possible so welcome to the midroll we're drinking darjeeling!
Thank you to everyone who has joined our Patreon in the last week: Mona, Koi, Lucas, Yasiri, Allie, Saphrina, Kathryn, Anna, Emma, Anuntxi, and Jo!
We’re so grateful for each and every person who supports us on Patreon. You literally make it possible for this to be our jobs, and we could not do it without you. Every episode we release bonus content like bloopers and character backstories, including a playlist Eric made for the Knight of Mirrors last episode. It absolutely slaps. To get access to all of these benefits and to help ensure we can keep making this show, join us for as little as $5 a month at patreon.com/jointhepartypod.
Also, exciting news! Multitude is hosting a digital live show on July 30, with 25% of all sales going to the Black Lives Matter global network. All of the Multitude hosts will be performing a mix of new segments and old faves in Multitude Live, and trust me, this is not something you’ll want to miss. Head over to multitude.productions/digitallive to buy your ticket. And if you can’t make the live stream at 8:00 P.M. Eastern on July 30th, you should buy a ticket anyway, because we’ll send you a link to watch the recording afterward. Support a great cause and enjoy our patented podcast variety show at multitude.productions/digitallive
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And now, let’s get back to the show.
[Transition note]
Eric: Agent Smith on your SLaM piece, hah, you get just like I guess it's backwards-compatible with all types of communication so you get a little note from SLaM that says trouble at the power plant, investigate.
Julia (as Moxie): Well a little late, thanks SLaM!
Eric: Alright and you guys can all go to the power plant, it's a little bit outside of town but nothing too difficult. How do you three get there? I'm just interested.
Amanda: Oh I definitely have a jet black government issue Camero.
Julia: It's matte black too, it’s not even like shiny black. It's like a hot matte black.
Eric: What's the license plate?
Amanda: It is randomly generated, how dare you. I will never give someone identifiable details.
Eric: Smart, it has diplomatic plates but it changes for every single country which it could be. Yeah you three up go to the LBB power plant everyone, is standing outside this is like in the middle of the day, where they should be inside trying to fix what's going on but the foreperson has you know like the white construction hat on and just like has their their hands on their hips and it's just like
[Eric groans]
Julia: Does he have a name tag on?
Eric: Yeah they have a name tag, it's um you know, wouldn't you be surprised that it's Micks Foreperson.
Julia: Oh wonderful!
Julia (as Moxie): Well Micks Foreperson, good afternoon we hear you have trouble at the power plant!
Eric (as Micks Foreperson): Ah, ordinarily I would not need extra help at the power plant, because as you might know from my last name, I am a foreperson but I'm very glad you three are here. There is a some sort of creature just in there drinking the energy away from the city, and we need your help.
Julia (as Moxie): Does it seem like a robot demon by any chance?
Eric (as Micks): I did not look close enough to know the demonic place where it came from, it was just electric, and scary. So I ran away.
Julai (as Moxie): Fair enough, excellent choice, you did good citizen!
Brandon (as FutureProof): Good move.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Good instinct. If you would please help us by clearing the area, and getting all of your staff, and any civilian visitors well out of the way, we will handle it from here. Eric (as Micks Foreperson): That sounds great to me I don't have to go near that thing.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Keep your hardhat on though, there is a rock that will hit you in like 23 minutes.
Eric (as Micks): Oh thank you, I will keep an eye— appreciate that so much. I will say when we saw it up when we saw it approach, it didn't run up it kind of shot forward as if it was energy, so I don't think that we should let it out of the power plants. It seems like if it is distracted enough by the deliciousness that is in front of it— just don't don't let it out of the power plant. He kind of made a big hole, you can see over to the side and like on the side of the power plant there's like a giant hole but if you go in through there I think that it's gonna scare it off and it might just start running amuck in the city and and drinking all of the power this is just the power for the in the south of LBB, if you go through there's a secret entrance that goes in through the supply closet. I think that we've isolated it apart. It's drinking the energy out of the R&D department and it's going to stay there. I think we do have some time before it drinks all of it but you need to move fast.
Julia (as Moxie): Well I think we should have a conversation another time about why there is a secret entrance to the power plant, but for now let’s move on!
Eric (as Micks): It’s not to the power plant it's to the R&D department.
Julia (as Moxie): Still, still, very concerning citizen not going to lie to you.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Do you happen to have any empty high storage batteries? That might be a good way to contain it.
Julia (as Moxie): Oh we were gonna ghostbusters this shit? Excellent.
[Brandon laughing]
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I don't know that reference.
Julia (as Moxie): Okay, of course you don't.
Eric: Let me roll on that let me see if they have something for you.
[Dice rolls]
Eric: Okay yeah, I think Micks Foreperson gives you an extension cord being like
Eric (as Micks): There is no actual battery, but maybe this extension cord will help you?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Is it a surge protector at least?
Eric (as Micks): Oh yeah it's like totally wrapped up in rubber and stuff.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Okay well then there is some local storage as I understand it.
Julia (as Moxie): Hmm.
Eric (as Micks): Yes.
Amanda: I will lasso it up, and clip it to my belt with like a utility clip that came out of nowhere.
Eric: Okay, so the way to get to the R&D department through this way is you walk in through the front the power plant is so eerie. When you look at a place that should have people and doesn't have people he's like there's negative space here. Like you can hear a pin drop, you only hear like the light buzzing of energy that is still going at this moment.
Brandon: You can hear each grain of sushi rice fall from FutureProof's mouth as he continues to eat the sushi.
Eric: And you do hear a like fairly loud slurping sound coming from a corner of the power plant.
Brandon: Oh that’s bad.
Julia: Disgusting and rude, excellent!
Amanda: I'm gonna cast arcane eye high up on the ceiling as close as I can get it to the noise.
Eric: Wonderful alright so that's one of your subclasses for the Mission Control, so you can free cast arcane eye, and your arcane eye is an actual robot that helps you. So what does it look like?
Amanda: Yes on my other lapel is a little bee, and I take it off my lapel and I sort of like frisbee throw it into the air toward where I want it to be, and it unfurls from like a static be with its wings tucked in to a just beautiful mechanical dark grey with little yellow detailing bumblebee, and instead of the sort of two bee eyes it's like one of those sunglasses that's a continuous panel it looks like very futuristic.
Julia: A visor?
Amanda: Yeah! It flies 30 feet from me up toward the ceiling so it's camouflaged against the darkness to look down over wherever this creature is.
Eric: Wonderful okay so I think that within 30 feet there is the door to that storeroom that a Micks Foreperson was talking about, and you can open that door because it is an actual physical object, it can't just pass through walls. You can send it in in front of you.
Amanda: Is there a ventilation panel?
Eric: Why don’t you make an investigation check for that?
[Dice rolls]
Amanda: I got a 24, is that good?
Eric: Yeah! That's very good yeah there's an air duct that goes through the door that the foreperson directed you towards.
Amanda: Yes oh I'll send the arcane eye through that to pop out into the room.
Eric: Wonderful make it dexterity check for me on behalf of the arcane eye.
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: I got an 8 total.
Eric: Okay with an 8, so your lil bee flies up there and goes bzzz, and you can see what's happening it's flying through the air vent, and it gets about like halfway in and then you hear like a bzzzz, and it shorts out.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Well that didn't work as planned.
Julia: Oh no..
Eric: What you do see though, you see that there is like a shock of lightning like arcs through the air duct, and shocks it, and then it goes out.
Amanda: [Sighs] Okay.
Brandon: Eric are there any like computer terminals or anything in this room?
Eric: No not in this particular room, I think that you're really just in the atrium that leads off to like this storage closet, so you're not really in like the technical area just yet.
Brandon: Okay.
Julia (as Moxie): Well when in doubt darlings, I say we just kick the door in, and start punching things so any opposition to that?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Nope, let’s do it.
Julia: Alright and I kick down the door.
Eric: You open the door this is just a—
Julia: Oh I kick down the door, I don't open door.
Eric: You kick down the door and go ahead just go whoop, and you hear like just shelving fall to the ground, and you look in there and this storeroom looks like it's just been ransacked. It's like they have those metal shelves that are pushed, you know those are just like really big IKEA metal shelves you see like some are pushed over in different directions, and there's kind of like stuff all over the ground but there is a path to another door which is on the other side of the room. Just like if you lightning that is arcing through the air ducts you see that dancing all over the metal shelving through the room is just this electrical current that sparks and jumps. There's stuff everywhere and you see that you could make a path to the other side, but it looks pretty dangerous.
Julia (as Moxie): Well darlings, I have a sword and I can't really attack electricity.
Brandon: Is it just like wild sort of electricity or is it like seem to be emanating from something?
Eric: Ah good question make an investigation check!
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: 16.
Eric: Okay that's good you don't know where it's coming from, but you can see because it is electricity it seems to be really attracted to the shelving in the room.
Amanda: And we can't sense any kind of creature or central point?
Eric: No, it doesn't seem to be any central point, it's like maybe it's coming from another room, maybe it's coming from a different place, but right now the thing that is like in your face is the electricity that is centered around the shelving.
Julia (as Moxie): Can we change the shelving into something else?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I can't do that, but I can detect magic.
Amanda: I am going to reach up and push a very discreet button on my eyeglasses which has the effect of casting detect magic. I can see a thin aura around anything that is casting magic nearby including through walls.
Eric: Wonderful! Okay you can see that the electricity is coming from the other room, I think you have like UV vision, and heat vision, and like elemental vision! You see that it the energy is coming from that other room on the on the other side of the door. So it's like it's going through the wall through whatever that seems to be the energy locus.
Julia (as Moxie): Well it seems the thing we need to destroy is in the other room. So apart from me trying to jump through electricity which I'm sure I could, do magic man?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Yeah I'll take—I'll take a look.
Brandon: I'm gonna cast misty step, so I can teleport up to thirty feet into an unoccupied space that I can see.
Julia: You just wave goodbye to Arnold Palmer.
Brandon: Yeah, yeah, let's see.
Eric: What does his teleportation looks like for you?
Brandon: I think through his journeys through space-time, and the fifth, and six dimensions he's sort of it ends up being based on like nanotech. So you can sort of see almost like little bug friends sort of like dissolving his body but it's just like this nanotechnology that sort of from this head to his toes just sort of dissolves really quickly. Almost like a terrible PowerPoint transition, and then it just shows up in the other spot.
Julia (as Moxie): It is horrifying every time he does that isn't it?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Mmhmm.
Eric: Yeah with 30 feet, yeah you're at the other door.
Brandon: I'm gonna open the door and look inside, just just like peek.
Eric: Make a Constitution check for me,
[Julia snickers]
Julia: That's not good!
Brandon: A non-national 20.
Eric: Wonderful!
Julia: Ooo, a dirty 20!
Brandon: A dirty 20!
Eric: I don't know if you knew—
Amanda: Gritty 20.
Eric: I don't know if you knew in the future that electricity can go through door knobs and you knew that this one was electrified so maybe you wrap your hand in your sleeve, I don't know however you want do it, but you resist the shock as it comes through the door knob.
Brandon: You know Eric it's just that Arnold has become so laissez-faire about life, that he's just not shocked by much anymore.
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: Terrible! It's terrible!
[Brandon laughs]
[Suspenseful bass heavy music]
Eric: You open the door and you see there is this robotic gollum with horns, or are they an electrical plug? But this one is like five feet tall, and it's just like its mouth is on a generator and it's just like sucking on it.
[Amanda aww’s]
Eric: And you can see in the room this is an R&D department, so there is kind of just inventions kind of like everywhere, it seems like there's just like tech kind of scattered about the room. It was like pushed off of desks and everything. This is also like a pretty large room, I'll just tell you it's 50 feet by 50 feet and it's all the way on the other side of the room, on the right side right in the middle of the right side is a giant hole that maybe someone ran through as it was looking for something to eat.
Brandon: Hmm okay can I use my artificers lore proficiency skill can I make a history check on the technological devices to see if I know anything about them?
Eric: Sure go ahead Brandon's character is a reskinned gnome so that's why you have it. But really just someone who can see tech into the future.
Brandon: I'm also very small.
Eric: Like a gentleman's five foot one.
Brandon: Exactly!
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: 9 +13, so 22.
Eric: I'll just tell you what's in there, it sounds like they're working on just some things that could be pretty parr for the course of 21st century cool tech. There's like a turbine that seems to be like the size of one of those like you know one of those big box fans, there is an AC unit in there that sounds like someone was tinkering with, there was like a 3D printer, there is like a very small laser cannon it kind of looks like a Megaman cannon, and there's a strangely there's a Zoltar machine in there too. You know like from the movie Big?
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah there's a Zoltar machine in the corner.
Brandon (as FutureProof): In the year 5420, Zoltar machine is the height of technological advancement so it makes sense.
Eric: Right there's one in every home. You're seeking, and what are the other two what are Moxie and Agent Smith doing?
Julia (as Moxie): Well I'm tired of being in this room.
Julia: So I'm going to can I do like an investigation check where I can spot like parts of the floor that aren't touching metal and kind of like hop skip and jump?
Eric: Bang bang, let's make the investigation check, and then the dexterity check you'll have to do to avoid touching metal will be higher or lower.
Amanda: Is carrying an action?
Julia: I was going to sling you over my shoulders if I'm able to do it and if you want me to move you into the next room.
Amanda: Yes, you should.
Julia: Would you like that? Alright excellent! Well I rolled an 18 for my investigation check.
Eric: Wonderful what's your dex modifier?
Julia: 0 and I get disadvantage on dex, but can I do acrobatics?
Eric: Yeah you can do acrobatics!
Julia: Okay cool, I'm gonna do some cool flips, and we'll do acrobatics, also swing Agent— no I won't sling agent Smith over my shoulder, I'm going to cradle her like an infant, and then—
Amanda: I know what to do I tuck my head.
Eric: Okay so you do get disadvantaged on this because it is dexterity, but you may use your acrobatics. I'm gonna say the dc is 15,not to touch any metal.
Julia: Okay, so my lowest roll was a 12 +4 so it's a 16. Yaaay!
Amanda: Yaaay!
Eric: Hell yeah, alright so 16, yeah you definitely—even though you're you're usually too big for these types of small moves, and your costume pokes out because you just you can't not have the shoulder pads.
Julia (as Moxie): Fun fact, I took a semester of ballet at Juilliard.
[Everyone laughing]
Eric: While cradling Agent Smith in your arms you definitely dodge in between the metal shelving, and you don't get shocked and you make it to the other side of the room.
Julia: I'm humming a song from Nutcracker in the entire time.
Brandon (as FutureProof): That was impressive.
Julia (as Moxie): Thank you, I tend to be.
Brandon (as FutureProof): You want to take a peek in this door?
Julia (as Moxie): There is a giant monster, that is concerning.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Yeah.
Julia (as Moxie): Mmm so I would love to kill it how do we feel about that? We feel good about me stabbing this thing yes?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Yeah I feel good about that.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I feel that we should first try to just smear its forehead, because if it's activating character a word is written there we smear it off it should deactivate.
Julia (as Moxie): I have no idea what you're talking about.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Oh I can try to hack into it, is that what you're trying to say?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): No like like boop it on the forehead.
[Eric laughs]
Julia (as Moxie): Hmmm, can we hack it to make it stop moving, therefore making your plans seem more plausible?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Yeah I could— I can definitely do that.
Julia (as Moxie): Excellent.
Eric: Wonderful, alright so what do you do? You're at the doorway.
Brandon: Can I make a perception check or investigation check to see if I see any like computer terminals?
Eric: Sure.
[Dice rolling]
Brandon: 17 +1 so 18.
Eric: Yeah I think someone must have ran out, and forgot their laptop in there for sure
Brandon: Okay so I'm gonna sneak in there as quietly as I can and grab the laptop, and then I'm gonna cast—
Eric: Ah well let's hold on, hold on one moment why don't you make a stealth check for me sir! Julia: One moment, I think you're wonderful, and I believe in you, and I think you can absolutely do this, and I'm going to use teams are better than a solo act, and give you a d8 inspiration die.
Amanda: Oooo.
Brandon: That's a great power.
Eric: I'm gonna make a perception check, and you make a stealth check.
[Suspenseful music continues]
[Dice rolls]
Brandon: Ahah!! Oh my God, alright I got 19 +8 which I rolled on your d8
[Amanda and Julia cheering]
Brandon: And +1 so 28 does that do it Eric?
Eric: Yeah you beat your stealth, I rolled really well. I rolled it 23 so goddamnit.
Brandon: Well I think what Arnold can do is sort of like quickly move through a higher dimension, so it's just that the monster can't perceive him because he's on a different plane. Eric: That's fair, also this electric golem seems to be sucking super hard on this generator.
Julia: Nom nom nom nom nom!
Amanda: I'm picturing like a soft-serve machine with just like a mouth right below it.
Eric: Oh a hundred percent yeah, a hundred percent what I was saying, yeah it's just like “laaallallala” just drinking does all the watts. So yeah you sneak in and grab the laptop.
Brandon: I'm gonna smash it with both my hands flat until I'm able to hack into the mainframe. I'm gonna cast hold monster which I choose a creature when I see within range they must exceed on a wisdom saving throw, or be paralyzed for the duration which is one minute.
Eric: Do I make multiple saves over time?
Brandon: At the end of each of its turns, the target can make another wisdom saving throw, on a success the spell ends on the target.
Eric: Wonderful so just you know I'm gonna say since we’re not in combat yet I say if I can make it save every ten seconds, so you guys will have to move fast okay.
Julia: Okay.
Brandon: Cool.
Eric: So I make a wisdom saving throw?
Brandon: Yes and you have to beat 17.
Eric: Wonderful.
Julia: Tight.
Eric: So you smash the laptop, and then what does that do to hold the monster?
Brandon: Yes so I'm smashing the laptop with both of my palms flat, as hard as I can, and as quickly as I can.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I saw someone do this in 2432.
Julia (as Moxie): Alright.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): How is it that you know when all things happen in all years except for this one?
Julia (as Moxie): It’s wild, isn't it?
Brandon (as FutureProof): No, I do know. I just can't tell you exactly. I can't live the moment and also explain the moment, it's complicated.
Brandon: And it's just gonna send a huge surge of electricity through the machine enough that it's gonna like overwhelm this monster, and sort of paralyze it for 10 seconds.
Eric: Cool yeah okay so I rolled natural one, so this monster is held yeah I think that it's like has its mouth on this generator like it's a soft-serve ice cream cone machine and it's held there. So you all need to move fast before I roll again so what would you like to do?
Julia: Moxie is just going to grab Agent Smith and like hoist her up and be like
Julia (Moxie): Alright darling, here we go shoot it in the head! Thank you!
Amanda: Great I'm going to pull my cannon a pistol off of my ankle holster, set it to— much like a phaser, I can set it to just like blunt, almost like an intense like air cannon instead of projectile, and I want to try to shoot it in the middle of the forehead to wipe away any mark that is there.
Eric: Why don’t you make a perception check?
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: 8.
Eric: Okay with an 8, although it is described as a golem, you have mythological and cryptid training from SLaM, this is not a golem in the traditional sense it does not have a word on its head.
Julia: Why don't we just shoot it in the head then?
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia (as Moxie): Excellent then I'll drop you, and then I'll slash it with my sword!
Eric: Alright yeah you guys want to do damage?
Amanda and Julia: Yeah!
Eric: Okay why don't you attack it.
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: Does a 19 +9 do anything?
Eric: That does hit.
Julia: Mmm mmm mmm.
Brandon: I like level 10, we should stay at level 10 all the time.
Amanda: Alright that is an 8.
Eric: Alright you do 8 points of damage, it doesn't look like it did much you did the damage, but like this is a scary electrical battle golem thing.
Julia: That's a shame I did roll a 25 and then a nat 20 though so.
[Eric and Brandon laughing]
Eric: Alright, roll the damage.
Julia: I'm going to roll my regular attack first, the one that didn't crit so 15 damage on the first roll. Then for the crit I do double damage, plus an additional one d6 right?
Eric: Hell yeah, do it.
Julia: Yeah okay so 3, 2, +4 is 36, plus my additional one d6 alright it's a 38 total.
Eric: Woo 15 +38, alright!
Julia: Should I just break out the action surge and do another attack guys or later?
Eric: What I need you to do, please roll a constitution saving throw.
Julia: Okay I'm good at that alright it's an 18 +6.
Eric: It's like fire, electricity, and everything's like bursting out into this giant electrical burst—
Julia: My eyes are glowing red.
Eric: As you come down on this electrical golem, you feel like an electrical surge come through your sword, but you were able to like grit your teeth and stave it off and it does not affect you.
Julia: It's because I'm a pro!
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: Wonderful alright yeah so you've done a lot of damage to this lad, it has held so Julia if you want to do an action surge you can.
Julia: If you tell them as well I’ll just wait until the next turn.
Eric: Now I want everyone to roll for initiative.
Julia: Okay 9!
Amanda: 7.
Brandon: I got a natural 20!
Eric: Yaaay! Is hold monster a concentration?
Brandon: Yes.
Eric: Okay so yeah,
Brandon: I'm just gonna keep concentrating on hold monster.
Eric: You can go later in the initiative you’d like.
Brandon: Yeah I'll just defer.
Eric: Okay just tell me when you want to hop back in!
Brandon: Okay!
Eric: It is now the electrical lad’s turn and he's going to make another wisdom saving throw what was it again?
Brandon: 17.
Eric: Yeah I got lower than that so the monster is still held.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I'm really good at at typing.
Brandon: And I'm smacking with both hands.
Julia: Not even actual typing just smacking with your hands.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Good work FutureProof!
Eric: Amazing alright so now initiative count 10, and I am going to roll for the power plant.
Julia: Oh no layer actions guys.
Eric: I rolled a natural 20. Now that the electrical monster is no longer sucking on the generator, the generator seems to be overclocked and it's whirring, and like electrically screaming and it shoots out a bolt of electricity ,and since I rolled a 20 and Brandon rolled 20 you're gonna get hit by that electricity.
Julia: Oh no.
Brandon: Yay!
Eric: FutureProof take 22 points of electric damage as a lightning bolt arcss through the air and just shocks you.
Julia: You okay bud?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Oh, yeah not the first time.
Brandon: And I’m down from 65 to 43.
Julia (as Moxie): Has anything been the first time for you? That's just a general question?
Brandon (as FutureProof): I mean what is time? Like not really a place for a philosophical argument on what the third dimension is so—
Eric: And I want you to make a concentration check.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I'm just saying it would be convenient if at any point you saw the future of how these conflicts end.
[Brandon laughs]
Brandon: Well I got a 9.
Amanda: You can add +4 to your roll if you want, I can use my reaction!
Brandon: Yeah let's do it!
Eric: Nice so Agent Smith, how do you help FutureProof steel himself against the electricity?
Amanda: I think I'm going to attempt to lasso the electricity using the power cord that Micks Foreperson gave me.
Julia (as Moxie): You know, lassoing electricity a thing that we've all done from time to time.
Brandon (as FutureProof): That's actually one thing I haven't done.
Julia (as Moxie): Oh see there we go we found something FutureProof hasn't done!
Amanda (as Agent Smith): They tell you at the academy to expect the unexpected ,and this is really what they mean.
Eric: wonderful ok so now we are on Julia!
Julia: I'm going to attack because that is what I’m good at. Okay so that is a 28.
Eric: Yeah that hits.
Julia: And a 29.
Eric: Yeah, those hit.
Julia: So let's roll those damage,
[Dice rolls]
Julia: 16 for the first one, and 19 on the second one.
Eric: Yeah make another constitution saving throw for me bud.
[Dice rolls]
Julia: Yeah it's a 19 +6.
Eric: Yeah again the electricity surges through your sword, and the Norse spirit inside you says “no no no electricity”
Julia (as Moxie): Thank you Glod!
Eric: Amanda it is now your turn.
Amanda: May I do a perception check to see if there's any kind of shutoff switch, or emergency red button to shut this generator down please?
Eric: Please do.
[Dice rolling]
Amanda: 16 +5, 21.
Eric: Alright with the 21, you can ask two of your questions.
Amanda: What here can I use to shut this golem down for good? and how can we get this done safely?
Eric: I think of the combination of those two is that the AC unit that you see in front of you seems to be a very high-powered AC unit, because the dial goes all the way up to iceage. So if you could find a way to power it because it's not powered yet you could probably freeze it, and it stay in place.
Julia (as Moxie): Your excellent lasso may actually be somewhat useful here!
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Indeed! I'm going to pull the beetle off my lapel sort of like shake it out like I'm shaking out a sheet or a shirt that's wrinkled, and it pops up into a like 16 inch long like giant sort of round Terrier shaped beetle.
[Eric makes excited pigeon noises]
Amanda: I think I dropped the lasso once I had successfully lassoed the bolt, so I'm going to point to it and then point to the AC unit. and instruct it to fly it forward.
Julia: Plug it in!
Eric: Wonderful I think that it goes and it picks up in fix of the surge protector and plugs it in the AC unit, and the AC unit whirrs to life.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Man that feels nice.
Amanda: Is it turned to ice age?
Eric: Well right now, it's on the lowest which is cool breeze.
Julia (as Moxie): This reminds me of my time in the tropics,
[Brandon laughs]
Julia (as Moxie): You know I invented the banana daiquiri?
[Eric and Brandon laughing]
Amanda (as Agent Smith): This is such a weird job.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I love a good banana daiquiri, they're really good they're really tasty.
Amanda: For my action can I have the sidekick focus the fans of the AC really precisely at the golem to kind of minimize like where else in the room this icy blast will be going, and then if they can do that I want to turn the dial to ice.
Eric: Okay I will make a dexterity roll on behalf of your sidekick who can do that however, it has a 0 in all the things that it does.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: So I would say that you can do this but you need to turn it on. Like you can't like go look to make sure it's aimed before you turn it onto Ice Age.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Guys, I'm going to try the icing unit. Can you get out of the way?
Julia (as Moxie): Absolutely, I will attack from a distance I suppose! It's not usually my forte but we’ll try it.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Consider me gone!
Amanda: Incredible so I'm gonna skirt the room and go myself to the AC unit so I can use my own dex to focus the the blast and turn on.
Eric: Okay wonderful, so if you want to try to ice it now I would say that the only person who is in the way is Moxie.
Julia: I have very high constitution darling just try it.
Amanda: No, yeah, yeah, yeah I'm gonna do it.
Eric: So yeah you turn it on to ice age, and I'm gonna first I want to see how the attack goes. So Agent Smith make a dexterity roll for me.
[Dice rolls]
Amanda: So I got a 9 +3, and I am going to use my reaction so that's a 16.
Eric: Okay as much as I would love to be able to say that you try to focus it around Moxie—
Amanda: That’s secondary, I want to turn it on most of all.
Eric: Yeah you definitely hit, you turn it on. So we're gonna make dexterity saves for the electric golem, and for Moxie.
Julia: I did roll with disadvantage, and I did roll a 15.
Eric: Ayy!
Brandon: Would it be a good idea for me to use my power to give her one d6 at this point?
Eric: Yeah this is she failed, so you give her the 1 d6 because this is a physical.
Brandon: I'm gonna use my help yourself out feature, because I call it the beginning of the game that Moxie was going to fail some sort of physical challenge or attack, I'm going to let her roll in extra 1 d6, and add that to her to her save!
Eric: Alright Julia, I will tell you the dc that I set for this is because this thing has an ice age setting it is dc 20 so you need a roll of 5 or 6 on on your d6 to get out of the way.
Brandon: In story FutureProof says
Brandon (as FutureProof): You're gonna— you're gonna need to do a somersault instead of a flip here.
[Amanda laughing]
Julia (as Moxie): Thank you?
Brandon (as FutureProof): Just trust me.
Julia: It’s a 5…
[Everyone cheering]
Eric: Amazing alright, because you got out of the way the amount of damage was 66. So Julia you take 33 points of damage, but I'm going to halve that as well because you have a fire sword.
Julia: Hell yeah!
Amanda: Nice!
Eric: I was only going to give you that if you passed, by the way so you only take 33, you only take 16. The monster is going to take 66, and you no longer have to do hold person it is now frozen in place.
Brandon: Oh delightful!
Amanda: Agent Smith looks extremely smug.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Pretty good but I am the de facto office manager too, lot of experience with these ACs.
Julia (as Moxie): Quick shooting Tex!
Eric: So now you've gone all the way through initiative, this thing is still alive but it's frozen in a way that like cartoonishly cavemen are frozen in blocks of ice. So it's still alive but it is encased in ice so it's not going to run away for now, so you can choose to try to kill it, or you can do something else like you can decide to come out of initiative.
Amanda: We can call SLaM retrieval.
Julia: We could!
Julia (as Moxie): Who would like to take bets beforehand if I can shatter this thing?
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Agent Smith): I'd rather not have tom this is what SLaM retrieval is for.
Julia (as Moxie): Hmmm, well that's no fun!
Amanda (as Agent Smith): That's what they call me.
Amanda: And I use my wrist-watch to radio in SLaM retrieval.
Eric: I love that, and then you quickly hear just like the sound of helicopters as nondescript people come in, just load the iceberg up onto a dolly, and then fly it in packet of like this air carrier style helicopter, and they give Agent Smith a quick salute, and hop back on the the helicopter.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Well that was a quick response time.
Eric: You also get a note on your communicator that says paper work deadlines file in five hours.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Oh great.
Julia (as Moxie): So gang, what are the chances that that was actually the devil? Because I don't think that seemed like a robot devil it just seemed like kind of a a large monster, like if I was devising the ad campaign for the movie version of this scenario here, that would have been like a minion, and we have a much larger villain to face later on but what do I know?
Amanda (as Agent Smith): They teach you in Ethics of Crime Stopping 101 that you can't just inscribe intent to a creature that you have not communicated with or being able to understand so perhaps it is possible that it was just reacting to what has to happen.
Brandon (as FutureProof): Yeah I mean like time means nothing what's intend, motivation doesn't matter.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): They should really name the sushi special What is Time, you say it so frequently.
Julia (as Moxie): We should get him a t-shirt made up for the holidays.
Amanda (as Agent Smith): Hmmm, i like that.
Julia (as Moxie): “What is time” black font!
[Calming music starts]
Eric: Alright so yeah, you're pretty much finished for now so you can head back to the office in the black Camaro.
Julia: Excellent, yeah!
Amanda: Alright take some photos to document the scene for my paperwork, you know.
Eric: Smart I think that you three go back and the sushi place is open again, but they've refused to let in FutureProof because you've eaten too much sushi today, there's a cap. There's a hard cap on sushi.
Brandon: Eric I'm gonna expend my 2 portent rolls to gain narrative control.
[Julia starts laughing]
Eric: Yeah what would you like to happen?
Brandon: I want the sushi place to let FutureProof in, so he can have his sushi.
Eric: So what does it look like when you use this, when you're controlling the narrative? You like write it in your book?
Brandon: Yeah I write it in my book, and like it's like reality sort of like it's almost like a parallax effect like it's sort of like shifts for a second and then it results back to normal.
Eric: I love the idea that there now there are like two multiverses, one where Arnold didn't get sushi and one where Arnold did.
Julia: We’re in the better timeline.
Eric: There's there's a thank you prepared for all of you. You now have to-go bags of sushi because they had to use it because it was gonna go bad cause the refrigerator went out. So they just give you tons of sushi.
Amanda: A dumbwaiter would be a security risk, but it's almost worth it.
Eric: You walk up the stairs and you open the door I think if this is a comic the final page is this full page setup of Charles is tied up—
[Suspenseful electronic music slowly fades in]
Eric: In electromagnetic chains, and a gag in his mouth as a devilish winged horned robotic monster stands with his foot on Charles's shoulder, like a victorious pirate he says
Eric (as monster): Oh you brought leftovers for me!? The Robot Devil!?
Eric: TO BE CONTINUED!
Amanda: Issue seven!
Eric: Issue 7! The Robot Devil wants his lunch!
[Amanda laughing]
Julia: I'm not gonna say Moxie didn't tell you all, but Moxie told you all.
Brandon (as FutureProof): I didn’t see this one coming.
Eric: And here is the mini of the Robot Devil.
Brandon: Oh my god that's incredible.
Amanda: That truly is a robot devil with very grunge pants!
Brandon: Yeah it's like a punk grunge Robot Devil, I love it!
Julia: So we're gonna do another session where we get to fight the Robot Devil right?
Eric: We'll see in the next issue of SLaM Comics!
[Theme music starts]
Eric: Ahh thank you everybody so much for listening to this! Again you can find all these subclasses, and more subclasses, and items, and an entire breakdown of how to turn Dungeon and Dragons fantasy tropes of classes, and in general into a superhero story with the guide No Capes from Join the Party written by me! Everyone please go check it out.
Amanda: Join the party pod dot com slash merch!
Eric: And thank you to Hero Forge for helping me make all this stuff! Their stuff is in color now and it is amazing! I'm not very good at painting, but you know who is? The computers that make this stuff! It was so, so, so much fun to make these minis! You can find these minis on our social just check it out! Thank you so much Hero Forge! And as they say in my hometown, Lagoon Burrough Berg, SLAM! GET AT IT!
[Everyone laughing]
[Theme music kicks up]