Are you doing anything between Christmas and New Year’s? Ah, me neither. Aggie makes an ice run. Val tries not to get hangry. Milo floats on.
Housekeeping
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Cast & Crew
- Dungeon Master, Co-Producer: Eric Silver
- Co-Host (Milo Lane), Co-Producer, Editor, Sound Designer, Composer: Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host (Aggie O’Hare), Co-Producer: Amanda McLoughlin
- Co-Host (Val Vesuvio), Co-Producer, Editor: Julia Schifini
- Multitude: multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is a collaborative storytelling and roleplaying podcast, powered by the rules of Dungeons and Dragons. That means a group of friends create a story together, chapter by chapter, that takes us beyond the tabletop to parts unknown. In the first campaign, we explored fantasy adventure, intrigue, magic, and drama. In the newest story, we tackle science, superpowers, a better future, and the responsibility to help others.
Every month, we sit down for the Afterparty, where we break down our game and answer your questions about how to play D&D and other roleplaying games at home. We also have segments at the beginning of each campaign to teach people how to play the game themselves. It’s a party, and you’re invited! Find out more at jointhepartypod.com.
Transcript
Amanda: Last time on Join the Party.
Eric (to the tune of “O Christmas Tree”): O Gigabear O Gigabear
Why’d you destroy our science?
O Gigabear O Gigabear
You run on 64-bit compliance
The MMFC almost came down
But Vulcani gave you a beatdown
O Gigabear O Gigabear
Those drones came out of nowhere.
O Lucas Friend O Lucas Friend
I wonder where Milo went
O Lucas Friend O Lucas Friend
This sure was a big event
Good thing that Quinn actually helped
And did what her big sister yelped
O Lucas Friend, O Lucas Friend
Wait, is Dr. Morrow OK?
[Upbeat Music]
Eric: I would like six weeks of Christmas carols a lot more if they were based on my Dungeon and Dragons campaign. Let's get the party started.
[JTP Theme Music]
Eric: But, hey, we're at the end of an arc. So, let's do some leveling up, shall we?
Julia: Let's do it.
Brandon: Yay. I'm excited for levels.
Eric: Thank you. That's the enthusiasm I crave, Brandon. Please deliver that to me all the time.
Brandon: I'm excited for levels.
Eric: Great. Thank you. Good. That's very good. So, here's what happened. Val and Milo, you get two levels. And, Aggie, here's a secret surprise for you. You get two levels. And then I think of days after when you're just like – you're thinking about like, “Wow. I can't believe. I thought a giant 8-bit bear.” But then it's like, “Oh, no, wait. I didn't. I didn't run in and sacrifice my body against the giant bear. I used all my information and my smarts. That's what the volcano thing was trying to teach me.”
Brandon (as Milo): I don't get it. What?
Eric: Yeah, I know. That's why this is not happening to you, Milo. So, Aggie, you get an extra here, that half a level, because you interacted with the Gollum box and you used it in part to your actual knowledge of buildings and things. And you let Quinn do her thing, which ultimately turned out to be a good thing. You get that extra half level. So, you get three levels.
Amanda (as Aggie): Wow, level eight.
Brandon (as Milo): Dang.
Eric: This is like DM inspiration, but I want you to surprise me. And I want to give you actual benefits other than advantage one time. So, it's just about character growth, man. It's just about your journey.
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah, sure. I mean I'm already perfect. So, that’ll never happen for me.
Eric: That's true. Milo has a card that says by Milo Lane, perfect boy.
Brandon: He does. Did he give you one?
Eric: Yeah, he did. He got it – he made it on Vistaprint and gave it to me. And I'm like, “You have great deals. Might as well – I'm sure you have 250 of these.”
Brandon: He accidentally ordered 5,000.
Eric: He was like, “It was the best deal. What am I supposed to do? I got 10 percent off.”
Amanda (as Aggie): Only rubes pay for shipping.
Eric: So, now, Milo and Val are level seven and a half and – which is just level eight.
Amanda (as Aggie): Wooh!
Eric: So, tell me some of the cool stuff y'all get and tell me your HP.
Julia (as Val): So, Val got two new class features. One is a feral instinct, which gives me advantage on initiative. And I can't be surprised --
Brandon: Ooh.
Julia (as Val): -- in combat.
Amanda: Dang.
Julia (as Val): That's cool.
Brandon: Very fancy.
Julia (as Val): And I also got a very cool Battlerager thing called Reckless Abandon. So, when I attack with reckless attack, I gain temporary hit points equal to my constitution modifier.
Brandon: That is nice.
Julia (as Val): Yeah.
Eric: That's probably helpful for the tank.
Julia (as Val): Yeah, very useful.
Eric: Very useful. Very useful.
Julia (as Val): It ends when I finished raging, but it is very cool.
Eric: Do you ever finish raging though? Like, aren’t you just always raging?
Julia (as Val): No, I'm always in a rage.
Eric: Like, emotionally?
Brandon: Deep. That’s deep.
Julia (as Val): My soul, always in a rage.
Eric: And then Hitomi is like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Sit down. We're watching a movie.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: Julia, what's your HP?
Julia: 69.
Eric: Nice.
Brandon: Nice.
Eric: Good job. Proud of you.
Brandon: Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, nice.
Julia: I rolled that, too.
Eric: Good.
Julia: I’m very proud of my dice.
Amanda: I have 59 hit points. Still nice.
Julia: Hmm.
Eric: Nice in a different way.
Amanda: My favorite part of leveling up is that I get more key points. And, now, I have eight to burn. And I get a couple cool monk things. So, I've key empowered strikes. Meaning that my punches are magic now. So, my arm strikes count as magical for the purpose of, like, overcoming resistance and immunity to non-magical attacks and damage. So, even if a creature is immune to non-magical attacks, I can still attack them.
Julia: Nice.
Brandon: That's great.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: I also have evasion in combat, stillness of mind, which means as an action, I can end an effect on myself. That makes me either charmed or frightened.
Julia: Whoa.
Amanda: I'm very excited about that one. But, best of all, this is the reason I chose this subclass for Aggie. It's called emissary of peace. So, I can basically defuse violent situations. And the way the mechanic works is, whenever I make a charisma check to either calm violent emotions or council peace, I get advantage. I have to do it in good faith. It can't be, like, either deception or intimidation. And I also gain proficiency in the performance or persuasion skill.
Eric: Hot dang.
Julia: Just checking in with Aggie, how’s your charisma?
Amanda (as Aggie): My charisma, Julia, is now one.
[Brandon and Eric laugh]
Julia: Hah. Yay.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yay.
Julia: No negatives anymore.
Brandon: Are you gonna become a politician? Do you think?
Amanda (as Aggie): I think not, but I think I will take my proficiency here in performance because I'm already pretty good at persuasion.
Julia: Alright.
Eric: Hey, Milo, I hear you're just a druid. So, I assume that this is just gonna be like --
Julia: Normal Druid shit.
Eric: -- some plant. So, you’re like, “Oh, look at this plant. Nice.”
Brandon (as Milo): Actually, kinda. Yeah. It's all just normal Druid stuff. Mostly, I got some more hit points. I'm up to 44. I got a level four spell slot. So, now, I have two of my special spells, which are blight and confusion --
Julia: Whoa.
Brandon (as Milo): -- as well as other fourth level spells. And, most importantly, my big change is my feature called Connect with the Dead, which, basically, I get to cast – speak with the dead for free. And, when I do that, I get to roll on the revived capabilities table and there's different effects. Like, I get to learn language of my choice, or learn a proficiency, or gain proficiency on a saving throw, or cast one spell at my highest spell slot for free.
Amanda: Wow.
Brandon (as Milo): And, so, various things like that.
Julia: That's pretty cool.
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah, I get to be like Haley Joel Osment and, and see dead people. It's great.
Julia: Mhmm. Mhmm. Mhmm.
Eric: Wonderful. Okay. So, Vulcani and the Preserver talked to Channel Seven and a Half News, cleared everything up. The museum is safe. Canonical person in Lake Town City, Jake, Julia's husband, he is getting the construction of MMFC down. And it's getting repaired after nearly falling over. The snow plows came through. People can drive once again after the Great Blizzard of 20XX.
Julia: I need to let you know that I told him that after that session and he's like, “Yeah, that's what I would do.”
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: So, yeah, before we go into Christmas time and what happens there at the end of December, do you – any of you three want to tie up any particular loose ends?
Amanda: No, I think Aggie’s only things that she wants to accomplish are buying a couple of last minute gifts and figuring out what she's doing for Christmas.
Eric: Wonderful. That sounds good. Val, Milo, do you have anything you want to pull on?
Brandon: Not really. I think Milo – the only thing Milo would have is, like, the opposite of pulling on a thread of, like, Milo’s just avoiding having to talk to Lucas. I don't think he's seen much of Lucas in the intervening days. And he's purposely avoiding his texts and calls.
Eric: Yes, that's a great question. Why don't you make a charisma check for me?
Brandon: Okay. Nine minus 148.
Eric: Okay. So, you are intentionally avoiding Lucas for sure. You're not, like, responding anything. You notice Apple has been sending a lot of links in the group text between the four of you.
Brandon: Is he just, like, dropping like, “Oh, man, I wonder if I'm gonna get this for the holiday season? Oooh.
Eric: No, it's – it’s – I mean not even, like – it's not even, like, presents, which you would assume that something Apple would do. Or, like, hack into your computer and put it in your downloads.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: So, you’d be like, “What's this?” You’re like, “Oh.” Like, trying to incept you in your computer. No Apples like posting links to funny and stupid videos and posting those, like, terrible click baity articles that are nothing.
Brandon: Hmm.
Eric: And he's, like, really trying to blow up the group chat a lot.
Amanda: A lot of average bear stuff.
Eric: Yeah, lots of average bear stuff.
Brandon: Interesting. Well, I think Milo has put the group chat on Do Not Disturb for now.
Julia: Ahhh.
Brandon: Because he's trying to avoid the problem because it's Milo and he's bad at solving problems.
[Julia chuckles]
Eric: Nice. Hey, everybody, if this is your first episode, great characterization of Milo.
[Julia and Brandon laughs]
Eric: Yeah, that was up.
Julia: I don't know. I think Val is kind of keeping an eye out for family drama right now.
Eric: Sure. Sure. Sure.
Julia: But also spending a lot of time kind of, like, in between hanging out with Hitomi and spending time with their mom.
Eric: Wonderful. Why don't you make a charisma check as well for me?
Julia: Cool. Just straight charisma?
Eric: Straight up.
Julia: Nineteen plus two.
Eric: Wonderful, 21.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: On December 23rd, you get a knock at the door. Can you remind me again how Val gets presents from their dad?
Julia: Just an Amazon wish list I feel like.
Eric: That's right. It was Amazon wish list. Did you add anything particular like a – like a Christmas item as if this was Toys R Us and it had to be the biggest thing on the page?
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia: Oh, I’m not sure. I feel like they put on maybe some – again, Hitomi’s been showing them a lot of anime lately. So, I feel like there's, like, a box set of something that they wanted to get to impress her. But --
Eric: Oh, yeah.
Julia: -- maybe that and, also, like, a pallet of, like, really good organic San Marzano tomatoes.
Eric: Ooh.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: From Italy.
Amanda: Wow.
Eric: Oh, that's a bad choice.
Amanda: Can that fit through a door? I guess you could take the crates off.
Julia: Yeah, I mean like – I'm, I’m talking about, like, the supermarket sized one.
Amanda: Okay. I thought you're saying like a shipping pallet. And I was like --
Julia: No.
Amanda: “Holy shit. Are you gonna take over the kitchen in the Slice Shop?”
Eric: Please be clear with Amanda what type of shipping container you think is coming.
[Everyone laughs]
Julia: It’s probably like a 24 can sized one.
Eric: So, yeah, you get a knock on the door. He says --
[Audio play]
Eric (as the UPS Guy): Hey, yeah. So, I got a package for Val V. Vesuvio.
Julia (as Val): Okay. That's – why with my middle? Okay. I open the door.
Eric: There's a UPS guy standing there who gives you a package. He’d be like, “Alright. Hold on. Get out of the way.” And two ups guys are coming in, wheeling in on one of those, like, wheelie carts.
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric: -- a five foot tall figurine of All Might from My Hero Academia.
Julia: Incredible. Very, very cool.
Eric: So, uh – so, you're into anime?
Julia (as Val): Please don't talk to me.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: Alright. Okay. Sign here.
Julia (as Val): Sign.
Eric: Oh, yeah. So, inside is this Japanese-only, like, Special Edition All – My Hero Academia with, like, the subs and the dubs. I don't even know where this DVD comes from because it doesn't exist in the year of our Lord, the real world, 2020.
Brandon: Subs, the dubs, the abs, the mobs, it’s all there.
[Eric laughs]
Eric: All the – all the abs, they're all there.
Amanda: Can I – can I just propose subs and dubs as a laundromat/comic book store?
Eric: Great.
Brandon: 100 percent. It's very good.
Eric: Yeah. And you're setting it up.
Julia: This is the coolest shit.
Eric: And stuffed into All Might’s hand is a Christmas card.
Julia (as Val): Okay. I pull it out and I open it.
Eric: Yeah, it's a photo of your dad with his third wife, Janine --
Brandon: Oh.
Eric: -- and his three triplets, which he had with Janine. And they're all like five.
Julia: [Inaudible 12:30].
Amanda: Okay, guys. I'm going to write down what I think Eric is going to name these triplets.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: And then I’m going to ask him. And then I will show you.
Eric: Do you think I named them Huey, Dewey, and Louie?
Julia: No.
Brandon: Yep.
Eric: Amanda wrote it out and she has Huey, Dewey, and Louie.
Julia: Okay.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: Great. I wrote Vito, Vinny, and Angelo.
Amanda: Haa, that's very good, too.
Brandon: Okay. I just wrote Suds, Duds, and Buds. So --
Julia: Huh!
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Brandon, that's – that's – that is the laundromat, anime store, and weed dispensary.
[Brandon and Julia laughs]
Julia: That’s very good.
Amanda: Julia, can I, yes, and… Angela into, like --
Julia: Viola.
Amanda: There you go.
Eric: Oh, very nice.
Julia: Vito, Vinny, and Viola.
Eric: Vito, Vinny, and Viola.
Amanda: Oh, my god.
Eric: 100 percent. And, on the back of the card says, “From our family to you.”
Julia: Ouch!
[Everyone laughs]
Julia: I’m gonna need --
Amanda: That’s fun. Some Neosporin for that burn.
Julia: I love it. Go ahead.
Eric: Remember where – who is your family and what that means, family. And family underlined on one side at the end.
Julia: Like, every member of my family does when they send cards, underlining random words.
Eric: Yeah, underline family. And then it says, “From Marco, Janine, and Triple V.”
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: So, that was, like, written in Janine’s, like, really calligraphy ass handwriting.
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric: And, at the bottom, in your dad's scrawling indecipherable doctor ass handwriting --
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric: -- it says PS, tell Minerva I say hello.
Julia: Cool.
Eric: And he underlines hello.
Amanda: Yikes.
Julia (as Val): Oh, I love my dad.
Eric: Wonderful. Okay. So, here's a funny thing that happened a few sessions ago.
Julia: Uh-oh.
Eric: I asked the three of you, “Hey, if there's something you're – you, three, want to do or you want to explore just let me know.” And then you, three, came back with, “We really want to throw a party.”
[Brandon and Julia laughs]
Amanda: Yes. Yes, we did.
Julia: It was like, “How can we make Eric talk to himself for 90 percent of the episode?”
Amanda: Yeah.
[Eric chuckles]
Eric: Yeah. Yeah.
Brandon: Yeah, that was the real reasoning. Amanda was like, “Hmm, I have a devious plan.”
Amanda: It was directly after the Milo friend hang out in the bowling alley. And I was like, “Oh, wait. What if all of these NPCs and my family and Dr. Morrow and January are all in --
Brandon: Kiss.
Amanda: -- Aggie’s bungalow for a holiday party?
Julia: Also, kiss.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: No.
Eric: And everyone kisses. So, yeah, let's start it. So, I think, what you talked about was that this was asked Christmas.
Amanda: Yeah, I think, once everybody gets past all the December holidays, it's nice to sort of have an activity in that week between Christmas and New Year that lots of people take off work and school and whatever.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: So, I think it's probably a tradition of Aggie just to, like, have the stragglers who are still at home in Lake Town City come over just to her bungalow and, like, do a potluck. You know, bring whatever booze you want and hang out, including standing around on the back patio, like, deep frying a turkey or something.
Julia: Hell yeah.
[Eric laughs]
Amanda: So, I, I think Quinn is a definite yes. I'll probably text, you know, these guys; Dr. Morrow and January and Dez in our group thread with the three of them and just sort of say like, you know, if, if someone's around who needs a place to hang out, you know, bring them.
Julia: Cool.
Eric: Wonderful. I like this. I feel like we're starting an improv scene.
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: So, this is – so, I think that, yeah, you text the other group thread and January is like --
Eric (as January): Yeah, I don’t have much to do. Yeah, I’ll come over. That’s fine. Dez, can you come pick me up?
Eric (as Dez): Yeah, I was just in the area.
Brandon: Hold on one second. Are --
Julia: We're gonna have to explain talking rabbit to all of these people.
Brandon: I was gonna say are normal people okay with the talking rabbit?
Eric: Yeah, man. Not my place. It’s not my party.
Amanda (as Aggie): Exclude January.
Eric: It’s not my party.
Julia: Fine. Listen, everyone's gonna have to get used to talking rabbit. I don't care.
Amanda: (Sigh) Ahhh, that's true.
Eric (as January): Everyone loves someone. It looks like I’m drinking a beer and then I do KC at the back. Everyone loves it.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: Very cute.
Brandon: I guess, when you have Dr. Morrow as a Mayor, like nothing's weird anymore, you know.
Julia: Yeah. No, it's fine. I love it. I love that we're gonna have to explain a talking rabbit to a lot of people. That's fun for me.
Eric: Yeah, you also text Quinn and Quinn’s like --
Eric (as Quinn): Hey, yeah, can I bring – I have a friend in area who is just like really – you know, who is this cool guy. I’ll bring her – I’ll bring her up.
Amanda (as Aggie): January is coming, but, as long as you trust her/she will think that it is a prank somehow/she's cool staying outside? Then that works.
Eric (as Quinn): Aggie, you’re the best. I love January.
Amanda (as Aggie): Okay. Maybe I'm, again, treating this with way more seriousness than everybody else.
Eric (as Quinn): Is January a secret? Is January – like, should people not know about January?
Amanda (as Aggie): I don’t know. I don't know.
Eric (as Quinn): Oh, yeah. No, because you had, had January before, which is the same thing as like, “Oh, I didn't know about Tom Waits. And I met Tom Waits. I listen to his music.” And then is like, “Oh, hell yeah.”
Brandon: Eric, Tom Waits is a secret.
Julia: Secret Tom Waits.
Amanda: I think I'll check in with January and say, you know, is it okay if we have some friends or friends at the party in Re: Your security clearance.
Eric (as January): Oh, yeah, man. I would really love it when I’m drinking a beer and doing [Inaudible 17:38].
[Brandon and Julia laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): January, you're wonderful and a dear friend. And then I --
Eric (as January): Well, thank you.
Amanda (as Aggie): I tell Quinn yes.
Eric: Hell yeah. Milo, you get a text from the group chat. And Apple’s like --
Eric (as Apple): Hey, what are you, guys, doing? I’m gonna celebrate --
Brandon (as Milo): Apple, why are you yelling on text?
Eric (as Apple): So, I can get my point across.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Apple): Hey, I’m not doing anything. I don’t do any because, you know, shows people are Jewish. So, hey, just doing everything right. Zak’s already over. So, we're just hanging out. But, like, what are you doing?
Brandon (as Milo): I'm going to this, this shindig at, at Aggie’s place, you know, for the --
Eric (as Apple): Oh, cool.
Brandon (as Milo): -- for the locals. Do you want to come?
Eric (as Apple): Oh, fuck yeah, dude. Let’s all go.
Brandon (as Milo): Okay.
Eric: And then Zak replies with a GIF with – which is just a thumbs up.
Brandon (as Milo): Can y'all both bring something to this party and not just like show up and crash? Like, like, I'm not saying that that's what you'd normally do. But, like, that is what you don't really do, you know.
Eric: Lucas responds.
Eric (as Lucas): That is what we normally do.
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah. Can you, like, bring a food or, like, a drink or something?
Eric: Apple says --
Eric (as Apple): Yeah, I got some chips that I haven’t eaten from, like, Y2K. Is that fine?
Brandon (as Milo): Is it – are they open already?
Eric (as Apple): I have to check.
Brandon (as Milo): Okay. Let me clarify. Bring something that's unopened, please.
Eric: Zak responds with the same thumbs up GIF.
[Brandon and Julia laughs]
Amanda: When in doubt, order pizza to the party.
Eric: Yeah. Wonderful. Alright. Cool. Cool.
Julia: Val's gonna invite Hitomi and their mom.
Amanda: Ooh.
Eric: Ooh.
Julia: Hmm.
Amanda (as Aggie): I'll also tell the O'Hare family group chat and just, like, if Quinn comes over a little early to help set up or whatever, just, like, text them a selfie of the two of us.
Eric: Cool. Love it. Yeah, the group text has a lot of apologies. They’re like --
Eric (as Danny): Oh, I’d love to go, but I’m doing --
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Danny): -- this really strange famous thing.
Julia: Hmm.
Amanda: Still in Berlin. Love you.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah, that’s what Danny says in Berlin. You knew that.
[Julia laughs]
Eric: Ryan takes a photo of him and Travis Pastrana and Shawn White.
Julia: Hmm. Sure.
Eric: It seems like they're in the air, which is concerning.
[Everyone laughs]
Julia: Incredible.
Amanda: And I think Reagan Texas, like, a selfie she took while on stage in, like, Tokyo or some shit.
Eric: Reagan's, like, busy.
[Julia and Brandon laughs]
Eric: But also says to Quinn --
Eric (as Reagan): Oh, Quinn tell [Inaudible 20:04] I said hi.
Julia: Hmm.
Eric: And Quinn says --
Eric (as Quinn): Got it.
Julia: Ooh.
Eric: But, yeah, everyone – now, everyone comes through. So, Aggie you're getting ready and you're gonna set up the party.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah, I think I’ll just kind of push the furniture, you know, a little bit to the sides of the room, make sure the patio is, is clear of any snow drifts, and pick up a bunch of, you know, chips and drinks and stuff at the local Stuart’s.
Eric: Wonderful. I like it. Will you make a perception check for me?
Amanda (as Aggie): Gladly.
[Throws dice]
Amanda (as Aggie): 18.
Eric: Okay, with an 18. So, you're at the Stuart’s and you're picking up beer and chips and stuff. And you go to the, the cashier and the cashier says --
Eric (as the cashier): Do you need any, any other help today?
Amanda (as Aggie): No, I found everything just fine. Thanks.
Eric: Alright. And you look up.
Amanda (as Aggie): Oh, god.
Eric: This guy looks exactly like Clippy.
Julia: I was gonna ask.
Eric: The bulbous nose, those shaggy 70s hair, the – he's wearing a crop top even though it's very cold out.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: Aggie goes very pale and says --
Amanda (as Aggie): Clippy?
Eric (as Steven): Excuse me?
Amanda (as Aggie): Hi, I'm a regular here. What's your name?
Eric (as Steven): Ah, yeah. Steven?
Amanda (as Aggie): Are you guessing?
Eric (as Steven): No, you just started leading by referring to me as a discontinued 90s Microsoft vehicle.
Amanda (as Aggie): I, I got confused. I was trying to say Cammy. That's what I call Camel cigarettes. Don't smoke. Here you go. I put $60 on the – on the counter and run by.
[Everyone laughs]
Eric (as Steven): Wait. So, you don't want Camel cigarettes?
Amanda (as Aggie): No, thank you.
Eric (as Steven): Alright. Have a good day. If there's anything else I can help you with?
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda (as Aggie): No, I throw my stuff in the car.
[Amanda laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): I text our three group chat with the, “SOS. No, not really sorry. I think Clippy is a cashier at Stuart's??”
Julia (as Val): What? Also, I’m at your house.
Amanda (as Aggie): I'll be right back.
Eric: I like this that Val was there early and, now, you're like setting up.
Julia: Yeah, Val showed up early with Hitomi because Hitomi insisted on getting there early.
Eric: I, I love that.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: And Hitomi’s like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, my god. I love your plates. It's so nice. Oh, are those real? Are those real Red Wings? Like, I can't even find any that fit my – that fit my foot, but I have tiny bird feet because I'm a tiny bird.
Julia: She has tiny bird bones. It's very cute.
Eric: So, while you're out of the Stuart’s, you text Val. And, Val, you and Hitomi are – I guess are just putting stuff together.
Julia (as Val): Yeah.
Eric: Maybe you might be throwing together a quick pizza. I, I don't --
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: I'm only trying to assume what Val would do.
Julia (as Val): Pizza and setting up the bar. It's very important.
Eric: Wonderful.
Julia (as Val): Hitomi and I brought stuff for Boilermakers.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah, I feel like I definitely come home and I had just a few, like, dusty liquor bottles, like, in a high cabinet in the kitchen. And, now, suddenly, I have, like, a gleaming bar setup.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Hitomi’s like --
Eric (as Hitomi): I don't even know what to put Chamboard in.
Julia: Whatever you want. That's the – the best part about Chamboard is just the taste go with everything.
Eric: Oh, babe. I love it. That's great. Thank you. Well, I love that. And, while you're setting that together, you hear a ding dong. And Quinn’s like --
Eric (as Quinn): Hey, Aggie, let me in. Aggie!
Julia (as Val): I go and answer the door.
Eric: You answer the door.
Julia (as Val): I am not Aggie.
Eric: And Quinn’s like --
Eric (as Quinn): Oh, you're not Aggie. Okay. That's fine.
Eric: And behind Quinn is Taylor Swift.
Brandon: What?
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: Hey.
Julia: HeyHey Just silence out of Val staring at Taylor Swift like --
Julia (as Val): Ah, uh, do you want a Boilermaker? What?
[Amanda and Brandon laugh]
Julia (as Val): We got Chamboard.
Eric (as Taylor): Yeah. No, I'd love – that would be so great. Thank you so much. I was just in the area. Quinn said there's gonna be a party. So, let's make it a party. Chamboard all around.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia (as Val): This is my girlfriend, Hitomi. I don't – okay.
Eric: Hitomi is just unfazed. She's like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, hell yeah, another girl who's my height. Fuck it.
[Everybody laughs]
Julia (as Val): You guys are gonna be best friends. And that's gonna be very good for me as a person.
Eric: Hitomi is just like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Hey, Taylor, so, if I – we become best friends, is this like a, a black card situation where I get a special card to like do stuff?
Eric: And Taylor is like --
Eric (as Taylor): Yes, it's exactly like that.
Julia (as Val): I'm gonna go make Boilermakers for everyone because I can't handle the situation.
Eric: And Quinn jumps up on the counter and is like --
Eric (as Quinn): Was this a – should I not – should I have not done – is this --
Julia (as Val): No, this is --
Eric (as Quinn): I mean Taylor doesn’t have anything to do.
Julia (as Val): Thank you for this gift for the holidays.
[Amanda chuckles]
Julia (as Val): I really appreciate it. Can I get you something to drink?
Eric (as Quinn): No, I'll just use my sticky hands and grab them.
Eric: And she just grabs a beer.
Brandon: No doubt.
Julia (as Val): Okay.
Eric: And she just like has it in her hand.
Julia (as Val): Very good. But, also, don't use the superpowers in front of Taylor Swift or anyone else at this party.
Eric: Okay. Whatever.
Julia (as Val): Great.
Amanda (as Aggie): I think Sushi jumps down from the top of a bookshelf and just, like, sits in Taylor's lap for the whole party.
Eric: Yeah, 100 percent.
Julia: Incredible.
Eric: Yeah. Aggie, at point, now, you're coming home. So, now, Hey, Taylor Swift's in your apartment.
Amanda (as Aggie): Quinn has done worse things to me.
[Everybody laugh]
Amanda (as Aggie): So, I – to me and I'm like, “Oh” --
Eric: Likely – like what?
Amanda (as Aggie): Like, asked me to pick her up at a party and there's 14 kids and it's below zero. So, I had to put them in my truck bed even though that is highly unsafe and, also, accidentally, flooded our childhood home because she was trying to see how long she could use Ryan's foot to stop up a drain.
Eric: Nice.
Julia: Cool.
Eric: I love that. Also, maybe one time she tried to get you to pick her up from a party and you're like, “Okay. Where?” And she, like, drops a pin. And it's the Metropolitan Museum of Art because she's at the Met Gala.
Amanda: I think she's probably also FaceTime me in famous company to be like, “How do you open a wine bottle with a key?”
Eric: And is like --
Eric (as Quinn): Jeff Goldblum and I --
[Eric and Julia laugh]
Julia: Just a poor skill to have.
Eric (as Quinn): Me and Lil Uzi Vert couldn't figure it out.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia: Yeah, exactly.
Eric: Incredible. Yeah. So, yeah, Taylor Swift’s now in your – in your bungalow.
Amanda (as Aggie): I walk in. And, honestly, the Clippy thing rattled me more. So, I'm just gonna walk in, put the stuff down, and be like, “Oh, sick the bar looks great. Yo, what's up, Hitomi? Oh, hey, I'm – I’m Aggie. I'm Quinn’s sister.”
Eric: And she's like --
Eric (as Taylor): I'm Taylor Swift.
Amanda (as Aggie): Great to meet you. I see that Sushi likes you and that is a great kind of mark of character in my book.
Eric (as Taylor): Sushi?
Amanda (as Aggie): That is – that is his name.
Eric (as Taylor): Aaaah!
Eric: And then she takes a photo of her and Sushi. And, the next day, it is the most liked photo on Instagram.
Julia: Incredible.
Brandon: Taylor Swift introduced herself as Taylor Swift.
Julia: Yes.
Brandon: Two names.
Eric: It's either that or Taytay. You're just gonna have to choose one of the two.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Alright. Wonderful. Hey, Milo, when do you – when do you show up?
Brandon (as Milo): I assume Aggie probably set a start time that's like, you know, actually 30 to 45 minutes to an hour about when she doesn't want people to show up. Like, before she wants people to actually show up.
Amanda (as Aggie): I think it’s, like, 6:45 right now and I said any time after 7:00.
Brandon: Yeah. So, I think Milo would show up probably, like, 7:15 or so.
Eric: Cool. Are you waiting for your other bros to show up before you go in?
Brandon (as Milo): No, I don't think so.
Eric: Cool.
Brandon (as Milo): I mean they're – they're adults.
Eric: I don't know, man. I don’t --
Julia: He dropped the address. He knows what's up.
Eric: Apple really tried to make you all roll as a crew for a while. It's just never got on. He's like –
Eric (as Apple): We need to go into places together all the time.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: But, yeah, that's fine. So, yeah, Milo, you come in and inside is Quinn and Taylor Swift and the rest of the assembly of people.
Julia (as Val): How’s Milo doing?
Brandon: Milo walks in. He's got, like, his hands full. He's got like a – one of those, like, big boxes, like, 18 packs of, like, assorted sours, like, in cans.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: Yeah. Yeah. Jenny – because of the advent of a new – of a new city with a new hipster area, Genesee now makes a sour pack.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: Very good.
Brandon: And, like, he's got like a – you know, like, a casserole dish full of, like, sweet potato casserole with, like, this really delicious marshmallow cookie filling or topping thing.
Amanda: Hell yeah.
Julia: Love it.
Eric: Ooh.
Brandon: And, so, he's, like, walking. He’s like --
Brandon (as Milo): Hey, Aggie, I brought some stuff.
Brandon: And then he doesn't speak the rest of the party.
[Julia and Amanda laugh]
Julia: So, I was just gonna ply him with alcohol until they can get him talking.
Eric: I like the idea you're holding it and then Hitomi, like, picks one of the serving spoon from the bain-marie and just lay open – opens the casserole up and take a scoop and be like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, yeah, that’s good stuff. Hi, I’m Hitomi.
Julia (as Val): Isn't she so cool?
Brandon: Milo just, like, nods.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric (as Hitomi): Babe, babe, this is great. We got to get one of this.
Julia: That's Milo. He can't talk right now just like I couldn't talk before.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, hell, yeah. Man, you're never gonna get Taylor's black card like that.
Eric: And she takes the casserole and gives them to Taylor.
Brandon: I also like to think that Milo, in order to deflect people's interest away from him, whenever he's uncomfortable, he just, like, summons Tuna and, like, Tuna, like, either is on his shoulder or his head the entire time.
Eric: I love that. Taylor Swift also then keeps asking you, like, really specific cat care questions.
Brandon (as Milo): And I just nod or shake my head yes or no.
Eric: Yeah.
[Eric, Julia, and Amanda laugh]
Eric: I love it.
Midroll Music
Amanda: Hey, it's Amanda. Every year, I sort of rediscover, yes, how annoying it is for it to be very dark during the fall and winter. And I'm like, “Surely, it wasn't this dark last year.” But, at the same time, I also remember how great flannel sheets are. They’re cozy. Keep your toes warm. And it's just, like, a – someone hugging you as you're sleeping in a not creepy way. So, this is the Midroll. It’s Buffalo check. Firstly, we'd like to thank each and every one of our supporters on Patreon. We're recording this in the past as the team took off last week. So, we will thank everybody who has joined in the previous week and a half in the next episode. But, in the meantime, I just want to say thank you to everybody who has decided to support us with your hard-earned human dollars. You make it possible for this to be our jobs. And it's not just like a line I'm saying. It's true, especially in a year as tumultuous as this one. We love talking with you every single day in our thriving Join the Party Discord chat forum, where you can get pics of dogs shaped like and named after bagels and cats shaped like loaves on the daily. There’s bonus content from this campaign and Campaign 1. It’s like two-and-a-half years of bonus content guys, plus special prezzie-no-reasons like the Join the Team miniseries that is airing. The last part is coming very soon. So, if you're able to, please do join us for as little as $5 at patreon.com/jointhepartypod. And, if you haven’t checked your patreon in a while, go head in and check your dashboard. Make sure you're on one of our new tiers. The old tiers will say old tier in the title. We made these new ones back in March. And a lot of you are still on the old one. So, you're not getting those sweet, sweet rewards! Again, patreon.com/jointhepartypod. If you wish you had more Multitude shows to catch up on, I have good news for you. We made a weekly, friendly debate show featuring all of our Multitude hosts called Head Heart Gut. MultiCrew members can listen to all Multitude hosts put way too much effort and research into questions like: What is the best classic board game? And, yes, scramble accounts. Which course of a holiday meal is best? And, of course, there is stuff related to Star Wars. Head Heart Gut is exclusively for members of the MultiCrew. And that is our membership program that supports all of Multitude to help us try new things and launch new shows. Your pledge adds up to us being able to remain an independent business making the stuff we want to make that you want to listen to. So, if you can, please lend us your support at multicrew.club. You can get a street team sticker pack. You can get a glittery enamel pin – it’s jacket season y'all. You need cute pins to wear on your jackets – and even assigned poster in your name on an actual plaque that we have in our actual office. All of that and more at multicrew.club. We’re sponsored this week by Inked Gaming. Are you shopping for the perfect gift for that special nerd in your life? Your search is over because Inked Gaming's website is full of everything you need to make their holiday season one to remember. From specially curated gift bundles to gift cards and even custom-printed products, Team Inked has something for just about everyone. Do you want to get your favorite photo together printed in a tapestry forever? This is your chance. And, now, to top it all off, we have a code for 10 percent off your order. Head to inkedgaming.com/jointheparty and use the code JOINTHEPARTY at checkout for 10 percent off your order. That's inkedgaming.com/jointheparty and the code is JOINTHEPARTY. Finally, we are also sponsored by Hero Forge. Hero Forge offers fully customizable tabletop minis with dozens of fantasy races and thousands of parts to choose from. The earrings are amazing. The stuff you can hold in your hands are amazing. The bases are super, super cool. We love our minis, particularly now that they offer full color sets because I am not able to paint minis. It is a skill that I do not have and I admire everybody who does. But, in the meantime, I can visit heroforge.com and design my own custom mini there today and you should too. Check back often to heroforge.com because they add new content every dang week. I promise it is very fun. You are gonna want to check it out, heroforge.com And, now, back to the show.
Theme Music
Eric: I think, at this point, like, the party is now kicked off now that everybody's ready. Val's mom comes through and she brings boob mugs for everybody.
Julia (as Val): Oh, hell yeah.
Eric: Hitomi and Taylor love it so much. It's so funny.
Julia (as Val): I think this might be the first time my mom is meeting Hitomi. I’m not sure.
Eric: Yeah, I think so. I think too.
Julia (as Val): Sure. Yeah. Smart.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Amanda: Good buffer. Good buffer.
Eric: Yeah.
Julia (as Val): Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: So, it's a lot of your mom telling Hitomi really embarrassing stories of you.
Julia (as Val): Oh.
Eric: I remember this one time.
Julia (as Val): No. Shut up, mom.
Eric: It's a lot of – a lot of that. Yeah. And then Dez and January come through, but the, the sting of the assumed January is really subsumed by Taylor Swift.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: So, everyone is just like, “Oh, hell yeah. Look, oh, she had that rabbit who knew Casey in the bag. Oh, my god.”
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: And then he just, like, moved on. You know, January made everybody scarves.
Julia: Incredible.
Eric: And Dez has, like, like, a jug that has XXX on it. And he's like --
Eric (as Dez): Yeah, sometimes, I just make moonshine and I think this is a pretty good one. It’s like pineapple surprise.
Brandon: Milo has immediately made a beeline for Dez with his boob mug and is like --
Brandon (as Milo): Fill me up now.
Julia: Okay. Val would like to be doing shots of moonshine with Dez, Hitomi, Milo, that whole group.
Brandon: It's less a shot and more eight ounces for Milo, but sure.
Julia: That’s fine. Whatever gets you talking.
Eric: Milo, do you want to make a slide of hand check for if you pretend to take shots while people are taking shots?
Brandon (as Milo): Yes.
Brandon: He doesn't like to do shots, but he does like to drink frequently and in large amounts. Julia: Mhmm. Nice.
Eric: [Inaudible 34:59], don't we all?
Brandon: 11?
Eric: Good. Yeah. You, you try to drink your eight ounces of moonshine while people are taking shots and, like, you take one big gulp because you tipped it to hard.
Brandon: He tipped it too hard. And he’s just like have a coffee and sit and Tuna, like, pats Milo on the back.
Amanda: Aggie also texts Val and Milo.
Amanda (as Aggie): Just give me the high sign if you want me to sober you up a little bit. It's like it's the – you know, the healing stuff.
Julia (as Val): I’m good.
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, that's brilliant. I didn’t even think about that.
Julia (as Val): Well, you can heal my hangover tomorrow. How about that?
Eric: Sober hands, yo.
[Julia and Milo laughs]
Eric: I think at, like, 9:00, Lucas comes in. Like, he comes in and, like, says hi to Aggie and says hi to everyone and comes over to Milo. He’s like --
Eric (as Lucas): Did you see Apple and Zak come?
Brandon: Milo shakes his head no.
Eric (as Lucas): Ooh.
Eric: And then you both get a text from Apple and Zak Rose being like --
Eric (as Apple): Oh, we started watching Battlestar again. Ooh.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: It’s a setup.
Brandon: They're making out, aren't they?
Eric: Milo, make a charisma check with disadvantage.
[Dice thrown]
Brandon (as Milo): Six.
Eric: God.
Amanda: Oh, god.
Eric: Apple and Zack Rose spend a lot of time together.
Brandon: Huh!
Julia: That’s weird.
Brandon: Weird.
Eric: Hmm.
Amanda: Really good friends. Just good pals.
Eric: Yeah. And then Lucas says --
Eric (as Apple): Apple and Zak Rose spend a lot of time together.
Brandon: And Milo just shakes his head yes.
Eric: Yeah. Lucas is like --
Eric (as Lucas): Alright. Well, I guess I'll – I'll go get myself a drink. Does that – I don't know what I'm most surprised by, Taylor Swift, the rabbit, or the moonshine.
Julia: All, all of the above.
Eric: Alright. Well, I can't drink Taylor Swift.
Julia: Can you drink rabbit? That’s concerning.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: That, that was a less funny thing to say, but here we are. Here we go.
[Julia and Brandon laugh].
Eric: I think that Lucas goes straight for the moonshine.
Amanda: I feel like he and Dez have some interesting comment. So, they can probably hit it off.
Eric: Yeah, I think so, too. I think they're both into, like, that Nordic sport where you carry your wife --
Julia: Yes.
Eric: -- through an obstacle course.
Brandon: Eric, what?
[Eric chuckles]
Julia: That is a thing.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Look it up. I’m DMing. I can't look for stuff right now.
Julia: I got it.
Eric (as Dez): So, the real key I think is if you do a fireman carry as opposed to, like, you're carrying bread. That really helps you on the – on the water sections.
Eric: Yeah, you have to be a fucking noob to not do the fireman carry. Everybody knows that.
Eric (as Dez): Yeah, fucking, fucking noob.
[Julia and Amanda laugh]
Brandon: Milo downs another mug full of moonshine.
Eric: Yeah, right. Alright. Yeah. What do you all do? Anything, anything? You're just partying on?
Julia: By the time Lucas showed up, I feel like Val is drunk enough that they are acting like they know him.
[Amanda and Eric laugh]
Eric: Yeah, I love that. It's very funny.
Amanda: I think Aggie will mostly, you know, keep the, the chip bowls full. Like, orders pizza at some point, puts the – a couple of, like, casseroles and dishes and stuff, you know, on the stove.
Amanda (as Aggie): And I'm probably the most regular around Taylor except for Quinn. So, I think I'll chat with them a little bit too and ask Taylor for embarrassing Quinn stories.
Eric: Yeah, Taylor – Taylor's like --
Eric (as Taylor): Oh, man, you're not gonna believe this. So, we were in – we were hanging out with Bonnie Fair. Right. And Bonnie Fair was like, “Oh, my god, we should make a bonfire.” And, and then Quinn was like, “Oh, yeah, I've been doing that for my whole life.” And I was like, “Oh, my god, no way.” So, then Kylie – Kylie and I were like, “Oh, my god, that’s so crazy.” And then Quinn did it. And then she nearly burned down the forest. It was very funny.”
Amanda (as Aggie): I can't believe you didn't FaceTime me on how to start fires.
Eric (as Quinn): I got it. I get it, though.
Julia: Too much.
Eric: No, Bonnie Fair was fine. And Bonnie Fair had to move his mobile home at his other mobile home. Just away.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: But it was like it was fine, honestly. Well, his mobile home and then the mobile home – the mobile home he – where he keeps all of his synthesizers.
Julia: Ah, of course.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: It's a full, like, camper van for his synthesizers.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): I think, also, if Dez has a free moment, I want to show him my tool shed because I'm really proud of my pegboard and, like, all the organization I have with my little station.
Eric: I love that. Yeah, you, you can go out there. And Dez is like --
Eric (as Dez): Hmm. I like how there's a subtle – there's a subtle alphabetic organization, but you wouldn't really know that unless you were – it's actually alphabetically organized by type of tool.
Julia: Exactly.
[Julia chuckles]
Amanda (as Aggie): Thank you.
Eric (as Dez): And it’s like you had – it's like this is first one he’s cutting. And then --
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: Because, when you think, “Oh, I need to do something. I need to turn. I need to cut. I need to pry.”
Eric: Hey.
Amanda (as Aggie): Like, you know – you know what I'm talking about? I knew you’d get it, Dez.
Eric (as Dez): No, it’s good stuff. I love that. That’s so good. If you want any moonshine, I still have – I have another jug in my – in my – I have another jug in my motorcycle.
Amanda (as Aggie): I’ll – I'll let you know. Thank you.
Eric (as Dez): Yeah, Lucas drinks so much of it. I have to go it from my bike.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: Yeah, I think, for every two full cups of moonshine that Milo drinks, I will subtly heal him slightly so that he is drunk as opposed to blackout.
Brandon: And Milo is so confused why this is happening. Why he can’t get more drunk?
Eric (as Dez): Here's the thing. I've also been switching it just with pineapple juice just to see if he would notice. He does not.
Amanda (as Aggie): Oh, Dez, you're such a friend.
Eric (as Dez): It was – it was more of a fun joke for me. Happy, happy Christmas.
[Julia and Amanda laugh]
Eric (as Dez): Happy Christmas to me even though I don't believe it. I just find that it's more of a fun thing to say around people.
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda: It’s a seasonal joke. You don't get to say that, you know, all year round.
Eric (as Dez): It's true.
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric (as Dez): Happy holidays. Like, are you talking about Arbor Day? You just like --
[Brandon laughs]
Brandon: It’s valid. Milo just does that thing, you know, when you're at a party and you're really uncomfortable, so, you just go and sit down next to someone and, like, don't say anything. You just, like, sit slightly too close to them so they know something's up, but you, like, look straight ahead.
Julia: Who does he sit down next to?
Brandon: January. He just goes and sits down next to January.
Julia: Excellent.
Eric: Yeah.
Amanda: Cool.
Julia: Very good.
Eric (as January): Hey, man. Hey man, what's up?
Eric: Also, January is holding a bottle of beer in a paw. Just so you know.
Julia: Incredible.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: He’s drinking – January's drinking Miller High Life. It's so good.
Brandon: Ahh.
Julia: Incredible.
Brandon: Miller High is delicious.
Amanda: Glass bottle or can?
Eric: Oh, glass bottle. Yeah.
Amanda: Nice.
Brandon: Oh, yeah. Milo says nothing. He just nods, but I'm sure Tuna has a – something to say to January.
[Eric laughs]
Eric (as January): Hmm. Milo's doing that thing where he avoids emotional – emotional talks because he has feelings and he doesn’t want people to know about it. Hmm. Hey, did you see that was Taylor Swift?
Brandon: Milo nods.
[Brandon laugh]
Eric (as January): Yeah, man. Okay. Okay. I mean what's up? What's the – what's the emotional thing?
Eric: And Tuna is like --
Eric (as Tuna): He's a bad friend.
[Brandon, Amanda, and Julia laugh]
Eric (as January): Oh, is that – that's a real – is that – I'm sorry that your ghost cat is sitting – I’m sorry your ghost cat just said that. That was really – that was rude.
Brandon: Milo nods.
Eric (as January): So, let's see what's up. What's going on?
[Music playing]
Eric (as January): Alright. Well, here’s the thing, Milo.
Eric: Brandon just nodded on this audio program.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as January): Hey, man. So, you know, if you are being a bad friend, whatever you're doing, I'm sure that your friend just kind of wants you to know what – what's up. And you should just talk to him about what's – what's happening. I'm sure whatever it is, it's not complicated and something you just resolve in a conversation. You know, as a rabbit --
[Julia chuckles]
Eric (as January): -- I could just kind of look at the moonshine and I just kind of get a little buzzed.
[Amanda, Brandon, and Julia laugh]
Eric: This is great.
Amanda: Julia, what is – what does Hitomi think of the whole scene?
Julia: I don't know.
Amanda: Does she know about Val’s identity?
Julia: No, Val has not told Hitomi that they are superhero.
Eric: Yes. I was gonna ask you. So, you know, how do you tell Hitomi that everybody – how everybody knows each other? I think Hitomi is just like --
Eric (as Hitomi): So, who – babe, who is every – who is everybody here? How do you know them?
Julia (as Val): Just like you know when you live in Lake Town City for – you know, since you were a kid.
Eric (as Hitomi): Yeah.
Julia (as Val): You, you know people.
Eric (as Hitomi): Yeah.
Julia: Is Hitomi from Lake Town City originally?
Eric: No, Hitomi is actually from Seattle --
Julia: Okay.
Eric: -- and has moved to Lake Town City for – we haven't talked about her job or anything.
Julia: Like, coder. She's like a coder, I feel.
Eric: Yeah, I think she just like work – I think everybody in Lake Town City is still like a little bit of a company town in this way. I think she just, like, does very tech things for Moral Corp.
Julia: Mhmm.
Eric: She's like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, yeah, I build. I build.
Amanda: Like, a system’s engineer. Something like that.
Eric: Yeah, like, one of those jobs that you know is, like, complicated, but you have no idea what it actually – what they do.
Julia: Yeah, it works out.
Eric: Yeah, she's – yeah, she's definitely a coder. And she's like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Oh, yeah, I guess – yeah, I mean it's kind of like a thing where everybody is in your neighborhood. But these – this mix of people make no sense at all.
Julia (as Val): Yeah. No, I mean it's like my mom knew Aggie’s parents and I met Milo through Aggie.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia (as Val): And – yeah. And then – yeah.
Eric (as Hitomi): And you aren’t that really close just from that, I guess.
Julia (as Val): Yeah.
Eric (as Hitomi): So, surprising. I don't hang out with any people my parents’ friends also know.
Julia (as Val): Listen, it's weird because, like, you know, being – being, like, Lake Town people, you – it's a small community. We all kind of, like, just know each other. It’s like – it's like you know how you become friends with people just because you, like, live two blocks away from them and it's just easy for you to hang out? It was like that.
Eric (as Hitomi): Alright. Okay.
Eric: Make a charisma roll for me. I was gonna do you – give you disadvantage, but then you actually described it pretty okay.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: So, we're gonna do straight.
Julia: Is this just charisma or is it like deception?
Eric: It can be deception --
Julia: Okay.
Eric: -- if you're really trying to lie.
Julia: I rolled a 16.
Eric: Cool.
Julia: If it's just regular charisma, it's 18 because that’s plus two.
Eric: That's fine.
Julia: Cool.
Eric: That's totally fine. Yeah. Hitomi is like --
Eric (as Hitomi): Alright, cool. Yeah, that's – that's weird I guess. There are only a few – for just – for such a big city, I guess, there's only, like, a few schools. So, like --
Julia (as Val): Yeah, there's, like, three high schools.
Eric (as Hitomi): Yeah.
Julia (as Val): Like, we all know each other. Weird.
Eric (as Hitomi): So weird. Yeah, so weird.
Eric: Alright. Yeah, [Inaudible 45:11].
Julia (as Val): And, like, I didn't go to Guga or like the STEM school or anything. So --
Eric: Hmm. I didn't go to Guga.
Julia (as Val): Oh, I didn't go to Guga. I just got my, my Communications Degree from [Inaudible 45:22] Lake Town City. And that’s all I did.
Eric: Across the room, that sparks Quinn and Taylor to start talking about how many Stromboli is Lady Gaga can eat in one seating.
Julia: That’s incredible.
Eric: It’s a lot.
Julia: Information that I need to know. I will revisit that later.
Eric: Listen, she's just an Italian girl from New Jersey. So, it just --
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: It is what it is. Wonderful. Okay. Cool. So, I think that this is – the party's really getting going. This is like later on in the night.
Julia: Val is drunk enough that they're just like --
Julia (as Val): I will lift anyone in this room --
Brandon: Milo raised his hand.
[Amanda laughs]
Julia (as Val): -- over my head.
Brandon: Milo raised his hand.
Julia (as Val): Milo goes first.
Eric: Lucas pushes Milo aside. He goes first.
[Brandon, Julia, and Amanda laugh]
Julia (as Val): I just pick up Lucas and start doing, like, military presses.
Eric: And Lucas is like --
Eric (as Lucas): Oh, hell yeah. Love this. This is good.
Eric: I think, at this point, the party's going. Everyone's just having a good time. And then Aggie’s front door is thrown open. And Dr. Morrow walks in wear --
Julia (as Val): There she is.
Eric: -- wearing, like, a coat that's only made for an Arctic explorers.
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: Like, it's so heavy and, like, has, like, so much fur on the hood.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: And she's, she’s carrying a bottle of absinthe in each hand --
[Brandon and Amanda laugh]
Eric: -- and says --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Who didn't – who didn’t invite me to the party?
Eric: And January is like --
Eric (as January): We love you, Morrow.
Eric: And Dez is like --
Amanda (as Aggie): Dr. Morrow.
Eric (as Dez): That’s how – that’s how it happens.
Julia: It’s very good.
Amanda (as Aggie): I silently take her coat.
Brandon: Yeah, Milo gets up to greet her and takes the bottle of absinthe away from her.
Julia: Val just goes --
Julia (as Val): Share that – share it with me.
Eric: You’ll need more to share. You already have to share it.
Amanda (as Aggie): I'm gonna to, like, steer her into the kitchen under the guise of, like, getting her a plate --
Eric: Mhmm.
Amanda (as Aggie): -- or water, or something and be like, “We are going to talk in detail about where you've been for the last week and a half. But, until then, please enjoy my party filled with friends and family, who are regular people.”
Eric: Hmm. Hmm.
Julia: Definitely a twist there.
[Brandon chuckles]
Amanda (as Aggie): Oh, yeah. Also, my sister, she, she knows Taylor Swift. Anyway, it's fine. Go ahead.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Well, you, you’re the one who invited a, a sentient rabbit. So, I don't think you have any standing on who is normal people at this party.
Amanda (as Aggie): He said it was fine.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah, January loves to party. He'll say anything.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: I love that.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. And, when asked you, you’ve even busy for a week and a half.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Oh, Aggie, you worry too much. It's fine.
Amanda (as Aggie): I literally saw a bear carrying remnants of your clothing.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah, I really like that jacket.
[Brandon and Julia laugh]
Amanda (as Aggie): Like I said, we can revisit this later. But I, I can --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): I can tell you right now. I'm right here. Wait. It’s a party. They're doing stuff. You might as well be a soundproof, soundproof room. Like, here, it's like this. There's a secret jail where we keep all of the villains. No, it is just like the clattering of party. See, nobody cares.
[Julia and Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): Is that true?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): No. No, it's not true. It's not true.
Amanda (as Aggie): Okay. But --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): But I would – that would have been a bad thing if people had heard that, but it's not true.
Amanda (as Aggie): Sure. Um, how are you? How did you get away from that bear?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Oh, great. I'm super good. Actually, like a – so, it was the skis. I am very fast. And, also, I, I used my – from my time studying with the Matadors of España --
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): -- I used my jacket as a – as a device to distract the bear when I realized it was – this was, in fact, a fake bear and not a real bear. It doesn't act as bears. Obviously, are distracted like that in the programming with – don't worry. Don't worry about it. The point is I got way. Lost the jacket, unfortunately.
Amanda (as Aggie): I'm glad you're well.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah. No, me too. No, I’m great. We should let – let’s, like – yeah, like, fuck up a good guy.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. No, it's – it's bad.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): He just – he hates me so much. I hope it's, like, for the normal reasons and not for, like, a thing I did.
[Julia laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): You know, like, you're on the internet and you're like, “Oh, they hate me because, like, I'm a powerful woman. It's like classic internet. But, like, I do a thing that ruined his life because it's a guy. You know, it's a guy. Like, Gutenberg.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Like, so, did I ruin his life through a thing I did instead of just like, oh, my god, he hates me because a woman in power and authority, you know? You know – you know, how it is.
Amanda (as Aggie): It's definitely worse when you did something.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah. It's like you and that council guy. He hate – shit.
Amanda (as Aggie): Thanks for reminding me.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Sorry. It's not like a work thing. It's like always a work thing. I – my head always is gonna go. So, it's like a work thing.
Amanda (as Aggie): I get it. It's a lifestyle for you. Yeah, I mean I, I'll – I'll defend what I did. It's still – it’s, you know, a bummer, but I had to do it.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah. Oh, wooh. Um, thank you for not letting the museum crashed out. There's some stuff in there that would have been bad.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. Why is the only way to override the city electrics in your locked office in a locked museum?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): No, there were other ones, but it got ripped out by the bear.
Amanda (as Aggie): I'm just saying maybe a few more fail safes, a few people --
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): -- contacts, you know, some of – some wireless devices perhaps that we or you or some keepers can keep on them.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Oh, wait. Oh, that's actually a good point. Which – you didn't hit all the key fobs, did you?
Amanda (as Aggie): No, just, just the one.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Which one?
Amanda (as Aggie): Yellow.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Just the yellow one. You didn't hit the red one, the blue – or the blue one?
Amanda (as Aggie): No, because, knowing that that button turned on the power for the entire city, I can only imagine what the fire and/or water ones do.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yes, those are the fire ones and the water ones.
Julia: Oh, no.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Can I have --
Amanda (as Aggie): Don’t you say that.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Can I have – can I have it? Do you have it? Do you have it?
Amanda (as Aggie): Can you tell me what they do?
Eric: She takes up mug like a new – I assume you have, like, the little hooks and she, like, grabs a mug, pours a bunch of absinthe into it, takes it as a full shot. And then she’s like --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Okay. The blue one? Now, don't tell anybody this. Don't tell this. But – and don’t tell January. He's gonna be so mad.
[Julia chuckles]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): The blue one orders like $50 worth of sushi.
Amanda (as Aggie): And the red one?
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): You don't want to know more about the, the sushi thing?
Amanda (as Aggie): I, I know what I need to know about that one.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Okay. Cool. You know why I gave it to you because I get it to the – to the office and then January gets mad because we usually eat sushi together. But, sometimes, I want sushi for lunch and others I don’t.
Amanda (as Aggie): Right, right, right.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Right. The red one is for emergencies.
Julia: Can you real insight on this?
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. Or can I persuade her to tell me more?
Eric: Yeah, do it for insight.
[Dice roll]
Amanda (as Aggie): 15.
Eric: Okay. 15. Yeah, the blue ones probably for sushi. And the red one is probably for emergencies.
Amanda (as Aggie): I wonder what that means.
Eric: I, I don't have to tell you everything.
Amanda (as Aggie): Alright. Well, here they are. And I'm glad they did not get pushed in my pocket or anything.
Eric: Mhmm.
Amanda (as Aggie): And I hand them over. There on, like, a key ring in a plastic bag inside a paper bag that I got.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: Wonderful. Great.
Julia: It’s drugs. There's drugs in there.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Wait. Where's the – where's the – where's the lockbox?
Amanda (as Aggie): That's all I had. Is there other, like, important stuff in there?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Oh, yeah. Um, yeah, just some, some stuff. Who found – who found it first if it wasn't you? I assumed it was you because – oh, I didn't leave the key. Ah, I didn't replace that.
Amanda (as Aggie): No.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Did you get the note that said haha and gotcha and next time?
Amanda (as Aggie): Sure did.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Ahhh, I should have --
Amanda (as Aggie): Sure yelled at that.
[Julia laughs]
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): I need to replace that.
Amanda (as Aggie): It was an – it was a close thing and I – to be honest, I don't know who got it first. It was all pretty mixed up. I'll – I’ll ask the folks though.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah, there was just – it was in a lockbox that had some other stuff in it. And that whole thing was gone. So, I mean it might have just been, like, in the rubble or got moved around, but I just – if you know where it is, just let me know.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. No, I'll ask these guys when they're not drunk on Dez’s moonshine. Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Mhmm. That's a good shit. It's called – we call it Dez’s shine.
Amanda (as Aggie): Wow.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Get it? Because it's a – it's a combination of Dez’s name and moonshine.
Amanda (as Aggie): Have you ever wanted to meet Taylor Swift, Dr. Morrow?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): I would love that.
Amanda (as Aggie): She's right by the fireplace.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Man, Red got me so – through some times. Oh, Taylor.
[Julia laughs]
Brandon: You look over and Milo has stood up. And, from, like, eight feet away from Taylor's, he goes --
Brandon (as Milo): Taylor, I could get you to the museum after hours.
[Amanda laughs]
Brandon (as Milo): Also, I don't think this is – I don't think this is absinthe.
Julia: Val’s just steering him away very, very shortly out of the room.
Brandon (as Milo): Do you want some?
Julia (as Val): Alright. Let's go outside. Yes.
Brandon (as Milo): [Inaudible 54:07].
Eric: And Quinn is coming over to you. He’s like – Quinn is coming over to you. He’s like --
Eric (as Quinn): This would be such a cool time for you to --
Brandon (as Milo): How do you feel about ghosts?
Eric (as Quinn): It's should be such a cool time for you to fly right now. You should actually --
Julia (as Val): No. No, we’re going outside.
Amanda (as Aggie): Quinn, what the fuck?
Brandon (as Milo): Quinn.
Eric (as Quinn): Hey, Milo said he could fly. I want to see him fly.
Brandon (as Milo): Yes. As, as --
Julia (as Val): No, we’re not flying.
Brandon (as Milo): As Val, like, pushes me outside, my left --
Julia (as Val): I’m grappling you.
Brandon (as Milo): My left leg turns into gas but nothing else.
[Eric and Julia laugh]
Julia (as Val): Incredible.
Eric: Val, you’ve pushed Milo outside and Lucas follows closely behind. And Lucas is like --
Eric (as Lucas): Hey, Val, can you just, like – can you just give us a second?
Julia (as Val): Yes. Can you make sure that he – well, can you just make sure he stays still, I guess?
Brandon: Milo is just, like, leaning to the left.
Eric (as Lucas): Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I can – I can – I’m going – I’ll do my – yeah, I can do that.
Julia (as Val): Alright. Okay. Alright.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
Julia: And Val goes back inside.
Brandon (as Milo): Thanks, Val. Val, thank you.
Julia (as Val): You're welcome, Milo.
Eric: So, this is like – I don’t – this is like four drink Milo, right?
Brandon (as Milo): Luke, Luke. Can I call you Luke?
Eric (as Lucas): It's already happening.
[Julia and Amanda laugh]
Brandon (as Milo): Do you think Apple and Zak are kissing?
Eric (as Lucas): What? Our good friends Apple and Zak? Zakary Rose?
Brandon (as Milo): I think they’re kissing.
Eric (as Lucas): I don't – that doesn't really make any sense.
Brandon (as Milo): You, you know what Battlestar Galactica does to people, Luke.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric (as Lucas): Gross, but true. Okay. Um, hey.
Brandon (as Milo): Shhh. Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh.
Eric (as Lucas): Are you – did you put your hand up? You’re like you put your hand on his face?
Brandon (as Milo): I did. Look at my leg.
Eric: Hey, Lucas looks down. And it's, like, invisible. He's like --
Eric (as Lucas): You're such a fucking idiot. You're so bad at hiding those stuff.
Brandon (as Milo): Luke, Luke, I got – I got --
Eric (as Lucas): I saw you fake – I – you fucking --
Eric: He punches you in the arm.
Eric (as Lucas): I saw you phase through a door. And then you lied to – about it to my face.
Brandon (as Milo): You saw me? I didn't – you didn’t --
Eric (as Lucas): I was stand – yeah. You – remember when you said – first of all, you came at – first of all, fuck – oh, that, that was you? Fuck. You’re with the – with the kid gal? That – of course. Oh, my god. It was you with – yes, you saw some guy with ghosts powers came and told me to – told me see this and told me to stay put. And then you showed up randomly. And I was like, “What?” And then you ran away. And then I was like, “What's Milo doing?” And I saw you phase through a door.
Brandon (as Milo): Luke is just saying a lot of words right now.
[Amanda chuckles]
Eric: He punches you again.
Brandon (as Milo): You want to see a ghost cat?
Eric (as Lucas): Yes. What?
Brandon (as Milo): Here, here touch my shoulder.
Eric: He puts a hand on your shoulder. And then Tuna’s like --
Eric (as Tuna): Oh, oh, you finally talked about your feelings, you dumb bitch.
[Brandon and Julia laugh]
Eric: And Lucas is like --
Eric (as Lucas): What? Oh, my god. That's your cat. That cat died, like, three years ago.
Brandon (as Milo): I know. It's really annoying that it's still around.
Eric (as Lucas): Oh, my god. You're – I'm sure your dad loves that. So --
Brandon (as Milo): No, my dad doesn't know. Don't tell him anything.
Eric (as Lucas): Oh, okay. So, okay, who, who, who knows?
Brandon (as Milo): You.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
Brandon (as Milo): I have tried to impress Quinn --
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
Brandon (as Milo): -- on multiple occasions.
Eric (as Lucas): Right.
Brandon (as Milo): It’s not gone well. I think I lost my chances with Taylor.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
[Everybody laugh]
Eric (as Lucas): Wait. So, Taylor knows you have powers?
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, I thought we were talking about my love life. What? What?
Eric (as Lucas): No, my god. Alright. Okay.
Julia: There's you.
Eric (as Lucas): Milo --
Brandon (as Milo): Oh.
Eric (as Lucas): -- who knows you have powers?
Brandon (as Milo): Oh. Oh. Oh. Well, Dr. Morrow does, of course. Dr. Morrow.
Eric (as Lucas): Doctor – the Mayor, Dr. Morrow, our super boss?
Brandon (as Milo): But Dr. Morrow knows everything. Haven’t you – did you not read the, the biographies that I gave you?
Eric (as Lucas): Oh, right, right, right. Yeah. Yeah.
Brandon (as Milo): And it’s like it's close to omnipresent as you can get.
Eric (as Lucas): Yeah, that's true.
Brandon (as Milo): Um, Quinn.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
Brandon (as Milo): Uh, Taylor doesn't.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay.
Brandon (as Milo): Tuna does.
Eric (as Lucas): Okay. So, then, if that was you there, who were the – who are the other – who's the preserver, Anvil Connie, and that girl who can --
Brandon (as Milo): Shh. Shh. Shh.
Eric (as Lucas): And who can stick to walls with the mask?
[Amanda chuckles]
Brandon (as Milo): It's a secret.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric: He punches you again. You --
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Lucas): Milo, I swear to fucking god. You already lied to me once. Who are they?
Brandon (as Milo): I didn’t – I, I'm not lying to you now. I'm protecting people and you.
Eric (as Lucas): You just lied to my face. I'm your best friend and you lied to me that you had powers. I said, “Milo, this is your chance.” [Inaudible 58:55] and you didn’t.
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah, I lied then. I'm not lying now. Now, I’m just protecting.
Eric (as Lucas): Ooh, fuck. Okay. So, you are – like, I got to know --
Brandon (as Milo): I don’t want you to get hurt.
Eric (as Lucas): You – I’m not gonna get – who’s gonna hurt me?
Brandon (as Milo): If people know that you know things, then, like, they're gonna come after you to get to me or all the other folks.
Eric (as Lucas): Oh, my god. Does that make me your Lois Lane?
[Julia and Brandon laughs]
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah, it does.
Julia: Goddess.
Eric (as Lucas): A goddess. I look so bad in a pencil skirt, you fucking asshole.
Brandon (as Milo): I think you look great. It really highlights your delts.
Eric: He punches you three times.
[Amanda laughs]
Eric (as Lucas): You’re such a – oh, my god. Alright. Don't lie to me again. One, don't lie to me again. Tell me when this stuff happens. I’m already in.
Brandon (as Milo): I took your Swiss last week. I'm sorry.
Eric (as Lucas): Great. Not about everything just about power things, please.
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, okay.
Eric (as Lucas): Yeah. And, two, oh, god, just don't do anything that will get you hurt, okay?
Brandon (as Milo): When have I ever done anything to get anyone – come on. Let's go talk to Taylor.
Eric: He punches you in the stomach and walks inside.
[Everybody laugh]
Eric: Aggie, you throw a great party. And it didn't --
Julia (as Val): Yeah.
Eric: It wasn't just because Taylor Swift showed up.
Amanda (as Aggie): Thank you. I send everybody home with a handmade peppermint bark.
Eric: Oh, yeah.
Brandon: Ooh. As Milo's wrapping up at the party helping, you know, in his head,’ he's trying – he's helping clean up, but really he's just sort of, like --
Julia (as Val): Not at all.
Brandon: -- moving one cup to another area and then --
[Everybody laugh]
Brandon: And then, you know, back. And he's like --
Brandon (as Milo): Val, Val, pick me up.
[Amanda laughs]
Julia (as Val): Wait. Like, like carry you? You want to be carried?
Brandon (as Milo): Yeah, I want to be – Val, pick me up.
Julia (as Val): Like a – like a baby?
Brandon (as Milo): No, like, like, a strong – like, a strong thing.
Julia (as Val): Oh, okay. Okay.
Eric: Lucas says --
Eric (as Lucas): Pick him up like a wife carry a guy.
Julia (as Val): Okay. Over the shoulders into a fireman carry.
Julia: So, Val lets Milo down. And, like, as he's heading out the door, Val is just, like --
Julia (as Val): Alright. Hold on. How did you get here? Do I need to take your keys?
Julia: And just like goes into his pocket to grab his keys.
Brandon (as Milo): No, I don't even have – I, I have a house key. And it – there's – I have a key to my, my expensive comic books. I have the key --
Julia (as Val): There’s a whole key to your expensive comic books?
Brandon (as Milo): They’re in a lockbox. I – don’t --
Julia (as Val): Alright. Alright.
Brandon (as Milo): Shh. Don’t tell anyone that.
Julia (as Val): Alright.
Brandon (as Milo): And I got the key to the museum, but I just – I don't – I just – you know.
Julia (as Val): Can I sleight of hand it?
Eric: Yeah, roll, roll sleight of hand to check Milo's pockets.
Julia (as Val): Rolled 19 plus four.
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, my god.
Eric: Yeah, baby. You get in there and you take all of my loose keys.
Julia (as Val): Alright.
Eric: Yeah. Milo, do you have the locket and the ID card on you?
Brandon (as Milo): In different pockets, but yeah.
Eric: Yeah, I think that you, you swiped them.
Julia: Yeah, I, I don't think Val understands, like, what they are. And I think that they probably assume that the ID card is, like, Milo's ID card for the museum.
Eric: Mhmm.
Julia: But the locket kind of catches their interest and they kind of, like, slip that into their pocket being like --
Julia (as Val): No, alright. Not like – not like I'm gonna steal and pawn this, but this seems like a weird thing to --
[Brandon laughs]
Julia (as Val): -- to have in your pocket.
Julia: And then returns Milo's keys be like --
Julia (as Val): Alright. Make sure you take like a rideshare home or --
Brandon (as Milo): Taylor, do you need a ride?
Julia (as Val): This is – okay, that's – that's too weird. Let’s – let’s get you in, like, a cab.
Brandon (as Milo): Is, is she still here?
Eric: Here's the thing. Taylor disappeared, like, 15 minutes before everybody started leaving. She Irish goodbye you all so hard.
Julia (as Val): Nice.
Amanda: Aggie whispers --
Amanda (as Aggie): I respect it.
[Eric and Julia chuckles]
Brandon (as Milo): Taylor. Val, Taylor left. I didn’t --
Julia (as Val): Yeah, it's okay. Alright. Let's get you home. Let's put you in a car.
Amanda (as Aggie): Did she follow you guys on Instagram? She followed me on Instagram.
(Eric snickers)
Julia (as Val): That's very cool.
Eric: She made an account for Sushi. And Sushi now has 100,000 Instagram followers.
[Brandon chuckles]
Julia (as Val): Incredible.
Eric: Yeah, Lucas is, once again, trying to chat up Quinn. Quinn is – I don't know if I've ever seen someone look at their phones so much and so hard.
[Julia, Brandon, and Amanda laugh]
Eric: It’s not working. But, yeah, he, you know, wraps up.
Julia: Val was just like --
Julia (as Val): Do you also need a ride, Lucas? Because you could probably go with Milo.
Eric (as Lucas): Yes, thank you, please.
Julia (as Val): Alright. I'll put you both in a cab.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Lucas): Cool.
Eric: January has done Casey at the Bat three times.
Julia (as Val): Incredible.
Eric: And Dr. Morrow puts an arm over January’s shoulder and an arm over Dez’s shoulder. She’s like --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Come on, boys. We’re heading home.
[Everyone laughs]
Brandon: That’s normal.
Eric: Yeah. And then they just walk out into the night. And, yeah, there you go. Aggie, your house is once again party less.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah, ears ring. I really enjoy putting all the stuff away. I put on some Allman Brothers, some Doobie Brothers. Just mix them all up.
[Brandon, Julia, and Eric laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): And then tomorrow's I’ll just text everyone to thank them for coming.
Eric: Yeah. You then realize that Quinn has fallen asleep on the floor in your kitchen.
Amanda (as Aggie): We have a procedure for this.
[Julia and Eric laugh]
Amanda (as Aggie): I pick her up, put her on the couch, put a blanket over, take her shoes off, and plug her phone in.
Eric: While she's in your arms, she's like – she wakes up for a second and she's like --
Eric (as Quinn): What if I – what if they called me sticky girl?
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): Keep trying. We'll find one.
Eric (as Quinn): Okay. Val didn’t like sticky hands.
Amanda (as Aggie): I think we can do better.
Eric (as Quinn): Okay. Maybe we just need to keep the word sticky. [Snores]
[Brandon and Amanda laugh]
Eric: Wonderful. Alright. So, that is December. And, when New Year's happens it is 20XX plus one. Happy 20XX plus one. Let's do some entanglements y'all.
Brandon: Yay.
Amanda: Whoa.
Eric: So, Aggie, this is something that you suggested during the meeting episode a few episodes back. It is your New Year's resolution to have some sort of, like, awareness or patrol to your being around. Just, like, waiting for someone to throw the proverbial bat signal in there.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah, I want to get more proactive from the sense of, like, I don't want to show up like we’d had to at SUNY and be in a disaster that's halfway in the making. But, also, just to stay more in touch with other people in my life besides my superhero friends because it's been a lot of that for a while. So, I think I, probably, on, like, two or three days after New Year's, text some friends or, like, go visit some people that I know in various neighborhoods.
Eric: Mhmm.
Amanda (as Aggie): Like, I know, you know, the clerk at one of the Astros really well. I know the guy that maintains the, like, giant mountain lobster sign, which requires a lot of maintenance because it’s very old.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: True.
Amanda (as Aggie): So, I think I just kind of, like, mine my network, you know, and, like, try to come up with some contacts that I can ask to just kind of keep me posted on how things are going in their sector.
Eric: Wonderful.
Brandon: Mountain lobster Joe. He's the one that takes care of it.
Eric: I like – I like that you have a community network now. I do think that this takes a lot of time and effort on your part.
Amanda (as Aggie): Yeah. Yeah.
Eric: So, like, this is, now, I don't know if you have any free time. I don't know if you had any before, but, like, you just don't have any free time. And that's something that you just – will come up later, but I have no mechanical penalty for you right now. But, first, I will give you the choice of which of these things will happen because you might have been the first one for it to come upon. So, here's what we're going to do. The three of you are going to roll 3D10 like we do usually. And then I will give you a little bit of clues of – and, Aggie, you’ll go first and you can pick. Just go after these little clues about which one you want to do.
Amanda (as Aggie): Okay.
[Dice rolls]
Julia (as Val): I got 8, 3, 2.
Brandon (as Milo): 1, 2, 6.
Amanda (as Aggie): 3, 7, 5.
Eric: Great. So, Aggie, I'm just gonna give you the places because of your community outreach. These things are happening over the entire winter. So, these are happening in different times. This is more about just – Amanda, you can pick which one of these things. There seems to be a large crowd gathering at one of the parks in the city. There seems to be some criminal activity happening at the Thornhill Coffee Shop. Like, the prime one. I don't know if you've been --
[Brandon chuckles]
Eric: -- in New York City. There's that really, really fancy Starbucks on, like, Eighth Avenue that's like, “This is where the roasting happens.” It's, like, so elaborate. And, so, so, this is, like, the flagship Thornhill Coffee Store. And then someone throw – doing some strange stuff at Dr. Morrows house.
Amanda (as Aggie): I think I'll go with the crowd.
Eric: Okay. We'll start with that one. So, Aggie, this is like, in January, it's still bitter cold.
Amanda: I'm sorry. I have to interrupt you. What does the January do during January? Is it, like, his birthday month?
Eric: Yeah, it's his birthday month.
Amanda: Excellent.
Eric: Yeah, he, he declares it his birthday month and he just, like, parties all, all month.
Brandon: What a good rabbit.
Amanda (as Aggie): I make him a sweater that has, like in the periodic table styling, a J – a big J and a little Y.
Eric: Ooh.
Amanda (as Aggie): Like, that’s his element. Yeah.
Eric: I love that.
Julia: Aww.
Eric: That’s just so good. That's so adorable. Alright. So, this is January – middle of January. It's like bitter cold. But still, in Lake Town City, as long as the wind chill isn't below zero, we can still go, go outside, right? So, you're at one of the public parks nearby. And there seems to be, like, a gathering of people surrounding. And someone has put an old-timey stagecoach in the middle of the public park.
Amanda (as Aggie): Interesting. I'm gonna just, like, amble up and take a look.
Eric: You're wearing your preserver costume, right?
Amanda (as Aggie): I am, yeah. But I'm kind of keeping my, my head down and I have like a big parka. So, I feel like I'm semi incognito.
Eric: Okay.
Amanda (as Aggie): But I have my – like, my hat is shielding my face.
Eric: Yeah. And I think go – then he goes like, “Per, per, per, per, per, per. Introducing the new wonder drug rom Painkiller Larson and Big Jeff.” And stepping out of the stage coach is what looks to be a mid-30s white man with long, scraggly hair and a white cowboy hat, riding a brown grizzly bear. And he’s like --
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): Hello y’all. My name is Painkiller Larson. I'm the best doctor this side of the Mississippi, but don't let the mainstream media tell you about that. And this right here is my good friend, Big Jeff. Big Jeff, can you say hello? You say hello to the audience there.
Eric: And Big Jeff goes --
Eric (as Big Jeff): [Inaudible 1:08:56].
Eric: And then everyone was like, “Oh, wow. A bear that can talk. Oh, my god.” And then they call clap.
Amanda: Aggie goes --
Amanda (as Aggie): Fuck no.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): I'll tell you – listen, I know that you all have the sniffles. It’s getting cold out now. But what you can do is you can have Painkiller Larson and Big Jeff’s suppository, both for the mouth and then the other place, way of keeping the cold away. I call it My Wonder Drug.
Amanda (as Aggie): Or better yet, get your seasonal flu shots. And then I, like, walk across sort of in front of the pair – the cowboy between him and the crowd. And I'm like, “So sorry, folks. There was a permit mix up. We don't have a commercial license for the sale of things here. Also, get your flu shot and don't trust people who say the phrase mainstream media. Thank you very much. Enjoy the rest of your beautiful day here in Lake Town City.
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): Oh, it sounds that we have here – we have nice sam, someone who wants to put a needle in your body. You know who also had needles? Hellraiser who is a monster.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): Instead, you could be eating a pill or putting it in your – in the privacy of your own home in your butt.
Amanda: Can I do my emissary of peace?
[Eric laughs]
Eric: You [inaudible 1:10:06]. Well, so, how are you gonna calm the situation?
Amanda (as Aggie): I think I just want with my, like, uniformed Ranger. You know, like, I look like a parks employee and sort of send people on their way. And I'm used to dispelling kind of crowds and middle schoolers. So, hopefully, you know, this works. And then I'll turn to the – I think I’ll actually just, like, pet the bear and have the bear chill. And, at the same time, say to Painkiller Larson, “Oh, are you – did you come into town from somewhere else? Do you have a, a retail presence here on the ground?” And just try to, like, distract him into, like, a one-on-one combo.
Eric: Into talking about logistics and permits?
Amanda (as Aggie): Oh, yeah.
Eric: Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, let's just do this roll. He is a resolute fella. I think you need to get a 16 to have him caught up in the minutiae of his performance.
Amanda (as Aggie): Cool. So, I'm gonna make a charisma check.
Eric: Yes, you can – yeah, you can do this persuasion because this is part of your emissary of peace.
[Dice rolls]
Amanda (as Aggie): 13 plus – that is a 17.
Julia: Yay.
Eric: Ahh, yeah.
Julia: Did it.
Eric: I, I think that you standing it out, you – he then be like --
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): Hey, I filed with the Department of Parks and I’ve a permit for demonstration and all the things.
Amanda (as Aggie): You know, I keep telling them to change that. There is the Parks Department and then there is the Department of Parks and Wildlife. And those two things, confusingly, are different. Which one did you do? Do you have this receipt in your email maybe?
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): I mean I can go look in the stagecoach. I got – hold on.
Eric: And then he goes back in the stagecoach and has to argue with Aggie. And, while you're doing that, the crowd disperses. He’d be like --
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): No, wait. I have all these things. I got pills. I have syrup. I have little tiny mushrooms you can just pop into your mouth. Now, please, it's all – it's all perfectly nature. Why? Wait. God. Lady, lady, you have a lot of nerve coming in here and --
[Brandon snickers]
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): You have a lot of nerve coming in here and ruining my legitimate business.
Amanda (as Aggie): Unless you are literally from the 1830s, I have no sympathy for quacks.
Eric (as Painkiller Larson): Goddamn it. Let's – let's rock, Big Jeff. Charge.
Eric: [Inaudible 1:12:01].
[Brandon laughs]
Amanda (as Aggie): I think I stand there with my hands on my hips for a good five minutes just kind of watching him go.
[Brandon and Eric laugh]
Eric: Wonderful. Okay. Milo, this is, like, the beginning of February. It's like it's just snowed in. And it's like, also, raining a little bit. It's just wet and gross and, like, chills you down to the bone as if you're dead. No pun intended.
[Eric and Julia laugh]
Eric: You go over to Dr. Morrow’s place and she's like --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Oh, my god, think. Ugh, I just like – I don't have enough time to deal with this. And it's ruining my whole day. Can you just look?
Eric: And she points to, like, in her office. There, she has a big screen. There's a person with a plague doctor mask on screen --
Brandon: Nooo. No.
Eric: -- reading. It looks like it's a – it's one of those – it’s – it's like someone sent her a VHS tape and, like, she just playing this video. Someone's like – she’s like --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Someone play this video. And I don't know what to do. And I cannot handle it.
Eric: The guy's wearing a plague doctor mask with just a gray, like, flannel suit on.
Brandon: No.
Eric: He also has a big yellow pad and a big black marker and in, like, the garbled, like, computer voice says --
Eric (as the mask guy): Dr. Morrow, I've seen when you are going to die. It is within the year. I know the actuary.
Eric: And it’s then he turns the pad around. And he, he's written, “Dr. Morrow will die this year,” on it. And, right now, it's just a video.
Brandon (as Milo): Well, Dr. Morrow, if there's one thing – one evil in this world that I would like to defeat, it's math. So, math and statistics, how do I solve this problem for you?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Can you just like – am I gonna die this year? Can you figure this out?”
Brandon (as Milo): No, you're not gonna die. Why would you die this year? This, this guy [Inaudible 1:13:46] --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): The actuary said so.
Brandon (as Milo): He just wrote it on a legal pad. Who cares?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): When I get a video – well, when I get a video saying I'm gonna die this year, it usually freaks me out.
Brandon (as Milo): Well, I understand that, but I'm saying it's not accurate. Do you know where this guy is?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): No, I just got the video.
Brandon (as Milo): Okay. Well, it's my best approach here then to just, like, distract her with a good, cool movie or something.
[Julia laughs]
Eric: So – well, yeah, if you want to just, like, just distract her, I'll give you roll performance to try to make her feel better.
Brandon: Would dispel magic do anything on this video?
Eric: That's perfect. I actually love that. Yeah, let's do this spell magic.
Brandon: So, Milo’s like --
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, okay. Just – it's gonna be okay. This is all BS.
Brandon: And then he, like, waves his hand over the VHS tape. You see – and you see two little ghost hands just go in there like little – like little elves and just, like, manipulate the tape.
Eric: I like that. It's like looking to see if this is actual prognostication. I love that. Let's say that this is a fifth level spell. So, make a DC15 check for your spell casting ability. Just straight up. Brandon: Yeah.
[Dice roll]
Brandon: 13 plus seven for 20.
Eric: Wonderful.
Julia: Nice.
Eric: So, it’s 20. So, the ghost hands go in there and it, like, looks all around. It was looking for this actual prediction and prognostication. Hey, there's nothing there. This isn't – it's just someone was a jerk and sent a videotape to Dr. Morrow to freak her out.
Brandon (as Milo): I explained that Dr. Morrow. Like, this is nothing This is just a literal tape. So, some, some asshole may come after you, but you have three superheroes and a Dez and a January around. I think it'll be okay.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Ugh, that's a good point. You know, I just haven't really felt secure since someone – I don't know what happened, like, in the time that's, you know, someone broke into my office and took, like, some precious stuff from me. So, I’ve just been feeling a little – a little shaken up.
Brandon (as Milo): Who broke into your – what do you mean?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): It was like when around the MM – when the, the the bear, the 8-bit bear was trying to destroy the, the museum. It's just like I had some valuables in there. I, I assume that something messed up. It – nothing's been – it hasn't turned up in the month since then. So, I just don’t know.
Brandon (as Milo): Were they, like, dangerous? Or, like, do we need to look out for them?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): No, like, purse. Just personal stuff. That's what really freaks me out.
Brandon (as Milo): Oh, okay.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Yeah.
Brandon (as Milo): Like, what was it?
Eric (as Dr. Morrow: You know, it's kind of private, Milo. I just --
Brandon (as Milo): Okay.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): The point is thank you. I appreciate – I, this – I call the guy who can talk to ghosts to tell me if I'm going to die.
[Brandon laughs]
Brandon (as Milo): That's a good policy to have.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): It's good. And, hey, I'm not gonna die this year. That's a good thing to know.
Brandon (as Milo): Not this year.
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Not this year.
[Julia laughs]
Julia: Oh, Jesus.
Brandon: And Milo winks.
Eric: Yeah. Yeah. Dr. Morrow is like --
Eric (as Dr. Morrow): Haha. I like the dark humor.
Eric: And she winks back. Wonderful. Alright. Let's do Val. Aggie texts you and is like --
Eric (as Aggie): Hey, I got – something happening at Thornhill Coffee Prime.
Eric: It's – she just get sent there. And she’s like --
Eric (as Aggie): We didn’t have a lot of details on it. It's just like something bad was happening.
Eric: So, you go down there and it’s just like it's all glass windows. And, like, you just see people running around in there. Like, stomping all over the opulence. Like, kicking over these coffee tables and, like, jumping off of these tufted seats.
Julia (as Val): Oh, hell yeah. Punk as hell.
[Eric and Brandon laughs]
Eric: Yeah, one of – one of the glass walls is broken because you see that there is a – there is, like, a fully-masked figure inside that’s wearing a hockey mask. So, like, a goalie mask because you can't see what they look like.
Julia: It’s Jason.
Eric: Yeah. And they were – they're just wearing, like, sweatpants and a sweatshirt. And they were running around this – the Thornhill Coffee. And it looks like – you hear, like, a vacuuming sound. Like, a vooooo. Like, a sucking. And then you see that, like, as they turn towards one of the, like, five coffee bars in there, all of the coffee and all of the coffee cake and pastries are just flying towards them and going into the hockey mask.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: This vooo, vovv, vovv and just keeps sucking all of it up. And there's a barista, like, runs past you and, like --
Eric (as the barista): They're eating everything. There's not coffee – there’s not gonna be any coffee left.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia: Alright, Val walks in and is like --
Julia (as Val): You know, fucking stop!
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: Yeah, they just – they ignore you and go over to, like, one of the, the other coffee bars. That's where they only have espresso and then just start sucking up all of the espresso.
Julia (as Val): How big is the hole in which they are sucking things into?
Eric: They're sucking it into their face. So, it is going, like, into and through the hockey mask.
Julia (as Val): Okay.
Eric: Which I guess has, like, the – if there was, like, a grate, it has, like, that ripped out.
Julia: I think what Val is gonna do is grab, like, a serving tray. You know, like a waitress would carry drinks on. And just kind of press it up against their mouth so it gets stuck.
Eric: I love that. So, I'm gonna roll plus three because that's their sucking ability.
Julia: Okay.
Eric: So, then you can do strength.
Julia: Cool. I'm raging. So --
Eric: Wonderful.
[Dice roll]
Julia: That's 13.
Eric: Okay, I got a 14.
Julia: Damn it.
Eric: So, you press the, the tray into their face and they, “Oomph. Oomph.” And then it's like someone kicked a vacuum into higher gear. It goes, “Vooov. Voo,” and eats the tray. And then sprints away from you just sucking the rest of the food up in this Thornhill Prime and then runs away through the front door.
Julia (as Val): I guess I’ll tackle them --
Eric: Yeah, do it
Julia (as Val): -- before they leave. Sure.
[Dice roll]
Julia (as Val): I rolled an 18.
Eric: Wonderful. Okay. Yeah, you – as they try to run away, you tackle them to the ground.
Julia (as Val): I think I just angled their face upward so that there's nothing --
Eric: Yeah.
Julia (as Val): -- like, in the path of their sucking.
Eric: Vooov. Voov. They're sucking into the air. I think, eventually, as someone, like, tries to get restraints on them, I want you to make a perception check.
Julia: Perception. I’m not good at that.
[Dice roll]
Julia: Ah, it’s a six.
Eric: Okay. I’m just trying to figure out what to – what to do next. And Dr. Morrow walks you through where they put the people who cause crimes with powers. You look back and you hear voomph. And you look and you see that their hands are free because they just ate their restraints.
[Brandon laughs]
Julia (as Val): What?
Eric: And then they book it and they're just gone.
Julia (as Val): Nooo!
[Brandon and Julia laughs]
Eric: On Seven and a Half News, it’s Vulcani gets eaten up by eating villain?
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: That’s the lead story.
Julia: This is what happens when I don't just knock people out.
[Brandon laughs]
Eric: This is not a meditation on spring. This is not a meditation on the world blooming after winter. This is not a meditation on feeling like the world is coming back to life or taking off your jacket like a snake shedding its skin, sloughing off love sick February, and lion tooth march to reveal your better self underneath. It's not. Don't worry. This is not a story about looking at flowers. The beautiful yellows and pinks and purples that now populate the former whites. Some might call it paint on a blank canvas or music filling a musical staff. I'm not. That's not what this is. This is also not a warning from state parks and state lands and elsewhere to leave wild plants and flowers alone no matter how much you want to take them with you. And the New York Protective Native Plants Program created in 1989 is not a metaphor for enjoying wonder in its own place and how humanity has to touch instead of just looking, children at a museum. This is about looking at the flora up close, the delicate white petals that are named the bloodroot, the yellow clusters of the wild parsnip that leave you vulnerable to the nastiest sunburns for years to come, the spring beauty, which basically looks all pink. But, when you get right down close to it, you realize the flower is white with pink stripes, barcodes almost. But it's nature. So, it's not. Though, this could be about the other things as well. Spring is a bouquet arranged by a blind florist, but it's sweet you got me flowers at all.
Transcriptionist: Rachelle Rose Bacharo
Editor: Krizia Casil