Camp Diogenes Staff Handbook, Rule #91: If you have a medical emergency, contact and report to the nurses’ office. You may be saying, “What do you mean? There hasn’t been a nurse here for forty years!” And I am saying, that’s preposterous, it’s right over there. Why are you wiggling your fingers like that and moaning “OooOoOOOoOOOOOOooOo?” Jeremy, go to the nurse and get an ACE bandage.
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Cast & Crew
- Co-Host, Co-Producer, GM: Eric Silver
- Co-Host (Les Proenneke), Co-Producer, Sound Designer, Composer: Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host (Carrie-Ann Price), Co-Producer: Amanda McLoughlin
- Co-Host (Phoebe Cooper), Co-Producer: Julia Schifini
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is an actual play podcast with tangible worlds, genre-pushing storytelling, and collaborators who make each other laugh each week. We welcome everyone to the table, from longtime players to folks who’ve never touched a roleplaying game before. Hop into the Camp-Paign, our Monster of the Week story set in a weird and wild summer camp, or marathon our D&D games with Campaign 2 for a modern, sci-fi superhero game and Campaign 1 for a high fantasy story. And once a month we release the Afterparty, where we answer your questions about the show and how we play the game. New episodes every Tuesday.
Transcript
Eric: I have a secret I want to tell all of you at the end but remind me at the end of the next session.
Everyone: Ooooh!
Julia: Okay.
Amanda: Eric, why would you say that?!
Eric: You know, for fun.
Julia: Uhhhhhhhh...
Amanda: Oh no.
Brandon: Consider my interest piqued, sir.
Eric: I will consider it and I will return it to you.
[laughter]
Amanda: Last time on Join the Party.
Eric: Assistant Director Z asks the best friends to look into why a bunch of beds are missing from the new girls' cabin. Underneath this massive cabin is an entire gymnasium complex where house demon and all-around weirdo, Frederick the Frog hangs out. Frederick declares Phoebe to be the Chosen One and challenges Phoebe and her friends to defeat a gelatinous cube which has been destroying the beds and attacking campers. Les books it out of there as Phoebe and Carrie-Ann keep the ooze from getting into the camp's water supply. Phoebe tries to destroy the ooze with magic, but it only divides the ooze into multiple smaller oozes, which disappoints Frederick the Frog and exposes Carrie-Ann and herself to bad, bad, bad acid burns. Les sprints to Assistant Director Z, who speeds both of them on a golf cart back to the cabin to save the two badly burned and now passed out CITs and carries them both over his big brawny shoulder to the nurses' office. Who was the dashing gelatinous ooze? And do I know him from somewhere? Nevermind, we got more mystery to solve. Let's get this party started.
[theme]
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Good morning, campers. This is John Bonez Bones with your morning announcements! Pew! Pew! Pew! Pew! The breakfast today is the regular thing whatever comes out of the waffle maker from Springer, and everyone go over to the nurses' office and say hi to Phoebe and Carrie-Ann who's recovering from falling down the girls' hill and not knowing where they were going.
Brandon: I think that's against HIPAA. I think Bonez Bones needs to read up on HIPAA.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Though there are no hippopotamuses in the waterhole, we've already debunked that. If anyone wants to sign the big card just find CIT Jennii who is walking around the Cafetorium.
Julia (as Phoebe): [in a sickly voice] I don’t want a big card.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Alright, have a Camp Diogenes day. Do what you say, say what you do. Summertime fun.
Julia: He's really being quite liberal with the camp slogan, huh?
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Oh, yeah!
Julia: Oh, Macho Man.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] I'm also, here’s my impression of Macho Man Randy Savage.
Julia: Checks out, makes sense.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Oh, yeah!
Brandon: I love that Bonez Bones just uses the morning announcements to work on this impression work. It's beautiful.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Alright. Here's my Christopher Walken.
Julia: Go on.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] I forgot what. Hold on, I forgot what Christopher Walken does, fuck. Hey, hey, here. No, just kidding. I've been working. I've been working on my Jeff Goldblum. I'm going to do that right now. Hold on.
Julia: Okay.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system as Jeff Goldblum] Life, you know, finds a way.
Eric: Listen, when I do an impression of an impression. I'm gonna give me one that I know,-
Julia: There you go.
Eric: -at least.
Brandon: Is there a suggestion box somewhere that other campers can give to.
Amanda: I was just going to ask that.
Julia: I want feedback, I wanna give him feedback.
Amanda: I think in the Cafetorium as you leave when you like deposit your trays and like bus your dishes and stuff. There is a little box nailed to the wall of a Bones' mail. And that's where you can drop index cards or napkins or you know, whatever you want to write on.
Julia: Gotcha. Makes sense.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Alright it’s the time of the morning and where I read the Bonez mail! Rattle bones, Rattle bones. Rattle bones. Rattle.
Julia: Got him a soundboard?
Brandon: I do respect a DJ who does his own foley, that's pretty impressive.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Does he have a jar of bones like in my head, it's like he has bird bones in like a little, like a little mason jar.
Amanda: I think that's chicken wings from the chicken wing waffles and it would smell really bad if you unsealed it but no one's ever unsealed it.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Alright, and this is from Cabin 2 to Booger. Happy birthday, Booger!
Eric (as Booger): Hey guys, it's not my birthday. Why’d you tell people it’s my birthday? No, now everyone’s gonna say it’s my birthday.
Amanda: Wholesome.
Eric: Sorry, should I keep doing this bit?
[everyone assenting]
Julia: This can be the whole episode, we don't care.
Brandon: Yep.
Eric: Alright, we're gonna play a one-pager based off of John Bonez Bones', the PA announcer guy.
Brandon: Oh Eric, I just looked in the box of suggestions and there are four of them. So he’ll need to read all of them.
Eric: Okay, well, I did. I did just do one. Brandon would you, can you give me any information about who they are and who wrote them or no?
Brandon: I'm sorry. I can't see them. I'm not here in this scene. So-
Eric: Oh, right. Brandon's out of the scene, right?
Julia: Oh, I– you know what I actually I pulled one out myself.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia: And I see one is from Nurse Jackson.
Eric: Okay.
Julia: And she wrote, "Please stop revealing the medical issues of fellow campers sincerely, Nurse Jackson."
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Alright, I got– I got a Bonez mail from Nurse Jackson. Nurse Jackson says [reading quietly], "You're doing a great job. Keep doing it. Go say hi to Carrie-Ann and Phoebe who is in the nurses' office" This one is from Les, CIT Les, it says, “I have a dumb poop face.”
Julia: Oh!
Eric: And then you see across like Dougie Juice is doing sit-ups on the field. And he's like, Dougie is like-
Eric (as Dougie): Nice!
Amanda: Damn.
Eric (as Dougie): He read my note.
Brandon: I picked one up and there's one that's just a really crude sexual pun on his name, I think is one of them.
Eric: Okay.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] I'm not gonna read this one. People hate Bonez with a Z and Bones. I will not read anything if you say Boner. I just won't, that's the policy. And finally, this is from the Art Barn. And it says, "Stop staying here overnight. When we lock the doors if you're on the second floor, we're just gonna lock you in. And then we can't get you out because we immediately go to sleep because we're very tired." And that is from The Art People in the Art Barn.
Julia: Make sense.
Brandon: Oh, I just picked this one up too. It says, "Hey, it's Eric. This is the midroll."
[everyone snickering]
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Do you also like Dunkin Donuts coffee? I love it!
Amanda: What a tonal jarring that would be.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Use promo code Join the Party to get 10% off whenever you go to 20 Sided Store in Brooklyn New York.
Brandon: Yes!
Amanda: Go to any Dunkin Donuts and say my promo code is Join the Party. I dare you. I fucking dare you.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] Go to a Dunkin Donut, say join- I'm using the code Join the Party for 10% off a brown sugar cold foam cold brew.
Julia: And when the person behind the counter says, "What are you talking about?” Don't leave until you get that cold brew.
Brandon: Yep. Just stare at them.
Eric (as Bones): [over the PA system] And say it's a TikTok prank and send us the video.
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: No, please don't do that.
Amanda: No, no.
Eric: Don't do that. Don't do that.
Brandon: That's what I say though to people when I embarrass myself, I just say oh, that's TikTok prank and then I leave.
Amanda: When was the last time that happened?
Brandon: Amanda, constantly.
Julia: You don't know Brandon's life. You don't know what Seattle's like.
Eric: That's true. Brandon, Brandon is just out there doing TikTok pranks.
Brandon: My pants just fall down all the time. You know.
Julia: That's how you survive out there in the Pacific Northwest.
Brandon: I don't know what else embarrassing happens to people.
Amanda: Getting pooped on by a bird
Eric: Brandon slips on a banana peel. He reveals someone's infidelities when he shouldn't be revealing their infidelities.
Amanda: Yeah, that's true.
Brandon: Oh, I wasn't supposed to tell you that Dashboard Confessional came out with a new single called Infidelities.
Eric: Nice.
Brandon: Nailed it.
Eric: Nice, there you go.
Brandon: Eric, how was the TikTok prank I just did?
Eric: It's a great TikTok prank, you nailed it.
Amanda: Well, guys, I can tell you that having her name mentioned not once but twice on the announcements and knowing there's a big card coming her way even if she has shared custody with her fellow best friend Phoebe makes this the best day of Carrie-Ann's life.
Julia: Meanwhile, Phoebe's like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Please don't say my name anymore. Oh god, there's gonna be a card. No.
Eric (as Phoebe): What if they spell my name with an F somewhere, that doesn't make any sense. When they spell it Phobie. Footbie?
Julia (as Phoebe): No one ever spells it right on the first try even though it's a very common name.
Eric (as Phoebe): Then they're gonna call me Footbie for the rest of the summer.
Amanda (as Phoebe): Phebis. Which sounds too much like Pepis which is what the younger kids call a penis.
Julia (as Phoebe): No... Stop Carrie-Ann, no!
Eric: Carrie-Ann, that's a great impression of Phoebe.
Amanda: Thank you!
Eric: True.
Brandon: Hey, guys, I'm having a good time. We don't need to play the game.
Eric: Yeah, no, this is good. Here's the thing about staying in the nurses' cabin.
Amanda: Best way to pass the time in camp?
Eric: 100%. There are at least 10 kids who all have anxiety who are saying that they have stomach aches and are, quote waiting for their medicine who are just hanging out in the nurses' cabin.
Julia: Oh, that's kind of rude to talk about Phoebe when she has an actual medical condition right now.
Eric: Phoebe sees like 11 kids sitting there looking at their shoes. And Phoebe's like, yeah, nice.
Julia (as Phoebe): I remember when I did that.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): I remember being a Cardinal and being like, "Oh, bad feelings all around. It must be a stomach ache."
Eric: Because the thing about the nurses' cabin is that it's actually a remodeled version of a very nice cabin that was built here in the early 1920s. You know, this is one of the various authors who are part of the lost generation who just like new F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway and like, saw them naked wrestle and then wanted to get out of that life before World War Two. So they just kind of escaped to wherever Camp Diogenes is. And they built a very large Lincoln Log-esque cabin. And while it was there, and the various things that happened around the area in Camp Diogenes, that author is no longer there. But the cabin is and it's actually quite large, which is very helpful because there are a lot of different rooms inside the now the nurses' cabin, where they can put the various people who have regular stomach aches, like there's a very large porch, a reach around porch that kind of like a barrel there was supposed to be a manmade lake that was going to be dug in the middle of the woods, which never came about, but there is like a very large porch that was supposed to look out on the man-made lake. And that's where Nurse Jackson gives out all the pills to the kids they need. So they stand out on the porch and they wait for their prescriptions and all this stuff.
Brandon: They convalesce in the beautiful cool summer air.
Eric: Yeah, and then, of course, there are different rooms within and there's like a bunch of beds inside so that the kids that are sick, the kids who are hurt, the kids who are waiting to go to the hospital. They have kind of different triage rooms from them to hang out in which is supervised by Nurse Whippet. No one ever sees Nurse Whippet but Nurse Whippet is incredibly good at their job and so like you know there's the idea that like Nurse Jackson who's there and giving out pills, everyone sees Nurse Jackson all the time and you can leave notes for Nurse Whippet. Nurse Whippet usually shows up when you're sleeping and has like, when you wake up there's a little paper cup of Advil and a tall glass of very crisp cold water when you wake up and like a little note telling you what's actually wrong with you and tell you to stop belly aching because we need rooms for kids who are actually sick. Regardless of how sick you are, Nurse Whippet will tell you that you need to stop bellyaching and get up.
Amanda: I saved my note from Nurse Whippet back when I was a Cardinal that said Advil won’t fix your anxiety, please come see me. It was the start of an improvement for me.
Brandon: Do we think she's a ghost? Do we think she’s some kind of like angel or something?
Amanda: Yeah, they seem like some kind of like spirit or angel or like dryad, maybe? Who can only move around at night but can sort of intuit with a healing power.
Julia: Suspicious.
Amanda: Can I tell you my headcanon for this infirmary?
Eric: Sure.
Amanda: I think that because Camp Die was created in the 1880s when people thought that there were two genders, that was the same as sex. I think that non-binary campers who don't want to live in either boys’ or girls' cabins depending on their gender identity and are like nah, other slash third for me. I think they get fucking air-conditioned private rooms above the infirmary. And it’s like the sweetest gig in all of camp, you got cold water at all times. Maybe you can, you know, search out an internet signal if you get high up enough. But that is where their quarters are. And it is good to be outside the gender binary at Camp Die.
Brandon: That's good shit.
Julia: That's true.
Eric: I cannot confirm that headcanon. But I can say that because this was built in the 1920s, there was like a rudimentary version of air conditioning, which involves very large blocks of ice and having someone ferry very large blocks of ice from the nearest town. But of course, there was mildew that was only discovered in 1974.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Eric: So they had to just fully replace it with actual air conditioning.
Amanda: Yay!
Eric: So the nurses' cabin is one of the only places in Camp Diogenes that has air conditioning. That is true.
Amanda: Fabulous.
Eric: So the other things you said are also probably true. Also probably true.
Amanda: I like it.
Eric: So anyway, that is because in one of the rooms we have Phoebe and Carrie-Ann who are convalescing from their acid burns over a majority of their body, which made them pass out. Let's just touch on this very quickly. The way that Monster of the Week Harm goes is that once you have four or more harm you have-- you're unstable, which means that you need medical attention or a veterinarian because that's the kind of game we're playing to like stitch you up and fix you or it's just gonna get worse, right?
Amanda: So normally your injuries get better over time, right? But when you're unstable, they get worse over time instead?
Eric: Yes, if you're unstable and it's not treated, it gets worse over time. But you can kind of sleep off Harm, much like in Dungeons and Dragons. However, we're going to homebrew this a little bit about how long it takes harm to go away because-
Julia: We've only got the summer man.
Eric: Yeah, just the summertime. You know, when you're watching a TV show, and you have no real idea how long it's been in between episodes, even if they're sequential.
Julia: And neither do the writers.
Eric: You know, they know.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. It's like the actor clearly got a haircut in between the episodes, and then they change the airing order. And so it looks as if their hair like a doll was like grown in and then grown out again overnight. Like that.
Julia: Classic.
Eric: Exactly.
Amanda: Yeah, I'm just remembering some of the scary dolls my mom had from her childhood in the 60s with like, ponytails that can like go in and out of the head.
Brandon: Ah!
Amanda: Scary. Yeah, no, it wasn't good.
Eric: Leaving that terrible image aside.
Amanda: Camp Die, baby!
Eric: So if you’re not unstable, you can kind of just sleep off your harm, which is what we've been doing. If you are unstable, you have to go to the nurses' office or a hospital or you need to get taken care of. And then like, the way that it is in the book is that each in-game day takes away a block of harm, right? But of course, like we don't know that necessarily. So like in this kind of an amorphous thing, if you go to the nurses' office and you try to deal with it, and then the next mystery unless you do something specific to get even more medical care or healing or whatever it is in this weird game that we have, then you go back to 0. However, if you just get regular care, your next harm will start at 1 for the next mystery. Or if you're like intentionally running out before your care is good, we're gonna have some sort of negotiation about what it means, how much harm you have for the next mystery.
Julia: Gotcha.
Amanda: Totally.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: I like that. I mean, it gives us some stakes like summer is only so long like Julia was saying, and also fucking Steven is out there doing whatever the fuck Steven's doing sorry, I need Join the Party listeners named Steven. But you know what I mean.
Julia: Fucking Stevens.
Amanda: And every day that I, Carrie-Ann, lay in this Infirmary is another day that forces outside my control are endangering the one thing I care about in this world. Camp!
Julia: Meanwhile Phoebe's like-
Julia (as Phoebe): God, I just want a break. There's so much happening in my life.
Brandon: And we smash cut to Steven ballroom dancing with a watermelon to a Victrola.
Julia: Cool, makes sense.
Amanda: The thing is Brandon, that could totally fucking happen, and it’s really scary.
Julia: And Carrie-Ann just doesn't know if that's happening.
Eric: Yeah, who can say? And Les is like, I don't know, stretching his hamstring somewhere, right?
Brandon: I was gonna ask, I have one check. So should I just take that off?
Eric: Just take that off. You're fine.
Brandon: Wonderful.
Eric: Yeah. So while we're in there, let's figure this out in terms of the harm of Phoebe and Carrie-Ann.
Amanda: Sorry, Eric, it's really important for you to know, are all of the Flycatchers watching Les stretch?
Brandon: Les wouldn't do that. Les would not do that.
Eric: Les stretches inside of a cabin only.
Amanda: With the curtains closed, yeah.
Eric: Dougie throws a pillow at you and says-
Eric (as Dougie): Stop stretching. I'm trying to sleep!
Eric: And Conway goes- [horse noise] again. So let's talk about the harm here. I think that you have like a whole bunch of calamine lotion or Neosporin just all over the majority of your bodies, Phoebe and Carrie-Ann. I think this is definitely the part like hospital cartoons where like you have one leg in traction. And the other one you're just covered wrapped up in bandages.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: And you just have like, lotion all over your face. And like you have shorts and a tank top on. So we see how much harm there is all over your-- over both your bodies. So I think you're not unstable anymore. But you will need to stay in the nurses' office for a little while to kind of repair unless you want to do something else.
Amanda: Yeah, I think as we convalesce, Carrie-Ann is like muttering under her breath or like plotting out kind of all of the things she wants to check up on and all the failings of the full-time staff that she's identifying now that she is no longer a camper and now one of them. But she's doing that while standing over Phoebe's bed, holding a book kind of above Phoebe's face, like when you're at the dentist and they have a TV on the ceiling. And just waiting until Phoebe says flip and then flipping the book for her.
Julia: And Phoebe is like is one, exactly what I was going to be doing. Phoebe's face is buried in a book this entire time. And like probably halfway through a chapter Phoebe's like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Carrie-Ann? Carrie-Ann?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Oh. Yeah, yeah, what's up?
Julia (as Phoebe): This is a really good part of the book and your muttering is very distracting. Are you okay?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Sorry, sorry. I thought that wasn't inside. It is outside and I thought it was inside.
Julia (as Phoebe): It is super outside right now. It's quietly outside but it is outside.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Okay. Yeah. No, thank you. Thank you best friend. I will make that change.
Julia (as Phoebe): Are you good?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Um, I have some things I want to do. And 70% of my skin itches. And-
Julia (as Phoebe): Oh yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I can't like jump in the– in the swimming hole to kind of shock my body into feeling a sensation that isn’t itch but is instead pain, which is normally what I do. So-
Julia (as Phoebe): Oh!
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I'm just, you know, I'm just uh-
Eric: Oh, damn.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): -holding it all, all in there. And I am. I'm going to figure out what's happening here. I, either they did a really good job of hiding all this stuff from us when we were campers or things are worse than they were. And if I'm going to protect my legacy and my birthright I'm going to have to gonna have to do something.
Brandon: Carrie-Ann gets scarier by the day.
Julia: Yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay. Um….So like, I'm kind of enjoying this, like, my skin is also extremely itchy and I don't really want to shock it into pain right now.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You should, but okay.
Julia (as Phoebe): You? Okay. You, you want to-- like I trust nurse with it and they're like hidden powers and identity like very strongly but you, you want to do you want to leave early?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Um, I want to I want to make sure I'm okay to serve camp. That's my first priority. So I think I'll stay, you know, another- at least till the bandages are off. But before I go, listen, I don't want to- I don't want to make you unsafe. So I'll just say that I have an errand that I'm gonna do before we leave and just leave it at that.
Julia: I think Phoebe just like looks down from the book which is saying something for Phoebe. And is like-
Julia (as Phoebe): So you remember when Boo got hurt at the swimming hole?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, yeah worst day in my life. Disappointed the director. Yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): And I made it better, remember?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): Maybe because I- I don't want you to like go off and make yourself hurt even more by doing errands because you, you can't relax a little bit.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): No, there's no time to relax, there’s camp to run.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I relax in the winter and then not really because I'm preparing for camp.
Julia (as Phoebe): Would you like me to maybe try that on you?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I mean, yeah, would it, would it like hurt you or set you back at all?
Julia (as Phoebe): Uhhh... I don't really know. Cuz I've done it one time and someone's cut turned into moss but I mean we could give it a go, right?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, no, I'm-
Julia (as Phoebe): I know that lying frog said that I was the Chosen One and then told me that he was lying the entire time but I do like genuinely feel like maybe I, I have a purpose.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Hell yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): And maybe, maybe my purpose is helping you achieve your purpose?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Damn, Phoebe. That's amazing. I have also felt that I have a purpose. And I've also felt that your purpose is to help me achieve my purpose.
[Brandon and Eric laughing heartily]
Brandon: Man, Carrie-Ann is really turning into authoritarian camp leader.
Julia: Whoa!
Eric: Turning into, Brandon? Where have you been for the last few episodes?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): And I gotta tell you, I think Les' purpose is to help you achieve your purpose of helping me achieve mine.
Julia (as Phoebe): It's like a domino effect.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah. That's why we're best friends.
Eric: I want to make this meme right after this which is small domino Carrie-Ann at camp. Big domino Les achieves his purpose by helping Phoebe achieve her purpose to help Carrie-Ann achieve her purpose.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): But listen, no best friend would let her best friend get hurt. So if this could be bad, don't worry about it. But if this works, then yeah, let's do it and I'll pretend I want to leave tomorrow morning. But overnight in my last night, I'll run an errand.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay. I'm gonna try to talk to the moose real quick and make sure that like that's cool with him.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Okay, I love that we're getting into code words. Okay, I'm going to change my errand into I am going to, I'm going to harvest an apple. Wink.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay, I, you know what, that's fine.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): We don't talk about it. Alright.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): No, it's great. I don't I don't think it's it's talking to the moose. But like I, you know, I'll work on it. I'll work on it. Love you, best friend. And then I like dropped the book on Phoebe's chest.
Julia (as Phoebe): Egh! Ow.
Julia: Phoebe's gonna like quietly mutter to herself being like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Uhhh... Big moose god, are you like around? I don't know how to call you. I don't think you have like a phone number.
Eric: Good question. Let's make a magic roll, yeah?
Julia: Cool, yeah. Yeah.
Brandon: I mean, to be fair, Phoebe hasn't even tried a phone number. So-
Eric: Yeah, it's 1-800-MOOSE-7.
Julia: I rolled 8 + 2 for a 10.
Eric: Okay, so we're a 10.
Julia: Phoebe just mutters to herself-
Julia (as Phoebe): [singing] 8 6 7 5 3 0 9…
Brandon: [singing] 8 6 7 cars kids for cars
Eric: [singing] 1-877 magic for kids. K-A, yeah.
[midroll]
Eric: Hey, it's Eric, I'm recording this at the end of August. And this is one of the two times of the year where New York City is incredibly empty. I don't know if this happens in other metro areas, or maybe you feel this all over the country. But like, everyone just disappears and goes on vacation at the end of August. And I really like the city with less people in it. Not like I want there to be less people because living in the city and being in an urban environment. And having randos around all the time is the best part of being here that like we're all in it together. But like the folks who are going out to their summer homes anyway, for like a month are the people that want to get out of the city and like are the ones holding up subways, and like demanding things from clerks. So I'm really liking New York City in August. Even though the only two things I'm doing are sweating and looking for heirloom tomatoes. I'm starting to embrace it a little bit. But please bring on the Fall. There's you can get pumpkin sauce at Dunkin Donuts now, please give me the Fall. Welcome to the mid-roll, I needed to get below 70 degrees Fahrenheit, please. As I said, I'm recording this mid-roll. I have time because at the end of August, everyone and their therapists are on vacation. So everyone, please continue to become new patrons. And I will be reading your name in the coming weeks. We are so so excited about the benefits that we have on the Patreon I want to plug one in particular that I think y'all will love there are ad-free episodes at $8 a month, which I think is a steal. I know y'all love the mid-roll and I love doing the mid-roll. But like I think it's a very fair exchange for the price of like two iced coffees a month for you to get uninterrupted Join the Party. Like just straight through injected right into your veins. I think that's a very good deal. Check that out with all the other things we offer on Patreon at patreon.com/jointhepartypod. Did you know that Join the Party is part of the Multitude Podcast Collective. I think you'd like one of Multitude’s other shows, Next Stop. Next Stop is an audio sitcom. The show explores the turbulent time in your mid to late 20s. When everyone is changing around you and you worry you might not catch up. Across the 10 episodes of the first season, Next Stop follows three roommates' trials through work, relationships, friendships, and more. We watch them grow together as a unit, no matter what life throws at them. For anyone who grew up watching classic sitcoms, like Friends or Seinfeld, or Just Shoot Me or Spin City I'm gonna keep digging I'm gonna go right to the bottom of the barrel or Girlfriends for that matter. That's not the bottom of the barrel that's that's High Tea or Martin. There is nothing more comforting in times of stretch and upheaval. And yes, next up is a solidly 21st-century sitcom that gives audience something to laugh out without punching down. Written in created by let me let me look at my notes. Oh, Eric Silver. I know that guy Directed and Edited by Brandon Grugle executive produced by Amanda McLoughlin and cast and assistant directed by Julia Schifini. It's the Join the Party folks man, you're gonna love it. Season 1 is out now. Listen to all 10 episodes by searching for Next Stop and your podcast app or go to nextstopshow.com. We are sponsored this week by Inked Gaming. Looking for a top-notch one-stop shop that supplies you with all the premium gaming gear you need? Well, our sponsor Inked Gaming is one of the best in the biz for supplying you as a top-notch one shop stop for supplying you with all the premium gaming gear you require with a full selection. Okay, they did right but I found that with a full selection of play mats, mouse pads and more Inked Gaming gives you a wide selection of high-quality gear that can be customized and personalized just for you. So if you have a favorite art or design or pattern or personal logo that you want to make sure folks on stream or your friends see every time that you come on a video camera, you got to check out Inked Gaming. They also have a growing community of gifted indie artists who provide pre-designed art for their products. And in Inked Gaming is sure to give a commission of every single item sold to those artists who made those beautiful items. They've been in business for 11 years, and hopefully, they'll continue for another 111 years. Another wonderful perk of going to Inked Gaming is that we can give you a special secret for prize. Just go to inkedgaming.com/jointheparty and if you see something you like use the promo code: JOINTHEPARTY at checkout to get 10% off your order. That's a steal, go to inkedgaming.com/jointheparty and use code, JOINTHEPARTY to get 10% off your order.
[theme]
Eric: We're also sponsored today by Backblaze. They offer unlimited computer backup for Macs and PCs, just $7 a month, you can backup documents, music, photos, videos, drawings, poems, you wrote that you ought to remember videos of you at your Bar Mitzvah, all of your data backed up securely to the cloud, which you can access from anywhere in the world using their iOS and Android apps. They have restored over 55 billion files for customers. That is 55,000,000,000. Was that? That was a billion, all those zeros files for customers, and if ever have a disaster and need to totally restore your hard drive, say the seas are rising and it gets into your hard drive which might happen. Anything could happen now, they will even mail you a flash key or hard drive restore right to your door, you can get a free fully featured no credit card required trial at backblaze.com/jtp. That's backblaze.com/jtp for a free, full-featured trial.
Eric: And now a word from our sponsor BetterHelp. Hey, this is Eric Silver from hit podcast, and Monster of the Week, good podcast Join the Party. I'm here to talk about move I'm shifting my chair around. It's really fucking hot. It's so hot. I know that for those of you in the global south that might not be or those of you who live actually no those of you who live in, in the UK it is super freaking hot. And you got to bring yourself into cool places you think no, I'm a human, I can resist these temperatures. All I have to do is like drink a Sunny D every other hour or so. No, you got to go inside and get air conditioning. And that's how you should be treating your brain, my friends. How we care for our minds affects how we experience life. Just like you think you can withstand all the heat without AC you as you go through the trials and tribulations of being alive as a human with social interaction. You gotta talk to a therapist and BetterHelp can help you with that. BetterHelp allows you to meet with a therapist via phone, video or live chat you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours and you can switch to a new one for free if you need to. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/jointheparty so you better do it. Because it's so cheap and easy. Okay, that's better H E L P.com/jointheparty. What are you gonna do? Are you're gonna go to into the woods and talk to a witch about making it less hot and she all she needs is like some of your bones and it's so hot you're willing to give her some bones even like your metatarsals? No! Just go to therapy. BetterHelp: Don't go to a witch. And now back to the show.
[Midroll music]
Eric (as Big Moose): If that is the name you've chosen for me then that is the name I’ll respond to. The Moose, I have many names and many times and many things called me for help or stuff, what, yeah what do you need Phoebe, what can I help you with, my child?
[theme]
Brandon (as Big Moose): That's what they called me when I got drafted into the NBA.
Julia (as Phoebe): Wait, sorry. Like so other people have- have names for you. I'm just saying Moose god because I don't really I didn't know your preferred title like, do you have a preferred title?
Eric (as Big Moose): Whatever name you have for me is the name I will respond to. A name is-
Julia (as Phoebe): Charles?
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Big Moose): A name is more about the person who's reaching out so if you would like to call me Charles I can't-- Charles, I’m Charles, yes.
Julia (as Phoebe): Alright Chuck, buddy. Okay.
[Everyone laughs]
Amanda: A moose named Chuck is really good
Julia: Evil moose god-- Evil moose god named Chuck. Excellent.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay, so I don't really know how this works. My parents raised me agnostic. So when I- when I do stuff is that is that you helping me do stuff is that me? You talk a lot about like the food chain and like showing people my powers but I don't really know if that's my power or if I'm like channeling your power through me?
Eric (as Chuck Moose): Oh my two-footed, two-thumbed child.
Julia (as Phoebe): I do have two thumbs.
Brandon: But not two feet?
Eric (as Chuck Moose): My two hooved, two thumbed the child
Julia: Adorable.
Amanda: Are nails little hooves? I think it's the same stuff.
Brandon: That’s true.
Amanda: We have 20 hooves, ever think about that?
Julia: Poor Eric, he's just trying to be a serious moose god and we keep fucking with him.
Amanda: Eric's really giving me the look of a teacher, like, you done?
Eric: I need to know if we're finished before I go on, before I move on.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): The power doesn't flow through me, it is all the power of nature and of the outside and of the way that we interact. It is the power of the food chain, of the pyramid, of the pyramid of animals, of the circle of life. So when you harness the ability of your own power by not giving it to you as anymore as a chicken gives you the meat of itself that gets consumed by a human, who then dies and goes into the ground and the worms eat the human and the bird chicken eats the worm and et cetera, and so forth. You are just a conduit of the power itself. And the creatures who live in this area surrounded by the name you have given, you and the other two hooved, to thumbed creatures have given it to be Camp Diogenes, have stronger connection to that than anyone out there- any other person that I have seen, I can only tell you as much as I know, as a creature of the Woods who exists within and on either side of the wall. However, what I do want you to know is to understand that you are a conduit of power. And it is your responsibility amongst the ten-toed, two-hooved creatures to demonstrate that you understand the power of the world and of nature and of the woods and that you can help and they should hear you as you use that power. And be in awe of it. Do you understand?
Julia (as Phoebe): Yes? So I should be like- I've read a lot of fiction books were like telling people that you have magic powers means that you get persecuted. You're saying, tell everyone you're cool and stronger than them and so they won't do anything to you?
Eric (as Chuck Moose): I mean, that's not exactly what I said but if that's what you got from it...
Julia (as Phoebe): I didn't want to repeat back what you said to me but I was like trying to understand like, I'm the top of the food chain but also it's circle of life.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): Absolutely. Phoebe. Here's the thing, Phoebe, life is not organized into shapes there are metaphors for how we understand it. There. Yeah. So there is a top there, there is a point in the circle of life which are people who commune with the power more so than others.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): And yes, you should demonstrate that and be as, is your will and the will of the way that the ladder in the and-
Julia (as Phoebe): I gotcha, Chuck, I gotcha.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): You got it. You understand? Yeah, yeah.
Julia (as Phoebe): Also, like this is a total aside. The frog did tell me I was the chosen one and then took it back. Am I the Chosen One? Because I can channel this better than anyone else can?
Eric (as Chuck Moose): You were talking to a frog?
Julia (as Phoebe): Yeah. He sucked. He was a big frog.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): A big frog-
Julia (as Phoebe): Big frog.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): -that spoke your language from its frog mouth?
Julia (as Phoebe): I assume that was a frog. I mean, like I assumed he was speaking English. But maybe I was speaking frog the whole time. Woah…
Eric (as Chuck Moose): I can, I'll do a check with all the animals out here but I don't know of any frog that speak English.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay. He sucked.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): Sounds like it.
Julia (as Phoebe): Yeah, it kept trying to tell me frog facts.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): Like, frogs are an essential brick of the road that leads between all living creatures?
Julia (as Phoebe): No, he was like, oh, did you know the poison dart frog can like kill a man with like only a little bit of its poison. Stuff like that.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): I did not know that.
Julia (as Phoebe): And then they have weird mouths, something about their mouths. I don't really remember.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): I will remember that going forward. Good to know.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay.
Eric: Remember, Brandon, when you looked at the frog, it was an unnatural creature.
Julia: I didn't know that. So-
Brandon: I can do nothing about that.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: You don't have to-- Les, what do you do? Let's get through the action now!
Brandon: I continue stretching my hamstrings while my one leg is on Dougie Juice's bunk.
Eric (as Dougie): No, fuck. Les, stop it.
Eric: With all the windows pulled.
Julia: I think Phoebe is like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay, Chuck, thanks for checking in. Always a pleasure. I'm gonna go show the world that I have superpowers by healing my friend. Okay, love you. Bye.
Julia: And then Phoebe goes-
Julia (as Phoebe): Oh, fuck I said love you to a Moose god.
Eric (as Chuck Moose): I love you too, Phoebe.
[Julia as Phoebe gasps]
Julia: Phoebe starts crying.
Amanda: Best case scenario!
Julia: Carrie-Ann turns and just sees Phoebe crying tears of joy.
Brandon: I hear wedding bells in the future.
Amanda: Carrie-Ann's like-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I also cry when reading the only book I own which is the manual for Camp Diogenes. That's true.
Julia (as Phoebe): Mhm. Okay, Carrie-Ann.
Julia: And then like Phoebe like, puts the book down like, like more determined than you've ever seen Phoebe be before.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, Phoebe.
Julia: Like, put it on the nightstand. And it's like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay, we're gonna do this because I- [in a more determined note] -control the power of nature!
Julia: And then Phoebe looks at Carrie-Ann like expectedly.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, you do.
Julia (as Phoebe): Cool!
Julia: And then Phoebe just like slaps a hand onto Carrie-Ann's shoulder.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): This is good. See, now I feel pain and not itch. Perfect.
Julia: And I am going to use my new move that I got when I leveled up, which I have taken from the Hex Playbook in the Tome of Mysteries, and is called This Might Sting.
Amanda: Yes.
Julia: Basically it is, “you can use magic to heal 3 harm but the process is exceptionally painful. On a 7 to 9 it also leaves a gnarly scar.”
Amanda: Sick.
Eric: Cool. Alright. So Phoebe, what is this even before we roll here? What does this look like?
Julia: So I think we've kind of established that Phoebe's magic looks like electric blue electricity kind of flowing out of her. And I think as she does this magic, it radiates from icy electric blue into kind of a deep mossy green, which then spreads over the injured parts of Carrie-Ann.
Amanda: Nice.
Eric: I like that. Carrie-Ann, I think also as it starts to grow, and as things get messy, and things are literally growing on you. Hey, man, you feel things are taking root in your skin. And it feels weird and bad. I don't know if you've ever been either a dartboard or dirt before but you know? I can only imagine that it feels weird and strange.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: As things are taking root inside of it and trying to I guess like there's moss that grows all over the acidic ooze burned parts of you, which must be the majority of your shoulder. And I think maybe down your side-
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: -and down your leg as well.
Amanda: Yeah. Do you guys know how moss is the first thing to grow in an environment like when there's no life there. For example, volcanic lava that has cooled? Moss is the first thing to happen there and like lichen and when it eventually births soil then other plants can grow. And so I'm picturing almost like moss as a scab, kind of over that harmed skin and then eventually it dries out and crumbles and falls off and hopefully not too gnarly of a scar underneath there.
Julia: We'll see.
Amanda: We'll see.
Eric: We'll see. Alright.
Amanda: Carrie-Ann yells-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Is this cramps? Is that what they were talking about?
Julia (as Phoebe): Carrie-Ann, I didn't know my magic would give you periods. No!
[Amanda as Carrie-Ann yells]
Eric: Oh, my god.
Julia: Perhaps the silliest thing we've ever said on this podcast.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: Also what it felt like to be told about cramps and then be like good luck, and you're like what?
Eric: Alright, let's do. Let's, let's do this.
Amanda: Where are they? What? When?
Julia: I rolled a 5 + 2 for a 7.
Eric: Alright, for a 7.
Julia: So, good news. It did heal you.
Amanda: Nice, great.
Eric: Okay. I think that after a while the digging into your skin, Carrie-Ann, starts to subside and you can like pull the moss off of it.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: I think that on your shoulder specifically where, where Phoebe put her hands. I think that there's just like a very mottled scar of a hand on your shoulder.
Amanda: Oh, fun.
Eric: I- even looks like raised moss a little bit.
Amanda: That's a-
Eric: You know how like burns sometimes look raised like that? I think it looks like that. Now you have like a raised mossy patch on your shoulder in the shape of Phoebe's hand.
Julia: Is it like tinge to green as well?
Eric: Oh, absolutely for sure.
Amanda: Sick.
Eric: I think there's a little bit like there's still the green of the moss in there
Amanda: Well you know how like healing skin has kind of like a different pallor than the skin around it.
Eric: Yeah. yeah.
Amanda: When you like look at it under the right light because Carrie-Ann is very pale it has almost like a greenish like healing bruise kind of look.
Eric: Yeah, I would also say on the 7 to 9 because this move just says it's incredibly painful. I'll say on a 7 to 9, you're wiped out, you need to stay in the infirmary for the rest of this time you cannot, you're going to get the + will the 1 heal when you we start the next mystery regardless and you got to stay in bed for the next few days.
Julia: Okay.
Eric: This took a lot out of you.
Julia: Phoebe's like, fine with that.
Amanda: Yeah. So I had 4 harm and unstable marks before. No longer unstable because we are in the infirmary. I got three harm healed?
Eric: I think you're 3 harm healed.
Amanda: Dang.
Eric: This was also incredibly painful.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: So if you want to do something now you can do this with one harm. But the next time we do a straight-up mystery you're at 0 because Phoebe did healing powers on you.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Sick. Thanks, Phoebe. That was awesome.
Eric: Alright.
Julia: Phoebe's like-
Julia (as Phoebe): Umm... well, the scar looks kind of cool. And if you think about it, I used the magic of camp to heal you so it's like exclusive camp merch?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I was planning on my first camp tattoo when I turned 16 to go to Canada but this is amazing.
Julia (as Phoebe): Oh god, I'm so happy that you're happy. Ugh.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Thank you. You're my best friend. Phoebe, you have a purpose apart from me but my purpose is your higher purpose.
[sobs]
Julia: We just, we just like hug each other and cry for like five minutes.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: Les has come to visit you and walk through the door and is like-
Brandon (as Les): Uhh... what the fuck?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Les, look at my sick scar?
Eric: I just like the idea of you’re hugging each other crying and Les walks in with like a waffle.
Amanda: And Les goes-
Amanda (as Les): Is this about periods? Because I'm not gonna stick around.
Julia (as Phoebe): I accidentally gave Carrie-Ann her first period and this cool scar.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): It's okay. It's okay. It's fine. I'm an adult now, it's fine. It's fine.
Brandon (as Les): Cool. I'm gonna go stretch.
Julia (as Phoebe): Okay.
Eric: Oh, it's so funny. Fuck. Okay, yeah, I think the three of you are together now if Les, you did want to come say hi. But I don't know if that was a joke or not but whatever you want to do next I'm down for.
Brandon: It was a joke but I do want to- Les, would come to visit and make sure everyone's feeling okay. But-
Eric: Now the joke is real! It's canon, whatever.
Brandon: Well, I think it would be more towards the evening like maybe like pre dinner or after dinner when Les comes to visit because I would assume that Phoebe DBB is sort of like snoozing. So I'm gonna go walk over to Miss Camp herself. And say hello.
Amanda: Do you want to talk to me separately?
Brandon: Yes, because currently, Les is scared of Phoebe.
Julia: Great.
Eric: Oh, yeah.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah.
Eric: Do it!
Brandon: I'm gonna walk up to Carrie-Ann and say-
Brandon (as Les): Is Phoebe asleep? Are we good? Is it chill?
Amanda: I look over and Phoebe has fully passed out with the book like-
Brandon: On your face.
Amanda: Yeah, on her forehead. Exactly.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, she um, she did some, some pretty cool stuff like you know with Boo and like the, the healing and the scar and stuff. So she, she helped me really feel, feel a lot better. So I have a, have to pick on apple tonight. Wink Wink, wink wink, wink.
Brandon (as Les): What?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): But then, we should both be out of here tomorrow.
Brandon (as Les): Okay. She- you let her lay hands on you kind of thing?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, no, see, it was just the one and it's I got an awesome scar.
Brandon (as Les): And you're okay?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Oh, no, I feel much better. Before it felt like a million little needles were poking up out of my skin. And then it was like they were all poking back into my skin. But now they're gone and that's the important part.
Brandon (as Les): Hm.
Eric: Les, I want to reiterate what you're looking at now when Assistant Director Z picked both of them up. They had like acid ooze scars or burns on their skin all over. And you were there as both of you rushed to the nurses' office in Assistant Director Z's golf cart. And that was like, what? 24 hours ago? Less than 24 hours ago?
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: And now. Now as Carrie’s showing off her scar, there's no burn on Carrie-Ann except for this green handprint that looks like moss like real grown on rocks moss in the shape of Phoebe's hand.
Brandon: Right. Yeah, and I think Les is sort of like, obviously taken aback by this. And so I think he's like maybe a little bit- not suspicious of Carrie-Ann herself, but like, definitely has bookmarked in his brain of like, watch out for side effects, you know, kind of thing.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): How are you? How was the last day, is everything okay?
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, I mean, everything's fine on my end. I'm glad that we could get to you. I'm sorry for leaving, but I don't know what's going on with Phoebe. But I don't know if it's like part of becoming a woman but it's kind of scary. So I'm glad that she's asleep because I wanted to- I wanted to see if you wanted to maybe figure some stuff out with me. Maybe this time Phoebe can- we can just let Phoebe rest, you know?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Um, what like about, about Phoebe?
Brandon (as Les): No. Well, no. So ah we both know we both saw that the like horse thing, right?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Mhm. Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): That was real.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): And we saw the sentient skeleton.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, I was- that some- can I let you in on a little secret?
Brandon (as Les): Yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): That's what picking apples is. I want to go-
Brandon (as Les): Oh, that's what the fuck you were talking about?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I thought you might think it was it was periods but it's not. I-
Brandon (as Les): No, I didn't know what the fuck it was, I don't know what.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I want to go sneak into the director's office. Sorry. It was hard for me to say a breaking rule. It's just like my mouth wouldn’t do it. Okay. I want to go into the office of the director.
Brandon (as Les): You can write it down if you want to.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Oh, yeah, no, that's good. No, but then I leave evidence! Fudge. And I-
Eric: I need to go get a whiteboard now. Shit.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I need to figure out what's going on with Steven because maybe they have had a truce so far, but I don't trust that it feels like either stuff is getting worse. Or there was a lot more here than I knew about and someone has to do something about it.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah. I love that. That's good that you were thinking about that because well, I was thinking about tracking ADZ. You were kind of passed out, but he displayed some extra skills.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Sure.
Brandon (as Les): I'm kind of freaking out a little bit with all these monsters and people displayed abilities and-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): I gotta get some answers. So like, I love your plan. I would love to do it together or we can you know have the buddy system where we check in each other at a certain time if we don't check in and then we know-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, yeah.
Brandon (as Les): -to go rescue but like, you know, I think family stick together.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): We are, we are best friends. And that that is the ultimate thing a person can be to each other.
Brandon (as Les): Yep. No, no bigger bond than third cousins four times removed.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, exactly. Or else there wouldn't be a name for it. Like why would they even bother?
Brandon (as Les): Exactly.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah. No, I think Phoebe does need to rest but like, sorry, I just I was a little worried that you were wanting me to like find out stuff about Phoebe. Which like, I wouldn't feel cool doing.
Brandon (as Les): No.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Because like, we're best friends. We have to stick together.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): But, but like we, you know, she does need to rest, she like- it was painful for me. I bet it was it was difficult for her because like, I mean, you see it right like it. It's all gone except for the sick tattoo scar. I'm gonna call it a tattoo scar now. And-
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, the curse that she laid upon you. Yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): It was more of like taking away a hurt and I don't know if I will call it a curse.
Brandon (as Les): Okay.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): But anyway, as long as you're okay, cuz I don't want to like be doing stuff. Like she knows I'm gonna be I'm gonna do stuff tonight.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I just I don't want to like have any secrets between us, you know?
Brandon (as Les): No. Yeah, I'm cool. I'm fine. I'm cool.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): You know what the camp manual says, right?
Eric: The guy who says you there's a curse laid upon you? Totally cool.
Julia: Cool and fine.
Brandon (as Les): Totally cool and fine. I'm just picking apples, you know? Does that-- Did I use that, right?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Um, it's pretty much I just if I if I could just like remind you of of a quote from my my holy text. Would it be cool?
Brandon (as Les): The Bible?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): No, the 1980 edition of the Camp Die handbook. It does say that. Secrets in staff are like mold trapped under a canoe under a tarpaulin put away for dry storage in the winter. They'll rot your whole shit out overnight, man. So-
Eric: Yeah, the 1980 guide was republished.
Amanda: It was not copy edited.
Eric: There was a 1981 Camp edition immediately afterwards. There was a big debate on whether or not they should republish it because no one looked at the manuscript before it went out to print but-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah. I got it at a library book sale, it's pretty sick.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, So there's a, like eight second silence.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: And then Les says-
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, I mean, do you want to go or what do you think?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna go when the clock strikes 9 and the raven caws. And so if I'm-
Brandon (as Les): What?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): If, if I am I'm going to like do you have any suggestions because like I can after my thing check and make sure your things okay or like vice versa?
Brandon (as Les): Yeah. So I've thought about this, right? So a really good way to keep track of each other when we go tripping and there's no cell phone service or do we have cell phones I forget.
Eric: Sat phones, sat phones.
Brandon (as Les): Sat phones, but there's no way to reach each other easily. So we have these little like, two-three way communicator things that just like beep. There little lights and they work on like electromagnetic fields and I don't really understand them fully. I got them from like a you know, a guy at the back of a military surplus supply store.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): That's where I get all my camp shorts. It's fine.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah. But yeah-
Julia: What’s wrong with us?
Eric (as D. Willy): Hi, I’m Decommissioned Willie, you can just come to my van and buy any of the various things you need: communication devices, camp clothing, pots and pans. Things for Williams Sonoma that I found! It's all here at Decommissioned Willie's van.
Julia: Is that Springer's side hustle? Is that what’s happening there?
Eric (as D. Willy): Different character!
Amanda: They're married though.
Brandon: They're married. Oh, that's cute.
Brandon (as Les): But yeah, so we use them to like if we're trying like if we ever tried to triangulate a monster, we would use them to coordinate actions. So-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): I think let's set our watches to each other's and then if we don't check in within like-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Les?
Brandon (as Les): Four hours.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Les, before you and Phoebe wake up every morning, I sent all three of our watches to each other's watches. Okay? We're never out of sync.
Brandon (as Les): Oh, shit. That's Hey, hey, Carrie-Ann?
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): That's fucking cool.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Thanks. You're my best friend. And Phoebe. We're all best friends.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, you and I are best friends and Phoebe.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Is- is our best friend. Also.
Julia: I'm gonna cry over here on my side of the recording.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): No, that sounds great. I can like beep you once when I when I'm successful and beat you twice if you need help if I need help, and vice versa.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah, I just, I, we just do like SOS dot dot dot dash dash dash dot dot dot.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Oh, great. Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Sick
Brandon (as Les): Cool. All right, put your hand in.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): I mean, I don't think I'm comfortable doing like a group activity without Phoebe.
Brandon (as Les): Break
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): But I can tell her. I'll just I'll fill her in. When when she wakes up.
Brandon: Cool. Don't tell Phoebe exactly where I am. You can tell her what I'm doing. But like-
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Uhhh... I'm going to tell her exactly where you are.
Brandon (as Les): Okay. Cool. Alright. Um.
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Yeah.
Brandon (as Les): Break!
Amanda (as Carrie-Ann): Like, if if, okay. Break.
Eric (as D. Willy): Hi, I'm Decommissioned Willie! You would use this communicator to say all types of things. S.O.S., A.S.S., P.O.O., D.A.D., any of those things!
Julia: Why is dad in the mix?
Brandon: Poo dad!
Eric (as D. Willy): My dad was unhappy I got decommissioned from the military. Couldn’t you tell?
Amanda: Oh, no.
Eric (as D. Willy): Now I'm selling things that I found at Fort Braggart out of my van!
Eric: Yes, Julia, do you have questions?
Julia: So many, Eric, but not the time.
[Brandon giggles]
[theme]
Transcriptionist: KM